Men are never depressed.
dunkman
Posts: 19,646
well except Harmless.
but here's why men are just happier people:-
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.**
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another*petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is £8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -
One colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
but here's why men are just happier people:-
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.**
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another*petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is £8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -
One colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
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Astoria,Dublin,Reading 06,Wembley 07,Sheapards Bush & o2 09 thats multiple Jamgasms!
but i dont think these are the reasons for my mess, if they were i think i could fix this.
I have two moods, though.
naděje umírá poslední
Oh God! it's sad, but yes, it's all true :mad:
Wembley 18/06/07
If there was a reason, it was you.
O2 Arena 18/09/09
My use of the world as a urinal however does.
I thought the rain looked a little bit off-colour the other day..
- the great Sir Leo Harrison
although how cool would that be...
now fuck off as i have haggis to cook, 3 castles to build and 178 English people must die before nightfall
hey you are busy guy, and you also manage to post this at the same time, who said men can't multitask?
Whenever my GF does it it saps her mental abilities and co-ordination.
and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
over specific principles, goals, and policies.
http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg
(\__/)
( o.O)
(")_(")
remember to thank God (who clearly has a gender and it is MALE) for that bigger brain of yours.
mens brains absorb information while womens become scattered and confused
ehhhh.. castles take a while.. i had to quarry the brick using my willy as my hands were full making a home brew keg of whisky... i killed 3 english people with my right eyelashes... i'm a good blinker
(I got banned for that before, so I'd like to point out that It's a blackadder quote and I have nothing against the Scots at all)
That's very true. I never thought of that before. Next time my bf says thank you or buys me flowers, he's going to get a slap in the face!
- Antwerp '06, Nijmegen '07, Werchter '07
this in particular:
The world is your urinal.
made me laugh!
but yes, in reality....men do get depressed, and they also have a higher success rate of attmepting suicide, as in, they usually do end up killing themselves ...so yea.........
so we all have our shite to bear. however, that list was great and i shall send it to my hubby for a good laugh.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
But everything else is pretty funny
Marriage kills womens sex drive. Just as you have em in your bed every night, they don't care any more
Shit breaks in your hands too easy.
All jobs suck after a few years.
We have to answer the question. Which question ?? Do you even have to ask which question, you know.......................
Does my arse look big in this ??
Sydney 14/02/2003
Sydney 07/11/2006
Sydney 18/11/2006
Sydney 22/11/2009
EV Sydney 18/03/2011
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Melbourne 24/01/2014
Sydney 26/01/2014
EV Sydney 13/02/2014