The Top 10 Game

189111314169

Comments

  • zenith
    zenith Posts: 3,191
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    impatience is a gift ........
  • _Crazy_Mary_
    _Crazy_Mary_ Posts: 1,299
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
    I really screwed that up. I really Schruted it.
  • I was diving...
    I was diving... Posts: 1,832
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
    64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
    I like our socks. I hear we make a fine sock. I always say, You might not love our records, but I think you'll like our socks. - Stoney G.

    http://www.myspace.com/ozbeachbum

    7/11/06 - Sydney 1
    18/11/06 - Sydney 3
    19/11/06 - Newcastle Baby!
  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
    64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
    65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • ozpjman
    ozpjman Posts: 872
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
    64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
    65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
    66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
    Stars walk the red carpet because they're famous - I walk the toilet paper because im the shit.
  • cory wrote:
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
    65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.

    GO CORY!!!!
    he who forgets will be destined to remember
  • vital5
    vital5 Posts: 5,486
    GO CORY!!!!
    haha i almost posted the same thing!
  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    GO CORY!!!!


    You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • vital5
    vital5 Posts: 5,486
    TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH

    1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
    2. Just Because .....
    3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
    4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
    5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
    6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
    7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
    8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
    9. Because they don't like Grits
    10. The South blows!
    11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
    12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
    13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
    14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
    15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
    16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
    17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
    18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
    19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
    20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
    21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
    22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
    23. dont even get me started.....
    24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
    25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
    26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
    27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
    28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
    29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
    30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
    31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
    32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
    33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
    34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
    35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
    36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
    37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
    38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
    39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
    40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
    41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
    42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
    43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
    44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
    45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
    46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
    47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
    48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
    49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
    50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
    51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
    52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
    53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
    54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
    55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
    56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
    57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
    58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
    59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
    60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
    61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
    62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
    63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
    64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
    65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
    66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
    67. Frankly my dears.... They don't give a damn!!
  • cory wrote:
    You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)


    awww shucks Cor... :o

    their accent is weird? You have heard us talk havent you!!
    he who forgets will be destined to remember
  • vital5
    vital5 Posts: 5,486
    cory wrote:
    You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)
    Yeah they say beer funny... wait a minute...! :eek:
  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    Aussie accents sound like someone pouring rays of the sun into my ear holes as dew gently slides down the middle of its caramel center. It makes me want to lick my own face.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • zenith
    zenith Posts: 3,191
    cory wrote:
    Aussie accents sound like someone pouring rays of the sun into my ear holes as dew gently slides down the middle of its caramel center. It makes me want to lick my own face.


    errr ... steve irwin isnt the only aussie voice youve heard then???
    impatience is a gift ........
  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    zenith wrote:
    errr ... steve irwin isnt the only aussie voice youve heard then???


    There's actually a real estate agent here in Jackson from Australia. He and his wife are both very nice, I always like when he calls me to look up a house. He even has G'Day Mate stickers on his vehicle for advertisement.

    Cool dude.

    I thought Steve Irwin spoke Aboriginie <--sp?
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • smithnic
    smithnic Posts: 1,565
    Aussie accents are damn cute.
    Go Get 'Em Tigers!
  • cory wrote:
    There's actually a real estate agent here in Jackson from Australia. He and his wife are both very nice, I always like when he calls me to look up a house. He even has G'Day Mate stickers on his vehicle for advertisement.

    Cool dude.

    I thought Steve Irwin spoke Aboriginie <--sp?

    HAha!! Thats gold. No the Aborigine people speak the same as us. :) unless they were bron 200 years ago.
    he who forgets will be destined to remember
  • smithnic wrote:
    Aussie accents are damn cute.

    Hi Nick. How are ya mate? Havent seen you round in ages.

    Got any Top 100's for our list? Its coming along nicely. Even Cory is hanging shit on himself :)
    he who forgets will be destined to remember
  • smithnic
    smithnic Posts: 1,565
    Hi Nick. How are ya mate? Havent seen you round in ages.

    Got any Top 100's for our list? Its coming along nicely. Even Cory is hanging shit on himself :)


    It has been awhile.
    It's like Cheers though, coming back where "everybody knows your name."
    Go Get 'Em Tigers!
  • smithnic
    smithnic Posts: 1,565
    Top 10 Reasons to always come back to the PIT:

    1. Latest news on the best band in the world
    2. Really great people who helped me through a really boring job
    3. Latest on some great recordings of excellent shows
    4. some Great people that I got a chance to meet on tour
    5. hillarity
    6. I don't feel like such a freak
    7. Other people who love the greatest band in the world
    8. Cute Aussie accents
    ...
    Go Get 'Em Tigers!
  • smithnic wrote:
    It has been awhile.
    It's like Cheers though, coming back where "everybody knows your name."

    or where everybody in here has no life and their best friends are usernames with typed words behind them!!

    i need to get out more! ;)
    he who forgets will be destined to remember