Corny pick up lines

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  • Courtesy of Futurama's Zap Brannigan:

    "I'm drawn to you like a fly to a seductive piece of dung."

    :D
    Smokey Robinson constantly looks like he's trying to act natural after being accused of farting.
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    May I read your shirt in Braille?
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    cutback wrote:
    so in trying to pick you up, he called you a cow....and you didn't go with him why? ;) :eek: :D
    see? yeah that is kinda what I thought...

    he later walked up to me and without even LOOKING at my eyes...I mean OBVIOUS tit-eyes he goes.. "oh my god I fucked that all up" and started to cry.

    so drunk, oh hell yeah.

    the funniest part was I was NOT drunk, most people there werent. hahahaha...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    see? yeah that is kinda what I thought...

    he later walked up to me and without even LOOKING at my eyes...I mean OBVIOUS tit-eyes he goes.. "oh my god I fucked that all up" and started to cry.

    so drunk, oh hell yeah.

    the funniest part was I was NOT drunk, most people there werent. hahahaha...

    what would have happened had you been drunk? :eek:




    "Did it hurt?? When you fell from heaven?"
  • Spunkie
    Spunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 7,095
    "I'd give up forever to touch you."
    I was swimming in the Great Barrier Reef 
    Animals were hiding behind the Coral 
    Except for little Turtle
    I could swear he's trying to talk to me 
    Gurgle Gurgle
  • Hartydog
    Hartydog Posts: 2,060
    It's not corny but one of my buddies once trotted out: "my face is leaving in 15 minutes and I want you on it"
    Boston 9-28-04, 5-24-06, 5-25-06, 5-17-10, 8-5-16, 8-7-16, 9-2-18, 9-4-18
    Ft Worth 9-15-23
    Hartford 5-13-06, 6-27-08, 10-25-13
    Mansfield, MA 6-30-08, 6-28-08, 7-2-03, 7-3-03, 7-11-03, 8-29-00, 8-30-00, 9-15-98, 9-16-98
    Worcester 10-15-13, 10-16-13
  • cutback wrote:
    May I read your shirt in Braille?
    AHAHAHAHAHAH :D


    oh am i going to have fun in school tomorrow :p
    I will be what i could be
    Once I get out of this town


    9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
  • Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin. :D
    I will be what i could be
    Once I get out of this town


    9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
  • Cosmo
    Cosmo Posts: 12,225
    Does anyone really think these actually work?
    You know what works for me? Honesty. Yeah, it sounds stupid... but if there is a gal I like... I tell her. It's really simple. If you like her hair or her eyes... just tell her.
    And yeah... the honesty only goes so far. I mean, I like tits and ass... but, I won't go up and tell her that because I'm not an idiot. I'll let her know about that much later in the relationship. From the start... there is always something, right guys? Her hair... eyes... smile... face...
    There is no secret 'Opening line' that unlocks the secrets of women. So, try a little honesty... it has done me well.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • seagoat2
    seagoat2 Posts: 241
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(
  • seagoat2 wrote:
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(

    "I'm artificial from the waist down, you insensitive bastard!"
    :p
    It's credible, because it's science! :D
    Smokey Robinson constantly looks like he's trying to act natural after being accused of farting.
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    seagoat2 wrote:
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(


    your story reminds me of this :D


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9SaKYFR6ms
  • seagoat2
    seagoat2 Posts: 241
    cutback wrote:
    your story reminds me of this :D


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9SaKYFR6ms

    That was about it & thanks for that - I needed a good laugh. Luckily his outfit wasn't that tacky but when he opened his mouth, it may have well been! The guy who commented on my jeans, well, I dunno, I think he was a "country" boy visiting Los Angeles, if you know what I mean....