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Corny pick up lines

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  • RolandTD20KdrummerRolandTD20Kdrummer Posts: 13,066
    Is that a sausage on your face, or are you just happy to see me?

    eh...maybe not...
    Progress is not made by everyone joining some new fad,
    and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
    over specific principles, goals, and policies.

    http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg

    (\__/)
    ( o.O)
    (")_(")
  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,769
    RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:
    Is that a sausage on your face, or are you just happy to see me?

    eh...maybe not...

    that one makes me hot!
  • StuffnJunkStuffnJunk Posts: 896
    guy - "Do you have your tickets"

    girl - "what tickets?"

    guy - "TO THE GUN SHOW!!!" (flexes bicep and kisses it)
    "I'll tell you what: If all I had was Pearl Jam, and I didn't have another band in the world, I would not be worried. Because in there is the essence of making great music. You don't have to use it all at once, but it's there." - Neil Young
  • OffHeGoes29OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    I'll quote the GZA on this one.

    "Relax.....as I soak you in my mentals"
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Rhinocerous Surprise wrote:
    "Do you like apples? How about I take you home and fuck the shit outta you? How do ya like them apples?"

    :D


    goddammit...why has NO ONE EVER USED THIS ONE ON ME????

    I would TOTALLY go with it...because that HAS to mean a good sense of humor.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • RolandTD20KdrummerRolandTD20Kdrummer Posts: 13,066
    tish wrote:
    that one makes me hot!


    Oh jeez... now you're making me hot!
    Progress is not made by everyone joining some new fad,
    and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
    over specific principles, goals, and policies.

    http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg

    (\__/)
    ( o.O)
    (")_(")
  • Rhinocerous SurpriseRhinocerous Surprise Posts: 4,423
    failedpersephone wrote:
    goddammit...why has NO ONE EVER USED THIS ONE ON ME????

    I would TOTALLY go with it...because that HAS to mean a good sense of humor.

    The only downside is that it's hard to keep a straight face when you're saying it. :p
    Smokey Robinson constantly looks like he's trying to act natural after being accused of farting.
  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,769
    RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:
    Oh jeez... now you're making me hot!

    That's a good one too.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    "If I milk you can i have a place in your stable?"

    he was very very drunk. and I still don't get it...I mean, the milk thing, duh...but seriously...I don't understand it. I just remembered this one
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    failedpersephone wrote:
    "If I milk you can i have a place in your stable?"

    he was very very drunk. and I still don't get it...I mean, the milk thing, duh...but seriously...I don't understand it. I just remembered this one


    so in trying to pick you up, he called you a cow....and you didn't go with him why? ;) :eek: :D
  • Rhinocerous SurpriseRhinocerous Surprise Posts: 4,423
    Courtesy of Futurama's Zap Brannigan:

    "I'm drawn to you like a fly to a seductive piece of dung."

    :D
    Smokey Robinson constantly looks like he's trying to act natural after being accused of farting.
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    May I read your shirt in Braille?
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    cutback wrote:
    so in trying to pick you up, he called you a cow....and you didn't go with him why? ;) :eek: :D
    see? yeah that is kinda what I thought...

    he later walked up to me and without even LOOKING at my eyes...I mean OBVIOUS tit-eyes he goes.. "oh my god I fucked that all up" and started to cry.

    so drunk, oh hell yeah.

    the funniest part was I was NOT drunk, most people there werent. hahahaha...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    failedpersephone wrote:
    see? yeah that is kinda what I thought...

    he later walked up to me and without even LOOKING at my eyes...I mean OBVIOUS tit-eyes he goes.. "oh my god I fucked that all up" and started to cry.

    so drunk, oh hell yeah.

    the funniest part was I was NOT drunk, most people there werent. hahahaha...

    what would have happened had you been drunk? :eek:




    "Did it hurt?? When you fell from heaven?"
  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,769
    "I'd give up forever to touch you."
  • HartydogHartydog Posts: 2,060
    It's not corny but one of my buddies once trotted out: "my face is leaving in 15 minutes and I want you on it"
    Boston 9-28-04, 5-24-06, 5-25-06, 5-17-10, 8-5-16, 8-7-16, 9-2-18, 9-4-18
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  • Drop The Leash 10Drop The Leash 10 Posts: 7,011
    cutback wrote:
    May I read your shirt in Braille?
    AHAHAHAHAHAH :D


    oh am i going to have fun in school tomorrow :p
    I will be what i could be
    Once I get out of this town


    9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
  • Drop The Leash 10Drop The Leash 10 Posts: 7,011
    Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin. :D
    I will be what i could be
    Once I get out of this town


    9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
  • CosmoCosmo Posts: 12,225
    Does anyone really think these actually work?
    You know what works for me? Honesty. Yeah, it sounds stupid... but if there is a gal I like... I tell her. It's really simple. If you like her hair or her eyes... just tell her.
    And yeah... the honesty only goes so far. I mean, I like tits and ass... but, I won't go up and tell her that because I'm not an idiot. I'll let her know about that much later in the relationship. From the start... there is always something, right guys? Her hair... eyes... smile... face...
    There is no secret 'Opening line' that unlocks the secrets of women. So, try a little honesty... it has done me well.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • seagoat2seagoat2 Posts: 241
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(
  • Rhinocerous SurpriseRhinocerous Surprise Posts: 4,423
    seagoat2 wrote:
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(

    "I'm artificial from the waist down, you insensitive bastard!"
    :p
    It's credible, because it's science! :D
    Smokey Robinson constantly looks like he's trying to act natural after being accused of farting.
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    seagoat2 wrote:
    These are prolly more stoopid than corny, but a guy came up to me in a dance club & said "Hey, Baby, do you want to shake it up? Obviously, english wasn't his first language & I didn't hold that against him, but really? "Hello" would've been easier. Another loser said to me once, after eyeing me up & down - "I really like the way you fill out those jeans"! Ewww!

    Huh? How does a girl reply to that? :-(


    your story reminds me of this :D


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9SaKYFR6ms
  • seagoat2seagoat2 Posts: 241
    cutback wrote:
    your story reminds me of this :D


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9SaKYFR6ms

    That was about it & thanks for that - I needed a good laugh. Luckily his outfit wasn't that tacky but when he opened his mouth, it may have well been! The guy who commented on my jeans, well, I dunno, I think he was a "country" boy visiting Los Angeles, if you know what I mean....
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