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Ladies, I Do Not Understand You

PittsburghPJPittsburghPJ Posts: 225
edited February 2009 in All Encompassing Trip
So, last Thursday, I finally get up the nerve to ask out this girl I've known for about a month. She seems real excited, we set up dinner for Sunday. I try to call her on Saturday, left a message...she never calls me back. Sunday morning she sends me a text, "I have a lot of work to do, sorry." I've tried to call her twice since then...she doesn't answer me, doesn't call back. Now, I've been turned down before, of course, but never just straight ignored. What the hell is that about? :roll:

"Is this Wilt Chamberlain?!?!...HAVE THE COURAGE TO SAY SOMETHING!"

I need me some PJ... :(
YNWA
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Comments

  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    hmmm... I seem to have the same issue with men. Some people just don't have the nerve to say "i don't like you".
    Just dropping off the face of the earth is pretty low, have some backbone! :roll: *sorry about the rant*
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • PittsburghPJPittsburghPJ Posts: 225
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:
    Just dropping off the face of the earth is pretty low, have some backbone!

    That's what I say.
    YNWA
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:
    Just dropping off the face of the earth is pretty low, have some backbone!

    That's what I say.
    I mean sure it sucks to not be liked, but I'd rather hear the words than have to guess. :evil: bleh. this dating thing sucks, no wonder i married so young! :roll:
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • PittsburghPJPittsburghPJ Posts: 225
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:
    Just dropping off the face of the earth is pretty low, have some backbone!

    That's what I say.
    I mean sure it sucks to not be liked, but I'd rather hear the words than have to guess. :evil: bleh. this dating thing sucks, no wonder i married so young! :roll:

    Right, exactly, that is what is driving me crazy about this situation. Why did she agree to go out in the first place? Why did she give me such a lame excuse? Is her plan to just ignore me until I never talk to her again? We seemed to have a lot of fun together...now this.
    YNWA
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    Right, exactly, that is what is driving me crazy about this situation. Why did she agree to go out in the first place? Why did she give me such a lame excuse? Is her plan to just ignore me until I never talk to her again? We seemed to have a lot of fun together...now this.
    I can't say I'll ever understand people who can't be honest. It's funny because a lot of them say it's because they don't wanna hurt other's feeling... but it's more a selfish thing, because they don't wanna BE THE ONE to hurt someone's feelings. I take those people and in my mind file them under the T category for TURDS. :|
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    Don't call again. She might really have a ton of work to do. My gf has been pulling 70-hour weeks since the new year started and can't spare a moment for anything. If this girl's a student, they have weird work flows. Or it's possible this chick got super wasted and skanky over the weekend and doesn't want to make you sloppy fourths or something. Or she just is spineless.

    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,767
    i think you have already wasted too much time thinking about this girl....thinking about this situation....and thinking about why she blew you off......


    forget about her...

    and move on to the next one.........

    just my humble opinion..........................................
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • HoltzmnHoltzmn Posts: 87
    PittsburghPJ wrote:

    Right, exactly, that is what is driving me crazy about this situation. Why did she agree to go out in the first place? Why did she give me such a lame excuse? Is her plan to just ignore me until I never talk to her again? We seemed to have a lot of fun together...now this.

    She probably agreed in the first place because she's too much of a wuss to be honest and say no. Obviously she plans on ignoring you and giving you lame excuses until you give up. Don't waste anymore time thinking about this chick, move on and find someone else.
  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    soulsinging wrote:
    Don't call again. She might really have a ton of work to do. My gf has been pulling 70-hour weeks since the new year started and can't spare a moment for anything. If this girl's a student, they have weird work flows. Or it's possible this chick got super wasted and skanky over the weekend and doesn't want to make you sloppy fourths or something. Or she just is spineless.

    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.

    she has time to fire off a text but cant take 5 minutes out of her precious day to tell him on the phone. fuck that!!
    i say forget about her. people are weak and suck. edit. some people.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    catefrances wrote:
    she has time to fire off a text but cant take 5 minutes out of her precious day to tell him on the phone. fuck that!!
    i say forget about her. people are weak and suck. edit. some people.
    exactly.... Some people have no class. :roll:
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • so-much-clearerso-much-clearer Posts: 303
    I think it's dumb that she said yes, but maybe she felt like she was put on the spot, or she was surprised by the way you felt and said yes automatically.

    Either way, probably nothing you can do to change her mind, sorry...
    I'll wait for an angel, but won't hold my breath
  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    Stalk her... it'll teach her a lesson :shock: just kidding of COURSE... but that's what happened to me. I used to do this shit when I was about 18 until there were two guys at the same time who wouldn't take ignorance for an answer... and both proceeded to stalk me for months... one well over a year (even though after about a week, I was bluntly honest with him) it got pretty scary. BUT I learned a well deserved lesson... it's a shitty way to treat people and I learned that if you just say 'no, I'm sorry' you're saving them a lot of time wondering what the fuck's going on so ultimately it's kinder.

    Anyway, forget about her... she's not worth another second of your time.
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    Had I not found this love with you
  • JaneNYJaneNY Posts: 4,438
    soulsinging wrote:
    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.

    This. ^^^^

    Accept the fact that she's changed her mind about hanging with you, get over it, and move on. You can't MAKE her contact you or want to be with you.
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  • DeLukinDeLukin Posts: 2,757
    I'd like to give you some advice, but I have too much work to do...
    I smile, but who am I kidding...
  • PittsburghPJPittsburghPJ Posts: 225
    JaneNY wrote:
    soulsinging wrote:
    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.

    This. ^^^^

    Accept the fact that she's changed her mind about hanging with you, get over it, and move on. You can't MAKE her contact you or want to be with you.

    Are you guys SURE that calling her one last time and leaving a voice mail professing my undying love won't win her back??????
    YNWA
  • PoncierPoncier Posts: 17,195
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    Are you guys SURE that calling her one last time and leaving a voice mail professing my undying love won't win her back??????
    It only works if you make her a nice pot of hasenpfeffer too.
    This weekend we rock Portland
  • Motha JudsonMotha Judson Posts: 104
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    So, last Thursday, I finally get up the nerve to ask out this girl I've known for about a month. She seems real excited, we set up dinner for Sunday. I try to call her on Saturday, left a message...she never calls me back. Sunday morning she sends me a text, "I have a lot of work to do, sorry." I've tried to call her twice since then...she doesn't answer me, doesn't call back. Now, I've been turned down before, of course, but never just straight ignored. What the hell is that about? :roll:

    "Is this Wilt Chamberlain?!?!...HAVE THE COURAGE TO SAY SOMETHING!"

    I need me some PJ... :(


    There is a lot of that going around....see my thread called "women".

    Stay strong bro....don't let it get to you. 8-)
  • Motha JudsonMotha Judson Posts: 104
    soulsinging wrote:
    Or it's possible this chick got super wasted and skanky over the weekend and doesn't want to make you sloppy fourths or something.


    Oh, this made me laugh....good one...shanky? Love it. :lol:
  • AmentsChickAmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    So Much Clearer wrote:
    I think it's dumb that she said yes, but maybe she felt like she was put on the spot, or she was surprised by the way you felt and said yes automatically.

    Either way, probably nothing you can do to change her mind, sorry...

    I hate to admit it, but I've done that before...agreed to a date when I wasn't really interested. I'm not saying it was the right thing to do...it's quite obnoxious and cowardly, but it did happen.
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • Cinnamon GirlCinnamon Girl Posts: 1,854
    Boo on her!! :evil:

    I'm guessing the same as most here; she was trying not to be hurtful to your face.

    This is why being single scares the shit out of me. Emotional games and assholes.

    Don't dwell. Move on. If she really is too busy, she'll call when she's not.
    05-10-06, 08-05-07, 06-14-08 , 08-12-08(EV), 06-11-09(EV), 06-12-09(EV), 08-21-09, 05-10-10, 09-11-11, 09-12-11, 07-16-13, 07-19-13, 10-12-13, 10-21-13, 10-22-13,
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    catefrances wrote:
    soulsinging wrote:
    Don't call again. She might really have a ton of work to do. My gf has been pulling 70-hour weeks since the new year started and can't spare a moment for anything. If this girl's a student, they have weird work flows. Or it's possible this chick got super wasted and skanky over the weekend and doesn't want to make you sloppy fourths or something. Or she just is spineless.

    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.

    she has time to fire off a text but cant take 5 minutes out of her precious day to tell him on the phone. fuck that!!
    i say forget about her. people are weak and suck. edit. some people.

    Texting takes a fraction of the time of a phone call... it's a one-way convo. If you call, people can try to draw you into convo and force you to be rude to get away. I have no qualms with text use.
  • bee_boybee_boy Posts: 384
    I love it when we get all over protective when it comes to fellow pit members
  • PittsburghPJPittsburghPJ Posts: 225
    Poncier wrote:
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    Are you guys SURE that calling her one last time and leaving a voice mail professing my undying love won't win her back??????
    It only works if you make her a nice pot of hasenpfeffer too.

    Shit, do you have a recipe I can use?
    YNWA
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    PittsburghPJ wrote:
    So, last Thursday, I finally get up the nerve to ask out this girl I've known for about a month. She seems real excited, we set up dinner for Sunday. I try to call her on Saturday, left a message...she never calls me back. Sunday morning she sends me a text, "I have a lot of work to do, sorry." I've tried to call her twice since then...she doesn't answer me, doesn't call back. Now, I've been turned down before, of course, but never just straight ignored. What the hell is that about? :roll:

    "Is this Wilt Chamberlain?!?!...HAVE THE COURAGE TO SAY SOMETHING!"

    I need me some PJ... :(

    Maybe she really does have a lot of work to do....
  • CJMST3KCJMST3K Posts: 9,722
    I think she would have called him back if she were interested. Sorry... she changed her mind, and did a very bad job of communicating it. Wasn't your fault! I agree that you should not call her again. She's got your number.
    ADD 5,200 to the post count you see, thank you. :)
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  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    soulsinging wrote:
    catefrances wrote:
    soulsinging wrote:
    Don't call again. She might really have a ton of work to do. My gf has been pulling 70-hour weeks since the new year started and can't spare a moment for anything. If this girl's a student, they have weird work flows. Or it's possible this chick got super wasted and skanky over the weekend and doesn't want to make you sloppy fourths or something. Or she just is spineless.

    Continuing to call will no change her mind. And if she's telling you straight and simply doesn't have time to chat on the phone, continuing to call will give the creepy clingy vibe.

    she has time to fire off a text but cant take 5 minutes out of her precious day to tell him on the phone. fuck that!!
    i say forget about her. people are weak and suck. edit. some people.

    Texting takes a fraction of the time of a phone call... it's a one-way convo. If you call, people can try to draw you into convo and force you to be rude to get away. I have no qualms with text use.

    and this is why im glad i dont have a cell phone. if you want to dump my arse you either have to be a man and actually speak to me to do it or you simple disappear like a snivelling gutter rat.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    catefrances wrote:
    soulsinging wrote:
    catefrances wrote:
    she has time to fire off a text but cant take 5 minutes out of her precious day to tell him on the phone. fuck that!!
    i say forget about her. people are weak and suck. edit. some people.

    Texting takes a fraction of the time of a phone call... it's a one-way convo. If you call, people can try to draw you into convo and force you to be rude to get away. I have no qualms with text use.

    and this is why im glad i dont have a cell phone. if you want to dump my arse you either have to be a man and actually speak to me to do it or you simple disappear like a snivelling gutter rat.

    You can't dump someone you never dated. The dude's never even been on a date with the girl.

    No, it's not cool to dump someone via text. But generally speaking, even if i CAN afford to take 5 minutes out of my precious day to call someone, I'd just as soon text if possible. I fucking hate people and I hate talking to them on the phone even more! :)
  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    soulsinging wrote:
    You can't dump someone you never dated. The dude's never even been on a date with the girl.

    No, it's not cool to dump someone via text. But generally speaking, even if i CAN afford to take 5 minutes out of my precious day to call someone, I'd just as soon text if possible. I fucking hate people and I hate talking to them on the phone even more! :)

    this is true. but my sentiment remains. ALL people should grow some cajones when it comes to treating people right. if you dont want to do something, or see someone, just say so. tis not that difficult. even me with my well known aversion to my fellow humans can manage this.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,767
    i dont understand ladies either.....

    thats because i dont pay attention to a single fucking word they have to say.............

    hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe........................
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • Thorns2010Thorns2010 Posts: 2,201
    SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:
    i dont understand ladies either.....

    thats because i dont pay attention to a single fucking word they have to say.............

    hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe........................

    That might be why they dislike you! :lol:

    Actually I don't know if they do or not.
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