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Rectal Exam From Hell

g under pg under p Surfing The far side of THE Sombrero Galaxy Posts: 18,200
edited September 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
Man I had my physical today which I paid for out of pocket and everything was fine till the rectal exam. I've had these in the past but TODAY my doc seemed like he was searching for gold back there. :(

I counted it was at least 17 SECONDS with his long fingers up, down and all around. Made me wince overtime but the good news it turned out it's all good.

Peace
*We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti

*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti

*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)


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Comments

  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    did ya have a smoke afterward? :p:D
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    g under p wrote:
    Man I had my physical today which I paid for out of pocket and everything was fine till the rectal exam. I've had these in the past but TODAY my doc seemed like he was searching for gold back there. :(

    I counted it was at least 17 SECONDS with his long fingers up, down and all around. Made me wince overtime but the good news it turned out it's all good.

    Peace

    I probably shouldn't have clicked on this thread while eating lunch. I'm sure you have a very nice rectum, but I kinda lost my appetite. :o
  • Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 13,327
    moooooooon river

    ever serve time doc?
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    Get_Right wrote:
    moooooooon river

    ever serve time doc?

    well mr babar, i don't find anything wrong with you

    well it's not for a lack of looking

    :D
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    wait...it sounds like you are complaining?
    I don't understand...it sounds like a nice easy intro session...

    OH!...I see, hard to get, you saucy gent!

    shoulda held out for dinner first. :D
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 13,327
    cutback wrote:
    well mr babar, i don't find anything wrong with you

    well it's not for a lack of looking

    :D
    breathe easy
    Yeah...breathe easy... Ahh!! Using the whole fist, Doc?!

    :D
  • rival.rival. Chicago Posts: 7,775
    did i say two fingers????? better make it three.
  • Shawn Smith CollectiveShawn Smith Collective Posts: 986
    g under p wrote:
    I had my...rectal exam... My doc seemed like...gold back there...his long fingers up, down and all around...me but[t]... It's good.

    Is this like a bizarro Danielle Steel novel or something?
    <a href="http://www.shawnsmithsinger.com">Shawn Smith</a> / <a href="http://www.thebandbrad.com">Brad</a&gt; / <a href="http://www.allhailthecrown.com">All Hail the Crown</a> / <a href="http://www.satchelpartnership.com">Satchel</a&gt;

    (Shawn Smith's official website, but not Thee Shawn Smith)
  • anothercloneanotherclone Posts: 1,688
    Maybe the doctor was looking for something he lost up there.
  • g under pg under p Surfing The far side of THE Sombrero Galaxy Posts: 18,200
    cutback wrote:
    did ya have a smoke afterward? :p:D

    Nice to have some laughter in the middle of the day huh. :)

    I would've love to have a smoke the island kind but I had a fricking headache.

    Peace
    *We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti

    *MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
    .....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti

    *The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)


  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    anotherclone wrote:
    Maybe the doctor was looking for something he lost up there.

    DR. Nick Riviera:

    "The knee bone's connected to the...something. The something's connected to the...red thing. The red thing's connected to my...wrist watch. Uh oh."
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

    https://www.createspace.com/3437020

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    http://earthtremors.blogspot.com/
  • Black DiamondBlack Diamond Posts: 25,107
    eyedclaar wrote:
    DR. Nick Riviera:

    "The knee bone's connected to the...something. The something's connected to the...red thing. The red thing's connected to my...wrist watch. Uh oh."

    LMAO!!! Thank you I needed that!

    BTW try a colonoscopy, habing a camera up your a$$ and them showing you the video is something that should be illegal.
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • g under pg under p Surfing The far side of THE Sombrero Galaxy Posts: 18,200
    Black Diamond wrote:
    LMAO!!! Thank you I needed that!

    BTW try a colonoscopy, habing a camera up your a$$ and them showing you the video is something that should be illegal.

    It's borderline pornagraphic but it saves lives though.

    Peace
    *We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti

    *MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
    .....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti

    *The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)


  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    g under p wrote:
    It's borderline pornagraphic but it saves lives though.

    Peace

    Just like real pornography... well, except for the borderline part.
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

    https://www.createspace.com/3437020

    http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000663025696

    http://earthtremors.blogspot.com/
  • SnakeSnake Posts: 2,605
    "Dr. Hartman raped me!"
    Pirates had democracy too.

    "Its a secret to everybody."
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    He has boldly gone where no man has gone before....
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • g under pg under p Surfing The far side of THE Sombrero Galaxy Posts: 18,200
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    He has boldly gone where no man has gone before....


    That was a good one. :D

    Peace
    *We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti

    *MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
    .....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti

    *The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)


  • Stone Is GodStone Is God Posts: 1,331
    "Paging Dr. Jellyfinger, Dr. Jellyfinger please report to exam room 3."
    I'll ride the wave where it takes me.
  • DanimalDanimal Posts: 2,000
    Hopefully you didn't feel both of his hands on your shoulders while this was going on.
    "I don't believe in PJ fans but I believe there is something, not too sure what." - Thoughts_Arrive


  • g under pg under p Surfing The far side of THE Sombrero Galaxy Posts: 18,200
    Danimal wrote:
    Hopefully you didn't feel both of his hands on your shoulders while this was going on.

    :D Stop it :D

    Peace
    *We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti

    *MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
    .....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti

    *The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)


  • JonnyPistachioJonnyPistachio Florida Posts: 10,219
    I hear banjo music
    Pick up my debut novel here on amazon: Jonny Bails Floatin (in paperback) (also available on Kindle for $2.99)
  • pearljamjenpearljamjen Posts: 13,578
    This thread made me smile! :p
  • WhiteMaleRatWhiteMaleRat Posts: 301
    Danimal wrote:
    Hopefully you didn't feel both of his hands on your shoulders while this was going on.

    "Look, no hands !!!"
    "This guy back here is giving me the ole one more....one more back to you buddy."

    - Mr. Edward Vedder 7/11/03


  • DanimalDanimal Posts: 2,000
    WhiteMaleRat wrote:
    "Look, no hands !!!"

    Haahhaahaha
    "I don't believe in PJ fans but I believe there is something, not too sure what." - Thoughts_Arrive


  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    Hey at least you didn't have a BM

    :eek:
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • WobbieWobbie Posts: 30,455
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    He has boldly gone where no man has gone before....

    hopefully! :D
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
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  • Black DiamondBlack Diamond Posts: 25,107
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    Hey at least you didn't have a BM

    :eek:

    Wow! I haven't heard BM since my last rectal exam.
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • sk8nshoot1sk8nshoot1 Posts: 722
    "If it feels like more than two fingers it's probably a dick..." Dave Attell
    1996: Randall's Island I, Hartford
    1998: MSG I, Hartford
    2000: Jones Beach I
    2003: Albany, MSG II, Mansfield II & III, Homdel
    2004: Boston (VFC) I & II
    2006: Albany, Hartford, Boston I and E. Rutherford I
    2008: MSG I & II, Hartford, Mansfield II (saw BostonLou in the FRONT ROW!!) EV-NYC II
    2010: Hartford
    2013 Worcester II, Hartford
    2016 Fenway I
    2018 Wrigley II, Fenway II
  • faceinthecloudsfaceintheclouds Posts: 1,739
    cutback wrote:
    did ya have a smoke afterward? :p:D
    sweet, lmao. smoke and to bed.
    Just, not enough.
    I need more.
    Nothing seems to satisfy.
    I said, I dont want it.
    I just need it.
    To breathe, to feel, to know Im alive.
  • aspoonfulweighsatonaspoonfulweighsaton Posts: 2,055
    I just like title of the thread. It's like as opposed to what? Those rectal exams that are sent directly from heaven above?

    :D
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