A question about children

vduboise

So I have a friend who just announced that he is having another child. This will be his seventh one. He just had a baby in January. He is 26 and all his children are under the age of 10. He has a low paying job, his wife does not work, and they are on public assistance.
When asked about having more children- his response is "God willing".

I know its not for me to decide if he should have more children- its a decision for him and his wife.
I congratulated him on the upcoming baby- but I wanted to say something to him- but I bit my tongue, and kept my "Another one" to myself.

But my question is this-
If your resources are very limited- and his is- Is it a detriment to the family to bring another one in?

Just putting the question out there

norm

your friend is very irresponsible....

vduboise

Yes he is.

He is very Christian and does not believe in contraception. I feel for his wife.

Lizard

cutback wrote:

your friend is very irresponsible....

and fertile!!!

norm

vduboise wrote:

Yes he is.

He is very Christian and does not believe in contraception. I feel for his wife.

if he that devout a christian, why are taxpayers paying for these kids that he thinks god provided him? (rhetorical ??)

Stone Is God

vduboise wrote:

But my question is this-
If your resources are very limited- and his is- Is it a detriment to the family to bring another one in?

Just putting the question out there

It's a detriment to my fucking paycheck. People that have 50 kids and live on PA drive me nuts.

reeferchief

Until you mentioned his wife I was begining to wonder how I hadn't heard about him before, a man giving birth to not one but 7 kids by the age of 26.:)

The fact his wife does'nt work didn't come as a surprise neither, are all 7 to her?

KosmicJelli

vduboise wrote:

So I have a friend who just announced that he is having another child. This will be his seventh one. He just had a baby in January. He is 26 and all his children are under the age of 10. He has a low paying job, his wife does not work, and they are on public assistance.
When asked about having more children- his response is "God willing".

I know its not for me to decide if he should have more children- its a decision for him and his wife.
I congratulated him on the upcoming baby- but I wanted to say something to him- but I bit my tongue, and kept my "Another one" to myself.

But my question is this-
If your resources are very limited- and his is- Is it a detriment to the family to bring another one in?

Just putting the question out there

I personally wouldn't... however it is said... "Go forth and multiply!"... omg I hope these people are good to their children!!!!

kenny olav

your friend might be a nice guy and all, but that's insane. if this were 1865, and he was getting a grant from the Homestead Act, it'd be different, but i'm assuming that's not the case...

vduboise

ok-

say... if you was his wife- and felt that you had enough- would you go on contraception without telling him?

He is a very strong believer in no birth control.

vduboise

reeferchief wrote:

Until you mentioned his wife I was begining to wonder how I hadn't heard about him before, a man giving birth to not one but 7 kids by the age of 26.:)

The fact his wife does'nt work didn't come as a surprise neither, are all 7 to her?

All 7 are her's. He is a very nice guy- a bit of a Bible beater.

vduboise

KosmicJelli wrote:

I personally wouldn't... however it is said... "Go forth and multiply!"... omg I hope these people are good to their children!!!!

They are good to their children, but how good can you be with 8 people in a small apartment?

For those with big families (4 or more children), how do you make it work? Any words of advice for him?

kenny olav

vduboise wrote:

ok-

say... if you was his wife- and felt that you had enough- would you go on contraception without telling him?

He is a very strong believer in no birth control.

that's a hard thing to keep a secret. if that how she feels, she should be honest. but if they choose to live by the bible on such strict terms, they're gonna have to deal with the consequence of their "blessings".

_Crazy_Mary_

I'm a firm believer in personal responsibility. People should not have children if they cannot afford them. If you can't pay the $5k hospital bill, don't get pregnant!
That said, there is nothing you can say or do for these people. The wifey cannot go on birth control in secret, she needs to talk to hubby about it. Maybe they could not have sex for the 3 days a month when she is at risk...

Trailer

_Crazy_Mary_ wrote:

I'm a firm believer in personal responsibility. People should not have children if they cannot afford them.

I agree

Medicated-Genius

reeferchief wrote:

Until you mentioned his wife I was begining to wonder how I hadn't heard about him before, a man giving birth to not one but 7 kids by the age of 26.:)

The fact his wife does'nt work didn't come as a surprise neither, are all 7 to her?

Oh she's workin alright! With six kids under the age of 10, and another on the way, that woman is workin her arse off.

To the OP, doesn't this guy know there are natural "christian" approved methods of birth control? Abstinence at key times, billings method, rhythm method etc?

GeorgeMcFly

See the movie Idiocracy.

Manofthepresenttense

tell him to cut his balls off

_

vduboise wrote:

ok-

say... if you was his wife- and felt that you had enough- would you go on contraception without telling him?

He is a very strong believer in no birth control.

Wait - so his wife doesn't want to have more kids but feels she can't use birth control because of him?

I think I would go on birth control without telling him. That said, no one knows this woman's situation well enough to judge whether she feels that this is a possible option for her. It would be tricky...

If she really felt strongly about not having another kid, it's also possible for her to have an abortion without telling him. (No, I'm not saying she should have an abortion or trying to start an abortion debate. I'm just saying that may be one option she has.)

blondieblue227

They must be catholic

I have a friend that’s catholic and I really resent her when she judges me for using birth control and for not wanting kids. I’m disabled. Do you realize how hard life would be for me if I got pregnant? I just want to slap her in the face.

edvedderrocks

what kind of life is he giving those children? It's hard enough to divide your attention between 2 kids, let alone 7! The older ones will become babysitters & start working when they are 14. I don't even think it's a good idea if they had money - that's just me, but...

I know someone who is very religious & gives half of his paycheck to church. He has a sixteen year old daughter (& a 4 year old) and has NO money saved for her for college. He says if she was meant to go to college, God will find hher a way to get there. Weird.