A question about children
vduboise
Posts: 1,937
So I have a friend who just announced that he is having another child. This will be his seventh one. He just had a baby in January. He is 26 and all his children are under the age of 10. He has a low paying job, his wife does not work, and they are on public assistance.
When asked about having more children- his response is "God willing".
I know its not for me to decide if he should have more children- its a decision for him and his wife.
I congratulated him on the upcoming baby- but I wanted to say something to him- but I bit my tongue, and kept my "Another one" to myself.
But my question is this-
If your resources are very limited- and his is- Is it a detriment to the family to bring another one in?
Just putting the question out there
When asked about having more children- his response is "God willing".
I know its not for me to decide if he should have more children- its a decision for him and his wife.
I congratulated him on the upcoming baby- but I wanted to say something to him- but I bit my tongue, and kept my "Another one" to myself.
But my question is this-
If your resources are very limited- and his is- Is it a detriment to the family to bring another one in?
Just putting the question out there
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He is very Christian and does not believe in contraception. I feel for his wife.
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if he that devout a christian, why are taxpayers paying for these kids that he thinks god provided him? (rhetorical ??)
It's a detriment to my fucking paycheck. People that have 50 kids and live on PA drive me nuts.
The fact his wife does'nt work didn't come as a surprise neither, are all 7 to her?
I personally wouldn't... however it is said... "Go forth and multiply!"... omg I hope these people are good to their children!!!!
say... if you was his wife- and felt that you had enough- would you go on contraception without telling him?
He is a very strong believer in no birth control.
All 7 are her's. He is a very nice guy- a bit of a Bible beater.
For those with big families (4 or more children), how do you make it work? Any words of advice for him?
that's a hard thing to keep a secret. if that how she feels, she should be honest. but if they choose to live by the bible on such strict terms, they're gonna have to deal with the consequence of their "blessings".
That said, there is nothing you can say or do for these people. The wifey cannot go on birth control in secret, she needs to talk to hubby about it. Maybe they could not have sex for the 3 days a month when she is at risk...
I agree
Oh she's workin alright! With six kids under the age of 10, and another on the way, that woman is workin her arse off.
To the OP, doesn't this guy know there are natural "christian" approved methods of birth control? Abstinence at key times, billings method, rhythm method etc?
Wait - so his wife doesn't want to have more kids but feels she can't use birth control because of him?
I think I would go on birth control without telling him. That said, no one knows this woman's situation well enough to judge whether she feels that this is a possible option for her. It would be tricky...
If she really felt strongly about not having another kid, it's also possible for her to have an abortion without telling him. (No, I'm not saying she should have an abortion or trying to start an abortion debate. I'm just saying that may be one option she has.)
I have a friend that’s catholic and I really resent her when she judges me for using birth control and for not wanting kids. I’m disabled. Do you realize how hard life would be for me if I got pregnant? I just want to slap her in the face.
I know someone who is very religious & gives half of his paycheck to church. He has a sixteen year old daughter (& a 4 year old) and has NO money saved for her for college. He says if she was meant to go to college, God will find hher a way to get there. Weird.
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These people must have started really young if he's 26 and has 7 kids. You'd think it would have been a reality check by now. :rolleyes:
I believe that a lot of people are very judgemental, including the OP. Yes, Christians tend to be the first pointed out in this grouping. Especially Catholics. Ironically, a hell of a lot of people are judgemental towards Catholics in this area. Not saying this gent is Catholic. But, I think you are an ass for thinking he can't have as many children as he wants. It's his business. Yep he's going to be strapped and work like a psycho for the rest of his life. Guess what? Butt the F out. It's not your business.
The same people who would say butt the F out of the bedroom if it fits their agenda (Gay rights/abortion rights) are the same f'ing people who are judging people for having too many kids. Butt the F out. Be f'ing consistent.
Anyway, It's not like they are living below the substinance level. Let it go.
Yes he knows there are other methods- but everything is "God willing"- if God wants him to have more kids, then he will.
I did not say that he could/not have as many children as he wants.
My question is that is it fair to have a lot of children when you don't have the means for it?
that's just fucked...
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I have a friend who's 27 and he and his wife have 6 young children. He works his ass off, but his children are very happy, healthy, kind, and smart. His wife stays home with the kids. (I doubt she could afford to go to work.) He finally just got a vasectomy.
Working so much to support them, does he get to spend time with the kids? Not just a hello and what not...
I think so. He's usually with the kids when I see him. He's really my brother's friend, so I don't know all the details. His kids are freakin' adorable though! And his wife was happy to have so many, so no harm there.