First year university...and 2 of my friends are engaged!! Your thoughts plz?

bovy_j
bovy_j Posts: 1,008
edited February 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
It just feels so weird to have two good friends of mine engaged. I don't even think either of them are nineteen yet. I was just wondering what your thoughts were on something like this.
I'm just not knowing what to think right now....I'm enjoying university and just having a good time! Not thinking of marriage!
Thanks guys/gals!
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • rival.
    rival. Chicago Posts: 7,775
    my advice? don't jump on the engagement bandwagon.

    enjoy single college life while you can!
  • Brain of J.Lo
    Brain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    bovy_j wrote:
    It just feels so weird to have two good friends of mine engaged. I don't even think either of them are nineteen yet. I was just wondering what your thoughts were on something like this.
    I'm just not knowing what to think right now....I'm enjoying university and just having a good time! Not thinking of marriage!
    Thanks guys/gals!

    Well, only they can know if it's the right thing for them or not...

    But yeah, just keep enjoying your life as it is right now! :D
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    my opinion.....they will be divorced by 25.... they haven't even started they're lives and they want to get married? bad idea...
  • rearviewmiror
    rearviewmiror Posts: 894
    Married at 23 divorced at 30.

    19 is too young. It all end in tears.

    Or I am just bitter.
    9/7/98, 8/3/00, 9/4/00, 4/15/03, 7/1/03, 9/28/04, 9/29/04, 5/24/06, 5/25/06, 6/17/08, 6/22/08, 6/28/08, 6/30/08, 5/17/10, 10/15/13, 10/16/13.
  • ladygooddiva
    ladygooddiva Posts: 4,169
    it is a bit young in my eyes but it is everybodys own choice i am engaged since 4 years and i have my ten years this year ...
  • bovy_j
    bovy_j Posts: 1,008
    Brain of J.Lo wrote:
    Well, only they can know if it's the right thing for them or not...

    But yeah, just keep enjoying your life as it is right now! :D

    And that's completely what I'm doing...one of my friends ended up dropping out of university because of this. My other one says she is going to stay in university to become a pharmacist...yet they think they want to have the wedding in two years.
    It's all just crazy!
  • Brain of J.Lo
    Brain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    bovy_j wrote:
    yet they think they want to have the wedding in two years.
    It's all just crazy!

    They'll probably get over it. ;)

    I knew a lot of people that got engaged right out of high school (or even during! :eek:) and hardly any of them actually ended up marrying. People get too excited to grow up!
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    I think that's a horrible idea.

    but they may not end up getting married. some guy on my floor in college got engaged first year and they broke up like 6 months later. At that age it might not even mean anything.
  • NY PJ1
    NY PJ1 Posts: 9,533
    suckas
  • PearlsGirl
    PearlsGirl Posts: 257
    bovy_j wrote:
    It just feels so weird to have two good friends of mine engaged. I don't even think either of them are nineteen yet. I was just wondering what your thoughts were on something like this.
    I'm just not knowing what to think right now....I'm enjoying university and just having a good time! Not thinking of marriage!
    Thanks guys/gals!

    i am totally with you! during my first year at uni, so many of my high school friends were getting married! we were just 18/19 years old! and now they have three kids each or something like that. it's so freakin' young! totally shocking that kids that young are thinking of marriage. I'm 23 now and it still freaks me out. ah! You enjoy uni, it's probably some of the best times you'll have in life, and be careful on who you decide to date. don't get serious too fast, I guess that's why these kids are now getting married.
    Don't let the world bring you down, not everyone here is that fucked up and cold. Remember why you came and while you're alive, experience the warmth before you grow old.

    Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.
  • gobrowns19
    gobrowns19 Posts: 1,447
    Like one poster said, only they really know.

    I have a friend who is 18 and getting married next weekend. Good guy and mature beyond his years. [but so immature in other ways, lol.]
    Happiness is only real when shared
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    PearlsGirl wrote:
    i I'm 23 now and it still freaks me out.

    I'm 30 and I am way, way too young to get married.
  • Brain of J.Lo
    Brain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    gobrowns19 wrote:
    Like one poster said, only they really know.

    I have a friend who is 18 and getting married next weekend. Good guy and mature beyond his years. [but so immature in other ways, lol.]

    Very good point. Everyone is different, and just because something is no longer the social norm, that doesn't mean it's necessarily wrong.

    Good luck to your friend. :)
  • PearlsGirl
    PearlsGirl Posts: 257
    GreenTeaDisease wrote:
    I'm 30 and I am way, way too young to get married.

    haha, i'm pretty sure i'll be feeling the exact same way in 6 years!
    Don't let the world bring you down, not everyone here is that fucked up and cold. Remember why you came and while you're alive, experience the warmth before you grow old.

    Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    PearlsGirl wrote:
    haha, i'm pretty sure i'll be feeling the exact same way in 6 years!

    I really think 40-50 is the "ideal" time to get married.
  • blackredyellow
    blackredyellow Posts: 5,889
    Obviously it's their lives and they can do what they want...

    But in my opinion, it's too young... Going into your first year of college, there are so many things changing in your life, and so many choices ahead to make. I just think that it takes a little time to get an idea of what/where you want to go with your life, and being engaged could cloud your judgment a bit.
    My whole life
    was like a picture
    of a sunny day
    “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
    ― Abraham Lincoln
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    blackredyellow wrote:
    Obviously it's their lives and they can do what they want...

    But in my opinion, it's too young... Going into your first year of college, there are so many things changing in your life, and so many choices ahead to make. I just think that it takes a little time to get an idea of what/where you want to go with your life, and being engaged could cloud your judgment a bit.

    what I don't get about people getting married so young and in college and everything, is like, what benefit does it have? I mean what does it offer over just being boyfriend and girlfriend at that point? I'm not even sure there's a ton of benefits (except for taxes and stuff) when you're older. Especially if you're in college, you're (hopefully) not going to be trying to have kids for several years anyway.
  • acoustic guy
    acoustic guy Posts: 3,770
    If a couple want to get married they should have to live together first for two years. ANd they should have to go to marriage counseling.I mean before they are married. Then, if all is well get married.
    My wife and I are great buy the first year was really hard. I dated many girls and some for along time but I never lived with them. My wife was the first.
    Get em a Body Bag Yeeeeeaaaaa!
    Sweep the Leg Johnny.
  • Brain of J.Lo
    Brain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    acoustic guy wrote:
    If a couple want to get married they should have to live together first for two years. ANd they should have to go to marriage counseling.I mean before they are married. Then, if all is well get married.
    My wife and I are great buy the first year was really hard. I dated many girls and some for along time but I never lived with them. My wife was the first.

    I think that's a great idea. That's exactly what we did. You have to know what you're getting into! ;):D
  • blackredyellow
    blackredyellow Posts: 5,889
    GreenTeaDisease wrote:
    what I don't get about people getting married so young and in college and everything, is like, what benefit does it have? I mean what does it offer over just being boyfriend and girlfriend at that point? I'm not even sure there's a ton of benefits (except for taxes and stuff) when you're older. Especially if you're in college, you're (hopefully) not going to be trying to have kids for several years anyway.

    I agree... I can't understand people who get married in college either. Engagement I can sort of understand... it's the love of your life (at least at that time), and you want to commit to them, blah blah blah.... I don't agree with it, but I understand and it can be easily undone. But marriage is such a big step.
    My whole life
    was like a picture
    of a sunny day
    “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
    ― Abraham Lincoln

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