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how do you get a social life??

CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
edited October 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
OK oddly pathetic question I know....but...
how do you obtain a social life???
I was with my husband from 17 on and Married at 21.
So I never really did the whole bar scene, and now that I'm ready to have a LIFE...all my friends are married! go figure;)

the question remains how does one a quire a social life?

PLEASE don't make THAT much fun of me....I know i'm pathetic...lol.
"I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
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Comments

  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,775
    Meet people doing activities you enjoy.
  • wolfbearwolfbear Posts: 3,965
    Not a strange question at all! We moved and it was hard to meet people. Volunteering did it for me. Also, just taking to people, as strange as that sounds, really helps. Good luck. :)
    "I'd rather be with an animal." "Those that can be trusted can change their mind." "The in between is mine." "If I don't lose control, explore and not explode, a preternatural other plane with the power to maintain." "Yeh this is living." "Life is what you make it."
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    tish wrote:
    Meet people doing activities you enjoy.
    ahh that's it.... i don't do activities:D
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    You can still go out with your friends even though they are married. When you do, you might try to go to places where you'll meet other people.

    You can meet people through other friends and relatives.

    You can create a social life with your friends from work.

    You can make more friends from message boards.

    Uh... that's all I've got right now. :) I'll admit, it has been harder for me since I got out of college.
  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,775
    Try something new then... what classes does the local rec centre offer that you may enjoy? I signed up for boxfit and guitar this fall.

    When friends ask me out, I say yes. When at a dinner/bbq, I approach people and network.

    It was pretty hard to get the ball rolling on a new social life that didn't start with, "Hey you wanna smoke a joint", but it can be done.
  • 12345AGNST112345AGNST1 Posts: 4,906
    Wait till pearl jam goes on tour...get tickets...go to the show...drink a little....talk to anyone, thery're all there for PJ.


    problem solved!
    5/28/06, 6/27/08, 10/28/09, 5/18/10, 5/21/10
    8/7/08, 6/9/09
  • xscorchoxscorcho Posts: 409
    i just moved again and here is what i did....

    i moved to a country where i dont speak the language so i found a forum for english speakers in that city and they hold meetups so i went to one.. introduced myself and now i have friends... from there you just meet up with them outside to do things besides drink. i met up with one girl yesturday and we made tacos... i miss mexican food!

    also, you can join a class...

    i also think work is a great place to meet people....

    you have to be willing to introduce yourself to people and ask them to do things.....

    good luck getting a social life:)
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    I don't want to advocate drug abuse, but there is no better conversation enhancer than oxycontin. Lots of people say that coke is a great conversational drug, but that really wasn't the case for me. It just makes me feel very mellow and I usually would rather listen to music than talk to anybody.

    Speed will definitely make you talk, but the problem is that you'll be talking so much that people will start to slowly walk away from you while you stand there yacking away, totally oblivious to what is going on.

    Oxycontin is a great balance of wanting to conversate and still being able to coherently conversate so that the people you are conversating with don't realize that you're stoned out of your mind.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • xscorchoxscorcho Posts: 409
    sponger wrote:
    but there is no better conversation enhancer than oxycontin.
    or you can just be brave and talk to new people without using illegal drugs (assuming you dont have a script for it)....
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    sponger wrote:
    I don't want to advocate drug abuse, but there is no better conversation enhancer than oxycontin. Lots of people say that coke is a great conversational drug, but that really wasn't the case for me. It just makes me feel very mellow and I usually would rather listen to music than talk to anybody.

    Speed will definitely make you talk, but the problem is that you'll be talking so much that people will start to slowly walk away from you while you stand there yacking away, totally oblivious to what is going on.

    Oxycontin is a great balance of wanting to conversate and still being able to coherently conversate so that the people you are conversating with don't realize that you're stoned out of your mind.
    thanks for the advice...but since i'm coming out of a marriage to an addict, that might not be the way for me...:) thanks though.
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    xscorcho wrote:
    or you can just be brave and talk to new people without using illegal drugs (assuming you dont have a script for it)....

    It's not a matter of bravery. It's a matter of interest.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • xscorchoxscorcho Posts: 409
    sponger wrote:
    It's not a matter of bravery. It's a matter of interest.
    interest in talking to new people? the OP is already interested.. she just isnt sure how to meet people.
  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

    the question remains how does one a quire a social life?


    by not hanging out on a bands message board 20 hours a day.
    Peace, Love.

    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • ForestBrainForestBrain Posts: 460
    Go about your life and talk to people. And...join clubs (books, movies, those kinds). You would be quite surprised at who you can meet, and they would have the same interests.
    When life gives you lemons, throw them at somebody.
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    the wolf wrote:
    by not hanging out on a bands message board 20 hours a day.

    That's a good start
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    sponger wrote:
    I don't want to advocate drug abuse, but there is no better conversation enhancer than oxycontin. Lots of people say that coke is a great conversational drug, but that really wasn't the case for me. It just makes me feel very mellow and I usually would rather listen to music than talk to anybody.

    Speed will definitely make you talk, but the problem is that you'll be talking so much that people will start to slowly walk away from you while you stand there yacking away, totally oblivious to what is going on.

    Oxycontin is a great balance of wanting to conversate and still being able to coherently conversate so that the people you are conversating with don't realize that you're stoned out of your mind.
    LOL wtf is this mess?? :p

    Pills won't give you a social life. They'll give you stomach probz.

    I agree w/ the similar interests tek.
  • pretextpretext Posts: 1,294
    When I moved to my town 4 1/2 years ago, I headed straight to the local coffee shop (NOT Starbucks). Just hanging out I got to know folks and integrate into the community. If you can find a social hub like that, especially in a small town, I'd highly recommend spending some time there.

    Oh, and the only drug you'd need to consume is caffeine. ;)
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    xscorcho wrote:
    interest in talking to new people? the OP is already interested.. she just isnt sure how to meet people.

    There's a difference between being interested in meeting new people and being interested in people.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • LONGRDLONGRD Posts: 6,036
    Sadly, social life gets harder and harder to maintain as you get older.

    I'm not to comfortable with this adulthood lifestyle yet.
    Just too many damn responsibilities and not enough time.

    Sometimes I wish I was Peter Pan... :o
    PJ- 04/29/2003.06/24,25,27,28,30/2008.10/27,28,30,31/2009
    EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
  • RolandTD20KdrummerRolandTD20Kdrummer Posts: 13,066
    you much unleash the techno viking from within...

    become the techno viking...
    Progress is not made by everyone joining some new fad,
    and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
    over specific principles, goals, and policies.

    http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg

    (\__/)
    ( o.O)
    (")_(")
  • CHANGEinWAVESCHANGEinWAVES Posts: 10,169
    RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:
    you much unleash the techno viking from within...

    become the techno viking...
    I already do that in the home improvement store aisles....didn't u see my profile;)
    "I'm not present, I'm a drug that makes you dream"
  • Slip KidSlip Kid Posts: 1,175
    try ebay.
    I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
  • PJamGrunge10PJamGrunge10 California Posts: 596
    Slip Kid wrote:
    try ebay.


    It can be done. I've seen an air guitar on there before.

    It was hand crafted too, so there is quality stuff there.
    Stone Gossard...riffmeister extraordinaire!

    I am a man, I am advanced.....I am the first man to borrow Stone's leather pants!
  • Slip KidSlip Kid Posts: 1,175
    PJamGrunge10 wrote:
    It can be done. I've seen an air guitar on there before.

    It was hand crafted too, so there is quality stuff there.

    I wonder if I put my clues in a box, people would would buy it?

    so when they say "get a clue" sure enough, i'm selling em.
    I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
  • allmyrivalsallmyrivals Posts: 228
    CHANGEinWAVES wrote:
    OK oddly pathetic question I know....but...
    how do you obtain a social life???
    I was with my husband from 17 on and Married at 21.
    So I never really did the whole bar scene, and now that I'm ready to have a LIFE...all my friends are married! go figure;)

    the question remains how does one a quire a social life?

    PLEASE don't make THAT much fun of me....I know i'm pathetic...lol.

    Umm ....i don't understand why you can't have a social life with your married friends? Did your friends stop having a life after they were married? Why is it a problem if your friends are married.......did their social lives end when they got married? If so, then that's more pathetic than any question you have asked. Sounds like you have a social life.....but you don't want to be the only one there single. But why do you care? Your in a healing process right now. And if your friends don't have time to help you heal cause they are married, then thats crazy pathetic as well.

    In the end i hope you find what your looking for .....just take it day by day. People come and go.....your always gonna meet new people. Without even trying :)
    EVENFLOW PSYCHO #0031
    WHAAHYEAH!!
  • elmerelmer Posts: 1,683
    sponger wrote:
    I don't want to advocate drug abuse, but there is no better conversation enhancer than oxycontin. Lots of people say that coke is a great conversational drug, but that really wasn't the case for me. It just makes me feel very mellow and I usually would rather listen to music than talk to anybody.

    Speed will definitely make you talk, but the problem is that you'll be talking so much that people will start to slowly walk away from you while you stand there yacking away, totally oblivious to what is going on.

    Oxycontin is a great balance of wanting to conversate and still being able to coherently conversate so that the people you are conversating with don't realize that you're stoned out of your mind.
    :D I think you ARE advocating drug abuse mate.
  • SpunkieSpunkie i come from downtown. Posts: 6,775
    Spend less time in PC land and more time out in the real world.
  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    allmyrivals wrote:
    Umm ....i don't understand why you can't have a social life with your married friends? Did your friends stop having a life after they were married? Why is it a problem if your friends are married.......did their social lives end when they got married? If so, then that's more pathetic than any question you have asked. Sounds like you have a social life.....but you don't want to be the only one there single. But why do you care? Your in a healing process right now. And if your friends don't have time to help you heal cause they are married, then thats crazy pathetic as well.

    In the end i hope you find what your looking for .....just take it day by day. People come and go.....your always gonna meet new people. Without even trying :)
    it's a fact that quite a few people have to give up their social life when they get married... saving for the wedding or for a house or kids or whatever. They usually have something to save for so are less available than they used to be.
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • Black DiamondBlack Diamond Posts: 25,107
    Heineken Helen wrote:
    it's a fact that quite a few people have to give up their social life when they get married... saving for the wedding or for a house or kids or whatever. They usually have something to save for so are less available than they used to be.

    And.... We hate single people. Who wants to hear about fabulous lives and getting some when then we have to go home and change poopie diapers :D
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • petrocspetrocs Posts: 4,342
    organize a PJ party at your new place and all of us locals or near locals can come over :)
    Shows:
    9/24/96 MD. 9/28/96 Randalls. 8/28-29/98 Camden. 9/8/98 NJ. 9/18/98 MD. 9/1-2/00 Camden. 9/4/00 MD. 4/28/03 Philly. 7/5-6/03 Camden. 9/30/05 AC.
    10/3/05 Philly. 5/27-28/06 Camden. 6/23/06 Pitt. 6/19-20/08 Camden. 6/24/08 MSG. 8/7/08 EV Newark, NJ. 6/11-12/09 EV Philly, PA. 10/27-28-30-31/09 Philly, PA., 5/15/10 Hartford,5/17/10 Boston, 5/18/10 Newark, 5/20-21/10 MSG
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