Cottage Cheese should totally be refrigerated...and other obvious signs of stupidity

edvedder913

so i wonder if there's some sort of tie between pearl jam fans and being retarded with folding the fitted sheet

norm

edvedder913 wrote:

so i wonder if there's some sort of tie between pearl jam fans and being retarded with folding the fitted sheet

the only person i've ever seen fold a fitted sheet is my mom......and she has no clue who pj are....:p

MattCameronKicksButt

failedpersephone wrote:

Here is one of mine:
I licked a hot iron - to test if it was hot enough...I don't even know what the hell I was going for with that one...I just was talking on the phone -and trying to iron my skirt...and I was waiting for the iron to heat up...and then...I licked it...

and duh. it burned my freaking tongue.

Well lets hope that if and when we get to meet in March that we take one of the guys with us, otherwise we'll end up lost in he backstreets of London or something.
I've never licked an iron but I've done things like leave a drink by the laptop and thought 'that's silly but, nah! I won't knock it over'. :mad:

I know someone who put half a bottle of washing up liquid in the washing machine and was then surprised to see that the kitchen floor was later covered in bubbles. :rolleyes:

the wolf

a friend of mine got really sick once. his lips were chapped for weeks, finally one day while shaving with a electric razor, he thought he could take the dead skin off his lips with his razor.

lets just say , that it did not go well.

comebackwoman

One sunny summer day I fell asleep on the beach while wearing my sunglasses and woke up with a nice raccoon mask. I had to walk around like that for weeks

Fifthelement

When I was eight or so, I put my tongue on a metal bar . . . in February . . . in Canada. Needless to say, I walked home with my tongue hanging out of my mouth and a trail of blood about six blocks long chronicling my journey and my stupidity.

failedpersephone

Fifthelement wrote:

When I was eight or so, I put my tongue on a metal bar . . . in February . . . in Canada. Needless to say, I walked home with my tongue hanging out of my mouth and a trail of blood about six blocks long chronicling my journey and my stupidity.

THAT REALLY HAPPENS????

I dunno wasn't raised around snow - I thought it was a joke! so your saliva isn't hot enough to melt your tongue free??

GraySaturday

hahahaha.. I can't believe you licked an iron!! holy hell!

I live in Chicago and most streets here run on a grid. Even number on a NORTH/SOUTH street are always on the WEST side of the street, Odd number on the EAST side. And so on...

SO... that being said.. My boss is selling her home and looking for new homes constantly, and cannot remember what I told her about houses being on what side of the street. She wants her back yard to face a certain way, so she asks me EVERY time what way it faces... so thats dumb in itsself, but it gets WAY dumber...

So the other day, she says to me, I found a perfect house, its 1260. So I say, its it on a N/S street, or E/W? and she's like, does that matter?? (Uh yes!!! ugh!) So she comes back and tells me it is N/S and I'm like, okay well... and before I can talk she says "So let me try this out... 1260.. ends in 0, and 0 is sometimes an even number but mostly odd.... So I am confused because I don't remember when it is odd vs. even" And I'm like "WTF????" and She's like.. "okay its odd right???" and I was like "What the hell when is 0 odd?" and she's like, "Well I don't know, is it even??" and I'm like, "Uh yeah, its always even." So she looks at me like I am blowing her mind, so I say "Well its 1260, what is 60/2?" And she's like "ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm....welll...... uhhhh...."

and I'm like.. "30!!!!!!!!!" and she gets all flustered and yells "I didn't major in math, JESUS!!!!!"



HAHAHAHA..

RolandTD20Kdrummer

I went to put gas in a gas can once but I left the yellow siphon still inside by mistake...(took it out earlier siphoning gas from another car though I left it out for some reason)...anyhow....never forget do this, as the gas erupted violently right into my face going in both my eyes and into my mouth. I immediately brought the back of my hand up to protect my eyes out of instinct and broke the glasses I was wearing. Getting gasoline generously shot into your eyes stings like bloody murder. Sat there spitting hunched over for like 2 minutes holding the pump blinded in pain, so I could eventually see enough to walk to the booth to get the key to the washroom and pour water into my eyes for a good 10 minutes. Bad scene.

MattCameronKicksButt

GraySaturday wrote:

hahahaha.. I can't believe you licked an iron!! holy hell!

I live in Chicago and most streets here run on a grid. Even number on a NORTH/SOUTH street are always on the WEST side of the street, Odd number on the EAST side. And so on...

SO... that being said.. My boss is selling her home and looking for new homes constantly, and cannot remember what I told her about houses being on what side of the street. She wants her back yard to face a certain way, so she asks me EVERY time what way it faces... so thats dumb in itsself, but it gets WAY dumber...

So the other day, she says to me, I found a perfect hourse, its 1260. So I say, its it on a N/S street, or E/W? and she's like, does that matter?? (Uh yes!!! ugh!) So she comes back and tells me it is N/S and I'm like, okay well... and before I can talk she says "So let me try this out... 1260.. ends in 0, and 0 is sometimes and even number but mostly odd.... So I am confused because I don't remember when it is odd vs. even" And I'm like "WTF????" and She's like.. "okay its odd right???" and I was like "What the hell when is 0 odd?" and she's like, "Well I don't know, is it even??" and I'm like, "Uh yeah, its always even." So she looks at me like I am blowing her mind, so I say "Well its 1260, what is 60/2?" And she's like "ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm....welll...... uhhhh...."

and I'm like.. "30!!!!!!!!!" and she gets all flustered and yells "I didn't major in math, JESUS!!!!!"



HAHAHAHA..

I wish that story were shorter so that I could put it in my sig. That really is one of the funniest posts I've ever read but then I don't understand your grid system either so I guess I'm laughing at my own stupidity too.

GraySaturday

MattCameronKicksButt wrote:

I wish that story were shorter so that I could put it in my sig. That really is one of the funniest posts I've ever read but then I don't understand your grid system either so I guess I'm laughing at my own stupidity too.

hahahaha.. she was so confused for so long, and I made fun of her for hours.. she made me promise not to tell anyone.. but when I left I called everyone I knew.. hahahaha..

MattCameronKicksButt

GraySaturday wrote:

hahahaha.. she was so confused for so long, and I made fun of her for hours.. she made me promise not to tell anyone.. but when I left I called everyone I knew.. hahahaha..

*Note to self. When GraySaturday says something about Chicago grid systems, just nod and smile politely*.

Someone once asked me if I wanted to put a pound in for the Grand National and I said 'nah, I hate football'.

GraySaturday

Oooh I have another one.. haha..

When I was explaining to my mom about how my Lasik surgery went, I was telling her about how I can't touch my eyes for a while, and how they are really dry and she says:

"That sucks.. you'll have to wear your glasses for a while since you can't touch your eyes to put your contacts in"


hahahaha.. Atleast she caught herself and was like, wow, I am such a moron!!!

acoustic guy

As a kid I used to sneak into my sisters room and use her hair gel, mousse etc.. One time I did it and i felt bad b/c i always use her stuff. So I went downstairs and said "hey Steph, please don't be mad at me but I used your mousse". She looks at me in a really strange way and then laughs. "Uh Leo, I don't have any mousse." I said yea you do, in fornt of your mirror. She said that IS mousse, but its NAIR MOUSSE!!!!!

Holy Shit! I ran up into the shower and washed it out. Thank God only some of my hair fell out. :(

GraySaturday

acoustic guy wrote:

As a kid I used to sneak into my sisters room and use her hair gel, mousse etc.. One time I did it and i felt bad b/c i always use her stuff. So I went downstairs and said "hey Steph, please don't be mad at me but I used your mousse". She looks at me in a really strange way and then laughs. "Uh Leo, I don't have any mousse." I said yea you do, in fornt of your mirror. She said that IS mousse, but its NAIR MOUSSE!!!!!

Holy Shit! I ran up into the shower and washed it out. Thank God only some of my hair fell out. :(

hahaha.. classic!!

acoustic guy

GraySaturday wrote:

Oooh I have another one.. haha..

When I was explaining to my mom about how my Lasik surgery went, I was telling her about how I can't touch my eyes for a while, and how they are really dry and she says:

"That sucks.. you'll have to wear your glasses for a while since you can't touch your eyes to put your contacts in"


hahahaha.. Atleast she caught herself and was like, wow, I am such a moron!!!

Hey did you start that new job yet?

GraySaturday

acoustic guy wrote:

Hey did you start that new job yet?

Nope April 28th I had to give a boat load of notice at my current job..

Fifthelement

failedpersephone wrote:

THAT REALLY HAPPENS????

I dunno wasn't raised around snow - I thought it was a joke! so your saliva isn't hot enough to melt your tongue free??

Yep it really happens. Usually if you pour warm water on the contact surface you can come away less injured. However, there was no one around so I had to rip my tongue away. Still painful to think about.

Outshyned

So the electricity is out.. The tv, computer and lights dont work. Why not listen to the radio, right?? right? lol (The radio that's plugged into the wall as well mind you.) I caught myself trying this before lol.

Or have you ever spilled something, and while leaning over to clean it up with said something still under your arm only spilled more of it?

Or searched everywhere for something that is literally right in your hand?

I've frozen my lip to a metal park toy before too when i was a kid!

That cottage cheese thing was really gross....That is actually scary on a few levels. That lady could actually be feeding others!

Did anyone hear about the robber who was told by employees that only the manager (who wasn't there) could access the safe..........So the robber leaves 2 phone numbers to reach him at when the manager returns?????
They called this guy and he actually came back lol.
That guy should be locked up,, geeze he could be driving a car or walking down the street by himself or something lmbo.

laaaa

-Os

PJPixie

Fifthelement wrote:

Yep it really happens. Usually if you pour warm water on the contact surface you can come away less injured. However, there was no one around so I had to rip my tongue away. Still painful to think about.

My son did that about 2 weeks ago with a popsicle. His poor little tongue actually bled :(