Millions of people spend millions of dollars every year to have kids. I know we have spent the better part of our life savings to do so (we are building it back up, though, we're debt free ex. house)
I know this is a little off the point, but please take heed:
Infertility is one of the most humiliating and heartbreaking things most people will ever deal with. With that in mind, if you run into someone who does not have children, please do not say:
1. Why dont you have kids yet?
2. Isn't it time you started a family?
3. When are you having kids?
If you know they are having trouble, please do not say:
1. Well, the way you get pregnant is you try harder! (Haha, I'm so clever.)
2. You do know HOW to get pregnant, right?
3. If you just stop worrying about it, it'll happen.
4. You could always adopt.
comments like these make us want to smack you. and we are probably on high dose meds, so it is likely we might smack you.
i knelt and emptied the mouth of every PUG around...
Millions of people spend millions of dollars every year to have kids. I know we have spent the better part of our life savings to do so (we are building it back up, though, we're debt free ex. house)
I know this is a little off the point, but please take heed:
Infertility is one of the most humiliating and heartbreaking things most people will ever deal with. With that in mind, if you run into someone who does not have children, please do not say:
1. Why dont you have kids yet?
2. Isn't it time you started a family?
3. When are you having kids?
If you know they are having trouble, please do not say:
1. Well, the way you get pregnant is you try harder! (Haha, I'm so clever.)
2. You do know HOW to get pregnant, right?
3. If you just stop worrying about it, it'll happen.
4. You could always adopt.
comments like these make us want to smack you. and we are probably on high dose meds, so it is likely we might smack you.
good points
The best use of Life is Love.
The best expression of Love is Time.
The best time to Love is Now.
Actually, it's not as bad as it could be. I think we're showing some restraint and thought, and it's not completely reactionary.
As someone who's posted reactionarily I could be wrong
There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
1) The person is READY to have the child. Therefore let's assume this person WANTS a child and the time is right, has thought about it for a long time, knows what having a child means (all other expenses, sleepless nights, etc), is in a stable relationship/marriage - ie all the thoughts and consideration a couple would go through when talking about having a child together.
2) Having this child this person WANTS now, would also mean she could get a grant, knowing damn well all the implications of studying whilst being a parent/partner.
First of all, Priority is given to bringing a child into a loving and caring family. Would this person still try for a kid even if there was no grant and let nature take it's course? Would waiting the few years it would take to complete her studies and start a career make a difference? Questions like these need to be answered sincerely by the person wanting this child. If the time is NOW and everything is 'in place' to have a child, and there is the bonus of a grant, I don't see it being such a big, nasty thing. If the ONLY purpose of the child is to get money, then that's wrong.
SPEEDY...you are to much. I knew that comments that would fly, I wasn't worried about it.
As I already stated, people today do in fact have kids for all the wrong reasons and then in turn get a bonus, for say, being a single parent. I'm not saying EVERYONE does that, but it's known that some people just don't try hard enough to NOT get pregnant.
I on the other hand, take all steps to avoid being a statistic. I am not in any financial situation or living situation to have a child right now. I want to finish school and get my degree and work for about a year full time before I do anything. I also want to try and get my own place, as we (we as in my boyfriend and I) rent right now. I also want to enjoy my last year in my 20's.
I have had people say "why don't you have a kid, it could help you in so many ways" I don't see how it could help, other than I wouldn't have to pay much for school at all, get a bigger tax break, etc. I have no way to pay for child care. We live with my boyfriends 10 year old, and day care is a pain in the ass. I should say, after school and summer care.
I was just trying to spark a conversation and I see that again, AET hasn't surprised me.
Ah well........
Opinions are like assholes, everyones got one.
"do gay midgets come out of the cupboard"
~CreedDisease~
Millions of people spend millions of dollars every year to have kids. I know we have spent the better part of our life savings to do so (we are building it back up, though, we're debt free ex. house)
I know this is a little off the point, but please take heed:
Infertility is one of the most humiliating and heartbreaking things most people will ever deal with. With that in mind, if you run into someone who does not have children, please do not say:
1. Why dont you have kids yet?
2. Isn't it time you started a family?
3. When are you having kids?
If you know they are having trouble, please do not say:
1. Well, the way you get pregnant is you try harder! (Haha, I'm so clever.)
2. You do know HOW to get pregnant, right?
3. If you just stop worrying about it, it'll happen.
4. You could always adopt.
comments like these make us want to smack you. and we are probably on high dose meds, so it is likely we might smack you.
I was only jivin'.
"I don't believe in PJ fans but I believe there is something, not too sure what." - Thoughts_Arrive
Take a look at our world today. Women and GIRLS have kids for the wrong reasons and yet they don't KNOW what the wrong reasons are. I'm willing to say that my option A could qualify as being a wrong answer, but I'm aware of it.
I love my sister to death, she had a baby and she hasn't worked in over a year, she lives off the system and I hate it. I can't believe she is my sister sometimes. Did she have him so she didn't have to work, probably not, but is she doing it anyway...YEP!
To me you only have a baby if you want one. Not for financial gain, or to get welfare or get child support from the father. Babies are not tools.
I have had people say "why don't you have a kid, it could help you in so many ways" I don't see how it could help, other than I wouldn't have to pay much for school at all, get a bigger tax break, etc. I have no way to pay for child care. We live with my boyfriends 10 year old, and day care is a pain in the ass. I should say, after school and summer care.
I was just trying to spark a conversation and I see that again, AET hasn't surprised me.
Ah well........
These people saying this to you are insane. And if you have a 10 year old living with you - you know this. It is a TON of responsibility and a selfless act to be a parent. Please do NOT listen to them - what they are saying is rather ignorant (don't mean to offend).
and yes, the AET you need to give EVERY MINOR DETAIL. I find that I defend myself a lot on here.
hmm, I don't think I would ever have a kid because I thought it would help me out financially...I'd feel like a bum doing that. If I ever have a kid it'll be because I want to have a family and be a parent.
I am going to have HUNDREDS of kids just so I can re-enact The Wizard Of Oz.
You gave me the best laugh of the day!
There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
You honestly expected people to be all "yeah guuuurrrrlll, go 'head 'n get yo ass knocked up! Get dem gov'ment checks! shiiiiiiit!"?
if i didnt know better i would say this was a jab at black people, that you were trying to sound like the little black girls that go on the talk shows.
but there is no way that is what you were doing because...........
well it would just be ignorant on your part wouldnt it?
it would also in a way be sad and disgusting.
so its a good thing thats not what you were doing here.
Peace, Love.
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
if i didnt know better i would say this was a jab at black people, that you were trying to sound like the little black girls that go on the talk shows.
but there is no way that is what you were doing because...........
well it would just be ignorant on your part wouldnt it?
it would also in a way be sad and disgusting.
so its a good thing thats not what you were doing here.
Good job mister clever!
That's exactly what I was doing. It's not ignorant... just funny.
I have dogs instead of children... I'd rather ruin my carpet than my life.
That's exactly what I was doing. It's not ignorant... just funny.
i guess. its stereo typing though. usually shit like that is only funny if you are around people that really know you. and we here do not. so it comes of racist and ignorant.
if thats not you, well...........good.
BTW, is your singnatue "just funny" too?
Peace, Love.
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
i guess. its stereo typing though. usually shit like that is only funny if you are around people that really know you. and we here do not. so it comes of racist and ignorant.
if thats not you, well...........good.
BTW, is your singnatue "just funny" too?
Stereotypes have to come from somewhere!
You can take it how you want, though.
And my signature is just true.
I have dogs instead of children... I'd rather ruin my carpet than my life.
I know you said that you don't want to get into the cost of raising the kid, but I think you kinda have to when considering premise A. I'm not sure that you could afford it, given the costs. Am I wrong about this?
Comments
Millions of people spend millions of dollars every year to have kids. I know we have spent the better part of our life savings to do so (we are building it back up, though, we're debt free ex. house)
I know this is a little off the point, but please take heed:
Infertility is one of the most humiliating and heartbreaking things most people will ever deal with. With that in mind, if you run into someone who does not have children, please do not say:
1. Why dont you have kids yet?
2. Isn't it time you started a family?
3. When are you having kids?
If you know they are having trouble, please do not say:
1. Well, the way you get pregnant is you try harder! (Haha, I'm so clever.)
2. You do know HOW to get pregnant, right?
3. If you just stop worrying about it, it'll happen.
4. You could always adopt.
comments like these make us want to smack you. and we are probably on high dose meds, so it is likely we might smack you.
7/5/98 dallas, 10/14/00 houston, 10/15/00 houston, 10/17/00 dallas, 4/5/03 san antonio, 4/6/03 houston, 6/9/03 dallas, 10/8/04 kissimmee
good points
The best expression of Love is Time.
The best time to Love is Now.
I'm never as good as when you're there.........
As someone who's posted reactionarily I could be wrong
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
yeah your correct it seems like evryone is trying to be civil we just need to be reminded every once in a while ......
1) The person is READY to have the child. Therefore let's assume this person WANTS a child and the time is right, has thought about it for a long time, knows what having a child means (all other expenses, sleepless nights, etc), is in a stable relationship/marriage - ie all the thoughts and consideration a couple would go through when talking about having a child together.
2) Having this child this person WANTS now, would also mean she could get a grant, knowing damn well all the implications of studying whilst being a parent/partner.
First of all, Priority is given to bringing a child into a loving and caring family. Would this person still try for a kid even if there was no grant and let nature take it's course? Would waiting the few years it would take to complete her studies and start a career make a difference? Questions like these need to be answered sincerely by the person wanting this child. If the time is NOW and everything is 'in place' to have a child, and there is the bonus of a grant, I don't see it being such a big, nasty thing. If the ONLY purpose of the child is to get money, then that's wrong.
Ah yes, I hadn't thought of that. When I say "we" I ment my friends and I who talk about this very subject.
My mistake.
"do gay midgets come out of the cupboard"
~CreedDisease~
10/27/06
As I already stated, people today do in fact have kids for all the wrong reasons and then in turn get a bonus, for say, being a single parent. I'm not saying EVERYONE does that, but it's known that some people just don't try hard enough to NOT get pregnant.
I on the other hand, take all steps to avoid being a statistic. I am not in any financial situation or living situation to have a child right now. I want to finish school and get my degree and work for about a year full time before I do anything. I also want to try and get my own place, as we (we as in my boyfriend and I) rent right now. I also want to enjoy my last year in my 20's.
I have had people say "why don't you have a kid, it could help you in so many ways" I don't see how it could help, other than I wouldn't have to pay much for school at all, get a bigger tax break, etc. I have no way to pay for child care. We live with my boyfriends 10 year old, and day care is a pain in the ass. I should say, after school and summer care.
I was just trying to spark a conversation and I see that again, AET hasn't surprised me.
Ah well........
"do gay midgets come out of the cupboard"
~CreedDisease~
10/27/06
I was only jivin'.
To me you only have a baby if you want one. Not for financial gain, or to get welfare or get child support from the father. Babies are not tools.
These people saying this to you are insane. And if you have a 10 year old living with you - you know this. It is a TON of responsibility and a selfless act to be a parent. Please do NOT listen to them - what they are saying is rather ignorant (don't mean to offend).
and yes, the AET you need to give EVERY MINOR DETAIL. I find that I defend myself a lot on here.
You honestly expected people to be all "yeah guuuurrrrlll, go 'head 'n get yo ass knocked up! Get dem gov'ment checks! shiiiiiiit!"?
ouch.
yeah i know but i'm just tired of seeing children being thought of as nothing more than a pet....
everyones a comedian this afternoon.
The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
if i didnt know better i would say this was a jab at black people, that you were trying to sound like the little black girls that go on the talk shows.
but there is no way that is what you were doing because...........
well it would just be ignorant on your part wouldnt it?
it would also in a way be sad and disgusting.
so its a good thing thats not what you were doing here.
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
Good job mister clever!
That's exactly what I was doing. It's not ignorant... just funny.
i guess. its stereo typing though. usually shit like that is only funny if you are around people that really know you. and we here do not. so it comes of racist and ignorant.
if thats not you, well...........good.
BTW, is your singnatue "just funny" too?
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
Stereotypes have to come from somewhere!
You can take it how you want, though.
And my signature is just true.
maybe your folks should have thought of owning a pet.
but hell, then i wouldnt be having so much fun talking with you.
its all good.
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
The cleverness just doesn't stop with you, does it!
who's trying to be clever?
it was just a observation thats all.
"To question your government is not unpatriotic --
to not question your government is unpatriotic."
-- Sen. Chuck Hagel
as if they have them saved up and just wait for the moment.........