I have been in a restroom when this woman that works in an office down the hall came in there and started going "OH my oh nooo OH Dear God! Uhhhh...oh no..noooo...*sniffle* oh..oh Excuse me oh no...uh oh!" the excuse me line was when I asked her if everything was alright...
all of that was accompanied by a LOT of very loud "dirt bomber" booming farts...and some lighter wet and squishies...
I was so embarrassed and sad for her...she sounded so upset about what whas coming out of her butt.
I think she was burping at the same time.
squishes!!!!!!!!!! i almost spit out my water.....hahaha
I woke up this morning feeling bloated with gas
I knew it was time for a load to pass
so I grabbed my cigarettes
brewed some bean
headed off to the latrine
while singing this song
Chorus
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
2nd verse:
Last night is total blur
Too many shots with a fugly girl
Taco bell wrappers in my bed
Swore I’d never drink and then eat
At that place again
Must exorcise the demon
Or I won’t last long
Off to the stall to sing my song
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
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I have been in a restroom when this woman that works in an office down the hall came in there and started going "OH my oh nooo OH Dear God! Uhhhh...oh no..noooo...*sniffle* oh..oh Excuse me oh no...uh oh!" the excuse me line was when I asked her if everything was alright...
all of that was accompanied by a LOT of very loud "dirt bomber" booming farts...and some lighter wet and squishies...
I was so embarrassed and sad for her...she sounded so upset about what whas coming out of her butt.
I think she was burping at the same time.
i somehow knew you wouldn't be far away from this thread!
Last night is total blur
Too many shots with a fugly girl
Taco bell wrappers in my bed
Swore I’d never drink and then eat
At that place again
Must exorcise the demon
Or I won’t last long
Off to the stall to sing my song
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
Last night is total blur
Too many shots with a fugly girl
Taco bell wrappers in my bed
Swore I’d never drink and then eat
At that place again
Must exorcise the demon
Or I won’t last long
Off to the stall to sing my song
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
i'm diggin' this tune you have here...although i'm singing it like molly hatchet's 'flirtin' with disaster'. and if you're taking requests...how about a verse about 'i gambled and lost'
It's threads like these that make the pit so damn awesome...
I have a buddy (who will go unidentified as he posts on here...) who can do things to a toilet you couldn't imagine. At his old work, he would go to OTHER PEOPLE'S FLOORS to do his business. Then return to his office on his floor. Truly a sick fuck...
As a sidenote, he wants to start a website called awaydumps.com or something like that. Basically a datebase of good toilets to use in public.
Thanks again for this thread!
Try this.... http://www.urinal.net I can't check it from work but it has ones from all over the world. The best was Afganistan and Cairo was pretty bad, too.
"If you're not living on the edge you're taking up too much room."
Gambling=a taxation on stupidity.
Remember, you can walk anywhere, as long as you have the time.
i somehow knew you wouldn't be far away from this thread!
well this happened like 3 years ago and I STILL turn a little pink when i have to see this woman in her office! hahahahaa
She is also solely responsible for my "phony bathroom meltdown" that I reenact in club bathrooms. (I hate clubs.) I like to see how fast I can clear the bathroom...I have found that if I make realistic fart sounds and bang the sides of the stall and then groan with fear and whimper a little...it only takes 3-5 minutes before all the little cha-cha girlz are out of the mirror line...
and now I can fix my lipstick and check that my bewbs are firmly in their cups.
That being said, I have come across a great many floaters in my office bathrooms...and once there was a smearing...that kinda scared me.
girls are dirty and gross. :(
IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
Last night is total blur
Too many shots with a fugly girl
Taco bell wrappers in my bed
Swore I’d never drink and then eat
At that place again
Must exorcise the demon
Or I won’t last long
Off to the stall to sing my song
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
3rd verse:
As it turned out
They were several smaller poos
the kind that splash ya when they land
moistening the dingleberry left behind
but other than that to my success
when i wiped i found no mess
a 1 wiper is a sign of good things ahead
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
Comments
squishes!!!!!!!!!! i almost spit out my water.....hahaha
2nd verse:
Last night is total blur
Too many shots with a fugly girl
Taco bell wrappers in my bed
Swore I’d never drink and then eat
At that place again
Must exorcise the demon
Or I won’t last long
Off to the stall to sing my song
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
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i somehow knew you wouldn't be far away from this thread!
This is the refrain for PJ's 2008 Christmas Single!!!
The song title is "We are all full of Shit"
Gambling=a taxation on stupidity.
Remember, you can walk anywhere, as long as you have the time.
http://www.ryanmontbleauband.com/
http://www.myspace.com/jessedee
great take on country lyrics
off to the stall to sing my song....lol
ohhhh i needed this laugh today........
i'm diggin' this tune you have here...although i'm singing it like molly hatchet's 'flirtin' with disaster'. and if you're taking requests...how about a verse about 'i gambled and lost'
Try this.... http://www.urinal.net I can't check it from work but it has ones from all over the world. The best was Afganistan and Cairo was pretty bad, too.
Gambling=a taxation on stupidity.
Remember, you can walk anywhere, as long as you have the time.
http://www.ryanmontbleauband.com/
http://www.myspace.com/jessedee
She is also solely responsible for my "phony bathroom meltdown" that I reenact in club bathrooms. (I hate clubs.) I like to see how fast I can clear the bathroom...I have found that if I make realistic fart sounds and bang the sides of the stall and then groan with fear and whimper a little...it only takes 3-5 minutes before all the little cha-cha girlz are out of the mirror line...
and now I can fix my lipstick and check that my bewbs are firmly in their cups.
That being said, I have come across a great many floaters in my office bathrooms...and once there was a smearing...that kinda scared me.
girls are dirty and gross. :(
As it turned out
They were several smaller poos
the kind that splash ya when they land
moistening the dingleberry left behind
but other than that to my success
when i wiped i found no mess
a 1 wiper is a sign of good things ahead
Mornin' coffee and a cigarette too
nothing feels better than a big ol' poo
http://seanbriceart.com/
Gambling=a taxation on stupidity.
Remember, you can walk anywhere, as long as you have the time.
http://www.ryanmontbleauband.com/
http://www.myspace.com/jessedee
Women are gross! everything is all smeary and the no flushing thing...oh and they dont always wash their hands!!!
GROSS!!!
never eat at a potluck people.
Rude
Lol, I agree
Another habit says its long overdue
Another habit like an unwanted friend
I'm so happy with my righteous self
What a pig!
Sorry about that.
Lol!
Another habit says its long overdue
Another habit like an unwanted friend
I'm so happy with my righteous self