I wonder if soldiers use metaphor.

DopeBeastie
DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
edited April 2006 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
Comparing war to a divorce?
Armament to psychic boundaries?
Schrapnel to insults, flung in heat?

Do fishes know it's night time in the deep?
Does Calliope really ever sing?

Do plums wish they were kisses?
Does smoke think it's a girl?
Walking home and fading out
slowly, in a happy dream?
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • EvilToasterElf
    EvilToasterElf Posts: 1,119
    More, we need more of this one. For the love of carrots in finsbury park, and the gods of phish continue.
  • justam
    justam Posts: 21,415
    PastaNazi wrote:
    Does smoke think it's a girl?
    Walking home and fading out
    slowly, in a happy dream?

    This is my favorite part! :)
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • olderman
    olderman Posts: 1,765
    she's got a way with words.. soft and hard, evoking while provoking.. :)
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    I wonder if soldiers use metaphor, comparing
    war to their first divorce. Their armor to restraining orders.
    Schrapnel to the insults, (he used to fling in heat, you know, that fucking tramp is such a ho.)

    Does a cold steel blade through skin, muscle, and organ ~
    a broken chest plate, triple bypass feel
    like the first time you couldn't keep it real?
    And that he's leaving you for someone else... healthier?

    Do fishes know it's night time in the deep?
    Does Calliope really ever sing or sleep?
    Is the cat in the sunny window stretching
    and purring just like me beneath his round smile?

    Do plums wish they were kisses?
    Does smoke think it's a girl?
    Walking home and fading out
    slowly, in a happy dream?




    there's more, evil... and thanks, j. i think i'll need to read more poetry to make it any longer, lol... ack! cheers to each
  • olderman
    olderman Posts: 1,765
    viloent, metallic cacaphony,
    dream induced collage of the sea,
    in fruition a whispered dream

    nice work rp from nm
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    and a lil beaut from you, too, o-man :D



    loveit!
  • EvilToasterElf
    EvilToasterElf Posts: 1,119
    I wonder if pharoahs ever loved?
    Passing edicts to those whose lives were less than numbers,
    just a cold mass, a lifeless dough
    they called their domain.
    How much time does a man-god have for love,
    designing a coffin so elaborate as to consume
    an entire life.
  • olderman
    olderman Posts: 1,765
    consuming is the word,
    spirits clayed the earthen world,
    stunned by lasers,
    shed as snakes skins thin.

    holding fast the scream
    lassos ring the necks
    some bastard cow..

    she is not allowed.

    felled as one deplored,
    the true ain't bored,
    as a distance sigh sounds,
    circles, yes surrounds,
    like bats in caves up down,
    is this more like me?
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    EvilToasterElf wrote:
    I wonder if pharoahs ever loved?
    Passing edicts to those whose lives were less than numbers,
    just a cold mass, a lifeless dough
    they called their domain.
    How much time does a man-god have for love,
    designing a coffin so elaborate as to consume
    an entire life.


    duude... very nice
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    olderman wrote:
    consuming is the word,
    spirits clayed the earthen world,
    stunned by lasers,
    shed as snakes skins thin.

    holding fast the scream
    lassos ring the necks
    some bastard cow..

    she is not allowed.

    felled as one deplored,
    the true ain't bored,
    as a distance sigh sounds,
    circles, yes surrounds,
    like bats in caves up down,
    is this more like me?


    a truant finds home



    very nice, also, sir :) love the short and abrupt english end...
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    PastaNazi wrote:
    Do fishes know it's night time in the deep?
    Does Calliope really ever sing?

    Do plums wish they were kisses?
    Does smoke think it's a girl?
    Walking home and fading out
    slowly, in a happy dream?
    There is a book of Neruda poetry "Book of Questions." It's incredible. Your words here remind me of it.

    http://www.coppercanyonpress.org/catalog/dsp_bookDetail.cfm?Book_ID=1153

    Here's my contribution:
    Do shoes smile in the afternoon?
    Has the tree kissed the fence, today?
    When the sun sets does it erase all lines?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    Here's a contribution in the spirit of war:

    When blood flows does it say goodbye to the bullet?
    Why is freedom laced in ill fitting boots?
    Why is John the dearest one?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Being Enlightened
    Being Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    Questions, questions, questions... :)

    Does a whisper make a sound if it falls on deaf ears?
    When I close my eyes, do my surroundings become invisible or disappear?
    Does a nocternal creature call day, night and night, day?

    Hmmm, and war....:(

    If I kill in a time of war, am I still not a murderer?
    Countries are lines that divide. If we fight for our country, are we fighting for further divisions?
    Fighting for peace? or Fighting for piece?
    Holy war?
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    Do holy wars wear wings of gauze?
    If pieces of us lay hidden in foreign soil, are we expatriots?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    ahh... yes... very nice. i like the Neruda questions, bib. but i like these questions, too.

    My poem above means to poke fun of mushy poets, myself included... kind of bringing horror into a perspective based in "reality". These questions on war keep in that spirit. Can we do the same in love and happiness? lol... should we?


    :D
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    Love and happiness questions:

    is true love backwords or forwards?
    is truth loved backwords or forwards?
    when the soul mates what is produced?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • DopeBeastie
    DopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    Can soul mates get divorced?
    What if only one soul believes it's found its mate?
    Can a soul stalk? Is it creepy or endearing?

    How does true love become false?
  • Being Enlightened
    Being Enlightened Posts: 5,746
    Is love true if it's based on lies?
    If love is blind, does that mean it has a better sense of smell?
    If you give give all your love away, is there any left for you?
    If money doesn't buy happiness, then why the hell does going to the amusement park cost so gawd damned much? :D
    If money doesn't buy happiness, then wtf am I still working for? :p;)
    If I was happy living in a cardboard box, would you look and see the smile in my eyes or would you pity me?
    Forget your perfect offering, there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    Is love in a hurry?
    Is sex divided?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird
  • Ms. Haiku
    Ms. Haiku Washington DC Posts: 7,390
    Why do red roses love candy?
    why do street corners introduce?
    There is no such thing as leftover pizza. There is now pizza and later pizza. - anonymous
    The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math - The Mincing Mockingbird

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