the shoebox

suedesuede Posts: 247
i have your silverware...
your underwear...
a box of you...
is in my room.

save me...
it's scary...
all these things...
laugh at me.

your dishes...
your kisses...
i was not...
one of your wishes.

a box of you...
is in my view...
pictures of you...
pictures of you...

copyright 2003 kNb/suedecrush
Post edited by Unknown User on
«134

Comments

  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I have dishes of you to give to her
    she wanted plates and other tableware
    but you gave her gates to pass through
    classes to matriculate and late passes
    when she couldn't wait to find out when
    the date could be....she's just a she
    giver her time....and rhymes....
    and boxes full of tissues
    with designs
    and boxes full of yous and other stuff
    take her to the turf and give her rein
    she will disdain you lest you crest the waves of mishfall
    where she'll leave you weave you leave you crestfallen
    stolen bought and bartered
    lest you bite her garter
    she'll have you bite her bit
    don't take no shit
    from her
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    you have dishes and i have dishes, too.
    one of many things i never knew.
    but i'll take those dishes you have for me to give her,
    even though i know i'll never see her.
    i bought her paper plates and paper dreams,
    now my Heart is bursting open at the seams.
    no glasses to practice her throwing crashes,
    just paper cups and paper dreams,
    now can you see?
    these paper cups can't hold the weight of water.

    she's just a she, and i'm just a he.
    all themore reason for her to leave.
    i gave her time,
    and this IS that rhyme.
    i really miss you,
    i need more tissues,
    i have some issues.
    this shoebox is heavy,
    like lead in my belly.
    i took her for a drive out in the rain,
    we built a sandcastle...
    and destroyed it the same day.
    .........

    thanks for that ISN :)
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    she dreams of you...on sunlit mornings
    and burns things at breakfast, cursing
    not knowing that the kites
    she flew last night
    were built by you....
    you drove thru deserts
    and made a trip to timbuktu
    with her but then she wanted
    katmandu....a new you
    a different you...the same one
    that she knew....she wanted
    the desert to be her house...
    and the beach to be her bed
    you swallowed lead and bullets and ore
    she swore and threw your stupid love away
    she prays that she'll find herself
    and washes delft...
    dreaming of China in the morning
    she fills cups of you
    you fill cups of mourning...
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    she doesn't dream of me,
    not anymore.
    she still sees all the things that i never did see.
    the mornings
    well, they're always grey,
    and rainy,
    perfect weather for burning if you ask me...
    though she was good at burning the bisquick.
    i can't keep up with you or your kites,
    maybe because i didn't sleep at all tonight.
    but you made me feel...
    something...
    something good...
    like you understand...
    that i'm not alone...
    that you know how it feels when a home is never really...
    a Home.

    i painted her in Blue once, okay, twice...
    kinda reminds me of the time i built that kite.
    i got lost in Fenton,
    with all these sentences,
    never forming a complete thought.
    and i drove in the rain,
    for days and days,
    alone...in October...

    she never wanted a new me,
    never even wanted the old.
    i wish it was true...
    what you've written,
    but it's not.
    unless it's you...
    that was her,
    but it's not.

    she wanted a house, up on hill...
    up north, here in Michigan...
    off to the side, dirt road...
    you know how it goes.
    two cats in the window,
    dog in the yard.
    i was never part of that picture.

    yeah, she threw my stupid Love away,
    and what did i do?
    i just wrote of the way two birds sway...
    in the middle of the ocean...all day.

    she never did find herself,
    but she found him,
    not too far from where she last left him.
    you know the story...
    the one about the guy that didn't want her.
    i'm fairly certain those stories all end up the same now.

    i got your letter,
    gonna go read it now.
    maybe have a drink,
    it's now seven in the morning...
    my cup is waiting...

    ISN....you are great. seriously. the last two, especially the last one, have to be the best things i've ever read that i can relate to. wow. it's like you wrote something for me knowing exactly how i feel, the exact situation, expressing it better than i could....i'm really just blown away right now. damn.
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    you are alone....you are unique
    you are a cul-de-sac....a quiet street
    a dream of hazel in a kentish town
    a dream of feathers and a soft-quilt-down
    you are a child....who scribbles rough
    of times and rhymes and sinks in dough
    of doubting dreaming desperate sewing
    patches on the dreams you know....
    you took your dreams and traded them for love
    and love you found and love is like a dove
    it finds you wanting....wanting.....wanting white-
    washed houses where the smell of pine
    to run through hands the needles fine
    to run through children's hands that you begot
    you let her look....but, baby, you're no Lot...
    she took your love and threw it on a pile
    where now it grows in exponential style
    and like a beanstalk reaches up to heaven
    and teaches us the meaning of the seven
    lessons.....one, you loved her
    two....you dreamt
    three......she's lovely....
    four.....you went....
    five....alive
    six.....quick fix.....
    seven....heaven
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    and you...
    you are the Avenue,
    where Red Love is true.
    and you...
    you never made a sound,
    even when you turned my smile upside down.
    and you...
    you were my Blue crayon,
    the one i never let leave my hand.
    and you...
    you were my dream,
    in the gloom,
    in the gleam...
    you sold my dreams into slavery.

    no white doves,
    rather a Blue bird with a broken wing,
    that cannot sing.
    pine needles pierce my Heart,
    like the ones at Christmas times...
    stuck in the carpet.
    the warm grass stains your hands,
    the ones you use for walking...
    all over me.

    that pile of me has long since burned,
    and i'm writing here...and i never learned.
    i just wanted to talk, and all i got was this beanstalk.
    there is no heaven, when i'm stuck with hurt,
    i talked to Jesus, and all i got...
    was this lousy t-shirt.

    i was the bees-knees, Jack...mr. beanstalk man,
    it's way past seven,
    and it's thundering in heaven.
    can you teach me how to whisper like a boy...
    when the worst news...
    comes true...
    ?
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I can teach you how to whistle boy
    cat got your tongue
    I can teach you how to run Forrest
    run run run
    I am not the farmer's wife
    I left my life
    a while ago....
    I found a farm
    a plot
    a plough
    and so I sew and sew and sew
    I sew in velvet now and silk
    and suede....altho
    I'm never swayed
    the argument remains
    I think you know
    I held your dreams
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    don't say another word, you'll just feign anyway.
    i don't have the key to your door,
    i don't know the words to say.
    and just around the bend,
    is another seaside.
    time to earn my fins,
    and find my wife...
    but she has a butcher's knife.

    we've fallen for everything...
    when the twin towers crumbled liked suede.
    how did i end in this state, Dear Kate?
    is this real life,
    or the end of the world?

    i wanted you to stay, just the other day.
    but i'm not a golden boy,
    i don't know the words to sway.
    i don't have the Heart to decoy,
    when i'm on your diving board,
    waiting to be adored.
    will you find me offshore,
    or on your sea floor?
    i want to belong, is this my swan song?

    i remember everything from that day,
    when i watched the twin towers fade...
    how did we end in this state, Dear Kate?
    is this real life,
    or the end of the world?

    we're falling for everything,
    there's no one to dissuade.
    i wish all of those people had stayed...
    in real life...

    i've fallen for everything,
    but i remain unswayed.
    can you help me out of this state, Dear Kate?
    back to real life...
    back to your world...

    -kNb >08.21.03<
    i had to post this old one of mine for the obvious references...okay...now i'll reply... :)
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I wish I knew you as I knew you then
    when once you were my swan and I your pen
    but you have taken me to the beyond
    and now (if I can be so bold) this pond
    is bigger than I thought it could
    since first you wrote my name in feather'd blood
    I have the quill I took it from your hand....
    and Kate will have
    whatever Kate demands....
    leave off your pining....
    and your needled love
    I feint and faint and paint
    but in my kiddish glove
    (my yiddish trove)
    I hold but vases pitchers....jugs
    of love
    and dacquiri banana boats of moats of castles
    tasselled trains of trains of trains of trains
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    if i whistle,
    will you fire another missile?
    tongue-tied,
    my mouth's dry.
    i'll run with Forrest,
    we'll hide in a forest,
    of Love Love Love...
    and you're burnt,
    like cinders,
    and you're white,
    like winter.

    i met my wife,
    she had a butchers knife,
    and she carved a new life...
    for me.
    in the city,
    in the sun,
    where i live...
    in the thumb.
    she never was my wife,
    at least...not in real life.

    down on the farm,
    i never meant to do you harm,
    but i did,
    and you dug,
    a grave,
    for us.
    in a home...
    so far away from my own.

    i remember when you said,
    my head felt like suede,
    and you touched it everyday,
    i remember what you felt like...
    and you said i was so felt-like.

    you held my dreams,
    in a double-rainbow it seems.
    i think you know...
    i don't want you to go.
    i never wanted you to go...
    i don't want you to go...
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I know
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I have a stove for you
    a tall black hat
    to leave on the last pew
    right at the back
    of where you leave this cross
    that now you carry
    I am not there
    I never will yet marry
    your wedding and the funeral
    all the days
    you owe it to yourself
    and me, a friend,
    at last to distant waters
    now to send the ghost
    the most you have
    within....the heart of you
    is paining like my pin
    beneath a mattress
    and another one
    I wish you would forsake her
    and move on
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    i wish you knew me when,
    you say you knew me then.
    i was so innocent...we were so innocent.
    if i was your swan, then you were my song,
    you were my pen,
    and you are all over again.
    it's okay,
    i know i want too much,
    and i take too much,
    i only want to know why...
    i do it too much.

    my needled Love,
    has pierced my purple blood.
    you feint your faint,
    like money in the bank.

    my needled Love,
    with the damage done,
    paints mistakes,
    like kids drowning in lakes.

    my needled Love,
    paints your face,
    in purple,
    and i shade your cold lips,
    the ones i long to kiss.

    Kate, Dear Kate,
    where have you gone?
    you're still the one i dream of.
    you're the one who's hand i held...
    when you were wearing kids' gloves.

    save some of your Love for me,
    even though i prefer strawberry dacquiri's,
    i'll have what you're having,
    even if it's not meant for me.
    i'll drink you up,
    when you're coming like a train...
    full-speed in the rain.
    and i just can't get enough...
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    it hurts me now...I know the boy I knew
    when all the skies were grey
    and I was blue
    when first he trampled through my trodden threshold
    and lay me down with an eternal fleshhold
    what are you that it bothers me to know
    that all I love is something yet to grow...
    a stupid wish....a served-up fish....
    I could not bear another inch of him...
    he wrecks me as he wrenches
    and presses me to powd'ry benches
    I love him ever....always ever will
    and how could he appear yet still
    and still.....
    and I can't think right now....who was the boy
    you finish what you start
    or else my heart
    will savage you
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    there's a parade of men in hats,
    outside my door.
    they sound obscene,
    like machinery.
    they have a stove for me,
    like the one you've seen.
    my stove...my cross.
    what's worse...then loss?

    you'll never marry,
    and i'll never marry.
    now this cross that i carry,
    is getting too heavy.
    these days,
    all look the same in the end.
    when it's you,
    that i'd rather wed.
    when it's me,
    that rather was dead.

    i owe it to you,
    and the Love you leave,
    to promise someone,
    a better day...
    even if that someone is me.

    you're not the first friend,
    to wish the best for me.
    you're not the first friend,
    to tell me to go...just leave.

    so i'm going...
    i'm gone.
    i'm out in the ocean,
    swimming with my ghosts and,
    memories of nothing,
    when i thought they were something.

    deep in this Heart of me,
    is a broken down painting machine.
    deep in this Heart of mine,
    from another time,
    when you were mine...
    there is something...
    but it is you that has forsaken me.

    so i'm going...
    and i'm gone...
    goodbye, my Love...
    goodbye.
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    tell someone else that wants to know
    about how you're going to go-go-go
    I knew a dancer once a man
    he was punch-drunk...and so I am
    punch-drunk with love
    and I can't take no more....
    I wanted it....but that was way before
    I knew it would allow my shore to be
    a landing place for all the good and free
    habituates of hell who want from me
    true love.....leave off....I've had enough
    I took him in....a diamond in the rough
    I took the other....now you see it's three
    and now....you see....there is no room for me....
    I'm off to paddle in my shallow depths
    how can I saddle him - his shadow-self
    haunts everything.....I sleep with heart a-churning
    and cinders that I am.....I'm cinders burning....
    I can't pin down the feelings that betray me....
    but yet....go now...go quick....or else you'll sway me
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    this empty house,
    used to be a Home.
    it's grown so cold,
    just like the emptiness in you.
    now i sleep on the floor,
    with you by my side,
    but i didn't know...
    it would be the last time.

    i haven't seen your face,
    not since last April.
    i know that you have tried to replace,
    my Love but were unable.
    a true friend never leaves a friend to stand,
    alone in the shadows.
    but i didn't know...
    the shadows were creeping in slow...

    if i was some kind of man,
    none of this would happen.
    and if it's true that you would stay,
    none of this would happen.
    i know, it's ashame...

    this empty Heart,
    used to have a spark.
    it used to be so pure,
    now it's tainted with the flesh of you.
    there was a time,
    when i could read your mind,
    ...even though i was blind.
    i hope one day i'll know,
    a Love that never grows cold...
    it'll never grow old.
    until that day,
    i'll sleep on the floor,
    alone with the emptiness in you...
    with you not by my side.

    don't you close that door.
    without a Kiss before you go...
    before you walk away...
    i already know,
    you're not coming back today.

    this empty view,
    used to be of you.
    this gravel road,
    used to lead to you.
    this emptiness,
    reminds me we're though.
    we're through....through....through...
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I threw you.....through you
    cos you are a ghost
    I through you lived my life the most
    the mast I flew you on
    has broken twain
    and always find you ever yet the same
    I knew you when you chillblains blew and warmed
    I found you and my love you wore adorned
    you wore me wear me out...get out....now leave
    I need you more than all I ever 'trieved
    'cept the babe whose eyes are growing large
    the child I formed when into life he barged
    from my small womb
    my tomb is open yet....
    when is the love I find that I forget
    I find I cannot think of lovers now
    the child within my womb has air to grow
    and all the worrying that leaves me wrecked
    shall be on this babe spent....
    so go get fecked
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    go on, boy.
    go away.
    she never meant to say...
    and she never wanted to stay...
    and she never wanted to sway.
    but she caught herself,
    in the midst of a falter,
    when for a split-second,
    she thought you were her altar.
    a landing place for the brave,
    and the burial ground for one man's name...
    the one that lived inside...
    only long enough until he came.
    you were the one that wanted to know,
    but you were also the one that told me to feck off...
    to just go go go.
    and you wanted it? you wanted what? this?
    no, you never had this in mind.
    one plus one plus one is three, you see?
    there is room for you...
    you just have to believe...
    you have to want it.
    you cannot saddle a man with a shadow,
    i'm sorry. it's true.
    if he burned this hole in the Heart of you,
    then he never was good enough for you.

    he haunts you, you haunt me...
    i haunt you, she haunts me...
    she haunts you, he haunts me...
    you haunt you, i haunt me...

    this was never meant to be.
    i only wanted more for you,
    then i ever wanted for me.

    you are cinders burning,
    because your Love is yearning...
    for better days,
    for you and for me...
    i know...
    just ask me.
  • DopeBeastieDopeBeastie Posts: 2,513
    cowabunga dude and dudette... this is veritably fountainous... holy crow and holy cow....


    bravo to both



    and suede... it has been a very long time... these subject matters are so nice to see from your "pen"... i know i assume, but well.. that's how I am, so :P



    :D
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    thanks pasta,
    it was a great deal of fun and excitement. we generated about 100 hits in the span of a few hours on this thread, pretty cool.
    yeah, it's been a long time, too long. i don't know if they're nice to hear, but i know i'm better off writing about it then actually thinking hard about it. only three of my posts in this thread were actually written prior to all of this. i did, however, borrow some lines from myself throughout.
    thanks for the support and for remembering me after all of this time...

    viva la suede
    Originally posted by PastaNazi
    cowabunga dude and dudette... this is veritably fountainous... holy crow and holy cow....
    bravo to both
    and suede... it has been a very long time... these subject matters are so nice to see from your "pen"... i know i assume, but well.. that's how I am, so :P
    :D
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    goodbye my Love
    goodbye...

    hehehehehehehe

    :D
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    you left me on the racks like an old toy,
    with a broken face,
    such a broken waste.
    i cannot teach you how to play,
    when a fight with you,
    is what ensues.
    you left me on the fence with Heart half-torn,
    like the jeans you wore,
    like an open sore.
    i cannot teach you how to stay,
    when a night with you,
    is what will do.
    i just need to drink...
    myself...
    away...
    wash me down with you...
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    I carried you on my back like a young boy
    I tracked you down
    cracked your frown
    ....broke your crown
    you found me looking South
    and you kissed me....
    in my mouth I formed
    a universe....where I send you
    verse from....when I miss you.....
    when did they whip you
    I remember dreaming of him
    someone slapped him....
    I grabbed their leg
    I pegged the bitch
    I'll beg for pardon
    when I please
    but only if you tease me
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    i have a headache like an earthquake,
    and there's no sense of you that i can make.
    you carried me for days,
    and now the memory fades,
    of times like these sad memories.
    of times like this when you insist...
    if i come back down,
    you'll polish my crown.
    and you tracked me down,
    when i was swimming around,
    in a man-made lake,
    made by mistake,
    in the center of my bed.

    my head is crooked and cracked,
    my back is broken and spinal tapped.
    there's an earthquake in me,
    preventing me from sleep.
    but i looked South,
    and i saw what you see...
    and you kissed me...
    full on...
    my mouth.

    our universe spins,
    where we live like twins.
    where we laugh like kings,
    and die like thieves...
    where we spend our lives on our knees.

    i write more when i miss you,
    and here's the issue:

    i was whipped for days,
    by a bitch with a wooden peg-leg.
    i was dreaming of you,
    and it seemed like you knew.
    i went cuckoo,
    just thinking of life without you.
    'cos you sent me verse,
    of Beautiful words,
    of Beautiful hurt,
    from a Beautiful world.
    ...and i was dreaming of you,
    ...and you were dreaming of me
    i was lost in the city,
    you were lost in the sea.

    if i tease you less,
    will you want me more?

    open your mouth...
    i want to feel your breath...
    close your eyes and slide inside...
    i want all of you...
    until there's nothing left...
    i want you...
    to tease me...
    i want you.....
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    not tonight Josephine.....

    gota fuk if ya gotta headache....

    get fucked......

    go ta fuk
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    mmmm....i lurve it when you foookin talk dirty durty ya fuk ;)
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    go ta fuk....write some fukkin peotry....not this shit...."I have a headache....' ah....gee....fuk off
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • ISNISN Posts: 1,700
    r u in a coma yet.....?
    ....they're asking me to prove why I should be allowed to stay with my baby in Australia, because I'm mentally ill......and they think I should leave......
  • suedesuede Posts: 247
    i are in a coma.
    you sayin my last one sucked?
    you write some poetry ya fuk :D
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