Stupid is as Stupid does

I was reading a friend's post about how she tried to open the wrong car for a good 5 mins. Wrong make too. 

So let's have some laughs! What are some of the funny stupid things you've done?

Here's mine...
Shortly after I got my license, a friend convinced me that all stop signs with a white border were optional. I blew through every stop sign in Green Bay for two days. :lol:
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Comments

  • dankind
    dankind Posts: 20,841
    Forrest Gump is stupid.
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • RogueStoner
    RogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    dankind said:
    Forrest Gump is stupid.
    Hey, this isn't the "criticize a thread name" thread. Bite me. :tongue:
  • F Me In The Brain
    F Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 31,883
    I started collecting Pearl Jam merch
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • RogueStoner
    RogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    I started collecting Pearl Jam merch
    Join the club! Oh wait, you did. :lol:
  • HesCalledDyer
    HesCalledDyer Maryland Posts: 16,498
    I once spent a good 10-15 minutes searching the house far and wide, lifting couch cushions, looking under furniture, shaking the bed sheets, checking in my car, blah blah blah, cursing up a storm looking for my sunglasses.

    They were where they are in my profile pic.
  • F Me In The Brain
    F Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 31,883
    I once spent a good 10-15 minutes searching the house far and wide, lifting couch cushions, looking under furniture, shaking the bed sheets, checking in my car, blah blah blah, cursing up a storm looking for my sunglasses.

    They were where they are in my profile pic.
    I came home one night all fucked up....22 yrs old, first job, was out drinking with my boss.  Left my car at his house before we went out.  Took a taxi back to the townhouse I lived at with my buddy at the end of the night.  2:30 in the AM and I decide that I need to climb in through the bathroom window (window was high and pretty small) rather than wake my buddy up to let me in.
    Apparently I dragged over a huge/heavy iron bench and proceeded to force open the window, break the screen and dump myself through and onto the bathroom floor.
    I then took off my shirt & pants, raided the fridge, and turned on the TV.
    My roommate woke up from all of the racket, came downstairs and found me in my boxers grinding down some old pizza, watching Sportscenter. 

    He said he tried to talk to me but I was speaking my own language.

    Turns out my keys were in my pants pocket. 
    I left my car, not my keys.


    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • JK_Livin
    JK_Livin South Jersey Posts: 7,365
    I looked for my cell once while I was talking on it.
    Alright, alright, alright!
    Tom O.
    "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?"
    -The Writer
  • dankind
    dankind Posts: 20,841
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • I once spent a good 10-15 minutes searching the house far and wide, lifting couch cushions, looking under furniture, shaking the bed sheets, checking in my car, blah blah blah, cursing up a storm looking for my sunglasses.

    They were where they are in my profile pic.
    I did the same thing with my glasses once. Ever try looking for glasses when you can't see? I finally found them in the suitcase I had packed to go out of town for the weekend.
    I'm through with screaming
  • F Me In The Brain
    F Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 31,883
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • dankind
    dankind Posts: 20,841
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • PJ_Soul
    PJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,766
    dankind said:
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    :rofl:
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • F Me In The Brain
    F Me In The Brain this knows everybody from other commets Posts: 31,883
    dankind said:
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    Now that is the Dankind we know and love!
    The love he receives is the love that is saved
  • dankind
    dankind Posts: 20,841
    dankind said:
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    Now that is the Dankind we know and love!
    :sick:
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    dankind said:
    dankind said:
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    Now that is the Dankind we know and love!
    :sick:
    Quite Hobbes-esque.
  • dankind said:
    dankind said:
    I drank a jar of pickle juice and shit myself.
    That was a one time thing?
    Nah. I do it every Tuesday now for shits and pickles. 
    Now that is the Dankind we know and love!
    Explains a lot.
    09/15/1998 & 09/16/1998, Mansfield, MA; 08/29/00 08/30/00, Mansfield, MA; 07/02/03, 07/03/03, Mansfield, MA; 09/28/04, 09/29/04, Boston, MA; 09/22/05, Halifax, NS; 05/24/06, 05/25/06, Boston, MA; 07/22/06, 07/23/06, Gorge, WA; 06/27/2008, Hartford; 06/28/08, 06/30/08, Mansfield; 08/18/2009, O2, London, UK; 10/30/09, 10/31/09, Philadelphia, PA; 05/15/10, Hartford, CT; 05/17/10, Boston, MA; 05/20/10, 05/21/10, NY, NY; 06/22/10, Dublin, IRE; 06/23/10, Northern Ireland; 09/03/11, 09/04/11, Alpine Valley, WI; 09/11/11, 09/12/11, Toronto, Ont; 09/14/11, Ottawa, Ont; 09/15/11, Hamilton, Ont; 07/02/2012, Prague, Czech Republic; 07/04/2012 & 07/05/2012, Berlin, Germany; 07/07/2012, Stockholm, Sweden; 09/30/2012, Missoula, MT; 07/16/2013, London, Ont; 07/19/2013, Chicago, IL; 10/15/2013 & 10/16/2013, Worcester, MA; 10/21/2013 & 10/22/2013, Philadelphia, PA; 10/25/2013, Hartford, CT; 11/29/2013, Portland, OR; 11/30/2013, Spokane, WA; 12/04/2013, Vancouver, BC; 12/06/2013, Seattle, WA; 10/03/2014, St. Louis. MO; 10/22/2014, Denver, CO; 10/26/2015, New York, NY; 04/23/2016, New Orleans, LA; 04/28/2016 & 04/29/2016, Philadelphia, PA; 05/01/2016 & 05/02/2016, New York, NY; 05/08/2016, Ottawa, Ont.; 05/10/2016 & 05/12/2016, Toronto, Ont.; 08/05/2016 & 08/07/2016, Boston, MA; 08/20/2016 & 08/22/2016, Chicago, IL; 07/01/2018, Prague, Czech Republic; 07/03/2018, Krakow, Poland; 07/05/2018, Berlin, Germany; 09/02/2018 & 09/04/2018, Boston, MA; 09/08/2022, Toronto, Ont; 09/11/2022, New York, NY; 09/14/2022, Camden, NJ; 09/02/2023, St. Paul, MN; 05/04/2024 & 05/06/2024, Vancouver, BC; 05/10/2024, Portland, OR;

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  • brianlux
    brianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 43,675
    Oh for GOD"S SAKE Rogue Stoner, do you really want to read page after page after page of my lifetime's worth of fuck ups?  FUUUUCK!
    :rofl:
    "It's a sad and beautiful world"
    -Roberto Benigni

  • WhatYouTaughtMe
    WhatYouTaughtMe Posts: 4,957
    edited September 2017
    I recently lost a good amount of weight. So a few weeks ago I was excited when I got out of the shower, stepped on the scale and was under 200 lbs for the first time in a couple of years. I grabbed my phone and took a picture of the scale. I was so focused on making sure you could read the weight, I didn't realize just the tip of my man part made it in the frame. I then proceeded to send it to a few people that always give each other encouragement in our weight loss endeavors. Luckily my girlfriend quickly pointed out the error and I avoided sending it to my boss.
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    I recently lost a good amount of weight. So a few weeks ago I was excited when I got out of the shower, stepped on the scale and was under 200 lbs for the first time in a couple of years. I grabbed my phone and took a picture of the scale. I was so focused on making sure you could read the weight, I didn't realize just the tip of my man part made it in the frame. I then proceeded to send it to a few people that always give each other encouragement in our weight loss endeavors. Luckily my girlfriend quickly pointed out the error and I avoided sending it to my boss.
    You're the male equivalent of "Nip" =)
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    And congrats on the weight loss!