Diary of a shy person and the Internet Forums

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  • rollingsrollings Posts: 7,124
    edited September 2014
    that's Frankenstein in a small bat room tho
  • benjsbenjs Posts: 9,150
    edited September 2014
    chadwick said:

    "Bridges freak me out too... Something I probably shouldn't admit as a structural engineer

    A stranger one is a totally overwhelming sense of claustrophobia that comes over me when I'm walking on an escalator that isn't moving. Bizarre, eh?"

    have you engineered bridges? buildings? stadiums?

    claustrophobic while walking on a escalator that's standing still.... shit, you are jammed up
    i am claustrophobic when air is stale or in a mri tube or when sitting in those little rooms with the model knees & backs, medical posters & the good dr.s degrees framed on the walls.... the fucking door is closed & the room is small & there is no windows & you're sitting on the exam table with the paper sheet down the length of it.... the damn room the nurse takes vitals in & you wait to see the dr... fuck that room

    i've gotten up, opened the door & walked in circles doing laps waiting on the dr or the nurse. i don't like those rooms & i would rather have the door open, they would not though. it's like im frankenstein in a small bathroom & im going ape shit crazy trying to pee or two & the sink is on top of me. im trying to shower & the toilet is half way in the shower & the water pressure is like a toad spitting water on me. wtf!? i can't move.















    now im fucking shy again

    You crack me up, Chadwick :D

    I have engineered buildings exclusively... It was a short-lived engineering career to be fair; after about half a year I recognized that it was not an industry I belonged in and have found my calling in a specific subset of the tech industry. That being said, I have taken courses specifically on bridge design and am confident about the logic and safeguards applied to them, my phobia is entirely unwarranted and irrational.
    '05 - TO, '06 - TO 1, '08 - NYC 1 & 2, '09 - TO, Chi 1 & 2, '10 - Buffalo, NYC 1 & 2, '11 - TO 1 & 2, Hamilton, '13 - Buffalo, Brooklyn 1 & 2, '15 - Global Citizen, '16 - TO 1 & 2, Chi 2

    EV
    Toronto Film Festival 9/11/2007, '08 - Toronto 1 & 2, '09 - Albany 1, '11 - Chicago 1
  • chadwickchadwick Posts: 21,157
    i like engineers, they are, or, seem to be what i'd call smart
    nicely done finding your spot in life
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."

    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • benjsbenjs Posts: 9,150
    chadwick said:

    i like engineers, they are, or, seem to be what i'd call smart
    nicely done finding your spot in life

    Thanks, dude! Not going to lie - I didn't fit in as an engineer. Felt that way all through school, then throughout my short-lived career, and that was validated by a professional profile that left the firm's HR manager scratching his head. Introverts and people plagued with confidence issues are largely the minority within the industry... I'm a quiet type who loves to facilitate other peoples' abilities to shine. I have such a job now, and it's a real privilege!
    '05 - TO, '06 - TO 1, '08 - NYC 1 & 2, '09 - TO, Chi 1 & 2, '10 - Buffalo, NYC 1 & 2, '11 - TO 1 & 2, Hamilton, '13 - Buffalo, Brooklyn 1 & 2, '15 - Global Citizen, '16 - TO 1 & 2, Chi 2

    EV
    Toronto Film Festival 9/11/2007, '08 - Toronto 1 & 2, '09 - Albany 1, '11 - Chicago 1
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    benjs said:

    chadwick said:

    i like engineers, they are, or, seem to be what i'd call smart
    nicely done finding your spot in life

    Thanks, dude! Not going to lie - I didn't fit in as an engineer. Felt that way all through school, then throughout my short-lived career, and that was validated by a professional profile that left the firm's HR manager scratching his head. Introverts and people plagued with confidence issues are largely the minority within the industry... I'm a quiet type who loves to facilitate other peoples' abilities to shine. I have such a job now, and it's a real privilege!
    I'm quite similar...and I think in being/doing so, you shine upon your own abilities as well.
  • benjsbenjs Posts: 9,150
    hedonist said:

    benjs said:

    chadwick said:

    i like engineers, they are, or, seem to be what i'd call smart
    nicely done finding your spot in life

    Thanks, dude! Not going to lie - I didn't fit in as an engineer. Felt that way all through school, then throughout my short-lived career, and that was validated by a professional profile that left the firm's HR manager scratching his head. Introverts and people plagued with confidence issues are largely the minority within the industry... I'm a quiet type who loves to facilitate other peoples' abilities to shine. I have such a job now, and it's a real privilege!
    I'm quite similar...and I think in being/doing so, you shine upon your own abilities as well.
    Agreed :) I think we're lucky to be wired this way.
    '05 - TO, '06 - TO 1, '08 - NYC 1 & 2, '09 - TO, Chi 1 & 2, '10 - Buffalo, NYC 1 & 2, '11 - TO 1 & 2, Hamilton, '13 - Buffalo, Brooklyn 1 & 2, '15 - Global Citizen, '16 - TO 1 & 2, Chi 2

    EV
    Toronto Film Festival 9/11/2007, '08 - Toronto 1 & 2, '09 - Albany 1, '11 - Chicago 1
  • Love the name of your new book Chadwick. :)) I'm a facilitator also. Good work figuring it out Benjs. It takes strength to accept that you made a mistake in a life direction and changing it.
    "Feel the path of everyday....which road you taking?"

    Barrie, ON '98
    Toronto, ON '00/'03/'06/'09/'11/'16(x2)
    Hamilton, ON '05/'11
    Newark, NJ '10
    London, ON '13
    Buffalo, NY '13
    Detroit, MI '14
    Ottawa, ON '16
  • brianluxbrianlux Posts: 42,042
    Good words there in your first post, Walking. I also was painful shy when I was young. I'm still fairly self-conscious and maybe that's why (subconsciously?) I've put myself into positions of having to push past that- being a teacher, working with the public in bookstores, doing book fairs, organizing a rally, etc.
    This is a great place to spend time interacting with good people. Then go to a PJ show and meet some of this fine folks. You'll do fine!
    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524

    Love the name of your new book Chadwick. :)) I'm a facilitator also. Good work figuring it out Benjs. It takes strength to accept that you made a mistake in a life direction and changing it.

    You know, I think it takes strength to even realize it; sometimes, it's so easy to fool ourselves. And to what end?


    ps to Brian - you do pretty well speaking your mind! Freedom via the physical or pen or keyboard, all an exposure of ourselves. TO ourselves.

    I like it...as I do this thread :)
  • I've done fairly well Brian. I keep tabs on it and push myself. But some days I fall back to old habits. I just know that I'm not the only one, and others may be in different stages of dealing with their shyness, so I felt it needed to be said. And for me it was cathartic. I was nervous to post anything serious on here before.
    "Feel the path of everyday....which road you taking?"

    Barrie, ON '98
    Toronto, ON '00/'03/'06/'09/'11/'16(x2)
    Hamilton, ON '05/'11
    Newark, NJ '10
    London, ON '13
    Buffalo, NY '13
    Detroit, MI '14
    Ottawa, ON '16
  • I feel like there is going to be a big group hug here. And I'm good with that.
    "Feel the path of everyday....which road you taking?"

    Barrie, ON '98
    Toronto, ON '00/'03/'06/'09/'11/'16(x2)
    Hamilton, ON '05/'11
    Newark, NJ '10
    London, ON '13
    Buffalo, NY '13
    Detroit, MI '14
    Ottawa, ON '16
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    I don't do group hugs, but I've been known to subject some asses to pinches and the occasional goose :D
  • hedonist said:

    I don't do group hugs, but I've been known to subject some asses to pinches and the occasional goose :D

    :)) Sweet
    "Feel the path of everyday....which road you taking?"

    Barrie, ON '98
    Toronto, ON '00/'03/'06/'09/'11/'16(x2)
    Hamilton, ON '05/'11
    Newark, NJ '10
    London, ON '13
    Buffalo, NY '13
    Detroit, MI '14
    Ottawa, ON '16
  • brianluxbrianlux Posts: 42,042

    I've done fairly well Brian. I keep tabs on it and push myself. But some days I fall back to old habits. I just know that I'm not the only one, and others may be in different stages of dealing with their shyness, so I felt it needed to be said. And for me it was cathartic. I was nervous to post anything serious on here before.

    Hey! See, you're doing great already! :-D

    “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
    Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.













  • kce8kce8 Posts: 1,636
    kce8 said:

    nice post this place needs this after the last few days :-c

    \:D/ you are so right...it was a little bit sad the last days.

    I do mostly only read all this stuff here. My English isn´t that good so I often don´t write what I would like to say bc it´s so difficult if you want to explane some complex stuff in a foreign language especially on The Moving Train. But I hope it will get better and people can understand what I want to say.
    I can only say I like this place and people here so much! >:D<
    badbrains said:

    kce8 said:

    nice post this place needs this after the last few days :-c

    \:D/ you are so right...it was a little bit sad the last days.

    I do mostly only read all this stuff here. My English isn´t that good so I often don´t write what I would like to say bc it´s so difficult if you want to explane some complex stuff in a foreign language especially on The Moving Train. But I hope it will get better and people can understand what I want to say.
    I can only say I like this place and people here so much! >:D<
    Have you seen how GF spells his own English speaking language???? You're doing fine! And GF, u know I ment that with love..... :D
    Thank you badbrains! Haven´t mentioned that before.

    Reading is not a problem...even if it happens that I don´t get some meanings, but I think that´s bc of some expressions I cannot understand. Bigger challenge is to find the right words, and it´s taking so much time to bring them in the right arrangement...lol...but I do exercise...
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