I just need to talk....

PJSiren

And this isn't something I want posted for the world to see on my blog....but I feel more comfortable venting here.

So my family is going through a really rough time right now, as I can't find a job....I'm out of work due to the fact that I had to have a total hip replacement, which I had and have been cleared to go back to work, my former employer held my position as long as they could, but due to my age, I had a really hard time finding a surgeon to do the surgery, so it took me several months past when they let me go to actually even find a surgeon, I had the surgery in January and was cleared at the beginning of April to return to work....I apply and apply for jobs and I go on so many interviews, it's ridiculous, but for whatever reason, I never get the job....I dunno if it's because I had a nose ring(which I just finally took out a few days ago), or because I have a couple small visible tattoos....I can't figure it out, in this day and age, you really wouldn't think something as tiny as a nose ring or as small as my visible ink would make a difference if I'm the most qualified....but I still can't find anyone to give me a shot....I can't even get a job at Target as a cashier....they wouldn't even give me an interview....I don't know why.

Due to all this we have some really difficult decisions we're facing, as we won't be able to stay living where we are past September if I don't go to work...we have a couple options, one is living in a travel trailer, but my husbands parents would have to help finance it, and we would park it at an RV park....it's really not ideal as we have a teenage daughter and pets, the other option is to move myself and our daughter and the pets down to where his parents and family all live and we stay with one of them and our daughter goes to school there and I learn the community and my hubby stays with friends up here and works until he can get a job down there and we move there. I'm not completely against it, it's just that it'll be 6 hours away from my family, and that'll be really hard for me.

All this stress from not being able to find a job and having to face these decisions has been causing me to be in a depression, and to have a lot of migraines lately....it really sucks, I just don't know what more to do to make myself seem employable to people, I have the experience in what I'm trying to get a job in...it's not like I'm reaching for something I have no experience in....you know? So I just don't get it...I was supposed to have an interview today, but the temp agency never called me to give me info, so I guess they decided I wasn't the best candidate for the position....a guy did find my resume on CL, and message me, and I am supposed to have an interview with that company on Thursday.

I dunno what you guys do....pray, cross fingers, whatever, but if you could just keep my family in your thoughts, it would mean a lot!

Thanks for listening to me rant!

hedonist

Sorry you're going through this; I know how stressful it can be on so many fronts.

I don't know much about the job market where you are, but have you asked the temp agency for feedback on your interviews? Could you have someone objective critique your appearance, demeanor and resume? Not saying you're unemployable, but sometimes it might come down to something relatively small and easy to change or tweak that's preventing you from getting past the interview phase.

Maybe also try a non-temp agency?

I wish you (and your family) luck and hope you find something you like soon so you don't have to uproot yourselves. I'll keep good thoughts for you and hope Thursday goes well.

(and rant anytime - it's a sanity-saver!)

badbrains

We should start a thread about jobs for people looking for jobs. there's got to be someone who has hiring power in some job.

PJSiren

hedonist said:

Sorry you're going through this; I know how stressful it can be on so many fronts.

I don't know much about the job market where you are, but have you asked the temp agency for feedback on your interviews? Could you have someone objective critique your appearance, demeanor and resume? Not saying you're unemployable, but sometimes it might come down to something relatively small and easy to change or tweak that's preventing you from getting past the interview phase.

Maybe also try a non-temp agency?

I wish you (and your family) luck and hope you find something you like soon so you don't have to uproot yourselves. I'll keep good thoughts for you and hope Thursday goes well.

(and rant anytime - it's a sanity-saver!)

The job market has been shit...but has been picking up, and I am applying for jobs on my own outside of the temp agencies, I was just so put out that they never called today with the info about the interview....but alas, I feel I must look at it as a sign I wasn't meant to have that one and move on.

I take a picture of my interview outfits and send to my bestie every time I try a new combo and she always tells me it looks professional or no it doesn't...she's very honest with me...My mom has looked at my resume and helped me make it, the only other thing I can think of is that the stress shows, and comes across in my demeanor somehow during the interview, or I come across as nervous. I try my best to be upbeat and personable....

But thank you! I can use all the positive thoughts I can get!

shortstack

have you tried whole foods? it's not right, but target does judge based on your appearance. so does whole foods, but in a good way.

shetellsherself

Hi WhisperinHands...

Sorry to hear of your troubles. I've found that it is very necessary to be persistent with potential employers. You must follow up on applications with phone calls, emails, drop by when appropriate. I'm not saying be a pest but you have to make yourself more memorable. Trust me, others are doing this and if you don't you will be easily forgotten and seen as unmotivated or disinterested. Have confidence in yourself and project that. I hope you find something soon.

PJSiren

shortstack said:

have you tried whole foods? it's not right, but target does judge based on your appearance. so does whole foods, but in a good way.

I have not...I'm not even sure if we have one in Salem...I would have to look into that.

shetellsherself said:

Hi WhisperinHands...

Sorry to hear of your troubles. I've found that it is very necessary to be persistent with potential employers. You must follow up on applications with phone calls, emails, drop by when appropriate. I'm not saying be a pest but you have to make yourself more memorable. Trust me, others are doing this and if you don't you will be easily forgotten and seen as unmotivated or disinterested. Have confidence in yourself and project that. I hope you find something soon.

I do follow up, I do my best to make sure they remember me and know that I am still interested. If I haven't hear from them by about 2pm on the day they say they'll let me know, I make the phone call....I am persistent.

amethgr8

I had that whole "my immediate financial obligations depend on this interview" thing, everyday in sales on commission. You spent so much time you don't know if they are going to make a sale, but if I don't I may have to visit my brother for dinner cause my cupboard is bare. Hard to "take that out of the equation".

After days, weeks, series of audio tapes and self motivational exposure, it hit me. Somebody said it depends on making a sale, not that one particular sale. If you're out there giving 100%,following up on every single lead with the knowledge that you have to get a million to make a sale! I went like a mad dog and I made a sale sooner than later.

First you have to know that you're not done and you have more trying to give. Then you have to know that you're giving 100% for that day. That's all you got is a 100%, you'll have not so 100% days cause your kid is sick or whatever, but you still give what you got. When you come home without a job, you gotta let it go and know tomorrow is a new day and it's possible you could get 3 job offers or non, but it's not predetermined . You gotta give 100% to your kids, yourself and your husband so that you can be happy the next day! feel good about the time you had with them and made a point to let go of one (for the moment) so you can rejuvenate yourself with the other.

You gotta hear a lot of no's before you get a yes, but you gotta be in the right place at the right time and you won't if you're kicking yourself for going thru a tough time. The job market is more diluted and more competitive than ever. Have a smile for the first time your anyone sees you, look them in the eye, keep you chin up and give a good handshake. And yes an no and complete sentences. Every no you get, is one step closer to a yes, apply for everything even remotely close to work your willing to do.

Life beats us up enough from time to time, no need for double duty from ourselves as well. You can't make someone give you a job, you gotta be ther when someone makes that decision.

We give 100% and that's all we got! you need to be able to sleep with a clear conscious knowing you gave it your best. When I'm off, I'm off, doesn't do me any good to not enjoy my off time because I don't have a sale in the pipeline. I'm off, enjoy my time and come back to work with my 100%, but if I stress about it while I'm off then when I get back at it, I'm kind of feel like I'm even more wore out.

Maybe that will help. I get stressed with some family obligations, I give sometimes I'm emotionally exhausted, like I cant take more, wonder how to get out of bed, how will I have time for everything. Prioritize-what absolutely has to be done before the end of the day.

It's a delicate balance to maintain sanity.

hedonist

Wowza! Great insights up there and though not meant for me, I thank you

amethgr8

if only to help one,that helps another, and another right...

PJSiren

Thank you for your advice....it is easier said than done to not stress, but I will give it my best.

SD48277

First off: I am sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this, and I hope things turn around quickly for you.

Do you have a good relationship with your former employer? Is it possible to reach out to him/her and ask if he/she knows of anyone in that field that may be hiring? And even though it may suck--network, network, network.

Fingers crossed for you for your interview on Thursday.

madtowndave

SD48277 said:

First off: I am sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this, and I hope things turn around quickly for you.

Do you have a good relationship with your former employer? Is it possible to reach out to him/her and ask if he/she knows of anyone in that field that may be hiring? And even though it may suck--network, network, network.

Fingers crossed for you for your interview on Thursday.

Said perfectly. Almost all positions are filled via networking or having an inside connection. Use your old employer, old contacts, customers, etc.

http://www.asktheheadhunter.com/basics.htm is a terribly organized website, and his weekly blogs are pretty spot on. I have shared his advice with many students, and I know other professionals who use his suggestions as well.

Best of luck!

PJSiren

SD48277 said:

First off: I am sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this, and I hope things turn around quickly for you.

Do you have a good relationship with your former employer? Is it possible to reach out to him/her and ask if he/she knows of anyone in that field that may be hiring? And even though it may suck--network, network, network.

Fingers crossed for you for your interview on Thursday.

I have reached out to my former employer, and while I thought we had a good relationship, it seems she doesn't want to help me....for whatever reason. So I don't know what that's about...I've applied for other open positions within the company, as I worked for a large company...but so far nothing has come from that.

madtowndave said:

SD48277 said:

First off: I am sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this, and I hope things turn around quickly for you.

Do you have a good relationship with your former employer? Is it possible to reach out to him/her and ask if he/she knows of anyone in that field that may be hiring? And even though it may suck--network, network, network.

Fingers crossed for you for your interview on Thursday.

Said perfectly. Almost all positions are filled via networking or having an inside connection. Use your old employer, old contacts, customers, etc.

http://www.asktheheadhunter.com/basics.htm is a terribly organized website, and his weekly blogs are pretty spot on. I have shared his advice with many students, and I know other professionals who use his suggestions as well.

Best of luck!

I will check out that website for advice too, thank you!

amethgr8

where does worry and stress get us? sometime it is hard to avoid, sometimes it good it keeps us on our toes. worry doesn't solve the problems of today, just takes away the ability to enjoy it.

a little stress is okay, but when you've done your best, you have to be able to get up with a clear head and give another day of your best. whatever way you can figure out to do that.

brianlux

You have my good thoughts and hopes for you, WhisperinHands. The best job hunting advice I've ever gotten was to think of the kinds of jobs you would like doing and the companies you would like to work for and go to them and tell them so- convince them that this is something you would do well and this is the place you want to do it.

So wise of you to reach out here. We're all pulling for you!

madtowndave

brianlux said:

You have my good thoughts and hopes for you, WhisperinHands. The best job hunting advice I've ever gotten was to think of the kinds of jobs you would like doing and the companies you would like to work for and go to them and tell them so- convince them that this is something you would do well and this is the place you want to do it.

So wise of you to reach out here. We're all pulling for you!

+1

PJSiren

Thanks guys! I appreciate all your support and advice a lot....I have been applying for jobs today, just a few, as not many were posted and I've not been feeling so well....I didn't sleep great last night, and caused me to just feel wrecked today, but I have done some and found one that wants you to bring your resume in person, so if I have enough ink in my printer, I'm going to print it and do that tomorrow....

Again, thank you so much for everything, you've really made me feel like I have somewhere to go to talk about all this stuff and I was just so stressed because I needed to get it out before and I feel better since I did. There is still stress, but it is a little less for having been able to vent my feelings and frustrations here. :-)

Annafalk

Hi,
I think maybe it was a smart thing to remove the nose ring (even if it looks good).
Try to look as proper as possible. Hoping to hear good news soon! >-

RKCNDY

I'm sorry to hear about your troubles, I know it can be very frustrating to keep trying your best and you don't seem to be going anywhere. Does your community/city have an unemployment office? I know some can be great resources and offer lots of help such as resume writing skills, interview skills, and even free classes on computer programs-like excel, word, etc, (sometimes a professional will even volunteer time and offer to look over resumes and help with writing it).

Maybe even volunteer for the time being, some employers like to see that you are still attempting to do something productive and that could give you an edge over other applicants. I'm currently not working so I just started a volunteer position, the gal there seemed to be very helpful and told me about a position in a similar field. You can network that way as well.

Best of luck to you!

The Juggler

i hope everything works out for you. i was laid off and unemployed for about 6 months once. it is not fun and i certainly understand the stress you are going through. keep your head up.

Wobbie

I'll be rooting for you!

I know you're a good person and it's easy to see you're no dummy, just by the way you write. Seriously, i can tell!

As the Juggler said, keep your head up......and I'll add, BELIEVE,

Green Circle

OoF!! I completely understand as well as many other above me. I went 9 months without work or unemployment insurance. It was a tough row to hoe, but I finally got work with a temp agency and the that company hired me full time and this is where I sit as I am typing this.

I know, BELIEVE ME, I know its difficult to stay positive. Meditate, pray, do what ever you have to, to keep your head up. something will come along.

What is it you do? What have you done in the past? Look everywhere, post on message boards, craigslist salem.craigslist.org/, monster, jobsearch.monster.com/search/?where=Salem__2C-OR ,indeed, indeed.com/jobs?q=&l=Salem%2C+OR, Register at temp services, find your local work force and development center .. worksourceoregon.org/home/worksourcecenters/248-salem

You are the master of your own salvation. fight for your familys survival.

incidentally, what does your husband do for work?

I'm here for you....we all are.

Prayers and thoughts, and positive vibrations sent out to Salem

SD48277

Positive vibes for your interview today.

g under p

Op, I like nose rigs however some employers out there don't so presentation can be everything. I'm currently employed but not working for the next 3-4 months, (triple orthodesis ankle surgery) I'm on workmanship comp and still getting paid.

I may have the same problem when it's time for me to return to work but I don't stress it I just keep doing my sit ups all day long. I can't bare any weight on it for 6 weeks....so for your stress when there's a break or when you have time exercise. Just sweat that stress out of you, it will make you feel better and will certainly help you to sleep. I know it helps I was out of work except for odd jobs here and there for a year...lost 40 lbs then after finding a job continued working out lost another 30lbs.

Music helps with the inevitable stress, any music helps....some words from Positive Vibrations...Bob Marley.....
If you get down and quarrel everyday
You're saying prayers to the devil, I say
Why not help another on the way
Make it much easier
Say you just can't live that negative way
You know what I mean
Make way for the positive day

Cause its a new day
New time, new feeling yeah!
Say it's a new sign
Oh what a new day
Picking up.
Are you picking up now.....

Feel good about yourself we are here for you and we will follow along your journey I can't wait for the day you tell us you found what you've been looking for.

http://youtu.be/SGg__SX8HyM

Peace

OMGkatwoman

Good luck today on your interview, we are all pulling for ya! >:D<

hedonist

Chiming in on the well wishes...no pressure though

northerndragon

I agree with RKCNDY maybe try volunteering while job hunting, gets you out of the house, clears the head and lowers the stress level. It is also a great place to network, meet people from all walks and they may have a lead for you.
Hope it all works out and you find something soon.

PJSiren

Thank you so much everyone! I am so glad I decided to post because your words of encouragement have been such a blessing to me the past several days. I had my interview today and it went really well....it was a really fun interview....I actually enjoyed it where as usually I'm just wishing for it to be over....they said they would let me know one way or another on Monday or Tuesday....so *fingers crossed* we shall see in a few days....

Again thank you so much!!! :-) I love this place!!! :x :x :x

pjhawks

send a follow up email on Friday just to say you enjoyed the interview and think you would make a good member of the team or something like that.


and good luck. hope you hear good things next week.

The Waiting Trophy Man

Good luck