She just walked away?

the wolf

Godfather. wrote:

the wolf wrote:

I dream of just walking away.

you can walk away but you can never leave,

Godfather.

polaris_x

PJ_Soul wrote:

I am only compassionate for those that deserve it. I don't see that this selfish woman does. If someone gives me a reason to feel compassion for her, then I will, but there is nothing I've read that tells me she deserves much more than contempt.

sooo ... a yahoo article or some press clippings are enough information for you to judge!? ... honestly, there's nothing wrong with that as we all do it in one form or another ... i just feel like we don't really know ... maybe more will come out ...

PJ_Soul

redrock wrote:

Women can be as much of an asshole as men PJ_Soul.

Whilst not quite 'defending' this lady, I am just asking why so quick to condemn. Sure, she seemed to have 'snapped' and just disappeared. Not much is said in this article so all is really speculation. But if it were planned, I would have thought someone would do a better job at the planning. It's not like she lived the life of Riley out there. Yes, she was going through troubled times, upset and she was maybe weaker than others. Many cope in her situation - and some much worse. She didn't - she saw a way out.

I would speak of a father in the same situation in the same way.

But here, it would seem that judgement has been made because she was a mother 'Ultimate betrayal, their Mother'

What I'm saying - we don't know what happened. We don't know why. We don't know what kind of life she had (obviously not incredible relationship as she was going through a divorce. We don't know her medical history or anything. Seems some people are more inclined to give the benefit of the doubt to proven killers than a person who seems to have had an 'episode'.

Fair enough... although it did say that she was just sitting there, and 3 homeless people she didn't know approached her and asked her to come to Florida with them, and she just said okay, and left. No planning. She just bailed spur of the moment because it was easier than going home. That's what it sounds like.

PJ_Soul

polaris_x wrote:

PJ_Soul wrote:

I am only compassionate for those that deserve it. I don't see that this selfish woman does. If someone gives me a reason to feel compassion for her, then I will, but there is nothing I've read that tells me she deserves much more than contempt.

sooo ... a yahoo article or some press clippings are enough information for you to judge!? ... honestly, there's nothing wrong with that as we all do it in one form or another ... i just feel like we don't really know ... maybe more will come out ...

Sure. It's not like I know this woman or am invested. From what I know, I think she's selfish. It's not like my opinion, based on the information available, hurts anyone, so why not make a judgement (until some kind of info that will change my mind comes along, which I doubt will happen). I trust my instincts, and I do think there is enough info to base an opinion on. If she was depressed, that is not a good excuse IMO.

redrock

PJ_Soul wrote:

redrock wrote:

Women can be as much of an asshole as men PJ_Soul.

Whilst not quite 'defending' this lady, I am just asking why so quick to condemn. Sure, she seemed to have 'snapped' and just disappeared. Not much is said in this article so all is really speculation. But if it were planned, I would have thought someone would do a better job at the planning. It's not like she lived the life of Riley out there. Yes, she was going through troubled times, upset and she was maybe weaker than others. Many cope in her situation - and some much worse. She didn't - she saw a way out.

I would speak of a father in the same situation in the same way.

But here, it would seem that judgement has been made because she was a mother 'Ultimate betrayal, their Mother'

What I'm saying - we don't know what happened. We don't know why. We don't know what kind of life she had (obviously not incredible relationship as she was going through a divorce. We don't know her medical history or anything. Seems some people are more inclined to give the benefit of the doubt to proven killers than a person who seems to have had an 'episode'.

Fair enough... although it did say that she was just sitting there, and 3 homeless people she didn't know approached her and asked her to come to Florida with them, and she just said okay, and left. No planning. She just bailed spur of the moment because it was easier than going home. That's what it sounds like.

She was sitting there, crying. Having heard that she had been denied housing/financial assistance, not quite knowing what she was going to be able to do with raising her kids. Vulnerable - 'kind' people see her, ask her what's up, propose an 'exit' and she takes it... Yes.. probably easier than facing the hardship.

Godfather.

depression makes some people do strange things.

my mother and father seperated when I was in high school I came home from school and they were gone..no bullshit they left and went in different directions leaving 3 of us at home I was 18 my bro 17 and my sister 13
and after a year of not making house payments and bootleging the water and electricty (hay we had to survive)
the police finally told us to leave but for aprox 12-13 months we PARTIED !!!! and in that time we saw our mother or father only a few times, they turned their backs on us big time.
we are all a family and getting along better now but the whole deal left gaps in the family unit that will never heal.

moral of the story...man or woman both can snap and a walk away from life as they know it but they pay the price for the rest of their lives and never stop being sorry for what they did.

Godfather.

the wolf

people who have never had the pleasure of going through, or being close to someone who is going through
a severe bout with depression will NEVER understand that moment of pure helplessness and isolation that one feels. When i reached that point i was lucky that someone very close to me noticed. Most did not.
I can say for without a doubt that at THAT very moment, it felt like the only way out. I obvioulsy wasn't thinking clearly, because the next day i was so thankful that this person showed up when they did and recognized what i was clearly trying to hide from them.

it was Christmas eve of 2010. If she hadnt just stopped by my house unannounced when she did, i wouldn't have seen Christmas morning. What i cannot stress enough, was that in that moment of horror, it FELT like the only option, and the most natural thing in the world to do, and i was tottally okay with it.

The thought of my family and friends finding out on Christmas day never even entered my mind, what did cross my mind would be the relief i imagined they would feel for not having to deal with Steve and his fucked up little world anymore.

It sounds crazy, i know. It sounds crazy to me too now. At the time, that moment, maybe even just that hour.... it was the only way.

An angel knocked on my door though, and now you fuckers are stuck with me.

the wolf

that's the most i've ever said about that night, and will probably be the only time i'll ever talk about it again.

i understand where most are coming from on this, i just wish they for a second would try to understand the mindset of someone who reaches that "breaking" point.

Thanks,
Ya'll have a great weekend.

polaris_x

thanks for sharing ...

the sad part is that the same people who will congratulate you now for hanging in will be the first to shit on you if you didn't ... meanwhile you are the same person ... sometimes a little compassion can go a long way for people ...

redrock

Godfather - that must have been such a shock to you and your siblings.
Wolf - such darkness.....

Both of you managed to deal with the situation (though by the skin of your teeth Wolf). Some can't and will go 'all the way'.

PJ_Soul

redrock wrote:

PJ_Soul wrote:

redrock wrote:

Women can be as much of an asshole as men PJ_Soul.

Whilst not quite 'defending' this lady, I am just asking why so quick to condemn. Sure, she seemed to have 'snapped' and just disappeared. Not much is said in this article so all is really speculation. But if it were planned, I would have thought someone would do a better job at the planning. It's not like she lived the life of Riley out there. Yes, she was going through troubled times, upset and she was maybe weaker than others. Many cope in her situation - and some much worse. She didn't - she saw a way out.

I would speak of a father in the same situation in the same way.

But here, it would seem that judgement has been made because she was a mother 'Ultimate betrayal, their Mother'

What I'm saying - we don't know what happened. We don't know why. We don't know what kind of life she had (obviously not incredible relationship as she was going through a divorce. We don't know her medical history or anything. Seems some people are more inclined to give the benefit of the doubt to proven killers than a person who seems to have had an 'episode'.

Fair enough... although it did say that she was just sitting there, and 3 homeless people she didn't know approached her and asked her to come to Florida with them, and she just said okay, and left. No planning. She just bailed spur of the moment because it was easier than going home. That's what it sounds like.

She was sitting there, crying. Having heard that she had been denied housing/financial assistance, not quite knowing what she was going to be able to do with raising her kids. Vulnerable - 'kind' people see her, ask her what's up, propose an 'exit' and she takes it... Yes.. probably easier than facing the hardship.

Easier for her.... abandoning your children isn't supposed to be the easier option. That's the problem.

redrock

Sometimes it may seem like it. The thought of the responsibilities just too much... How can I put a roof over their heads? How will I feed them? Clothes them? Won't be able to do it - better off without me....

I don't know..... Lots of turmoil, I would think.

callen

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

redrock

I think we do callen. I think that in general, society believes there is a 'special' bond between mother and children that does not exist between father and children. A mother just can't abandon her children, it's against nature...

Thus one of the comments here when judging the woman saying it was the 'ultimate betrayal. Their mother'. Would it have been deemed as ultimate if it had been the father? Don't know...........

Godfather.

callen wrote:

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

I was thinking the same thing about mothers at a higher standard and if you think about it how could we not ?
9 months in her womb and the first part of our lives is and sometimes all our lives are spent with her even in an adopted situation it's the woman that showes that compassion and love only a woman can give men on the other hand have been the hunter gatherer taking what they want from the start,it seems that men are expected to be strong and not show pain because they are the "domonit and stronger of the species" I'm not trying to ruffle any fethers but all my life when I looked around me that's what I have noticed and what I was taught, if it wernt for moms we would all have the viking mentality many still do.

Godfather.

PJ_Soul

callen wrote:

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

That's what I was thinking. If this were a father everyone would just call him an irresponsible asshole, and that would be the end of it. Double standard.

callen

redrock wrote:

I think we do callen. I think that in general, society believes there is a 'special' bond between mother and children that does not exist between father and children. A mother just can't abandon her children, it's against nature...

Thus one of the comments here when judging the woman saying it was the 'ultimate betrayal. Their mother'. Would it have been deemed as ultimate if it had been the father? Don't know...........

Surprised this doesn't happen more often.

makes me think of Nazareth song

"only women bleed, only women bleeeeeeeed"

callen

Godfather. wrote:

callen wrote:

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

I was thinking the same thing about mothers at a higher standard and if you think about it how could we not ?
9 months in her womb and the first part of our lives is and sometimes all our lives are spent with her even in an adopted situation it's the woman that showes that compassion and love only a woman can give men on the other hand have been the hunter gatherer taking what they want from the start,it seems that men are expected to be strong and not show pain because they are the "domonit and stronger of the species" I'm not trying to ruffle any fethers but all my life when I looked around me that's what I have noticed and what I was taught, if it wernt for moms we would all have the viking mentality many still do.

Godfather.

Realized women are much tougher than men.....

PJ_Soul

callen wrote:

Godfather. wrote:

callen wrote:

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

I was thinking the same thing about mothers at a higher standard and if you think about it how could we not ?
9 months in her womb and the first part of our lives is and sometimes all our lives are spent with her even in an adopted situation it's the woman that showes that compassion and love only a woman can give men on the other hand have been the hunter gatherer taking what they want from the start,it seems that men are expected to be strong and not show pain because they are the "domonit and stronger of the species" I'm not trying to ruffle any fethers but all my life when I looked around me that's what I have noticed and what I was taught, if it wernt for moms we would all have the viking mentality many still do.

Godfather.

Realized women are much tougher than men.....

I think that we have evolved past this idea of using biological impulses to make an argument for or against deliberately abandoning our children. To me, it seems like a cop out for men.

STAYSEA

callen wrote:

Godfather. wrote:

callen wrote:

Some incredible thoughts and sharing on this thread.

Do we hold mothers to a higher standard than we do fathers. Fathers leave all the time and it doesn't make the news. Justified?

I was thinking the same thing about mothers at a higher standard and if you think about it how could we not ?
9 months in her womb and the first part of our lives is and sometimes all our lives are spent with her even in an adopted situation it's the woman that showes that compassion and love only a woman can give men on the other hand have been the hunter gatherer taking what they want from the start,it seems that men are expected to be strong and not show pain because they are the "domonit and stronger of the species" I'm not trying to ruffle any fethers but all my life when I looked around me that's what I have noticed and what I was taught, if it wernt for moms we would all have the viking mentality many still do.

Godfather.

Realized women are much tougher than men.....