Children should be allowed to get bored

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Comments

  • BlockheadBlockhead Posts: 1,538
    hedonist wrote:
    Blockhead wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    Agreed on your first part. I don't think anyone's villifying one way or the other - or any others - just not a bombardment of activities and being continuously on the go.

    As to the last part, agreed again.

    (and let's hope WE are not having our thinking done for us either - as adults, we need to practice our preachings, otherwise we're just squawkboxes)
    What is "bombardment of activities" and why is that bad?
    I don't understand how being ACTIVE is somehow BAD now...
    I don't believe I've said that being active is bad. As I've mentioned, it's about being so overscheduled-out-the-ass that there's no downtime to just breathe, and think, and enjoy some truly free time.
    Can you give me an example of being overscheduled out the ass (experience)
    I say this because my kids are extremely active with activities (soccer,softball,art class,girl scouts). They have something everyday. BUT they also have a TON of down time...
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    edited March 2013
    Parents know their kids the best...
    just don't see how anyone can say it should be this way or that.

    Personally I thought the article was silly. Either you are a creative person or you are not.
    You excel at what you are good at, you choose to occupy your time with things
    you will succeed in.

    Children are experimenting in just that. Finding what they like.
    They try many things, stick with a few. This is play.
    Play's not going back to statue maker.

    As far as boredom a direct link to creativity, I think living is period.
    The creative mind finds it's way no matter how busy the body is.
    Post edited by pandora on
  • brianluxbrianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 42,391
    Blockhead wrote:
    brianlux wrote:
    I was just thinking about how my six year old grand niece now has a one year old sister and the six year old helps with the baby. This seems to work well for both girls. My Mom grew up attending a one room school house- all elementary grades taught by one woman under one roof- and the older kids helped teach the younger ones. I'm convinced segregating kids by age is not the best way to go. I've heard of schools that are beginning to have mixed ages work together.
    Why are you "convinced" that segregating kids by age is not the best way to go...
    Partly from my own limited experience- I taught a 5/6th grade combo for two years and saw how having multiple grades worked well- but even more so from talking with other teachers who taught multiple-graded classes who were very enthusiastic about the arrangement. But I'm not a highly qualified education expert so maybe instead of "convinced" I should have said "fairly certain".
    "Pretty cookies, heart squares all around, yeah!"
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  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    Blockhead wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I don't believe I've said that being active is bad. As I've mentioned, it's about being so overscheduled-out-the-ass that there's no downtime to just breathe, and think, and enjoy some truly free time.
    Can you give me an example of being overscheduled out the ass (experience)
    I say this because my kids are extremely active with activities (soccer,softball,art class,girl scouts). They have something everyday. BUT they also have a TON of down time...
    Fer the love of Pete, we're not on opposing sides here. I've talked about and supported the idea of balance. Downtime. As you mentioned above. As I've mentioned.

    Activity is a wonderful thing, many of us agree on this. Moderation. Like with most anything.

    I don't know how else to put it, so apologies if my point's not getting across after all of my comments in this thread. Thought I was clear, but who knows anymore.
  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,013
    Blockhead wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    Agreed on your first part. I don't think anyone's villifying one way or the other - or any others - just not a bombardment of activities and being continuously on the go.

    As to the last part, agreed again.

    (and let's hope WE are not having our thinking done for us either - as adults, we need to practice our preachings, otherwise we're just squawkboxes)
    What is "bombardment of activities" and why is that bad?
    I don't understand how being ACTIVE is somehow BAD now...
    A "bombardment of activities" is having organized activities (i.e. adult supervised scheduled activities or care) every day after school (which is already 7 hours of supervised activity) and/or on weekends. A LOT of kids are having to live this way these days. There is no time away from adults at all, and no time just for unorganized, unscheduled, unsupervised play. I'm all for putting kids in lessons or on sports teams, but from what I can tell, a lot of parents now have their kids involved in MANY sports teams or lessons, and if they're not there, they're under the direct supervision of their parents, out and about, or going here or there, etc, thus taking up most to all of their free time with organized, supervised, and directed activity. IMO, this does not promote independence or self-reliance.

    My sister does this with her kids, and the result is that my niece and nephew are super clingy and way too emotionally dependent on their mom. They are easily bored, and seek out adults when they are bored instead of thinking of something fun to do on their own. It will not be helpful to them as they get older. They need more time just playing away from mom with their friends or each other or by themselves ... but at this point, they don't really want to be more than 30 feet from adult supervision. They NEVER have to come up with some way to entertain themselves, because someone else is always doing that for them. I'm concerned that they will not have a developed sense of independence, and will not be adequately self-sufficient when they're older. Plus, the boy is clearly going to be a huge momma's boy, so I feel bad for whoever it is he marries eventually! (but oh well. I've never said a word about it to my sister and never will.... my mom agrees with me, and has tried to bring it up gently, but it went nowhere. They'll just continue to have their entire lives directed, and they don't even know that there is another option).
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    brianlux wrote:
    Blockhead wrote:
    brianlux wrote:
    I was just thinking about how my six year old grand niece now has a one year old sister and the six year old helps with the baby. This seems to work well for both girls. My Mom grew up attending a one room school house- all elementary grades taught by one woman under one roof- and the older kids helped teach the younger ones. I'm convinced segregating kids by age is not the best way to go. I've heard of schools that are beginning to have mixed ages work together.
    Why are you "convinced" that segregating kids by age is not the best way to go...
    Partly from my own limited experience- I taught a 5/6th grade combo for two years and saw how having multiple grades worked well- but even more so from talking with other teachers who taught multiple-graded classes who were very enthusiastic about the arrangement. But I'm not a highly qualified education expert so maybe instead of "convinced" I should have said "fairly certain".

    I've heard the same thing, that the "one room schoolhouse" should be brought back, that that sort of individualized learning definitely has its merits.
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    hedonist wrote:
    Blockhead wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I don't believe I've said that being active is bad. As I've mentioned, it's about being so overscheduled-out-the-ass that there's no downtime to just breathe, and think, and enjoy some truly free time.
    Can you give me an example of being overscheduled out the ass (experience)
    I say this because my kids are extremely active with activities (soccer,softball,art class,girl scouts). They have something everyday. BUT they also have a TON of down time...
    Fer the love of Pete, we're not on opposing sides here. I've talked about and supported the idea of balance. Downtime. As you mentioned above. As I've mentioned.

    Activity is a wonderful thing, many of us agree on this. Moderation. Like with most anything.

    I don't know how else to put it, so apologies if my point's not getting across after all of my comments in this thread. Thought I was clear, but who knows anymore.

    I thought you were clear, hedonist and I agree with you. Too much scheduling every minute of a kid's time takes away any sort of freedom a kid has. And isn't childhood supposed to be about that free time to "just be a kid"? My nephew is overscheduled-out-the-ass, he has sports, music lessons and hockey practice at night. So when does the kid do his homework, daydream, do anything else? Is his childhood being stolen out from under him (by his parents no less, who want to live vicariously through him, because they didn't achieve super stardom athlete when they were kids)?
  • i agree with this article, and think it also extends beyond children into anyone who is creative, adults as well. Theres just so much stuff you can do. Watch a Breaking Bad marathon, or watch Mad Men, you can go on your Ipad, you can skype, and use facebook, you can look on wikipedia, you can listen to music, you can download music and movies.

    My own creativity is frequently, and daily hampered by these options. Either I can sit down and do my art, or I can go watch the latest Game of Thrones. I can draw and think or I can listen to music.

    We as a society dont like to get bored anymore. Watch any tv show nowadays. Theres the quick cuts, one scene for 2 seconds, then another scene. And the pace of the music world online also mirrors this. Im sure you all grew up in an age when it was hard to get music, when you got only a few albums a year, and you listened to that one album over and over again. Nowadays, the blogs and websites tout a new band and album daily. And we have access to every single album ever recorded, FOR FREE.

    Part of the creative process is to sit and think, to allow your mind to wander, to just let it go where it wants to go. And if you are constantly worrying about tweets and facebook updates thats a problem.
  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,013
    i agree with this article, and think it also extends beyond children into anyone who is creative, adults as well. Theres just so much stuff you can do. Watch a Breaking Bad marathon, or watch Mad Men, you can go on your Ipad, you can skype, and use facebook, you can look on wikipedia, you can listen to music, you can download music and movies.

    My own creativity is frequently, and daily hampered by these options. Either I can sit down and do my art, or I can go watch the latest Game of Thrones. I can draw and think or I can listen to music.

    We as a society dont like to get bored anymore. Watch any tv show nowadays. Theres the quick cuts, one scene for 2 seconds, then another scene. And the pace of the music world online also mirrors this. Im sure you all grew up in an age when it was hard to get music, when you got only a few albums a year, and you listened to that one album over and over again. Nowadays, the blogs and websites tout a new band and album daily. And we have access to every single album ever recorded, FOR FREE.

    Part of the creative process is to sit and think, to allow your mind to wander, to just let it go where it wants to go. And if you are constantly worrying about tweets and facebook updates thats a problem.
    I agree with everything you said, except for the listening to music part. Listening to music for me inspires creativity, and is in and of itself is a very fulfilling activity that does allow ones mind to wander and think!
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • oh i agree totally with you that listening to music is important, fulfilling, and inspires creativity, but for me, in general its still a passive activity. Its listening to someone else's art and creativity, when I should be doing my own. I dont know if you are a fan of Tool, but they are a band who's explicit goal is exactly what you said, to inspire the listener to think and become creative. But for me, its just as passive as anything else mentioned. Im inspired by Mad Men for example. The elaborate set designs, the clothes and fashion, the way they talk, the writing, the acting. The same could be said for a show like Breaking Bad. Beautiful writing, directing and cinematography. You couldnt ask for a better role model in terms of what does high quality art in 2013 look and sound like. All are essentially fuel for my creativity, but its passive. Im sitting around watching someone else's creative expression.

    The fact we have so many things to waste our time on is the maddening and frustrating part of it all. I have so many things to waste my time on. And all are excuses for me not being creative. As I said, im sure im not the only person here, or in the world, who's said, I want to do some painting and drawing but then get sucked into the 500 channels on HDTV. Its ridiculous when you think about it
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    oh i agree totally with you that listening to music is important, fulfilling, and inspires creativity, but for me, in general its still a passive activity. Its listening to someone else's art and creativity, when I should be doing my own. I dont know if you are a fan of Tool, but they are a band who's explicit goal is exactly what you said, to inspire the listener to think and become creative. But for me, its just as passive as anything else mentioned. Im inspired by Mad Men for example. The elaborate set designs, the clothes and fashion, the way they talk, the writing, the acting. The same could be said for a show like Breaking Bad. Beautiful writing, directing and cinematography. You couldnt ask for a better role model in terms of what does high quality art in 2013 look and sound like. All are essentially fuel for my creativity, but its passive. Im sitting around watching someone else's creative expression.

    The fact we have so many things to waste our time on is the maddening and frustrating part of it all. I have so many things to waste my time on. And all are excuses for me not being creative. As I said, im sure im not the only person here, or in the world, who's said, I want to do some painting and drawing but then get sucked into the 500 channels on HDTV. Its ridiculous when you think about it

    You may have already said it, but the key is to just sit and daydream. That's where creativity really comes from. I read recently that Google actually gives its employees time to take breaks to enable ideas, because there's scientific proof behind the idea that ideas are made when we are doing nothing, rather than doing something.
  • but to further expand on why music nowadays is so "dangerous" to creativity, is just how all encompassing and overwhelming it is. The sheer amount of new music each year is mind boggling and we have access to every single second of it. And it deludes each albums importance. I dont, and it seems like few others in 2013, actually live with and breathe in an album for months on end. listening to it daily. We dont have to. Because by tomorrow this blog will tell you to check out this new band, and that magazine will say check out this new album. And it goes like that, daily. You arent really enjoying a new album. You can't because you are thinking about the next album. I do this all the time and have for years.

    I think that sort of behavior ruins the musical experience of it all. Your mind then doesnt wander and you dont think and arent inspired because it becomes just another thing to waste time on. LIke checking e-mail, or going on facebook. Or waiting for the next Pearl Jam tweet.
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    To get off topic, I agree that Mad Men is inspiring with its creative ideas. But in the end, advertising is nothing but mass manipulation. ;)
  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,013
    edited March 2013
    I'm not sure I understand how an activity that provides enrichment and inspiration is passive. I don't think that it is. Not actually physically creating something doesn't = passive. I totally get your drift musicismylife78, but I'm just not in agreement when it comes to what is passive (and therefore not a wholly positive activity) and what isn't.
    Post edited by PJ_Soul on
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,013
    Jeanwah wrote:
    To get off topic, I agree that Mad Men is inspiring with its creative ideas. But in the end, advertising is nothing but mass manipulation. ;)
    Mad Men is AWESOME. :)
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • Jeanwah wrote:
    oh i agree totally with you that listening to music is important, fulfilling, and inspires creativity, but for me, in general its still a passive activity. Its listening to someone else's art and creativity, when I should be doing my own. I dont know if you are a fan of Tool, but they are a band who's explicit goal is exactly what you said, to inspire the listener to think and become creative. But for me, its just as passive as anything else mentioned. Im inspired by Mad Men for example. The elaborate set designs, the clothes and fashion, the way they talk, the writing, the acting. The same could be said for a show like Breaking Bad. Beautiful writing, directing and cinematography. You couldnt ask for a better role model in terms of what does high quality art in 2013 look and sound like. All are essentially fuel for my creativity, but its passive. Im sitting around watching someone else's creative expression.

    The fact we have so many things to waste our time on is the maddening and frustrating part of it all. I have so many things to waste my time on. And all are excuses for me not being creative. As I said, im sure im not the only person here, or in the world, who's said, I want to do some painting and drawing but then get sucked into the 500 channels on HDTV. Its ridiculous when you think about it



    You may have already said it, but the key is to just sit and daydream. That's where creativity really comes from. I read recently that Google actually gives its employees time to take breaks to enable ideas, because there's scientific proof behind the idea that ideas are made when we are doing nothing, rather than doing something.

    This is most definitely the key to creativity. 100 percent agree. And thats what modern society doesnt do. We can't. We have e-mail, the internet, cell phones, tv etc... And yes Google does that. Google's beliefs are brilliant actually. They believe productivity improves if workers actually care about what they are working on. So the equivilant of a day a week I believe, is spent where the Google staff member can research and work on whatever project they want, and its paid time. They believe in frequent breaks as you say. And their entire office is set up to allow breaks, quiet time, and fun.

    While I do agree with the absolute necessity of taking breaks and quiet time, as you say being essential to coming up with new ideas, I dont necessarily feel like the breakthroughs come when we are doing nothing. Again thats not to discount the statement that breaks and thinking and daydreaming arent essential parts of the creative process, they are. Through daydreaming and thinking you can find out what you like. And many creative people talk about this, that their mind just works in a "different" way. They come up with these wild ideas because they allow it to transpire in their minds. But I also think you talk to any creative person, the thing that seperates the ones who are successful from those who arent, is that the successful ones ALWAYS are working on their craft. Bob Dylan is ALWAYS writing, Sean Penn is always reading screenplays and working and perfecting his acting, Steinbeck was ALWAYS writing, etc...


    I think way more than the "lightning bolt" striking someone with a great idea, its way more common for a creative person to just be constantly working and creating and then stumble upon some sort of idea.
  • PJ_Soul wrote:
    I'm not sure I understand how an activity that provides enrichment and inspiration is passive. I don't think that it is. Not actually physically creating something doesn't = passive. I totally get your drift musicismylife78, but I'm just not in agreement when it comes to what is passive (and therefore not a wholly positive activity) and what isn't.

    Its passive to the extent that it doesnt require anything of us. Seeing a great movie, or hearing a mindblowing song, or reading a beautiful book can absolutely inspire our creative visions, but I dont see a difference in watching tv or reading a book, or going to a concert, or listening to music. Those are where we can get inspiration, and ideas, and the "lash" as it were to make something of our lives, but the next step is totally our own. For me, basically what im saying is those things, others music, others movies, others plays, are great. But thats why its so easy to say "I can do that", and so hard to actually do it.

    When Im listening to The Beatles for example, and Im the biggest fan there is, but if I listen to Abbey Road today, Im going to be inspired and wowed and blown away. I may get some ideas for my own creative pursuits, but at that moment im not working on my own art.

    I think we as a generation spend far more time taking in experiences rather than actually doing or physically participating.

    I get where you are coming from and have believed that for a long time. I think steeping ourselves in others art is essential. I just think for me at least, its easy to spend TOO MUCH time on others art and little to no time on my own. Sitting down to write is hard work, spending the entire day listening to Beatles albums is easy, and while you arent going to find anything that sounds better or more inspiring, its still other peoples art.
    John Lennon created those masterpieces by turning his radio off and writing. And thats easier said than done.
  • i guess what im really confessing is, I like alot of people, spend way more time taking in art, going to shows, listening to music, watching movies and tv, and not enough time doing something that involves me actually creating something of my own. And that we need both equally, but few people, including myself spend as much time on the writing of my own creative visions.
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    While I do agree with the absolute necessity of taking breaks and quiet time, as you say being essential to coming up with new ideas, I dont necessarily feel like the breakthroughs come when we are doing nothing. Again thats not to discount the statement that breaks and thinking and daydreaming arent essential parts of the creative process, they are. Through daydreaming and thinking you can find out what you like. And many creative people talk about this, that their mind just works in a "different" way. They come up with these wild ideas because they allow it to transpire in their minds. But I also think you talk to any creative person, the thing that seperates the ones who are successful from those who arent, is that the successful ones ALWAYS are working on their craft. Bob Dylan is ALWAYS writing, Sean Penn is always reading screenplays and working and perfecting his acting, Steinbeck was ALWAYS writing, etc...


    I think way more than the "lightning bolt" striking someone with a great idea, its way more common for a creative person to just be constantly working and creating and then stumble upon some sort of idea.
    i guess what im really confessing is, I like alot of people, spend way more time taking in art, going to shows, listening to music, watching movies and tv, and not enough time doing something that involves me actually creating something of my own. And that we need both equally, but few people, including myself spend as much time on the writing of my own creative visions.

    Yeah, I hear you here. Truly talented and driven creatives find inspiration in constantly working, constantly creating probably because it's just constantly flowing. Damn, I wish I was one of them! But I'm not, and it is too easy to get inspired by something and then put it off to do something else, or to take in all kinds of music and never to make any (I do jump on the drums for 5 minutes nightly though, I give myself a little credit). But hey, at least we're thinking about it, which gives credit to itself, I believe. :)
  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,013
    i guess what im really confessing is, I like alot of people, spend way more time taking in art, going to shows, listening to music, watching movies and tv, and not enough time doing something that involves me actually creating something of my own. And that we need both equally, but few people, including myself spend as much time on the writing of my own creative visions.
    Well, most people in the world aren't artists or even creative, so there's that. ;) If you're using "we" in an all inclusive sense, most people aren't even capable of what you're saying, so hopefully everyone doesn't need to be creating something of their own in equal amounts with experiencing things, because if so, they are all up shit creek. :lol: So maybe you are speaking in terms of artists only? In any case, there are a lot of things people can do that is "creating something of their own" outside of physically creating art or music or building some shelves... I think creation is a lot more open than that (which is why I disagreed with what is and isn't "passive" before). Not that physically creating things isn't great - it is. But experiencing things in the world can be a wonderful, ACTIVE thing (in a way that I'm having trouble expressing - maybe it's ineffable) that shouldn't be underrated too much.... Not that I'm suggesting sitting in front of the TV for 6 hours is recommendable! :lol: I'm a fairly artistic person myself, and do understand where you're coming from. :)
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    :thumbup: to the last three posters and their posts.

    Great thread, overall.

    (and I too LOVE Tool - inspiring, satisfying...just visceral...and, spurs me when needed and comforts/riles me up, also when needed...I'd say the same about my other beloved musicians/bands - Jack White, PJ, and the like. Hell, toss Mozart and Bach into the mix as well.)

    Music is a strange bird. Gorgeous feathers, and I love their many places in my life :)
  • interesting discussion everyone! I could talk about this stuff all day. Anyways, I'll bring up the example of Tool again. They are just one of those bands, as I say that are just so specially unique because they are really all about inspiring the listener to find the creativity in themselves and do something. Something thats haunted me for years, are clips of their Lateralus tour, immediately after 9/11, and Maynard was speaking I think of the feelings everyone had around that time, this horrific tragedy, but I think also just the feelings audience member felt after listening to Tool play for an hour and a half. He said, and Im paraphrasing here, but he said, "I want you to take these feelings you have, take this energy, and in the coming weeks and months, create and do something positive". I really liked that because its so all encompassing. The positive thing he encouraged was so open ended. You could become an activist, or paint, or draw, or write, or fight for social justice. But more concretely I always took it to mean he was saying, take the inspiration you feel as a result of this concert, and go home and create some of your own art. I think thats an example of what PJSoul you were talking about, and Ive experienced similar situations, usually not stated by the performers or artists themselves, but where you feel like your life has changed after seeing a piece of art and it gives you a new lease on life. Seeing Into the Wild in theaters gave me that for example.
  • MotoDCMotoDC Posts: 947
    i agree with this article, and think it also extends beyond children into anyone who is creative, adults as well. Theres just so much stuff you can do. Watch a Breaking Bad marathon, or watch Mad Men, you can go on your Ipad, you can skype, and use facebook, you can look on wikipedia, you can listen to music, you can download music and movies.

    My own creativity is frequently, and daily hampered by these options. Either I can sit down and do my art, or I can go watch the latest Game of Thrones. I can draw and think or I can listen to music.

    We as a society dont like to get bored anymore. Watch any tv show nowadays. Theres the quick cuts, one scene for 2 seconds, then another scene. And the pace of the music world online also mirrors this. Im sure you all grew up in an age when it was hard to get music, when you got only a few albums a year, and you listened to that one album over and over again. Nowadays, the blogs and websites tout a new band and album daily. And we have access to every single album ever recorded, FOR FREE.

    Part of the creative process is to sit and think, to allow your mind to wander, to just let it go where it wants to go. And if you are constantly worrying about tweets and facebook updates thats a problem.
    Couldn't agree more, but damn it is farking hard to break away from!
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