Engagement rings?

LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
edited July 2012 in All Encompassing Trip
*update.. See my last post. 8-)
Post edited by Unknown User on
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  • Thorns2010Thorns2010 Posts: 2,200
    Obviously it depends on the girl, but I was able to get a nice ring that she loves for a very good price. Why?? Because I didn't go with diamonds!!!

    Now my situation was a little different in that I moved to Australia to be with her and to see if this would work out, with the knowledge that if I wanted to stay and be with her, we would have to get married before my 12 month Visa was up. So she knew I'd be asking, and she was fine without getting a ring, but I wanted to get her something anyway.

    I was able to talk about it with her and *GASP* show her some ideas I was thinking of before I ordered! I decided on getting a ring with amethyst stones and ordered it from an online jewelry store. So while it might not be as 'fancy' as a store bought ring, it did the trick and was very affordable.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Thorns2010 wrote:
    Obviously it depends on the girl, but I was able to get a nice ring that she loves for a very good price. Why?? Because I didn't go with diamonds!!!

    Now my situation was a little different in that I moved to Australia to be with her and to see if this would work out, with the knowledge that if I wanted to stay and be with her, we would have to get married before my 12 month Visa was up. So she knew I'd be asking, and she was fine without getting a ring, but I wanted to get her something anyway.

    I was able to talk about it with her and *GASP* show her some ideas I was thinking of before I ordered! I decided on getting a ring with amethyst stones and ordered it from an online jewelry store. So while it might not be as 'fancy' as a store bought ring, it did the trick and was very affordable.
    I could probably talk with her about it.

    I mean, we've already talked about what we want at our wedding and how many children we are going to have. Maybe I should just ask her what kind of rings she likes. She knows the day is coming, I just think waiting until this summer to make it official feels right.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Also, she's already told me her parents are saving money for our wedding..

    From my understanding, weddings are expensive and I have never really thought about where the money comes from. I know my parents couldn't afford to give any money. If I contribute, I would probably wipe out half of my/our savings. :?



    I'm cool with going down town and having a judge do it, but she wants the fancy, girlie, big wedding. :?
  • Jamminonthe1Jamminonthe1 Posts: 1,243
    Find a family member (living or deceased) with a spare diamond - I got the rock for my wife's ring from her aunt, who had her grandmother's ring. That saved a lot of dough, which helped, since we paid for our own wedding. It's amazing how you can drop nearly 30 grand on a "cheap" wedding in a half a day.

    Best of luck!
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    edited March 2012
    .... but it needs to be meaningful...

    So you don't automatically need to think 'big shiny rock on gold band'? A custom ring made by a goldsmith/silversmith she likes? Or maybe consider newer materials (if she's that kind of girl) - titanium, tungsten carbide.... These incorporating a stone she really likes (which may be diamonds!).

    There are a lot of options out there and they don't have to break the bank either.
  • Just go with your gut. Search around online and go to stores to see what style you like and thinks she will also. Then try to find that style at a price you want to spend. Definitely save your money if your planning on kids, home, etc. 3 kids, house sucks you dry. Need to have a good stash set aside for whatever may come up. Btw, I have 3 girls and already grooming them for destination small weddings. It's an important moment but only one moment in time and no need to put yourselves into financial strain right from the beginning. Good luck!! Trust yourself, you will pick a good one. I hope she is a PJ fan!!
  • DOWNerDOWNer Posts: 60
    I recommend checking out your local shops. With a smaller business, you'll get better service and value for your buck. You might find a cheap ring online, but they won't support you after the sale. Most local stores will size and set your stone at no extra charge with purchase. Also, if you miss the mark on style, you can always take your fiancee back to the store and exchange it for one she loves. Good luck!
    <a href="http://www.artsymcgee.com/"&gt;
    artsymcgee.com</a>
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Find a family member (living or deceased) with a spare diamond - I got the rock for my wife's ring from her aunt, who had her grandmother's ring. That saved a lot of dough, which helped, since we paid for our own wedding. It's amazing how you can drop nearly 30 grand on a "cheap" wedding in a half a day.

    Best of luck!
    30 grand isn't exactly "cheap" :shock: :lol:


    Looking online, it's closer to the higher end of a wedding cost I think.. I saw a few budget weddings for under 10k, but I don't think she'll be happy with that.

    Is it normal just to let her parents take care of the bill? She's in small debt with no savings. I've got a good chunk of change saved, but that would wipe out any 10 to 20% I'd/ We'd want to put down on a home. :?
  • neilybabes86neilybabes86 Posts: 16,057
    just engaged what u need to know
    i post on the board of a band that doesn't exsist anymore .......i need my head examined.......
  • neilybabes86neilybabes86 Posts: 16,057
    honestly..nowadays its popular to take her to pick it out...if u want
    i post on the board of a band that doesn't exsist anymore .......i need my head examined.......
  • Indifference71Indifference71 Posts: 14,823
    honestly..nowadays its popular to take her to pick it out...if u want



    Yeah some of my friends have done that. When I bought the ring for my fiancé, I just knew the type of rings that she didn't like and took it from there.
  • comebackgirlcomebackgirl Posts: 9,885
    Try to get an idea of what she likes...a lot of girls like estate type rings or non-diamond options (pink sapphires, etc) that cost a hell of a lot less than the traditional engagement ring.

    Good luck and congratulations in advance!
    tumblr_mg4nc33pIX1s1mie8o1_400.gif

    "I need your strength for me to be strong...I need your love to feel loved"
  • conmanconman Posts: 7,493
    does she have a sister or very close friends you can ask for help?


    my brothers-in-law asked my other sisters for help when they were picking out a ring
  • Jamminonthe1Jamminonthe1 Posts: 1,243
    Find a family member (living or deceased) with a spare diamond - I got the rock for my wife's ring from her aunt, who had her grandmother's ring. That saved a lot of dough, which helped, since we paid for our own wedding. It's amazing how you can drop nearly 30 grand on a "cheap" wedding in a half a day.

    Best of luck!
    30 grand isn't exactly "cheap" :shock: :lol: :?

    For 210 people on an afternoon, yes it is... though that did include our honeymoon. Still, if our wedding was at night, easily 50 grand.
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,435
    Fuck that...

    My wedding cost me $1000...If that

    And the 2 of us went out for Deep Dish Pizza after the ceremony.....

    hehehe
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • Indifference71Indifference71 Posts: 14,823
    30 grand isn't exactly "cheap" :shock: :lol: :?

    For 210 people on an afternoon, yes it is... though that did include our honeymoon. Still, if our wedding was at night, easily 50 grand.

    Our wedding reception is on a Saturday night for about 230 people...should be right around $30K....crazy how much this stuff costs.
  • Jamminonthe1Jamminonthe1 Posts: 1,243
    30 grand isn't exactly "cheap" :shock: :lol: :?

    For 210 people on an afternoon, yes it is... though that did include our honeymoon. Still, if our wedding was at night, easily 50 grand.

    Our wedding reception is on a Saturday night for about 230 people...should be right around $30K....crazy how much this stuff costs.

    Yeah, that's what I get for living too close to New York City...
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    honestly..nowadays its popular to take her to pick it out...if u want
    Doesn't that ruin the surprise?.. or because we've already discussed our future, is the surprise is the exact moment I do it then?
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Fuck that...

    My wedding cost me $1000...If that

    And the 2 of us went out for Deep Dish Pizza after the ceremony.....

    hehehe
    I agree with this. :lol:


    I told her that the best wedding I ever went to served White Castle........... she gave me the dirtiest look and then proceded to talk about how she will have two different dresses for the wedding and reception. :shock:


    If we can get this thing under 10k I will throw in a couple of k and feel better about it.
  • rival.rival. Posts: 7,775
    working in hotels for 10 years and i see plenty of wedding bills and costs.

    you can be looking at $130 - $160 a plate for a "good" package (salad, app, entree, desert). but then there are obviously additional costs for length and stations during cocktail hour, plus the cost of an open bar. before you know it you could be in the $20K range before you even factor in a band, photographer and all the other crap.

    my only suggestion is keep the guest list VERY reasonable. no need to invite your co-worker's wife's sister's cousin.

    and i do suggest having it at a hotel. one stop shop for you and your guests. no need to worry about paying for a shuttle/transportation, people can get as loaded as they like. plus you should (depending on hotel chain) get a comp room for you and your wife, and usually they throw in a free room for both the parents of the groom and parents of the bride.

    the hotel business is still limping along, so the prices can be very negotiable.

    good luck!
  • Indifference71Indifference71 Posts: 14,823

    Yeah, that's what I get for living too close to New York City...


    Yeah, we're having ours in the burbs outside Chicago...if we were having it downtown in the city, that would be a much different story. Prob looking at $50K for 230 people
  • kellanazziekellanazzie Posts: 1,484
    Yeah, we're having ours in the burbs outside Chicago...if we were having it downtown in the city, that would be a much different story. Prob looking at $50K for 230 people

    WOW!! Makes me glad I got married a long time ago. $3000 for the wedding & pretty much did everything myself. I have a beautiful sapphire ring surrounded by small diamonds & I love it. We had a wedding band custom made to fit one side & on our tenth anniversary had the other side made so its a three band. Not a big diamond person myself.
    Ask her what kind of stone she likes, maybe she isn't deeply invested in having a diamond. There are so many beautiful stones. My husband got mine at a department store & my sapphire is worth quite alot.
    Rather spend the money on the honeymoon, but thats me ;) Good luck!!
  • CareyCarey Posts: 2,361
    Planning on popping the big question later this year, and had never even thought about what, where to look for a ring.

    Is it still a standard one months pay you should plan on spending? Price isn't too big of a factor to me, but I don't really feel the need to spend more than a couple grand, money that could be going to more important things like our first home. She's not very materialistic at all, but it needs to be meaningful.



    Probably won't happen until summer, but any good places/deals I should start checking out for rings? I'm clueless with jewelry. :?

    You can probably get more for your money here:

    Idonowidont.com

    I sold my ring on this site and had no trouble whatsoever. Good luck!
    "Can't buy what I want because it's free..."
  • guacamolejoeguacamolejoe Posts: 2,396
    Fuck that...

    My wedding cost me $1000...If that

    And the 2 of us went out for Deep Dish Pizza after the ceremony.....

    hehehe
    You romantic, you ;)

    My 2nd marriage :o, we eloped in Key West 8-), married on the beach.
    Celebrated at Sloppy Joes & other fine establishments :lol:
    So, What you Giving ?........ (Thanks Speedy, Alesek, & Arq+friends)
    What You Giving

    I suggest you step out on your Porch.
    Run away my son. See it all. Oh, See the World!
  • SPEEDY MCCREADYSPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 25,435
    You romantic, you ;)

    My 2nd marriage :o, we eloped in Key West 8-), married on the beach.
    Celebrated at Sloppy Joes & other fine establishments :lol:

    Nice....
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Carey wrote:
    Planning on popping the big question later this year, and had never even thought about what, where to look for a ring.

    Is it still a standard one months pay you should plan on spending? Price isn't too big of a factor to me, but I don't really feel the need to spend more than a couple grand, money that could be going to more important things like our first home. She's not very materialistic at all, but it needs to be meaningful.



    Probably won't happen until summer, but any good places/deals I should start checking out for rings? I'm clueless with jewelry. :?

    You can probably get more for your money here:

    Idonowidont.com

    I sold my ring on this site and had no trouble whatsoever. Good luck!
    Brilliant site!


    just hope the rings aren't cursed. :lol:

    and hope she wouldn't find out where I got it. 8-)
  • SuziemaySuziemay Posts: 11,168
    Find a family member (living or deceased) with a spare diamond - I got the rock for my wife's ring from her aunt, who had her grandmother's ring. That saved a lot of dough, which helped, since we paid for our own wedding. It's amazing how you can drop nearly 30 grand on a "cheap" wedding in a half a day.

    Best of luck!
    30 grand isn't exactly "cheap" :shock: :lol: :?

    For 210 people on an afternoon, yes it is... though that did include our honeymoon. Still, if our wedding was at night, easily 50 grand.
    :shock: :shock: I am totally eloping and then having a dance party :D

    OP, I think you should take your girl to pick out a ring. It can still be a surprise in when you propose and how you choose to propose. And if she is not materialistic, don't try to buy her something super pricey, just buy her what she likes and don't place any worth on yourself in how much you pay for that thing.

    Congratulations (in advance!).
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Is it wrong for me to wait until at least this summer for proposal even though we've already discussed our future together?

    I'm not going to leave her hanging for 3 to 5 months, am I? :?

    Ladies, is having a timetable like this reasonable? She's pretty excited about everything, but we've only been dating for a year and a half.. I hope I'm not making her think any day now, but soon, sometime later this year feels right to make it official.

    She still hasn't met my Dad, but before the end of this month she will.. and she'll be meeting my close childhood friends next month as well as moving in with me.. after these last few things and living together a few months just feels like the right time to me.
  • PJ-CubsPJ-Cubs Posts: 3,316
    Suziemay wrote:
    OP, I think you should take your girl to pick out a ring. It can still be a surprise in when you propose and how you choose to propose. And if she is not materialistic, don't try to buy her something super pricey, just buy her what she likes and don't place any worth on yourself in how much you pay for that thing.

    Congratulations (in advance!).


    I agree with Suziemay - go ring shipping with her (but make it real casual - "just lookin for ideas") and then surprise her later with the a cool, well-planned proposal
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    PJ-Cubs wrote:
    Suziemay wrote:
    OP, I think you should take your girl to pick out a ring. It can still be a surprise in when you propose and how you choose to propose. And if she is not materialistic, don't try to buy her something super pricey, just buy her what she likes and don't place any worth on yourself in how much you pay for that thing.

    Congratulations (in advance!).


    I agree with Suziemay - go ring shipping with her (but make it real casual - "just lookin for ideas") and then surprise her later with the a cool, well-planned proposal
    Thats my next dilemma.. where/how to propose.. I always wanted to propose where we met, but it was at a Buffalo Wild Wings. :lol:8-)
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