Was I just let down gently?

pjfan31

So bit of background,

Met this girl, while I was doing some prac teaching. She was a casual, I was on a block. Turns out we share a mutual friend who wanted to set us up. This girl is really cute, and nice. I am about a year off being a teacher.. so both heading in the same direction....

So she tells my friend this week, that she liked me and thought that I was 'really nice and very very funny'

So old Cassanova here asks her out, and today I get this reply

'hey, sorry for the late reply, been a really busy week. Pretty flat out this time of year and my weekends are booked up. I will let you know if they free up'

Now I'm thinking, well, that's a nice way of saying no, and I'll move on. Our mutual friend is saying that she is genuinely flat out and to stick with it...

I just can't envisage her 'letting me know' when they free up...

It's strange I keep telling myself 'oh I don't care plenty more fish in the sea', but I clearly do. She seems like a really nice girl...

Thoughts_Arrive

Another case of a chick playing mind games.
I really can't work them out.
They show they are keen, tell others, yet don't get back to you.
Same happened to me with this chick who apparently had a crush on me in high school.
We reconnected on FB and she was eager to catch up with me, so we did, seemed like it went well.
Then she never returned my phone call when I tried to set up a second date.
They do my head in.

pjfan31

Her loss,

I would have burnt her a copy of all my bootlegs

I'm tempted just to send her a message back... like 'yeah no worries' blah blah If it strikes up a convo, then cool. Plus I will get my friend to do some groundwork...

Thoughts_Arrive

So hard to find a mrs thesedays.

sparky_fry

who understands girls :?: the thing with guys is that we'll always make time if we're interested in a girl

81

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

Another case of a chick playing mind games.
I really can't work them out.
They show they are keen, tell others, yet don't get back to you.
Same happened to me with this chick who apparently had a crush on me in high school.
We reconnected on FB and she was eager to catch up with me, so we did, seemed like it went well.
Then she never returned my phone call when I tried to set up a second date.
They do my head in.

Look on the bright side....it made for a good thread

Thoughts_Arrive

81 wrote:

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

Another case of a chick playing mind games.
I really can't work them out.
They show they are keen, tell others, yet don't get back to you.
Same happened to me with this chick who apparently had a crush on me in high school.
We reconnected on FB and she was eager to catch up with me, so we did, seemed like it went well.
Then she never returned my phone call when I tried to set up a second date.
They do my head in.

Look on the bright side....it made for a good thread

really?...

Thoughts_Arrive

pjfan31 if she was interested in you she would have dropped her plans for the weekend to go out with you.
I think your mate is probably shit talking....

81

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

81 wrote:

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

Another case of a chick playing mind games.
I really can't work them out.
They show they are keen, tell others, yet don't get back to you.
Same happened to me with this chick who apparently had a crush on me in high school.
We reconnected on FB and she was eager to catch up with me, so we did, seemed like it went well.
Then she never returned my phone call when I tried to set up a second date.
They do my head in.

Look on the bright side....it made for a good thread

really?...

It was entertaining

Thoughts_Arrive

I can't seem to recall the entertainment aspect of it...

conman

if she really liked you, you would know it..... move on

SVRDhand13

Yes.

AzWicker

Hell, don't give up so easily...

I would make another effort and then if it is the same result, then let it go. She may want a guy who will put a little effort into things...

PKTrekGirl

sparky_fry wrote:

who understands girls :?: the thing with guys is that we'll always make time if we're interested in a girl

I'd wager good money that every girl reading this post on this board is thinking "Back at you!" Trust me - we are just as confused by men as you are by women. :P

stargirl69

PKTrekGirl wrote:

sparky_fry wrote:

who understands girls :?: the thing with guys is that we'll always make time if we're interested in a girl

I'd wager good money that every girl reading this post on this board is thinking "Back at you!" Trust me - we are just as confused by men as you are by women. :P

But yes I think she is letting you down gently.If I am interested in someone I make sure I will have time to go on a date.

Don't give up though

PKTrekGirl

^ I am inclined to agree with stargirl. *nods*

But like she said, that does not mean you should give up. Try a couple of more times, and if it still seems like she might not be that into you, back off. But you are not to that point yet. Give her a couple of more chances to make the determination that you are a nice guy.

pjfan31

Yeh well, it is an interesting one.... If I didn't have the inside word from our mutual friend, there would be no doubt it was a let down... And as someone suggested my friend was talking shit, I don't think so. She wouldn't do that.

I'm 50/50 on this one...

PKTrekGirl

^ Well, the 'inside word' is only as good as the combined truthfulness of 2 relationships - your inside friend and this girl...and your inside friend and you.

Now, I don't think it is by any means hopeless - she did leave an opening, after all. Which is why I don't think you should give up. I think you still have a chance to make more of an impression. I mean, if she really didn't like you at all, you wouldn't have even gotten what you got.

But girls are not unlike guys in this regard - if we REALLY like a guy, we make time. Most of us would re-arrange our entire schedules to make time for a guy we really, really, REALLY liked.

That's just human nature, you know?

Presumably, by posting this thread, you wanted people's honest opinions. And mine is that you haven't wowed her yet...but that you still have a chance to do so. She hasn't said 'no'...but she hasn't really said 'yes' either. Don't give up completely until she gives you a clear yes or no.

That would be my advice. For whatever that's worth.

I do hope it works out for you though!

AzWicker

Sometimes people are really busy, especially this time of year.

LikeAnOcean

She's probably likes you. She's probably attracted to you. The chemistry just may not be quite there.


She'll go out of the way to make time for you if there's a real bond. Don't waste too much time on it. I've made that mistake too many times. You did your part. See if she bites back.


It's nature. Try not to think about it too much.

LikeAnOcean

PKTrekGirl wrote:

^ Well, the 'inside word' is only as good as the combined truthfulness of 2 relationships - your inside friend and this girl...and your inside friend and you.

Now, I don't think it is by any means hopeless - she did leave an opening, after all. Which is why I don't think you should give up. I think you still have a chance to make more of an impression. I mean, if she really didn't like you at all, you wouldn't have even gotten what you got.

But girls are not unlike guys in this regard - if we REALLY like a guy, we make time. Most of us would re-arrange our entire schedules to make time for a guy we really, really, REALLY liked.

That's just human nature, you know?

Presumably, by posting this thread, you wanted people's honest opinions. And mine is that you haven't wowed her yet...but that you still have a chance to do so. She hasn't said 'no'...but she hasn't really said 'yes' either. Don't give up completely until she gives you a clear yes or no.

That would be my advice. For whatever that's worth.

I do hope it works out for you though!

This ^^^


In other words, you could probably have it if you keep trying, but she's just not really REALLY into you.

I'd rather have a girl who is really into me than one who has to think about it.