Why are we friends with these people?

eyedclaar · 2011 10

norm wrote:

eyedclaar wrote:

I'm not friends with those people. My tolerance level for BS is pretty much zero. Probably why I have about 3 friends.

i can count on 1 finger how many friends i have

:oops:

I was clearly stretching the truth. I have two friends and a brother I'm close to... My ex band. Hell, even the two friends grow more distant by the day, one in particular.

dcfaithful · 2011 10

eyedclaar wrote:

norm wrote:

eyedclaar wrote:

I'm not friends with those people. My tolerance level for BS is pretty much zero. Probably why I have about 3 friends.

i can count on 1 finger how many friends i have

:oops:

I was clearly stretching the truth. I have two friends and a brother I'm close to... My ex band. Hell, even the two friends grow more distant by the day, one in particular.

Come see Drive-By Truckers with the lady and I in March @ The Knitting Factory. I'll buy you a friendship beer.

norm · 2011 10

eyedclaar wrote:

norm wrote:

eyedclaar wrote:

I'm not friends with those people. My tolerance level for BS is pretty much zero. Probably why I have about 3 friends.

i can count on 1 finger how many friends i have

:oops:

I was clearly stretching the truth. I have two friends and a brother I'm close to... My ex band. Hell, even the two friends grow more distant by the day, one in particular.

well i was exaggerating too...i have a friend for the thumb

stargirl69 · 2011 10

norm wrote:

:(
just start backing away from this guy, dc...he sounds very toxic and no one needs that in their life

Well said Norm and I love your avatar ... it makes me smile EVERY time I see it

dcfaithful ... how long have you been friends?
I attended Transpersonal Therapy and one of the issues that rose for me was one of my friendships that I had been in for 24 years ... but I had grown to despise this person and what they have become over that time.
My therapist asked me a very simple question that you may want to ask yourself.
"If you had never met this person before and had to spend a day with them as they are now ... at the end of that day would you want to be friends with them?
If the answers no .... leave the friendship,it's ran it's course,we'd leave a intimate relationships easier than we leave some friendships ... if the answers yes ... acknowledge and build on what has gone wrong

Just something to think about

... hope it helps

Who Princess · 2011 10

norm wrote:

seriously, i had/have a friend like this...i've known him since the 4th grade...was always the loud, obnoxious, trying to be funny guy...and sometimes he was funny and fun to hang out with...but after high school it became harder and harder to hang out with him because we were growing up and he wasn't...it no longer was funny or fun...eventually he got married and had a litter of kids and we 'speak' now and then on facebook...i've actually been thinking about getting together with him to see if he's changed

just start backing away from this guy, dc...he sounds very toxic and no one needs that in their life

I think this is a really good description of why friends like this add nothing to your life. Most people eventually grow up but there always seems to be someone who completely lacks maturity. In a few years, this guy will be hanging out with people about 10 years younger than he is because they'll be the only ones who can tolerate him. He will probably marry someone much younger because she finds him "fun" and doesn't realize what a loser he is. Seen it happen.

Lots of things could be at work here. Maybe he's a budding alcoholic. Maybe he's just an asshole. Whatever the case, I doubt you'll regret ridding yourself of him. Even if you run into him at other things, you don't have to make any excuses for yourself. Just tell him he wasn't any kind of a friend. When he tries to put it on you, say something like "Oh, yeah, everything has to be about YOU." Better yet, just walk away.

BinauralJam · 2011 10

I had a group of four close freinds(thick as theives for 5 years), met my girl and started hangin less and less with them, one day they gave me an ultimatum, Show up at such and such time and at such and such place or your out of the group, so i said ok, when i left that night i never had any intention of showing up, freinds don't give friends ultimatums.

and those were 4 pretty cool guys, your buddy sounds like a dick, fuck him.

norm · 2011 10

BinauralJam wrote:

I had a group of four close freinds(thick as theives for 5 years), met my girl and started hangin less and less with them, one day they gave me an ultimatum, Show up at such and such time and at such and such place or your out of the group, so i said ok, when i left that night i never had any intention of showing up, freinds don't give friends ultimatums.

and those were 4 pretty cool guys, your buddy sounds like a dick, fuck him.

to quote ms. wes c addle "what the fucking fuck?!" :wtf: :roll:

what kind of assholes demand a friend to hang with them...you do that to me, be prepared to never see my fat ass again

81 · 2011 10

dcfaithful wrote:

Come see Drive-By Truckers

you're not coming to chicago to see them.

BinauralJam · 2011 10

norm wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

I had a group of four close freinds(thick as theives for 5 years), met my girl and started hangin less and less with them, one day they gave me an ultimatum, Show up at such and such time and at such and such place or your out of the group, so i said ok, when i left that night i never had any intention of showing up, freinds don't give friends ultimatums.

and those were 4 pretty cool guys, your buddy sounds like a dick, fuck him.

to quote ms. wes c addle "what the fucking fuck?!" :wtf: :roll:

what kind of assholes demand a friend to hang with them...you do that to me, be prepared to never see my fat ass again

Never saw or heard from any of them again, whats worse, when we started hangin two of them were married and and three of us were single, we would always work around the two married guys to make the group work, but then i meet a girl while these two get divorced and all the rules change.

They weren't bad guys though, just going in different directions.

pjhawks · 2011 10

BinauralJam wrote:

norm wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

I had a group of four close freinds(thick as theives for 5 years), met my girl and started hangin less and less with them, one day they gave me an ultimatum, Show up at such and such time and at such and such place or your out of the group, so i said ok, when i left that night i never had any intention of showing up, freinds don't give friends ultimatums.

and those were 4 pretty cool guys, your buddy sounds like a dick, fuck him.

to quote ms. wes c addle "what the fucking fuck?!" :wtf: :roll:

what kind of assholes demand a friend to hang with them...you do that to me, be prepared to never see my fat ass again

Never saw or heard from any of them again, whats worse, when we started hangin two of them were married and and three of us were single, we would always work around the two married guys to make the group work, but then i meet a girl while these two get divorced and all the rules change.

They weren't bad guys though, just going in different directions.

\

to make a demand like that is just selfish. i've always said friends shouldn't need a scorecard. it's not about how many times you see or talk to someone but how you talk and see someone and your actions towards them. as you get older lives can do in different directions but there are a few guys i am friends with that i would still kill for even if i only talk to them a few times a year. hard to explain that i guess but i think you know it when you see it or have it.

SENROCK · 2011 10

People that act like that are just begging to get knocked out.
As for the original post mentioning depressing posts......there used to be 2 specific people that would post EVERY DAMN DAY about something negative. it was always a thread or post about them being alone or not having enough money to WALK to the corner store..... :? It was annoying. But instead of trying to make a situation better, they just looked for sympathy and a LOT of people in the AET gave it to them. You can only offer good advice or help someone so much. Good luck getting rid of that guy!

norm · 2011 10

SENROCK wrote:

People that act like that are just begging to get knocked out.
As for the original post mentioning depressing posts......there used to be 2 specific people that would post EVERY DAMN DAY about something negative. it was always a thread or post about them being alone or not having enough money to WALK to the corner store..... :? It was annoying. But instead of trying to make a situation better, they just looked for sympathy and a LOT of people in the AET gave it to them. You can only offer good advice or help someone so much. Good luck getting rid of that guy!

It's a tea disease,... and they're all green

:P

unlost dogs · 2011 10

From the perspective of someone who's lived twice as long as you ( :oops: :shock: :oops: ) I can say that you're at one of those natural transition periods. Early 20s. This is a point where some folks go one way, others go another. Maybe you travel the roads together, maybe you meet up again in the future. Maybe you don't.

If I were you, and this guy had been a friend, I would be walking away. Unless the person has some kind of major change in attitude, gets some help, whatever it is he needs to be a semi-appropriate individual, you don't need to feel responsible.

Of course I write this rocking in my granny chair, thinking, "I'm pretty sure dcfaithful doesn't have impossible standards and would cut the guy a lot of slack..."

In all seriousness, it sounds like it's time for you to move on from this guy.

eyedclaar · 2011 10

norm wrote:

SENROCK wrote:

People that act like that are just begging to get knocked out.
As for the original post mentioning depressing posts......there used to be 2 specific people that would post EVERY DAMN DAY about something negative. it was always a thread or post about them being alone or not having enough money to WALK to the corner store..... :? It was annoying. But instead of trying to make a situation better, they just looked for sympathy and a LOT of people in the AET gave it to them. You can only offer good advice or help someone so much. Good luck getting rid of that guy!

It's a tea disease,... and they're all green :P

Never would have guessed...

dcfaithful · 2011 10

81 wrote:

dcfaithful wrote:

Come see Drive-By Truckers

you're not coming to chicago to see them.

I'd love to, but Boise, ID is much more affordable for us. :(

unlost dogs · 2011 10

dcfaithful wrote:

81 wrote:

dcfaithful wrote:

Come see Drive-By Truckers

you're not coming to chicago to see them.

I'd love to, but Boise, ID is much more affordable for us. :(

Be careful if you go to Boise.

*eyed rubs his hands together with an evil cackle*

dcfaithful · 2011 10

unlost dogs wrote:

Be careful if you go to Boise.

*eyed rubs his hands together with an evil cackle*

I offered a friendship beer. Anyone who harms a guy that offers that is a cold bastard. :P

eyedclaar · 2011 10

dcfaithful wrote:

unlost dogs wrote:

Be careful if you go to Boise.

*eyed rubs his hands together with an evil cackle*

I offered a friendship beer. Anyone who harms a guy that offers that is a cold bastard. :P

When was this friendship beer offered? Uneasy is the truce made with a utahan...

norm · 2011 10

eyedclaar wrote:

dcfaithful wrote:

unlost dogs wrote:

Be careful if you go to Boise.

*eyed rubs his hands together with an evil cackle*

I offered a friendship beer. Anyone who harms a guy that offers that is a cold bastard. :P

When was this friendship beer offered? Uneasy is the truce made with a utahan...

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/679770/

eyedclaar · 2011 10

norm wrote:

When was this friendship beer offered? Uneasy is the truce made with a utahan...

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/679770/[/quote]

Exactly... Wait, what?

BinauralJam · 2011 10

dcfaithful · 2011 10

eyedclaar wrote:

dcfaithful wrote:

unlost dogs wrote:

Be careful if you go to Boise.

*eyed rubs his hands together with an evil cackle*

I offered a friendship beer. Anyone who harms a guy that offers that is a cold bastard. :P

When was this friendship beer offered? Uneasy is the truce made with a utahan...

I can see why, I can. But trust me...you won't regret making a truce with this Utahn.

JOEJOEJOE · 2011 10

Give him the gift of the truth.....tell him how his actions push people away. That is all you can do. If he refuses to take responsibility, that is his problem.

I had a friend who used to complain that all guys want to do is sleep with her. I reminded her that she is very flirtatious, and that by fooling around with guys soon after meeting them, she sends the wrong message.

She accused me of calling her a whore, and never spoke to me again.

norm · 2011 10

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

Give him the gift of the truth.....tell him how his actions push people away. That is all you can do. If he refuses to take responsibility, that is his problem.

I had a friend who used to complain that all guys want to do is sleep with her. I reminded her that she is very flirtatious, and that by fooling around with guys soon after meeting them, she sends the wrong message.

She accused me of calling her a whore, and never spoke to me again.

serves you right for stating the obvious!

JOEJOEJOE · 2011 10

norm wrote:

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

Give him the gift of the truth.....tell him how his actions push people away. That is all you can do. If he refuses to take responsibility, that is his problem.

I had a friend who used to complain that all guys want to do is sleep with her. I reminded her that she is very flirtatious, and that by fooling around with guys soon after meeting them, she sends the wrong message.

She accused me of calling her a whore, and never spoke to me again.

serves you right for stating the obvious!

When I saw that you responded, I thought that you were gonna ask for her number!

norm · 2011 10

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

norm wrote:

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

Give him the gift of the truth.....tell him how his actions push people away. That is all you can do. If he refuses to take responsibility, that is his problem.

I had a friend who used to complain that all guys want to do is sleep with her. I reminded her that she is very flirtatious, and that by fooling around with guys soon after meeting them, she sends the wrong message.

She accused me of calling her a whore, and never spoke to me again.

serves you right for stating the obvious!

When I saw that you responded, I thought that you were gonna ask for her number!

thought about that but who needs a serial flirt

RKCNDY · 2011 10

norm wrote:

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

norm wrote:

serves you right for stating the obvious!

When I saw that you responded, I thought that you were gonna ask for her number!

thought about that but who needs a serial flirt

ok, I won't flirt with you at the show norm....

dcfaithful · 2011 10

4and20 wrote:

norm wrote:

thought about that but who needs a serial flirt

ok, I won't flirt with you at the show norm....

I'll flirt with you norm, if it'll make you feel better.

You'll have to buy me about 8 beers before I do so.

JOEJOEJOE · 2011 10

dcfaithful wrote:

4and20 wrote:

norm wrote:

thought about that but who needs a serial flirt

ok, I won't flirt with you at the show norm....

I'll flirt with you norm, if it'll make you feel better.

You'll have to buy me about 8 beers before I do so.

Looks like we will have a fight on our hands!

I will BUY Norm 8 beers just for the pleasure of flirting with him!

Sorry to hijack the thread, but the affection of Norm is priceless, so a fellas gotta do what a fellas gotta do!

dcfaithful · 2011 10

JOEJOEJOE wrote:

Looks like we will have a fight on our hands!

I will BUY Norm 8 beers just for the pleasure of flirting with him!

Sorry to hijack the thread, but the affection of Norm is priceless, so a fellas gotta do what a fellas gotta do!

It's quite alright, I've heard stories about Norm. He's one crazy cat. I've also heard you should keep some penicillin around if you're going to accept his affection though.

:shock:

Why are we friends with these people?

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