Help Write My Bio for Book #2 Back Cover

eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
edited November 2010 in All Encompassing Trip
What the hell do I say about myself in 5 or 6 sentences?

Daniel enjoys outdoor adventures, long walks on the beach, holding hands by a campfire, and would most likely kill you and bury your corpse deep in the dark woods for a mug of hot tang.
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  • polaris_xpolaris_x Posts: 13,554
    Daniel would otherwise be called a natural outdoorsmen with an affinity for large animals except it was that love of large animals that put him in minimum security prison and the first ever restraining order for a mama grizzly bear in Yellowstone named Tessa.
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    600full-brokeback-mountain-photo.jpg

    Too Soon?
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    polaris_x wrote:
    Daniel would otherwise be called a natural outdoorsmen with an affinity for large animals except it was that love of large animals that put him in minimum security prison and the first ever restraining order for a mama grizzly bear in Yellowstone named Tessa.

    That's just awesome! I might have to use it...
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  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    600full-brokeback-mountain-photo.jpg

    Too Soon?

    Yes. You only get to use that joke once every 6 months...
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  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    s_marty-stouffer-wild-america-mountain-goat.jpg
  • chadwickchadwick up my assPosts: 21,157
    i hated that part of book writing
    when it happened to me i was emailed
    "hey man, where is your (what is it actually called) one thingy about yourself for the backcover?"

    i wrote it out in 10 minutes on the spot
    i wish i could change it
    same as the index
    put it together in 119 seconds
    wears me the fuck out...

    so many learning experiences and stepping stones in this life
    the greatest thing i have ever learned..."who gives a fuck"

    i surely do not...

    that above bit is for is for your book...
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."

    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    bart2.jpg
  • normnorm I'm always home. I'm uncool.Posts: 31,139
    If you were to encounter Daniel in the back country you might think you have come upon a cross between Henry Rollins and the unabomber. And you would be correct.
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    norm wrote:
    If you were to encounter Daniel in the back country you might think you have come upon a cross between Henry Rollins and the unabomber. And you would be correct.


    Nice!
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    lewis.jpg
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    bart2.jpg

    That's the bear that took out the restraining order against me!
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  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    norm wrote:
    If you were to encounter Daniel in the back country you might think you have come upon a cross between Henry Rollins and the unabomber. And you would be correct.


    Nice!

    Agreed! Norm, did you pick out the unabomber poem in the first book?
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    lewis.jpg

    I said write the bio. I have the picture!
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • rollingsrollings unknownPosts: 6,808
    edited March 2011
    bio #2
    Post edited by rollings on
  • chadwickchadwick up my assPosts: 21,157
    dear reader,

    thank you

    yours truly,
    bear foot
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."

    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    i'm trying to inspire everybody else, i can't write.
  • chadwickchadwick up my assPosts: 21,157
    dear reader,

    c.j. krueger has amazing poetry
    you can send me the $23.99 for his book
    i'll get you a copy ASAP

    thank you,
    captain idaho's pen
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."

    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    chadwick wrote:
    dear reader,

    c.j. krueger has amazing poetry
    you can send me the $23.99 for his book
    i'll get you a copy ASAP

    thank you,
    captain idaho's pen

    Hell, it was worth a shot, Chadwick. ;)
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • How did they allow all you scalawags back into this place?! I thought the AET was an 81, BJ, chadwick and eyed-free zone going forward...damn.
    "FF, I've heard the droning about the Sawx being the baby dolls. Yeah, I get it, you guys invented baseball and suffered forever. I get it." -JearlPam0925
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    Half Full wrote:
    How about this,
    But call it

    Removing Two More

    Without warning
    Or explanation
    This sickness seeps
    From my nightmares
    Staining converging clouds
    And kicking up hurricanes
    In decomposing eyes

    A disease
    That will one day find
    These hands
    Wrapped around the neck
    Of another
    Or a hunting knife
    Buried to the hilt
    In gurgling throats
    And at times
    Like this
    With blood pounding
    Through my temples
    It begins to feel like
    The only cure


    Maybe you can add...

    That or reading this book

    (To cite, this piece was written by Eyedclaar.)

    Good lord, that guy sounds calm and rationale.
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  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    How did they allow all you scalawags back into this place?! I thought the AET was an 81, BJ, chadwick and eyed-free zone going forward...damn.

    Like I said, nobody has the authority to ban me!
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    How did they allow all you scalawags back into this place?! I thought the AET was an 81, BJ, chadwick and eyed-free zone going forward...damn.


    Give it time. I do beleive i can no longer feign ignorance of any the rules. Go to the well enough times, dries up on ya.
  • unlost dogsunlost dogs Greater BostonPosts: 12,553
    It's just a first stab, but see what you think:

    Daniel was born on (insert birth date) in (insert place of birth). After serving as hall monitor in sixth grade, he embarked upon a distinguished thread-surfing career and is recognized as one of the finest 10 Club posters in the world. He is a denizen of the AET at http://community.pearljam.com, curmudgeon on The Porch and worthy sparring partner on The Moving Train despite his temporary banishment in 2010.

    He is, however, well-beloved throughout the Pearl Jam community as the owner of an acid mine and author of such classic works as Reading Entrails and Justifiable Homicide. He did not die on Sept. 2, 1973 at the age of 81.


    This is what they used for J.R.R. Tolkein on the inside back cover of my paperback version of 'The Lord of the Rings." I made slight modifications for you. (He served in the First World War, nothing in his bio about being a hall monitor. And he was a professor with an academic career at a bunch of colleges where they faculty wear black robes. And, as far as I know you're not.)

    Also, I made it all in present tense, since, you know, you're not dead yet.
    15 years of sharks 06/30/08 (MA), 05/17/10 (Boston), 09/03/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/04/11 (Alpine Valley), 09/30/12 (Missoula), 07/19/13 (Wrigley), 10/15/13 (Worcester), 10/16/13 (Worcester), 10/25/13 (Hartford), 12/4/13 (Vancouver), 12/6/13 (Seattle), 6/26/14 (Berlin), 6/28/14 (Stockholm), 10/16/14 (Detroit)
  • polaris_xpolaris_x Posts: 13,554
    eyedclaar wrote:
    polaris_x wrote:
    Daniel would otherwise be called a natural outdoorsmen with an affinity for large animals except it was that love of large animals that put him in minimum security prison and the first ever restraining order for a mama grizzly bear in Yellowstone named Tessa.

    That's just awesome! I might have to use it...

    it would be an honour ... :lol:
  • Daniel originally hails from the Upper East Side of Manhattan where he attended a private High School for fancy boys. He played the lead in HMS Pinafore and was a member of the school's secret society. In 2003, Daniel had a nervous breakdown which caused him to believe he was Davey Crockett and currently his whereabouts are unkown.
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    He did not die on Sept. 2, 1973 at the age of 81.
    [/i]

    I appreciate the time and effort, but I'm still ratting you out! Mods, she used a forbidden number in her post!
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    Daniel originally hails from the Upper East Side of Manhattan where he attended a private High School for fancy boys. He played the lead in HMS Pinafore and was a member of the school's secret society. In 2003, Daniel had a nervous breakdown which caused him to believe he was Davey Crockett and currently his whereabouts are unkown.

    I think I'll just put a few on the back cover and tell the readers to choose one... :lol:
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

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  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    Daniel originally hails from the Upper East Side of Manhattan where he attended a private High School for fancy boys. He played the lead in HMS Pinafore and was a member of the school's secret society. In 2003, Daniel had a nervous breakdown which caused him to believe he was Davey Crockett and currently his whereabouts are unkown.



    Why do i believe this...
  • RKCNDYRKCNDY Seattle, WAPosts: 31,013
    Daniel enjoys the outdoors and eating paste. His free time involves caring for his pack of wolverines that live in his basement, and running around in the buff while camping to 'become one with nature'. Inspiration for his work come from antagonizing others on internet forums. Daniel lives in the sticks of Idaho with his wilderness princess, wolverines, a bear, a mountain goat, 3 dogs and a bevy of other woodland creatures. He aspires to retire as a hermit in an undisclosed acid mine.
    The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

    - Christopher McCandless
  • mysticweedmysticweed Posts: 3,669
    Daniel originally hails from the Upper East Side of Manhattan where he attended a private High School for fancy boys. He played the lead in HMS Pinafore and was a member of the school's secret society. In 2003, Daniel had a nervous breakdown which caused him to believe he was Davey Crockett and currently his whereabouts are unkown.

    add to that
    what a devout christian he is
    :mrgreen:
    fuck 'em if they can't take a joke

    "what a long, strange trip it's been"
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