sacrifices for your boyfriend/girlfriend

decides2dream

Rygar wrote:

I agree with age, but not I think it's a bit early to jump to signs of mental problems
I'd give him a chance to see the light first

nah, just very needy.
hopefully he will see the light, and it;s a change to grow, mature, be less needy....and would actually benefit the relationship. i do agree, ultimatums are rarely a good idea, but most especially in a young/early relationship....too controlling/limiting. bad sign. but you bet, he does have the opportunity to turn that around.

Rygar

decides2dream wrote:

ultimatums are rarely a good idea

Agreed!

stargirl69

I understand your point but I wouldn't entirely ignore early signs of a possible imbalance.Think age (youth) may be a factor [/quote]
I agree with age, but not I think it's a bit early to jump to signs of mental problems
I'd give him a chance to see the light first[/quote]

:shock: ... Oh Jeez I didn't mean a "mental problem" imbalance :? I meant an imbalance in the relationship.Calling the shot's,ultamatum,that kind of stuff ain't good.

decides2dream

stargirl69 wrote:

:shock: ... Oh Jeez I didn't mean a "mental problem" imbalance :? I meant an imbalance in the relationship.Calling the shot's,ultamatum,that kind of stuff ain't good.

power-trippy stuff. yep. not a good sign. relationships should be well-balanced, no one person should make all the decisions, exert control, call all the shots as it were....at ANY age, but most especially a young age.

stargirl69

decides2dream wrote:

stargirl69 wrote:

:shock: ... Oh Jeez I didn't mean a "mental problem" imbalance :? I meant an imbalance in the relationship.Calling the shot's,ultamatum,that kind of stuff ain't good.

power-trippy stuff. yep. not a good sign. relationships should be well-balanced, no one person should make all the decisions, exert control, call all the shots as it were....at ANY age, but most especially a young age.

Absolutely

Lauri

GO!!!!!

As you said yourself, if you end up breaking up, you will regret not going. And I believe that you truly love your boyfriend now. But you are in college, you are very young, and the fact is, there is a high probability that you will break up someday. On the flip side, you could end up spending the rest of your lives together, and then a school year apart is NOTHING.

Your boyfriend is being a baby. You will go abroad, you will have the experience you have dreamed of for yourself, and if the relationship suffers then it wasn't the ideal relationship anyway, so no loss.

haffajappa

I'm not panicking, application dates aren't for another semester from now.

I think he is not in a very good place right now and needs me more than usual. I don't want to paint him as needy or controlling, that's not what he is. He is in a really tough situation right now with work and family, but I know that will change in a few weeks (even though he doesn't think so).

I'm not approaching him about the subject for a few more weeks since I have time. Once he settles into his new jobs (he just graduated but has had a hard time finding work until now - so he has no money and is very stressed) then he'll be pre-occupied and thinking about grad school. When we were snowboarding last year we talked about me leaving for a year while he went to school. Everything was fine then, so I know its just a phase right now in a tough time that he doesn't want to let go.

Lol or maybe he just is mental!

Rygar

stargirl69 wrote:

:shock: ... Oh Jeez I didn't mean a "mental problem" imbalance :? I meant an imbalance in the relationship.Calling the shot's,ultamatum,that kind of stuff ain't good.

Oh, my bad

stargirl69

Rygar wrote:

stargirl69 wrote:

:shock: ... Oh Jeez I didn't mean a "mental problem" imbalance :? I meant an imbalance in the relationship.Calling the shot's,ultamatum,that kind of stuff ain't good.

Oh, my bad

:roll: