The Manosphere

Tim Simmons · September 17

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

just the broken ones.

personally I don’t give a shit what I should be/shouldn’t be doing as a gender. Seems exhausting anyway.

Similar to what Nick said. Take care of yourself, be responsible, love your family and friends.

Everything else is BS.

HughFreakingDillon · September 17

PJ_Soul said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

no

Then I don't think I understand the conversations here, haha.

the conversations are about personal choices we make in life, but we don't consciously walk around thinking about how we should act "as a man". I just think how I should act as a decent human.

gimmesometruth27 · September 18

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

i don't spend a lot of time on it, but i drive a ton for my job and a lot of the time i spend with the music off and just thinking. eventually you start to reflect on your life and mistakes you have made and people you have hurt, relationships that have blown up, and you start to wonder how you can be better going forward to prevent those kinds of things. a lot of problems we have is a lot of men are not emotionally aware. we are reactive, have bad tempers, or can't hide when things are bothering us, and you can't talk about these things with other men. so we end up reading books, going to therapy, and working on things that we see as flaws within ourselves.

society says we should be one way, but not all of us fit that model.

i listen to a podcast called "men talking mindfulness" that has a lot of experts come on and talk about relationships, masculinity, reaction vs responding, emotional awareness, relationship issues, etc. i see a lot of terrible men around and i don't want to be one of them, so i am definitely mindful of that kind of thing.

Auratonal · September 19

Well... I haven't read any of the earlier replies to what I contributed here earlier just yet so... be mad at me if you like but I don't really care at the moment.

Most all expect from the replies are a bunch of putdowns from guys wanting to lay out the most, non chalant, no f**ks given, humblebrags towards men they don't respect or care to understand.

Fine and fair enough I guess but I have my own extra bit to add today.

After reading the article, I went digging around online looking for something to read about masculine archetypes. I found a link which might be of interest.

https://helpfulprofessor.com/types-of-masculinity/

From what I read over at helpfulprofessor.com, it looks like in some cases the faliure to eat right and take care of ones own health could be considered 'protest masculinity' for some guys.

As masculine opinions go men are not required to empathize with me or other men they don't feel like are deserving of some respect, but the world would be a much better place if they did have a kind of freer compassion towards their fellow men.

I know the idea of compassion and fellow men is a tough idea for some trad masc' men to get on board with because there is a portion of guys who are bothered by being expected to give out too much compassion, help or understanding because it goes against the traditional masculine veiws that a good strong man should ideally not need anyone to be ther for him weather that is socially or spiritually or not.

To take the possibility of what I said further the cap on compassion for some of these guys might indeed have quite a bit to do with how they feel about their personal values about what is or whom may gay in their social experiences vs. who is straight or heteronormative as a man and how they choose to feel about it all.

Simply put, from what I have seen men do still judge one another on that stuff.

It seems when Donald Trump was getting elected the politics of MAGA got into the head spaces and male insecurities of the manosphere BIG TIME.

Gern Blansten · September 19

My best friend is my wife. I mow the yard, maintain the pool, care for my animals, work, pay the bills, etc.

I'm a man goddammit

HughFreakingDillon · September 19

Auratonal said:

Well... I haven't read any of the earlier replies to what I contributed here earlier just yet so... be mad at me if you like but I don't really care at the moment.

Most all expect from the replies are a bunch of putdowns from guys wanting to lay out the most, non chalant, no f**ks given, humblebrags towards men they don't respect or care to understand.

Fine and fair enough I guess but I have my own extra bit to add today.

After reading the article, I went digging around online looking for something to read about masculine archetypes. I found a link which might be of interest.

https://helpfulprofessor.com/types-of-masculinity/

From what I read over at helpfulprofessor.com, it looks like in some cases the faliure to eat right and take care of ones own health could be considered 'protest masculinity' for some guys.

As masculine opinions go men are not required to empathize with me or other men they don't feel like are deserving of some respect, but the world would be a much better place if they did have a kind of freer compassion towards their fellow men.

I know the idea of compassion and fellow men is a tough idea for some trad masc' men to get on board with because there is a portion of guys who are bothered by being expected to give out too much compassion, help or understanding because it goes against the traditional masculine veiws that a good strong man should ideally not need anyone to be ther for him weather that is socially or spiritually or not.

To take the possibility of what I said further the cap on compassion for some of these guys might indeed have quite a bit to do with how they feel about their personal values about what is or whom may gay in their social experiences vs. who is straight or heteronormative as a man and how they choose to feel about it all.

Simply put, from what I have seen men do still judge one another on that stuff.

It seems when Donald Trump was getting elected the politics of MAGA got into the head spaces and male insecurities of the manosphere BIG TIME.

You got kneejerk hostile towards someone who
just explained his personal experience, nothing more.

Even if it doesn’t come off that way here, I am an incredibly sensitive hetero male who often feels most comfortable in the company of women. I’m an empath. And I didn’t take a lick of offence at nick’s comments. Now, obviously we all have different experiences, I just found your response overly hostile given the tone of his message.

josevolution · September 19

I’ll ask my wife if I’m manly enough for her!

Bentleyspop · September 19

josevolution said:

I’ll ask my wife if I’m manly enough for her!

She just told me you were.....

Go Beavers · September 19

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

i think there is a number that do, to varying degrees throughout the day. My personal experience is that religious conservative men rely on what it means to be a man in the biblical sense and their religious beliefs are closely associated to the role of being a “Christian man” ie husband, father, etc. And then following what the gender roles they interpret from the Bible.

I see another group mostly through social media, so its existence in reality may not match. These are younger single guys that have adopted what it means to be a man by internalizing internet bro content. This seems like it comes up in their pursuit of a partner and trying to form themselves into something they think is desirable. These guys also fall back on outdated gender roles.

josevolution · September 19

Bentleyspop said:

josevolution said:

I’ll ask my wife if I’m manly enough for her!

She just told me you were.....

😂😂

tempo_n_groove · September 19

https://youtu.be/76Bq3s7o-HI

HughFreakingDillon · September 19

Go Beavers said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

i think there is a number that do, to varying degrees throughout the day. My personal experience is that religious conservative men rely on what it means to be a man in the biblical sense and their religious beliefs are closely associated to the role of being a “Christian man” ie husband, father, etc. And then following what the gender roles they interpret from the Bible.

I see another group mostly through social media, so its existence in reality may not match. These are younger single guys that have adopted what it means to be a man by internalizing internet bro content. This seems like it comes up in their pursuit of a partner and trying to form themselves into something they think is desirable. These guys also fall back on outdated gender roles.

Really? I would think their behaviour is just an extension of who they are; more subconscious than choice.

Go Beavers · September 19

HughFreakingDillon said:

Go Beavers said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

i think there is a number that do, to varying degrees throughout the day. My personal experience is that religious conservative men rely on what it means to be a man in the biblical sense and their religious beliefs are closely associated to the role of being a “Christian man” ie husband, father, etc. And then following what the gender roles they interpret from the Bible.

I see another group mostly through social media, so its existence in reality may not match. These are younger single guys that have adopted what it means to be a man by internalizing internet bro content. This seems like it comes up in their pursuit of a partner and trying to form themselves into something they think is desirable. These guys also fall back on outdated gender roles.

Really? I would think their behaviour is just an extension of who they are; more subconscious than choice.

People being people, it’s hard to tell what comes first in their identity. Are they brining it in to the situation and then it gets built on, or do they come in with less of an identity, and these things feed into that blank space and fill it up with something.

mickeyrat · September 19

Go Beavers said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

Go Beavers said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

i think there is a number that do, to varying degrees throughout the day. My personal experience is that religious conservative men rely on what it means to be a man in the biblical sense and their religious beliefs are closely associated to the role of being a “Christian man” ie husband, father, etc. And then following what the gender roles they interpret from the Bible.

I see another group mostly through social media, so its existence in reality may not match. These are younger single guys that have adopted what it means to be a man by internalizing internet bro content. This seems like it comes up in their pursuit of a partner and trying to form themselves into something they think is desirable. These guys also fall back on outdated gender roles.

Really? I would think their behaviour is just an extension of who they are; more subconscious than choice.

People being people, it’s hard to tell what comes first in their identity. Are they brining it in to the situation and then it gets built on, or do they come in with less of an identity, and these things feed into that blank space and fill it up with something.

I think its the latter.

I think being bombarded with what society, media, madison avenue etc etc shove down our throats as to what masculinity/manhood are "supposed" to be leaves most in doubt and unsure of themselves at the least. It's easy to set aside who we are at our core to conform to that.

In attempting to be something we are not innately, it becomes hard to cope and move through the world when the images of what we are "supposed" to be dont quite line up with reality and lived experience. That then leads to frustration and the like settling into toxicity, imo.

Its an emotionsl stuntedness. one , we cant identify just what it is we feel but then is compounded by not knowing how to manage that. shit comes out sideways.

for me , it left me finding solace in drugs and alcohol. which worked oh so briefly then became its own impediment to living.

in getting sober and pondering the question of just who I am, reckoning with things I have done and who did I want to be going forward, I came to the same fragile sense of self I had before drugs and alcohol were my solution and built from there. landing at giving minimal fucks to others opinion of me personally as a man and looking to live MY beliefs and principles.

Still PLENTY of room for growth....

Tim Simmons · October 14

guys. this explains the manosphere so much.

https://www.consumerreports.org/lead/protein-powders-and-shakes-contain-high-levels-of-lead-a4206364640/

mickeyrat · November 10

In recent years, the notion that America’s young men are in crisis has rapidly solidified into conventional wisdom. “Seldom in recent memory has there been a cohort that’s fallen farther, faster,” the angel investor, best-selling author, and personal-finance guru Scott Galloway writes in his new book, “Notes on Being a Man.” To make his case, Galloway pulls from a heavily circulated set of statistics. At colleges and universities nationwide, female students outnumber males by about three to two. Among young adults, men are more likely than women to live with their parents; by their mid-30s, more than 15 per cent of men still live with their folks, compared to less than nine per cent of women. Men die by suicide at about three and a half times the rate that women do. Currently, the unemployment rate among young men with bachelor’s degrees between the ages of 23 and 30 is close to double that of their female peers. What is going on?

“There is no question that the generations-long erosion of the U.S. manufacturing base, and the diminution of the unionized pension jobs that this sector had offered, disproportionately harmed working-class men,” Jessica Winter writes. “Yet, if you tilt some of the most commonly cited data points this way or that, you can just as easily argue on the behalf of a woman crisis as a man crisis—or, perhaps most accurately, for an ongoing multidirectional crisis affecting us all.” Winter considers what the discourse about the challenges facing young men is missing: https://newyorkermag.visitlink.me/PKsNLo

brianlux · November 10

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

Mostly, when I think about such things (which is not often), I'm more inclined to thinking about what I should or could be doing to be a better human.

It seems to me that way too many people spend what too much time thinking and talking about gender issues and other overly self-involved issues. I mean, that's fine I guess if that what they want to think and talk about. I'm not going to judge that. Bit for me it would be like, "Fuck! I have a lot more pressing issues on my mind, like we're becoming a fascist nation! and, ... children are fucking starving... IN AMERICA!, and, not nearly enough people took global warming seriously... and it's too fucking late!"

A think a lot of people would do a lot better to get out of their own little head trips.

Lerxst1992 · November 10

brianlux said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

Mostly, when I think about such things (which is not often), I'm more inclined to thinking about what I should or could be doing to be a better human.
It seems to me that way too many people spend what too much time thinking and talking about gender issues and other overly self-involved issues. I mean, that's fine I guess if that what they want to think and talk about. I'm not going to judge that. Bit for me it would be like, "Fuck! I have a lot more pressing issues on my mind, like we're becoming a fascist nation! and, ... children are fucking starving... IN AMERICA!, and, not nearly enough people took global warming seriously... and it's too fucking late!"
A think a lot of people would do a lot better to get out of their own little head trips.

mickeyrat said:

In recent years, the notion that America’s young men are in crisis has rapidly solidified into conventional wisdom. “Seldom in recent memory has there been a cohort that’s fallen farther, faster,” the angel investor, best-selling author, and personal-finance guru Scott Galloway writes in his new book, “Notes on Being a Man.” To make his case, Galloway pulls from a heavily circulated set of statistics. At colleges and universities nationwide, female students outnumber males by about three to two. Among young adults, men are more likely than women to live with their parents; by their mid-30s, more than 15 per cent of men still live with their folks, compared to less than nine per cent of women. Men die by suicide at about three and a half times the rate that women do. Currently, the unemployment rate among young men with bachelor’s degrees between the ages of 23 and 30 is close to double that of their female peers. What is going on?

“There is no question that the generations-long erosion of the U.S. manufacturing base, and the diminution of the unionized pension jobs that this sector had offered, disproportionately harmed working-class men,” Jessica Winter writes. “Yet, if you tilt some of the most commonly cited data points this way or that, you can just as easily argue on the behalf of a woman crisis as a man crisis—or, perhaps most accurately, for an ongoing multidirectional crisis affecting us all.” Winter considers what the discourse about the challenges facing young men is missing: https://newyorkermag.visitlink.me/PKsNLo

Like corporations that put the male applications at the bottom of the pile, then we wonder why men avoid the professions and related college degrees that lead directly to these jobs?

Go Beavers · November 10

Lerxst1992 said:

brianlux said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

Mostly, when I think about such things (which is not often), I'm more inclined to thinking about what I should or could be doing to be a better human.
It seems to me that way too many people spend what too much time thinking and talking about gender issues and other overly self-involved issues. I mean, that's fine I guess if that what they want to think and talk about. I'm not going to judge that. Bit for me it would be like, "Fuck! I have a lot more pressing issues on my mind, like we're becoming a fascist nation! and, ... children are fucking starving... IN AMERICA!, and, not nearly enough people took global warming seriously... and it's too fucking late!"
A think a lot of people would do a lot better to get out of their own little head trips.

mickeyrat said:

In recent years, the notion that America’s young men are in crisis has rapidly solidified into conventional wisdom. “Seldom in recent memory has there been a cohort that’s fallen farther, faster,” the angel investor, best-selling author, and personal-finance guru Scott Galloway writes in his new book, “Notes on Being a Man.” To make his case, Galloway pulls from a heavily circulated set of statistics. At colleges and universities nationwide, female students outnumber males by about three to two. Among young adults, men are more likely than women to live with their parents; by their mid-30s, more than 15 per cent of men still live with their folks, compared to less than nine per cent of women. Men die by suicide at about three and a half times the rate that women do. Currently, the unemployment rate among young men with bachelor’s degrees between the ages of 23 and 30 is close to double that of their female peers. What is going on?

“There is no question that the generations-long erosion of the U.S. manufacturing base, and the diminution of the unionized pension jobs that this sector had offered, disproportionately harmed working-class men,” Jessica Winter writes. “Yet, if you tilt some of the most commonly cited data points this way or that, you can just as easily argue on the behalf of a woman crisis as a man crisis—or, perhaps most accurately, for an ongoing multidirectional crisis affecting us all.” Winter considers what the discourse about the challenges facing young men is missing: https://newyorkermag.visitlink.me/PKsNLo

Like corporations that put the male applications at the bottom of the pile, then we wonder why men avoid the professions and related college degrees that lead directly to these jobs?

The right has to frame this as men are victims as opposed to some of them having a lack of ability to adjust to a changing society.

Halifax2TheMax · November 10

Go Beavers said:

Lerxst1992 said:

brianlux said:

PJ_Soul said:

Honest question: Do men really go around consciously thinking about what they should be doing as men? That seems odd to me, as a woman. I don't go through life actively thinking about what I should be doing as a woman to be a woman properly, or wondering if I'm womanly enough, or anything like that at all. I stand up for the rights of women, but that's as close as I get to thinking about my own womanhood in the context I'm seeing in this thread...

Mostly, when I think about such things (which is not often), I'm more inclined to thinking about what I should or could be doing to be a better human.
It seems to me that way too many people spend what too much time thinking and talking about gender issues and other overly self-involved issues. I mean, that's fine I guess if that what they want to think and talk about. I'm not going to judge that. Bit for me it would be like, "Fuck! I have a lot more pressing issues on my mind, like we're becoming a fascist nation! and, ... children are fucking starving... IN AMERICA!, and, not nearly enough people took global warming seriously... and it's too fucking late!"
A think a lot of people would do a lot better to get out of their own little head trips.

mickeyrat said:

In recent years, the notion that America’s young men are in crisis has rapidly solidified into conventional wisdom. “Seldom in recent memory has there been a cohort that’s fallen farther, faster,” the angel investor, best-selling author, and personal-finance guru Scott Galloway writes in his new book, “Notes on Being a Man.” To make his case, Galloway pulls from a heavily circulated set of statistics. At colleges and universities nationwide, female students outnumber males by about three to two. Among young adults, men are more likely than women to live with their parents; by their mid-30s, more than 15 per cent of men still live with their folks, compared to less than nine per cent of women. Men die by suicide at about three and a half times the rate that women do. Currently, the unemployment rate among young men with bachelor’s degrees between the ages of 23 and 30 is close to double that of their female peers. What is going on?

“There is no question that the generations-long erosion of the U.S. manufacturing base, and the diminution of the unionized pension jobs that this sector had offered, disproportionately harmed working-class men,” Jessica Winter writes. “Yet, if you tilt some of the most commonly cited data points this way or that, you can just as easily argue on the behalf of a woman crisis as a man crisis—or, perhaps most accurately, for an ongoing multidirectional crisis affecting us all.” Winter considers what the discourse about the challenges facing young men is missing: https://newyorkermag.visitlink.me/PKsNLo

Like corporations that put the male applications at the bottom of the pile, then we wonder why men avoid the professions and related college degrees that lead directly to these jobs?

The right has to frame this as men are victims as opposed to some of them having a lack of ability to adjust to a changing society.

* The following opinion is mine and mine alone and does not represent the views of my family, friends, government and/or my past, present or future employer. US Department of State: 1-888-407-4747.

Or to be able to put their phones down, stop watching Andrew Taint TikToks, put the gaming controller down and notice the real, diverse, exciting and challenging world around them where the future is a long term prospect.

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