How you feeling right now???

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  • RogueStoner
    RogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    ^^^ (I'm censoring myself, I can't call him what I want to but how cruel!)
  • bluegrace
    bluegrace Posts: 2,357
    Hungry. Waiting for dinner to cook.
    Kool Kat Club 1992, Moderna museet 1992, Globen 2012, Friends arena 2014
  • njnancy
    njnancy Posts: 5,096
    I love when I come visit and read this thread - there is so much care and comfort here.

    I am struggling. Feel like I'm locked inside myself and Christmas has triggered so much anxiety and sadness. Hard to explain and I'm so sick of being fucked up. PTSD sucks. Parental Alientaion sucks - I haven't seen my son in a month. And seeing him just triggers the PTSD - sohow do I get better. And he is mentally unstable from all this and I can't help him. It's a horrible feeling to not be able to help your child, and to realize that seeing them makes you sicker. . I love Christmas and I have done nothing - no tree, decorations, presents - nothing. Going near anything Christmasy makes me want to hide. I hope none of you ever experience this. But I wanted to type how it feels, as best as I can explain, in here. I never feel safe, but this is a safish type place - I think. I doubt myself . I want me back, my family normal - but it seems so unlikely nd I'm getting scared I'll never get past this. Did watch an amazing show on HBO - The Night Of - thought I'd add something positive - so sick of posting about being fucked up. Right now I need to go to the store to pick up something and I'm terrified to go. Fuck .
  • northerndragon
    northerndragon Posts: 9,851
    njnancy said:

    I love when I come visit and read this thread - there is so much care and comfort here.

    I am struggling. Feel like I'm locked inside myself and Christmas has triggered so much anxiety and sadness. Hard to explain and I'm so sick of being fucked up. PTSD sucks. Parental Alientaion sucks - I haven't seen my son in a month. And seeing him just triggers the PTSD - sohow do I get better. And he is mentally unstable from all this and I can't help him. It's a horrible feeling to not be able to help your child, and to realize that seeing them makes you sicker. . I love Christmas and I have done nothing - no tree, decorations, presents - nothing. Going near anything Christmasy makes me want to hide. I hope none of you ever experience this. But I wanted to type how it feels, as best as I can explain, in here. I never feel safe, but this is a safish type place - I think. I doubt myself . I want me back, my family normal - but it seems so unlikely nd I'm getting scared I'll never get past this. Did watch an amazing show on HBO - The Night Of - thought I'd add something positive - so sick of posting about being fucked up. Right now I need to go to the store to pick up something and I'm terrified to go. Fuck .

    You aren't the only one who feels this way. It sounds like what I went through after my brother passed and with my concussion last year. All I can say is don't force it, don't feel bad. The joy will return as you heal just give your self the time to do that. It is the best thing you can do.
    Anything you lose from being honest
    You never really had to begin with.


    Sometimes it's not the song that makes you emotional it's the people and things that come to your mind when you hear it.
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    northerndragon said:

    njnancy said:

    I love when I come visit and read this thread - there is so much care and comfort here.

    I am struggling. Feel like I'm locked inside myself and Christmas has triggered so much anxiety and sadness. Hard to explain and I'm so sick of being fucked up. PTSD sucks. Parental Alientaion sucks - I haven't seen my son in a month. And seeing him just triggers the PTSD - sohow do I get better. And he is mentally unstable from all this and I can't help him. It's a horrible feeling to not be able to help your child, and to realize that seeing them makes you sicker. . I love Christmas and I have done nothing - no tree, decorations, presents - nothing. Going near anything Christmasy makes me want to hide. I hope none of you ever experience this. But I wanted to type how it feels, as best as I can explain, in here. I never feel safe, but this is a safish type place - I think. I doubt myself . I want me back, my family normal - but it seems so unlikely nd I'm getting scared I'll never get past this. Did watch an amazing show on HBO - The Night Of - thought I'd add something positive - so sick of posting about being fucked up. Right now I need to go to the store to pick up something and I'm terrified to go. Fuck .

    You aren't the only one who feels this way. It sounds like what I went through after my brother passed and with my concussion last year. All I can say is don't force it, don't feel bad. The joy will return as you heal just give your self the time to do that. It is the best thing you can do.
    Very safe advice!
    :hug: njnancy!
  • njnancy
    njnancy Posts: 5,096
    whispering hands said:

    northerndragon said:

    njnancy said:

    I love when I come visit and read this thread - there is so much care and comfort here.

    I am struggling. Feel like I'm locked inside myself and Christmas has triggered so much anxiety and sadness. Hard to explain and I'm so sick of being fucked up. PTSD sucks. Parental Alientaion sucks - I haven't seen my son in a month. And seeing him just triggers the PTSD - sohow do I get better. And he is mentally unstable from all this and I can't help him. It's a horrible feeling to not be able to help your child, and to realize that seeing them makes you sicker. . I love Christmas and I have done nothing - no tree, decorations, presents - nothing. Going near anything Christmasy makes me want to hide. I hope none of you ever experience this. But I wanted to type how it feels, as best as I can explain, in here. I never feel safe, but this is a safish type place - I think. I doubt myself . I want me back, my family normal - but it seems so unlikely nd I'm getting scared I'll never get past this. Did watch an amazing show on HBO - The Night Of - thought I'd add something positive - so sick of posting about being fucked up. Right now I need to go to the store to pick up something and I'm terrified to go. Fuck .

    You aren't the only one who feels this way. It sounds like what I went through after my brother passed and with my concussion last year. All I can say is don't force it, don't feel bad. The joy will return as you heal just give your self the time to do that. It is the best thing you can do.
    Very safe advice!
    :hug: njnancy!
    Thanks for the advice and cyber hugs. I know I have to go through it to get better, but sometimes it's overwhelming. It is comforting to know other's feel the same way. I am sorry about your brother - I've lost my brother(10 yrs) and my sister (3 years), and dad's gone 20 years I'm grieving a child that is still alive. Kind of takes same of the joy out of many things. Christmas is not the same. My mom is a great comfort, and I love her very much, but my circle of support has shrunk. Losing a parent is difficult - losing a sibling is hard to explain but I empathize. Shouldn't be losing siblings young. Good luck through the holidays. I look forward to the joy returning some day. Thank you for your support whispering - I haven't talked to you in a long time. Miss you!
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    Yes! I miss you also! It always brings me great joy to see you
    Post! It means you are still here with us.
  • bluegrace
    bluegrace Posts: 2,357
    Tired, but pleased. Tomorrow begins the Christmas Holiday!
    Kool Kat Club 1992, Moderna museet 1992, Globen 2012, Friends arena 2014
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    Excited and nervous, going in for my Career aptitude testing, for school.. whew.. I haven't done this in 20-something years! Nervous!
  • RogueStoner
    RogueStoner Sunny AZ Posts: 1,716
    Horribly anxious and restless.
    (Just after I tell my husband that, he plays an episode of The Twilight Zone. That intro music? Probably not the best choice at that specific moment, but it did make us laugh).
  • DesirePJ
    DesirePJ Denmark Posts: 94
    Feeling my head is going to explode
    Roskilde 1992
    Roskilde 2000
  • northerndragon
    northerndragon Posts: 9,851
    Tired and overwhelmed. So much to do and so little time.
    Anything you lose from being honest
    You never really had to begin with.


    Sometimes it's not the song that makes you emotional it's the people and things that come to your mind when you hear it.
  • 23scidoo
    23scidoo Thessaloniki,Greece Posts: 19,945
    Good..2 days off the work, before the storm..
    Athens 2006. Dusseldorf 2007. Berlin 2009. Venice 2010. Amsterdam 1 2012. Amsterdam 1+2 2014. Buenos Aires 2015.
    Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
    EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.

    I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    Refreshed.. loving this nic break in the crazy cold weather!
  • Jogill
    Jogill Posts: 4,549
    Sick! Picked up a lovely case of the flu complete with coughing, sore throat and sweats on my trip to Iceland last week. Now I wanna get out on the slopes today and not sure I can make it.
    late PJ bloomer- what was I doing in the 90's that I didn't know who Pearl Jam was???
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    Excited.
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    A little exhausted from yesterday.
  • dimitrispearljam
    dimitrispearljam Posts: 139,724
    great
    "...Dimitri...He talks to me...'.."The Ghost of Greece..".
    "..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
    “..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
  • i_lov_it
    i_lov_it Perth, Western Australia Posts: 4,007
    I'm feeling full of food...
  • whispering hands
    whispering hands Under your skin Posts: 13,527
    Excited I get to start my new part time job tomorrow! Yay!

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