My brother died Sunday from suicide; he took comfort in PJ's music in his last days. Thank you.

hankholetsgo
Posts: 125
in The Porch
Sunday night, while in a hotel room in Chicago, between the two Wrigley shows (Monday was set to be my 100th show), my phone rings. My brother was found dead Sunday afternoon. I immediately got online and booked an early Monday flight to Dallas (where I live) and then once I landed I grabbed my things and drove to Memphis (where my family is). After I arrived, I was talking to my mom and she said, "your brother told me, "this isn't gonna happen, but if I die, there's a Pearl Jam song Long Road and I want it played at my funeral."" I was floored.
The next day she asked me if I would find an additional song to play at the funeral. I chose Given to Fly. Once I settled on that, I played it for her and when it hit the chorus she started crying and told me that after my brothers last overdose (sadly, just a week prior to his death - he was on a wait list for a rehab facility), he played GTF for her and told her that while he was in the hospital he played in bed and listened to that song for three or four hours straight through. Once she read the words, she said it made total sense, "a bad time nothing could save him...."
This Saturday, we are not having a sad funeral, but a celebration of a life cut short at 28, of a kid that absent the heroin, was a goddamn good kid. A kid that loved me and that I loved. A kid that shared my love for music. Long Road and Given To Fly will be the soundtrack for that celebration.
Thank you, Pearl Jam, for creating art that he took comfort in during his last days.
The next day she asked me if I would find an additional song to play at the funeral. I chose Given to Fly. Once I settled on that, I played it for her and when it hit the chorus she started crying and told me that after my brothers last overdose (sadly, just a week prior to his death - he was on a wait list for a rehab facility), he played GTF for her and told her that while he was in the hospital he played in bed and listened to that song for three or four hours straight through. Once she read the words, she said it made total sense, "a bad time nothing could save him...."
This Saturday, we are not having a sad funeral, but a celebration of a life cut short at 28, of a kid that absent the heroin, was a goddamn good kid. A kid that loved me and that I loved. A kid that shared my love for music. Long Road and Given To Fly will be the soundtrack for that celebration.
Thank you, Pearl Jam, for creating art that he took comfort in during his last days.
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Comments
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Those are two beautiful songs to honor your brother. Given To Fly is a song I love and it has helped me though some sad times. It sounds like your Mom is an aware and understanding lady. I wish you both health and healing. Take care of each other.0
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Thanks for sharing this..be strong you and your mother..Athens 2006. Dusseldorf 2007. Berlin 2009. Venice 2010. Amsterdam 1 2012. Amsterdam 1+2 2014. Buenos Aires 2015.
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I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..0 -
Thinking of you & your family...
Words aren't enough, but feel free to reach out to me if you need an ear. Stay strong.
MattI LOVE MUSIC.
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www.cluthe.com0 -
Sorry for your loss.
MichaelTake me piece by piece.....
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....0 -
I am a parent mate and my son who is 26 has come through a drug issue he has battled for fourteen months
As a dad PJ's music was honestly an artery to me through the heartache ,stress ,pain and love
It is devastating having a loved one fall victim to a dependacy
I hope you get some peace of heart through PJ's music and through song supply a connection with your brother
Good luck moving forward to you and your family
Both LONG ROAD and GIVEN are beautiful powerful songs
Thanks for sharing a very personal story,I think that's brave
Take care0 -
this is so sad to read. sorry man, there are no words really other than that.:(0
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Awful. Very sorry0
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I am so very sorry for your loss.2014: Cincinnati
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 10 -
Oh man..so sorry for your loss."Going where the water tastes like wine!"0
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Prayers to you and your family. Heart breaking.0
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Thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Suicide is a tough thing for any of us to understand. One of my young staff (32 y/o) killed himself about a month ago. I knew him for about 4 years and am still struggling about what I must have missed. Wishing you peace throughout these next few days.I'm through with screaming0
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Very sorry for your loss9/1/00, 4/28/03, 7/5/03, 7/6/03, 7/12/03, 10/1/04, 9/28/05, 5/27/06, 5/28/06, 6/1/06, 6/27/08, 6/30/08, 8/7/08 (EV), 6/12/09 (EV), 10/27/09, 10/28/09,10/30/09, 10/31/09, 5/21/10, 6/15/11 (EV), 9/2/12, 7/19/13, 10/21/13, 10/22/13, 10/27/13, 4/28/16, 4/29/16, 8/7/16, 11/4/16 (TOTD), 8/18/18, 8/20/18, 9/24/21 (EV&Earthlings), 9/26/21, 9/11/2022, 9/14/2022, 9/7/2024, 9/9/2024, 9/12/2024, 5/16/2025, 5/18/20250
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sorry for your loss- Chicago Gchicago98-chicago00-chicago03-east troy03-chicago06-chicago09-east troy11_2-chicago13-moline14-milwaukee14-lexington16-chicago16_1-chicago16_2-chicago18_1-chicago18_20
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So sorry. Peace to your brother and to you and your family.5/3/92 Omaha, NE
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Sorry to hear this. Thoughts go out to you and your family."I'm a lucky man, to count on both hands the [shows I've done]. Some folks just have one, others they got none..."
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"He made the deal with the devil, we get to play with him.
He goes to hell, of course. We're going to heaven."0 -
I'm sorry for your family's loss :(0
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Heartbreaking. I am so sorry for your loss.ELITIST FUK0
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God bless you and your family. Im very sorry for your loss.1998-06-30 Minneapolis
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Awful stuff.... So sorry for your loss.0
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AmenLondon Ontario 2013, Buffalo New York 2013, Lincoln Nebraska 2014, Quebec City 20160
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