Stanford rapist

PJPOWER · June 2016

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

PJPOWER said:

rgambs said:

PJ_Soul said:
I was talking about a lot more than a "don't rape" talk. Men really need to dig deep on this one.
I thing dig deep is right, it comes down to a deep, fundamental worldview...
Frankly, I think it is much like saying people need to be educated or they will vote for Trump, or that people need economic security or they will commit crime, etc... These are big problems that society is continually failing (for generations) to correct, and it is a much more long term and difficult prospect than the immediate and easy solution of teaching young women how not to be victims. It is similar, I think, to people saying we need to fix socioeconomic issues to stop gun violence in the US... Sure, that's true, but it is a monumental (possibly impossible) task and the faster, more attainable goal is to just tighter the availability of guns.
Everyone needs to realize and understand that there are bad people in the world and always will be. I spent most of my career in the social services and can tell you right now that most people have no concept of how much really bad shit goes on all around them all of the time. People need to know and be aware of their surroundings. Do not put yourself in situations that make it easy for people to take advantage of you because in every crowd there is probably someone that would jump at the opportunity. I do not want to come across as blaming the victim, but there are so many ways this situation could have been avoided. Maybe in a perfect world it would be fine to pass out drunk next to a dumpster, but in the real world that type of behavior will only lead to negative consequences because sickos like this are everywhere! It was not mere coincidence that one just happened to be there...they are all around.
The analogy of guns is what I disagree with though. On one side you say that the easy solution is teaching women not to be victims. How about teaching our youth not to be violent? Lack of morals and ethics is what leads to this behavior, not availability or alcohol or guns. We need more people leading by example and watching out for each other. I praise the ones that stopped this asshole in the act instead of walking by like some would do. I actually kinda wish they had been armed though...preventing a rape is a justified use of deadly force in most states. Would have saved the taxpayers some money...and this conversation would be null.
Hmmm.

As many stupid arguments as the pro gun crowd makes for carrying weapons... here's one of the first semi-intelligent ones: have a gun so you can shoot a rapist's pecker off when you stumble upon them raping someone.

Okay. I'm listening. Go on.

Lol, I knew there was common ground buried in there somewhere

HughFreakingDillon · June 2016

rapists are bred, not born. claiming anything to the contrary, in my opinion, is ludicrous. respecting women is the responsibility of your parents, not your genes.

OnWis97 · June 2016

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

PJ_Soul said:
I was talking about a lot more than a "don't rape" talk. Men really need to dig deep on this one.
So this is about men bashing? Fathers, in general, are failing to raise their sons correctly and are solely at the root of this problem where they need to dig deep?

Interesting.

Generalizations are viciously attacked on this forum, but you feel really comfortable making one in this context.

I wouldn't necessarily disagree with you in many cases (the same ones I suggest we safeguard our women from), but are you saying mothers get a pass on this one? I grew up respecting my mother and as such, I respect women. My dad never taught me to respect my mother- my mother got it through her actions.

The fast swimmer's mother never wrote a letter revealing her idiocy, but I'm assuming she's a full fledged idiot and she's just as culpable as the father for raising their rib eye eating pride and joy- unless... it can be established that the father spoke to the joys of violating women and encouraged and nurtured the dark side of their mutant offspring.

Come on. It's nuanced enough to warrant better than a knee-jerk reaction.

Not that mothers aren't important, but there's something to be said for the male parent telling his son to be respectful, particularly given that he's hearing all sorts of things from his young male friends. As, I'd like to think, an above-average male in the area of respecting women, I know that when I was a teenager, I'd be more likely to roll my eyes at such dialog from my mom than my dad. Remember, young people, regardless of how smart and generally respectful they are are still stupid.

I was in about 8th grade during the Mike Tyson rape aftermath, surrounded by nitwit friends saying "well what did think she was going into his room to do, play checkers?" It was my father that set me straight when I parroted it...would it have resonated as much from my mother? Who knows. But there's value to a male role model in this situation.

Is the mother a part of this punk's problem? Of course. My take has always been that the "parents" have a role here. But as nice as it is to say "boys should respect their mothers" that's not necessarily the case. It's also males (be it fathers, peers, etc.) that traditionally have carried out the culture of victim-blaming and rationalizing how "she actually does want it." So I'd feel comfortable arguing it's males that need to step up their games. Yeah, I've heard women say "Well what was she doing out there by herself at 2:00 AM" too, and that's part of the problem...all people need to help change the culture, but to look to fathers as the people that need to lead is not "male bashing."

Regarding "don't rape." That's shorthand for something very important. Sure, if you literally tell a kid not to rape and don't expand on it, the response of "duh" is probably warranted. But all young boys need to be reminded that certain things are not open doors to do whatever they want. Because it's not necessarily what they are hearing.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

PJ_Soul said:
No Thirty. It's not about bashing men. It's about calling men out for not taking any responsibility for what is a male problem. For some reason women bear the burden of rape, of dealing with it, of trying to publicize the problem, and trying to being awareness, while it is men who need to pull their shit together and do something meaningful about the problem. All men. Otherwise widespread rape and sexual assaults on women will continue just the same as it is now. Men - good men - need to take responsibility for this safety crisis, as they are the only ones who can stop it. A male movement is required. Some leaders need to step up.to the cause.

You mean kind of like Muslims and ISIS for the Islamic problem? Place responsibility for the Islamic violence problem on the peaceful practitioners?

You do realize the overwhelming majority of men wouldn't hurt a woman don't you (outside of backwards countries that keep their women in boxes)?

To save any misunderstanding... you, and others, rightfully argued against the notion I compared your 'men problem' to. Yet in this particular matter, you seem to feel a broad generalization is warranted and legitimate. I find that interesting.

PJ_Soul · June 2016

You are just not understanding what I am saying at all.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

PJ_Soul said:
You are just not understanding what I am saying at all.

I am. I'm understanding.

HughFreakingDillon · June 2016

Jeff Martin of the Tea Party is a big supporter of the White Ribbon campaign, which is an organization of men that stand up against domestic violence against women. This the kind of thing PJ_Soul is referring to, I believe.

The thing is, the message gets taken more seriously, rightly or wrongly, when it is the group that is the most likely to be the perpetrators that are standing up against the crime.

I agree with PJ_Soul that it should be the father's responsibility, to a larger extent, to teach the sons how to treat women properly. the message might get lost easier or dismissed entirely when it comes from someone who may have a less objective view on the subjet matter.

PJPOWER · June 2016

Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.

HughFreakingDillon · June 2016

PJPOWER said:
Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.

I disagree. you don't have to be psychotic or a sociopath to be a rapist. some people are just brought up to not respect others/boundaries, whether it's other men, other women, children, property, whatever.

PJPOWER · June 2016

HughFreakingDillon said:

PJPOWER said:
Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.
I disagree. you don't have to be psychotic or a sociopath to be a rapist. some people are just brought up to not respect others/boundaries, whether it's other men, other women, children, property, whatever.

I'll agree with you. But my point still stands. We are surrounded by people that are raised the wrong way, sociopaths, dogs, etc. There is no way of extinguishing all of those different kinds of threats...Unless maybe you live in candyland it's probably not a good idea to pass out drunk next to a dumpster. Being oblivious to the environment is never a good idea. If you pass out drunk in the woods, you probably raise your odds of being eaten by a bear. Still a victim, but again...play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

The father has a huge role in his son's character development. So does the mother. So does his peer influences. So does every other aspect of society.

It's irrelevant. We are going to fail with some individuals. Some men are going to become violent and murder someone or rape someone or beat someone senseless... for kicks.

Coming back to my original point which others have expressed as well: in light of our impending failures... I choose to safeguard my daughter from being left vulnerable to a mutant. If she was ever raped... I would not say, "What the f**k were you doing?" I would attribute 100% of the blame on the rapist... and... then I'd go kill him or at least bash his face in.

My comments are intended to support women... not blame them. The comments are rooted in reality and pragmatic in nature. I'd love for a peaceful society where men would respect women- and other men for that matter- and leave each to their own. But I'd be dreaming with my head up my ass if I felt that time was coming anytime soon.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

HughFreakingDillon said:

PJPOWER said:
Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.
I disagree. you don't have to be psychotic or a sociopath to be a rapist. some people are just brought up to not respect others/boundaries, whether it's other men, other women, children, property, whatever.

I'd respectfully disagree here.

I think that in order to rape someone, there is something wrong with you. Rape is not a lapse in judgement or knowledge... it's a cold, callous act that requires a lack of empathy and a sinister dark side.

hedonist · June 2016

The piece of shit dragged her to the dumpster.

Not only speaks of a lack of humaneness but also of anger and power. The fact that he "used" an object (and what, he dug into or around the dumpster improv-style for something adequate or was he prepared?) vs himself...ah Freud, bet you'd have much to say about that.

True, some of those traits can be innate but are generally learned whether by experience (the abused goes on to abuse) or by example.

No matter, no excuse.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

Spoiled rotten little shit never learned responsibility. He learned narcissism. They think six months is too much? Shows you what their mentality is: their shit doesn't stink and the victim holds little to no value compared to 'precious'.

As narcissistic failures themselves... the parents failed the fast swimmer and so have the courts who, tragically, have placed extra value on this worm's life. If this was an impoverished young black male... I don't think the sentence would have looked the same.

F**king pisses me off.

Enkidu · June 2016

I was working at a job and not long after Kobe Bryant was accused of rape, one of the bosses showed up wearing a "Free Kobe" t-shirt. I suppose the good news - everyone who worked there (male and female) was appalled. But because he was the boss, no one said anything. (He's a parent. Ugh.)

HughFreakingDillon · June 2016

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

PJPOWER said:
Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.
I disagree. you don't have to be psychotic or a sociopath to be a rapist. some people are just brought up to not respect others/boundaries, whether it's other men, other women, children, property, whatever.
I'd respectfully disagree here.

I think that in order to rape someone, there is something wrong with you. Rape is not a lapse in judgement or knowledge... it's a cold, callous act that requires a lack of empathy and a sinister dark side.

well, without making it into a cartoonish villain like in your last adjective, I'd say I agree that there is something wrong with the person. but the person was brought up that way. or something happened to them for them to become that way. I don't believe it is a mental illness of any kind. it's not even sexual to the predator. it's violence, it's power. some shitheads go around beating up people, some shitheads beat their wives, some shitheads beat their kids. other shitheads rape/sexually abuse women.

HughFreakingDillon · June 2016

hedonist said:
The piece of shit dragged her to the dumpster.

Not only speaks of a lack of humaneness but also of anger and power. The fact that he "used" an object (and what, he dug into or around the dumpster improv-style for something adequate or was he prepared?) vs himself...ah Freud, bet you'd have much to say about that.

True, some of those traits can be innate but are generally learned whether by experience (the abused goes on to abuse) or by example.

No matter, no excuse.

did he? I wasn't sure how it happened. did she pass out there? did he drag her there? I didn't read how they ended up there. man, this story just keeps getting worse. in the back of my mind, I'm always trying to think of the good in people, and maybe, maybe they were getting it on consensually and then she passed out or something of that nature. but after everything I've read, and the account of the Swedes, this guy really is a piece of excrement.

F Me In The Brain · June 2016

Enkidu said:
I was working at a job and not long after Kobe Bryant was accused of rape, one of the bosses showed up wearing a "Free Kobe" t-shirt. I suppose the good news - everyone who worked there (male and female) was appalled. But because he was the boss, no one said anything. (He's a parent. Ugh.)

But he was good at basketball. What don't you understand?

Agree, it is totally disgusting.

g under p · June 2016

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:
Spoiled rotten little shit never learned responsibility. He learned narcissism. They think six months is too much? Shows you what their mentality is: their shit doesn't stink and the victim holds little to no value compared to 'precious'.

As narcissistic failures themselves... the parents failed the fast swimmer and so have the courts who, tragically, have placed extra value on this worm's life. If this was an impoverished young black male... I don't think the sentence would have looked the same.

F**king pisses me off.

I totally agree.

Peace

Thirty Bills Unpaid · June 2016

HughFreakingDillon said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

PJPOWER said:
Are we avoiding the "psychotic" realm of the conversation? A person that does something like this is probably a sociopath. It requires lack of empathy, disregard of the wellbeing of others, etc to be able to follow through with this type of behavior...textbook. I do not think this is a gender problem, but this dude probably does not fit the definition of a well functioning person. Just because a person is born a male does not automatically give them rape tendencies. Again, I feel that people need to be more aware that there are people like this out there.
I saw a humorous video the other day of a person getting his leg humped by a dog while he was passed out drunk on a sidewalk... The likelihood of getting humped by either a dog or a psychopath increases dramatically if you pass out drunk in a place you probably should not pass out drunk. Dogs and sickos are everywhere... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Not saying it's acceptable, but it is reality.
I disagree. you don't have to be psychotic or a sociopath to be a rapist. some people are just brought up to not respect others/boundaries, whether it's other men, other women, children, property, whatever.
I'd respectfully disagree here.

I think that in order to rape someone, there is something wrong with you. Rape is not a lapse in judgement or knowledge... it's a cold, callous act that requires a lack of empathy and a sinister dark side.
well, without making it into a cartoonish villain like in your last adjective, I'd say I agree that there is something wrong with the person. but the person was brought up that way. or something happened to them for them to become that way. I don't believe it is a mental illness of any kind. it's not even sexual to the predator. it's violence, it's power. some shitheads go around beating up people, some shitheads beat their wives, some shitheads beat their kids. other shitheads rape/sexually abuse women.

Not saying mentally ill. Just saying f**ked in the head- just like the others you have described here: criminals.

Regardless of how they came to be... once they cross the line... f**k 'em.

Stanford rapist

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