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Advice on how to resolve a trade gone bad?
Me and my girlfriend are both huge fans of pearl jam and post here often, both of us have been members of 10c for years. Infact, we met here.
Alot of people on the forums know both of us, as we have met many people at the many shows we've both attended, as well as made friends with people through the forums. We both have done numerous trades with people on the forums, as well as helped fans out with free CDs, DVDs, posters and more. We have both also contributed (and in many cases, organized) raising funds for members in need. We have always been contributing members of the PJ community.
So in September 2012, my gf made a post on Facebook asking anyone who was at midtown in Atlanta if they could grab us an extra poster as we happen to collect Pearl Jam posters as well as art with trees in it, so the poster was right up our alley.
We were contacted by another forum member through Facebook who was at the festival and was told that they would pick us up a poster at the festival. This is someone we'd met before and my gf considered a friend.
After the weekend, the forum member contacted us and said a T shirt would be fine for trade to cover the poster cost. I was going to the Missoula show at the end of September and I would grab a shirt for them.
I went to Missoula, waited in a god awful long line, over an hour, and bought the shirt. I then mailed out the shirt the following week along with a couple of DVDs as an extra thank you and to cover the difference between the poster cost and shirt cost. This was the first week of October, 4 full months ago.
The member contacted us, and said sorry for not sending the poster yet but due to a medical condition, which in the past required surgery, hasn't been able to make it to the post office yet.
We replied and said not to worry at all! I personally having dealt with a loved one having cancer and understanding how complicated it can be.
So week after week passed. During these months we checked in a few times and asked how they were doing. Each time we were told they were doing better, had gone back to work, even attended some (non PJ) shows. So we inquired about shipping. On different occasions we heard things like "I'm such a slacker when it comes to getting to the post office" and other things. Kept promising to try to make it there in a few days.
Then we see posts on the forum talking about how they need to get to the post office and ship a bunch of items, but ours never arrived.
In December we emailed again and asked about shipping. They said it was shipped that same day we emailed. several days later we email again, asking for tracking information, the reply was the number was at work and that they will send it the next day. After 3 more days we emailed again and the only reply was "it was delivered Saturday" and that's it. We were once offered to give us their poster but we told them no, we wanted ours that we traded for. We didn't want to have to be made to feel like we were taking something from the member- and who knows if it would ever show up anyways. We again asked for tracking so we could check with our local post office but never received a response.
We never got the poster. I dont believe the item was ever shipped. How can they know it was delivered if we never saw the tracking number? They never provided one. We get packages here nearly daily. Never once have we had an item not show up that was actually shipped.
We have been patient, never freaking out, never being rude etc. But it's feb 4th and the shows were in September.
How should we go forward? We've made a point to not say who it is, but I'm sure once they see it they will know its them. At this point I would rather have my $35 back for the shirt I bought and then spent another $6 to ship.
Any advice would be great. We've done alot of trades, never once had any complaints, nothing but people thanking us for the things we do. I don't want to start a fight but this is beyond ridiculous.
Btw- This weekend we received the poster from a very good friend on the board who knows our situation. A HUGE thank you to Mike (DURP) who along with his gf sent us this gift. They are amazing people with big hearts.
Thanks for reading and I would like to know how others would proceed at this time.
Alot of people on the forums know both of us, as we have met many people at the many shows we've both attended, as well as made friends with people through the forums. We both have done numerous trades with people on the forums, as well as helped fans out with free CDs, DVDs, posters and more. We have both also contributed (and in many cases, organized) raising funds for members in need. We have always been contributing members of the PJ community.
So in September 2012, my gf made a post on Facebook asking anyone who was at midtown in Atlanta if they could grab us an extra poster as we happen to collect Pearl Jam posters as well as art with trees in it, so the poster was right up our alley.
We were contacted by another forum member through Facebook who was at the festival and was told that they would pick us up a poster at the festival. This is someone we'd met before and my gf considered a friend.
After the weekend, the forum member contacted us and said a T shirt would be fine for trade to cover the poster cost. I was going to the Missoula show at the end of September and I would grab a shirt for them.
I went to Missoula, waited in a god awful long line, over an hour, and bought the shirt. I then mailed out the shirt the following week along with a couple of DVDs as an extra thank you and to cover the difference between the poster cost and shirt cost. This was the first week of October, 4 full months ago.
The member contacted us, and said sorry for not sending the poster yet but due to a medical condition, which in the past required surgery, hasn't been able to make it to the post office yet.
We replied and said not to worry at all! I personally having dealt with a loved one having cancer and understanding how complicated it can be.
So week after week passed. During these months we checked in a few times and asked how they were doing. Each time we were told they were doing better, had gone back to work, even attended some (non PJ) shows. So we inquired about shipping. On different occasions we heard things like "I'm such a slacker when it comes to getting to the post office" and other things. Kept promising to try to make it there in a few days.
Then we see posts on the forum talking about how they need to get to the post office and ship a bunch of items, but ours never arrived.
In December we emailed again and asked about shipping. They said it was shipped that same day we emailed. several days later we email again, asking for tracking information, the reply was the number was at work and that they will send it the next day. After 3 more days we emailed again and the only reply was "it was delivered Saturday" and that's it. We were once offered to give us their poster but we told them no, we wanted ours that we traded for. We didn't want to have to be made to feel like we were taking something from the member- and who knows if it would ever show up anyways. We again asked for tracking so we could check with our local post office but never received a response.
We never got the poster. I dont believe the item was ever shipped. How can they know it was delivered if we never saw the tracking number? They never provided one. We get packages here nearly daily. Never once have we had an item not show up that was actually shipped.
We have been patient, never freaking out, never being rude etc. But it's feb 4th and the shows were in September.
How should we go forward? We've made a point to not say who it is, but I'm sure once they see it they will know its them. At this point I would rather have my $35 back for the shirt I bought and then spent another $6 to ship.
Any advice would be great. We've done alot of trades, never once had any complaints, nothing but people thanking us for the things we do. I don't want to start a fight but this is beyond ridiculous.
Btw- This weekend we received the poster from a very good friend on the board who knows our situation. A HUGE thank you to Mike (DURP) who along with his gf sent us this gift. They are amazing people with big hearts.
Thanks for reading and I would like to know how others would proceed at this time.
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Our pleasure.
Maybe you are not their first victims.
+1
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St. Paul 2014 • Mexico City 2015 • Philadelphia II 2016 • Ottawa 2016 • Amsterdam I & II 2018 • Wrigley Field II 2018 • Phoenix 2022
Apollo Theater 2022 • Chicago I 2023 • Baltimore 2024 • Pittsburgh I & II 2025
To clarify, I'm the girlfriend in the situation.
Calling the person out is tempting--but this is someone I considered a friend and would rather have it resolved without doing that. however, I'm not against it. This person is somewhat well liked and known around here, so if we do that, it's going to get ugly and sticky fast. And I really don't wanna play the "our friends" versus "thier friends" game.
I'm hoping they will see this thread and handle business with us privately. If that doesn't happen, names may come up.
Btw, this is someone on the trusted traders list on Lost Dogs. So, can't always trust that list apparently. It's one thing to get bent over by someone you don't really know on here but it sucks much more to get screwed over by someone you considered somewhat of a friend.
2011: East Troy, WI 1 & 2; Toronto ON 1 & 2; Hamilton ON
2012: Berlin, Germany 1& 2; Stockholm Sweden; Oslo Norway; Copenhagen Denmark
2013: Wrigley Field- Chicago, IL; Philadelphia, PA 1 & 2; Hartford, CT; Vancouver BC; Seattle, WA.
2014: Cincinnati, OH; St. Louis, MO; Moline, IL; Milwaukee, WI
2016: Wrigley Field- Chicago 1&2
03 - Tampa
08 - Tampa
12 - DeLuna Fest, EV Orlando 1 & 2, EV Ft Lauderdale 1 & 2
13 - Wrigley!!! ,Brooklyn 1 & 2, Hartford, OKC, Seattle
14 - Leeds, Milton Keynes, St Louis
16 - Ft Lauderdale, Miami, Tampa, Jacksonville, Wrigley 1 & 2
All that I once held as true
I stand alone without beliefs
The only truth I know is you.
it helped with sawyer and that fiveagaist one guy..and maybe a couple of others
It's up to you to call this person out. Looks like you have done the right thing for a long time.
The right thing in this case is to chalk it up as a loss, but warn others not to trade with this person.
The fact that they remain on the "Good to trade" list is a shame.
...
People do shit for strange reasons, just a fact of life. I know how you feel, I have been on the end of a trade 11 months later still waiting, took them at their word, it was in the mail, then it was in the mail again, and again for sure, then was offered to collect some EV solo merch to be nice to me and stupid me paypaled quite a few $$ and have never seen that either and that was three months ago, I have given up, I cant even bring myself to PM or email this person anymore. at least I know i would never do that to anyone, no consolation knowing that they have my 98 Ames poster hanging somewhere, and I think people would be shocked if I called out this person.
A++++ trader list is a crock of shit in my opinion
Maybe I am just too trusting or naive that people will do the right thing. Well I was not anymore.
I wish you luck
If the person who has you poster reads this thread, DO THE RIGHT THING send the poster
Pearl Jam is in the same for me.
I had my posters shipped to my Ex's house accidentally . When I found out, he only had 2 choices, MAIL them, or I'm buying a plane ticket. He's girlfriend shipped them express the next day. I recommend looking at the fair trader thread on lost dogs. We are listed for reasons.
I hope this never happens to anyone.
On my death bed, I will scrawl the address and point to the package. Dying wishes?
Ive been informed by another member via PM that he has also had issues with the same person- both involved the person not mailing something when they were supposed to. Unfortunately that person will likely be out for more than we are.
No surprise there!
So, if you reading this- this is your chance to make it right before I post who you are.
2011: East Troy, WI 1 & 2; Toronto ON 1 & 2; Hamilton ON
2012: Berlin, Germany 1& 2; Stockholm Sweden; Oslo Norway; Copenhagen Denmark
2013: Wrigley Field- Chicago, IL; Philadelphia, PA 1 & 2; Hartford, CT; Vancouver BC; Seattle, WA.
2014: Cincinnati, OH; St. Louis, MO; Moline, IL; Milwaukee, WI
2016: Wrigley Field- Chicago 1&2
I'd do this
Who is wrong and who’s right
Fargo 2003
Winnipeg 2005
Winnipeg 2011
St. Paul 2014
absolutely agree. it was a good idea in theory, but 600 people? all it takes is one good trade to get on the trusted list? it would be an enormous task to keep track, but to be worth anything a feedback rating needs to be done. otherwise it's useless. even a shoddy dealer has had at least one bad transaction. that's how they sucker people!
Fargo 2003
Winnipeg 2005
Winnipeg 2011
St. Paul 2014
Hope things all work out and this person sees the thread and mans /womans up but if not, you guys are still awesome
And very cool of DURP :thumbup: :thumbup:
I could not agree more :thumbup:
SuMay you are my voice of reason
It's disappointing to say the least. And it is more about the principle than the money, absolutely. I've blown worse than $35 on things...but when they are on the good traders list and others have experienced bad deals with this person--I feel it might be time for them to face the heat.
I'm usually pretty non-confrontational, you know me, but if I don't say something to make this stop, will anyone?
I'm going to wait an ample amount of time before outing them, but I will definitely consider your words before acting
Thanks girl!!
And you are right---DURP is an amazing dude
2011: East Troy, WI 1 & 2; Toronto ON 1 & 2; Hamilton ON
2012: Berlin, Germany 1& 2; Stockholm Sweden; Oslo Norway; Copenhagen Denmark
2013: Wrigley Field- Chicago, IL; Philadelphia, PA 1 & 2; Hartford, CT; Vancouver BC; Seattle, WA.
2014: Cincinnati, OH; St. Louis, MO; Moline, IL; Milwaukee, WI
2016: Wrigley Field- Chicago 1&2
Good luck with the decision, I know it's not going to be easy but I know it will be well thought out
PS I'm getting flashbacks of you yelling at me to go to bed when we were all giddy with excitement about the Europe tour! I'm going to bed now!
Adelaide 1998
Adelaide 2003
Adelaide 2006 night 1
Adelaide 2006 night 2
Adelaide 2009
Melbourne 2009
Christchurch NZ 2009
Eddie Vedder, Adelaide 2011
PJ20 USA 2011 night 1
PJ20 USA 2011 night 2
Adelaide BIG DAY OUT 2014
Dublin 02 Arena - 22/6/10. Belfast Odyssey Arena - 23/6/10. London Hyde Park - 25/6/10. Berlin Wuhlheide - 30/6/10.
Manchester MEN - 20/06/12. Manchester MEN - 21/06/12
you both are amazing human beigns,i dont need any traders list to tell me that..
the good idea is at the posts above...to buy one from the shop..
i respect you even more,that you know to keep privacy...
the person did that,well...its a shame...
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”