Tender moment with my ill dad

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  • JOEJOEJOE
    JOEJOEJOE Posts: 10,853
    I thank everyone for reading my sappy thoughts and for the kind wishes!
  • Claireack
    Claireack Posts: 13,561
    Joe - that was really beautiful, touch can be such a powerful way of communicating.

    My thoughts are with you all x
    <a href="http://s952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/?action=view&current=domo.jpg&quot; target="_blank"><img src="http://i952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/domo.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
  • JOEJOEJOE
    JOEJOEJOE Posts: 10,853
    mfc2006 wrote:
    so glad you had that time with him....time is everything.

    (just re-read this before i hit submit...and i'm sorry if this a sob story...but if feels so good to talk/wrote about right now....thanks)

    it makes me think about the last visit i had with my dad while he was fighting ALS. dad & i weren't very close while i was growing up...i wasn't a bad kid, but i sure pushed his buttons. as we got older, we grew a little closer. on the morning of the last day i saw him...he was feeling weak. my brother was going to drive me to the airport to fly back to Kansas City (where i was living) from Houston. i sat down next to him on the couch...he could barely speak, but he said "Matt...don't think i'll be going to the airport today." i told him not to worry about it...to gather his strength & rest and that i understood. dad was on a breathing machine & a feeding tube...but he looked good..i could tell that he was in good spirits. i started telling random stories about growing up...some very funny ones & he started laughing like crazy. i was holding his hand the whole time...and he was squeezing it...which he couldn't really do anymore b/c of ALS....it was one of the best hours of my life. he took out the breathing machine tube so he could really laugh...it was great. all of a sudden, he had enough strength to go the airport...so i was able to spend another 45 minutes with him.

    he passed away 3 1/2 months later...and i was supposed to see him prior to that...but i couldn't make it down b/c of work. at the time, i was angry that i missed that last visit....but now i know that our last visit was better than i could have ever imagined.

    thoughts & prayers are with you & your family, Joe. enjoy those moments & know that he'll always be right by your side. it's tough...i know....but i can honestly feel my dad's presence as i type this.

    thoughts & prayers,
    Matt

    Very touching story...thanks!
  • Sprunkn7
    Sprunkn7 Posts: 5,286
    I do agree, touch is a powerful thing. I think your trying to embrace what the situation is. It's not like there's a choice in what is happening. These are the memories that will be the strongest in your mind for a while and regret would be shame.

    Also a quick thanks for your support at my loss. It was a comfort that people I didn't even know would be so kind.

    Sending hugs and prayers to you and your family Joe.
    Thank you fellow 10 clubber for saving my ass....again!!!
  • rollings
    rollings unknown Posts: 7,127
    JOEJOEJOE wrote:
    When I got to his home today, straight away, I sat next to him and took his hand and held it for a half-hour. It seemed so natural, and I hope it conveyed my love for him that may have gone unspoken in the past.

    "Do You Realize" by The Flaming Lips

    Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face
    Do You Realize - we're floating in space -
    Do You Realize - that happiness makes you cry
    Do You Realize - that everyone you know someday will die

    And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know
    You realize that life goes fast
    It's hard to make the good things last
    You realize the sun doesn't go down
    It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

    How moving is your story.

    This Flaming Lips song...these words....have come to mean so much to me....

    Do you realize...we're floating in space...
    do you realize....that everyone you know someday will die

    talk about a hefty dose of ultimate perspective--

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fk76rsV71S0
  • pearljgirl2010
    pearljgirl2010 Shillington, PA/Tuckerton, NJ Posts: 3,428
    JOEJOEJOE wrote:
    Being that his time is limited, I am trying to do as much as possible to lessen any regrets that him and I may have regarding our relationship.

    When I got to his home today, straight away, I sat next to him and took his hand and held it for a half-hour. It seemed so natural, and I hope it conveyed my love for him that may have gone unspoken in the past.

    that's beautiful....and I believe that little gestures like that absolutely lessen any regrets that either of you have. It's so important to live for today and not in the past...you did a lovely thing, which was healing for both of you in many ways :-)
    Need a tour Travel Agent??? Pick me :-)

    Whatever you are, be a good one --Lincoln
  • JOEJOEJOE
    JOEJOEJOE Posts: 10,853
    pearljgirl2010 wrote:
    JOEJOEJOE wrote:
    Being that his time is limited, I am trying to do as much as possible to lessen any regrets that him and I may have regarding our relationship.

    When I got to his home today, straight away, I sat next to him and took his hand and held it for a half-hour. It seemed so natural, and I hope it conveyed my love for him that may have gone unspoken in the past.

    that's beautiful....and I believe that little gestures like that absolutely lessen any regrets that either of you have. It's so important to live for today and not in the past...you did a lovely thing, which was healing for both of you in many ways :-)

    Thanks!

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