Scotland

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  • Why so serious?
    Why so serious? Posts: 48
    I hear the ladies don't shave :( this is gona be the worst vacation ever.
  • Rygar
    Rygar Posts: 8,711
    Why so serious? wrote:
    I hear the ladies don't shave :( this is gona be the worst vacation ever.
    There is also a shortage of utensils.
  • Jeremy1012
    Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    Byrnzie wrote:
    I dinae take jokes aboot the Scottish being better drinkers than the English lightly. ;)
    I thought the infamous stiff upper lip should help you handle the truth a wee bit better?
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • eyedclaar
    eyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    If a random stranger punches you in the face for no reason, don't be upset, it is a sign of affection.
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  • duggro
    duggro Posts: 1,343
    oh dear


    oh dear oh dear oh dear
    Dublin Leeds Berlin Wembley
  • sennin
    sennin Posts: 2,146
    There's a US TV show called Three Sheets. They visited a bar in Edinburgh, he bought a bottle of Scotch and it's stored in the bars locker. If you tell the barkeep that you saw the episode you get a free dram....it might help you find some internet access. ;)

    I'm trying to find out the bar's name. :p

    Whiski Bar?

    Make sure you tell tem that Zane sent you!
  • kh65
    kh65 Posts: 946
    If it isn't Scottish, it's CRAP!!!

    (SNL reference, sorry.)
    "If you're not living on the edge you're taking up too much room."

    Gambling=a taxation on stupidity.

    Remember, you can walk anywhere, as long as you have the time.

    http://www.ryanmontbleauband.com/

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  • Wobbie
    Wobbie Posts: 31,225
    The food wasn't great :p but I absolutely loved Scotland!! St. Andrews was great and I don't even like golf! :D Only disappointment was no Groundskeeper Willie sightings.
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • Jeremy1012
    Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    imalive wrote:
    The food wasn't great :p but I absolutely loved Scotland!! St. Andrews was great and I don't even like golf! :D Only disappointment was no Groundskeeper Willie sightings.
    That's because he lives in Springfield.


    And is a drawing.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • stu gee
    stu gee Posts: 1,174
    Judging by this person's apparent lack of knowledge about a foreign country, he's either having a joke, or he's American.
    People say im paranoid. Well, they dont say it, but i know that's what they are thinking.
  • duggro
    duggro Posts: 1,343
    raised a valid point about scotland though- we dont have the internet.


    if only a scottish person had invented the telephone, perhaps we would have benefited from the technological achievements that have occured in its wake, such as the internet.
    Dublin Leeds Berlin Wembley
  • stu gee
    stu gee Posts: 1,174
    Dont forget John Logie Baird's fairly popular invention they call the television.
    People say im paranoid. Well, they dont say it, but i know that's what they are thinking.
  • Collin
    Collin Posts: 4,931
    I just hope you can ride horseback!
    THANK YOU, LOSTDAWG!


    naděje umírá poslední
  • amentvedder
    amentvedder Posts: 3,610
    http://img444.imageshack.us/img444/1760/1180606885713ip5.jpg
  • dunkman
    dunkman Posts: 19,646
    duggro wrote:
    raised a valid point about scotland though- we dont have the internet.


    if only a scottish person had invented the telephone, perhaps we would have benefited from the technological achievements that have occured in its wake, such as the internet.

    yeah i was thinking, at least if this guy comes here and gets a nasty infection as a result of his many injuries at least he can rely on penicillin to heal him... :)
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • Wobbie
    Wobbie Posts: 31,225
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    That's because he lives in Springfield.


    And is a drawing.

    I was hoping he was home, "on holiday" (as you blokes say). :p
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • stu gee
    stu gee Posts: 1,174
    dunkman wrote:
    yeah i was thinking, at least if this guy comes here and gets a nasty infection as a result of his many injuries at least he can rely on penicillin to heal him... :)

    Or he can just drink himself into oblivion to numb the pain, perhaps with whisky.
    People say im paranoid. Well, they dont say it, but i know that's what they are thinking.
  • Jeremy1012
    Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    stu gee wrote:
    Or he can just drink himself into oblivion to numb the pain, perhaps with whisky.
    This thread is getting amazing.

    Mainly because Scotland is superior to all other nations and this has been beautifully fucking illustrated.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • stu gee
    stu gee Posts: 1,174
    For a country our size i think we've done pretty well, arguably right off the radar in terms of what countries have invented the most useful things. A Scot also invented the radar if i remember rightly, another handy wee tool.
    People say im paranoid. Well, they dont say it, but i know that's what they are thinking.
  • Why so serious?
    Why so serious? Posts: 48
    Will i have to wear a kilt all the time?
  • Why so serious?
    Why so serious? Posts: 48
    http://www.magicdragon.com/Wallace/thingscot.html
  • duggro
    duggro Posts: 1,343
    there's plenty to do here in this backwards country

    he could watch tv

    drive around in a hire car on its pneumatic tyres, but not too fast or a policeman could use a radar gun to catch him. he better keep an eye on his speedometer

    he could phone home

    go for a round of golf

    refrigerate some food

    go for a walk with some soup in his thermos flask

    microwave some food

    send some postcards with adhesive postage stamps

    spend some cash to help the economy which is monitored by the bank of england, and think about the economics in action on his trip- how exciting!

    visit some ports and docks, perhaps seeing some US Navy ships docked there

    do his finances, using the decimal point to be clear and concise

    clone some sheep

    get some penicillin using a hyposdermic syringe if feeling unwell

    eat some marmalade

    thats just some of the stuff we do for fun
    Dublin Leeds Berlin Wembley
  • duggro
    duggro Posts: 1,343
    Why so serious? wrote:
    Will i have to wear a kilt all the time?
    yes

    you will get the shit kicked out of you if you dont. the exit of the train station in edinburgh is a battleground, so be prepared.

    no pants underneath either
    Dublin Leeds Berlin Wembley
  • stu gee
    stu gee Posts: 1,174
    If you dont wear a kilt you will not be allowed to get off the boat. People who try to get off the boat with no kilt shall have the haggis' set upon them. See that film Critters, its based on haggis'.
    People say im paranoid. Well, they dont say it, but i know that's what they are thinking.
  • jonbond1779
    jonbond1779 London, UK Posts: 1,642
    Sian-of-the-dead wrote:
    You should be nervous... People like Dunk live there in little huts on Loch Ness with their battleaxe wives and ginger kids all dressed in kilts, sporrans and blue war paint. Internet-less and living off haggis, they sacrifice foreigners for sport.

    True story.


    LMFAO!!! XD
    "Bring it back, to the clean form. To the pure form"

    28/09/04 - Boston, 20/04/06 - London [\\mm//Astoria\\mm//] - 18/06/07 - Wembley Arena, 11/08/09 -  London [\\mm//Shepherds Bush Empire\\mm//],18/08/09 - 02 Arena, 25/06/10 - Hyde Park, 26/06/12 - Amsterdam, 27/06/12 - Amsterdam, 08/07/14 - Leeds,11/07/14 - Milton Keynes, 13/06/18 - Amsterdam, 18/06/18 - London 02 Arena, 17/07/18 - London 02 Arena, 08/08/22 - Hyde Park, 9/08/22 - Hyde Park - 25/08/22 - Amsterdam.
  • Jeremy1012
    Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    Why so serious? wrote:
    Will i have to wear a kilt all the time?
    The chance of receiving a glasgae kiss fae some wee cunt wi' a claymore and a vein fu' ae smack is increased hundredfold in people not wearing a kilt.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • Why so serious?
    Why so serious? Posts: 48
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    The chance of receiving a glasgae kiss fae some wee cunt wi' a claymore and a vein fu' ae smack is increased hundredfold in people not wearing a kilt.

    So if i don't wear a kilt some heroin addict wil headbutt me???
  • Jeremy1012
    Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    Why so serious? wrote:
    So if i don't wear a kilt some heroin addict wil headbutt me???
    If you want to butcher my beautiful prose, yes.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • dunkman
    dunkman Posts: 19,646
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    This thread is getting amazing.

    Mainly because Scotland is superior to all other nations and this has been beautifully fucking illustrated.


    :D
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • Heineken Helen
    Heineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    dunkman wrote:
    :D
    :D I agree... that's really funny! :p
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you

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