How do you win this argument?

locked
locked Boston Posts: 4,048
edited November 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
when someone says to you..

"Stop being so defensive"..

It seems any response is a validation.. yes?
"This here's a REQUEST!"
EV intro to Chloe Dancer / Crown of Thorns
10/25/13 Hartford
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • zacman13245
    zacman13245 Posts: 294
    I usually say something like, 'stop provoking me, you know this makes me angry.'
    I'm spinning, oh, I'm spinning

    6/30/2008 - Mansfield, MA.
    5/17/2010 - Boston, MA
    9/3/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
    9/4/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
  • mookie blaylock 10
    mookie blaylock 10 Posts: 4,042
    locked wrote:
    when someone says to you..

    "Stop being so defensive"..

    It seems any response is a validation.. yes?

    a shin to the face usually ends the argument. that would probably be considered "offensive"?
  • zacman13245
    zacman13245 Posts: 294
    mookie blaylock 10 wrote:
    a shin to the face usually ends the argument. that would probably be considered "offensive"?
    Yell obscenities, then they'll say, "Stop being so offensive and defensive." Then you can just cock your head to the side and look confused.
    I'm spinning, oh, I'm spinning

    6/30/2008 - Mansfield, MA.
    5/17/2010 - Boston, MA
    9/3/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
    9/4/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
  • unifiedscene
    unifiedscene Posts: 462
    Say "that's usually what people say to avoid having their ideas tested by vigorous critical debate. How about you respond to my argument instead of what you perceive to be my personality?"
    she was underwhelmed, if that's a word
  • zacman13245
    zacman13245 Posts: 294
    unifiedscene wrote:
    Say "that's usually what people say to avoid having their ideas tested by vigorous critical debate. How about you respond to my argument instead of what you perceive to be my personality?"
    owned, that wins in my book.
    I'm spinning, oh, I'm spinning

    6/30/2008 - Mansfield, MA.
    5/17/2010 - Boston, MA
    9/3/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
    9/4/2011 - East Troy, WI (PJ20)
  • meme
    meme Posts: 4,695
    I would say: "Ok, I'll try"

    That should catch them off guard, and then you can think about the least defensive thing to say in response next time. Without, of course, being a doormat. Something like "Please do not talk to me like that" or "I am confident that that was a good decision..." We know little about the context of the argument, so it's hard to give advice :)

    My hunch though is that if you think about it in terms of "winning the argument" then you may be a little defensive. Why not think about it in terms of coming to an agreement, or having a conversation, or trying to solve a problem?
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • sponger
    sponger Posts: 3,159
    Say, "Define defensive."

    When the other person begins to outline what he/she deems to be defensive behavior, say, "Oh, that's not defensive."
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • genie
    genie Posts: 2,222
    well, i don't see anything wrong with being defensive. screw those fuckers, just say whatever!
    or just say "it's in our nature to defend ourselves when some prick is trying to attack us, if we didn't do that humans wouldn't have evolved"
  • eyedclaar
    eyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    I usually say something like... "Fuck You!"
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

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  • locked
    locked Boston Posts: 4,048
    sponger wrote:
    Say, "Define defensive."

    When the other person begins to outline what he/she deems to be defensive behavior, say, "Oh, that's not defensive."

    unified's response almost won me over but this is pure brilliance!

    Love it!

    Thanks!
    "This here's a REQUEST!"
    EV intro to Chloe Dancer / Crown of Thorns
    10/25/13 Hartford
  • comfortably numb
    comfortably numb Posts: 188
    Usually if someone says that it means you're being too god damn defensive and maybe you should stop. Pretty simple.
    saw things so much clearer
  • Yellow Ledbelly
    Yellow Ledbelly Posts: 3,749
    eyedclaar wrote:
    I usually say something like... "Fuck You!"
    That was my answer
    All I have to do is revel in the everyday....then do it again tomorrow

    They say every sin is deadly but I believe they may be wrong...I'm guilty of all seven and I don't feel too bad at all
  • saveuplife
    saveuplife Posts: 1,173
    Kick em in the balls.
  • Lanegan7
    Lanegan7 Posts: 124
    Yellow Ledbelly wrote:
    That was my answer

    yeah mine too :D
  • RolandTD20Kdrummer
    RolandTD20Kdrummer Posts: 13,066
    zacman13245 wrote:
    Yell obscenities, then they'll say, "Stop being so offensive and defensive." Then you can just cock your head to the side and look confused.

    Which is why I prefer the rear naked choke.
    Progress is not made by everyone joining some new fad,
    and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
    over specific principles, goals, and policies.

    http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg

    (\__/)
    ( o.O)
    (")_(")
  • mca47
    mca47 Posts: 13,338
    locked wrote:
    when someone says to you..

    "Stop being so defensive"..

    It seems any response is a validation.. yes?


    Tell them "Well, the jerk store called and they are running out of YOU!"

    :D

    Then walk away victorious!
  • muiren77
    muiren77 Posts: 3,511
    ignore him/her and change the topic
    what is essential is invisible to the eye

    apparently, 07162056 is THE date...
  • seanw1010
    seanw1010 Posts: 1,205
    the best way to win any arguement:
    "no u"
    they call them fingers, but i never see them fing. oh, there they go
  • Austicman
    Austicman Posts: 1,328
    "Well I guess this arguments over if your throwing cliques like at me"

    Then follow it up with

    "Seriously, is that it? Is that the best you've got??"
    I can't go the library anymore, everyone STINKS!!
  • justam
    justam Posts: 21,415
    Wanting to win every argument instead of trying to work through the issue itself is probably the wrong approach in general.

    Everyone knows there's nothing wrong with defending yourself. If you don't, who will?

    This could be mentioned as a defense, (:D) but as someone else pointed out, perhaps you should stop and listen when someone says that instead of continuing to argue. :o
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&

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