The Promoter and The Artist (a rock opera)

FinsburyParkCarrots
FinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
edited April 2008 in Poetry, Prose, Music & Art
(Some promoters are lovely, but others, others are not ...)


Promoter:

If you don't dress like Chas or Dave
(albeit with pork pie hat and shave);
if you don't sing those altered thirds
like Sade sang for cocktail turds:
you'll never make it on this yacht.


You'll be the one that time forgot.




Artist:

I'd rather dress without a care
Than seek to fit in, anywhere.


I'll sing the notes that sing my heart,
Be damned if I'm too far apart
from what's accepted on this boat.


How a turd will rock and float!


Punter (fleeing):

Overboard! and swim for home!
Who likes music now? For shame!
The price of beer is way too steep
These days, to hope to woo and keep
a punter on this sinking liner ...

Promoter and artist:

Hey, come back, you fookin' whiner!
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • justam
    justam Posts: 21,415
    You don't really want to sing on a yacht anyway, do you?!

    :p
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  • FinsburyParkCarrots
    FinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    Ah, but yacht rock is infiltrating the acoustic music scene, you see. ;)
  • justam
    justam Posts: 21,415
    FinsburyParkCarrots wrote:
    Ah, but yacht rock is infiltrating the acoustic music scene, you see. ;)

    Oh.

    When I was a student I occasionally played "background music" for weddings on yachts. Yeck, yeck, yeck!! ...sometimes even the money in my hand didn't make it seem worth the drunk people and their stupid comments!!
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • olderman
    olderman Posts: 1,765
    his friends called him davey
    cuz he wuz in the navy
    and probably will be for life

    that's yacht rock at it's most awfull nes, eh?

    (sorry, billy j, but, for the most part, you are awful)
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • chadwick
    chadwick up my ass Posts: 21,157
    justam wrote:
    Oh.

    When I was a student I occasionally played "background music" for weddings on yachts. Yeck, yeck, yeck!! ...sometimes even the money in my hand didn't make it seem worth the drunk people and their stupid comments!!

    fins: good job dude


    you are awesome justly.
    that's a cool story.
    for poetry through the ceiling. ISBN: 1 4241 8840 7

    "Hear me, my chiefs!
    I am tired; my heart is
    sick and sad. From where
    the sun stands I will fight
    no more forever."
    Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
  • justam
    justam Posts: 21,415
    chadwick wrote:

    you are awesome justly.
    that's a cool story.

    I don't understand how complaining about some unpleasant job makes me awesome.
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • FinsburyParkCarrots
    FinsburyParkCarrots Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
    justam wrote:
    Oh.

    When I was a student I occasionally played "background music" for weddings on yachts. Yeck, yeck, yeck!! ...sometimes even the money in my hand didn't make it seem worth the drunk people and their stupid comments!!

    I think, from what I can see, a lot of pubs in the UK have been seriously hit by the smoking ban. PM Gordon Brown's gone mad, putting the price of beer up, too. So pub licensees who can't get full performing rights to put bands on are saying, hey, let's get some acoustic acts in to sit in the corner and play background music. They liase with promoters, who often pull in musicians under false pretenses (that they'll get paid if they bring in over a certain number of punters; that there's prestige in playing a venue).

    If you're a hardened muso who plays lounge covers for pay, fair enough. I know a girl who plays music at night on cruise ships, and she's prepared to put up with all the slime that goes with the territory. But I see some artists getting really pissed off and disheartened by their treatment. I'm not one of those. I'm getting some lovely gigs, in good places. But I know some whose talent is overlooked and/pr exploited by the current dictates of the marketplace.

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