The Promoter and The Artist (a rock opera)
FinsburyParkCarrots
Seattle, WA Posts: 12,223
(Some promoters are lovely, but others, others are not ...)
Promoter:
If you don't dress like Chas or Dave
(albeit with pork pie hat and shave);
if you don't sing those altered thirds
like Sade sang for cocktail turds:
you'll never make it on this yacht.
You'll be the one that time forgot.
Artist:
I'd rather dress without a care
Than seek to fit in, anywhere.
I'll sing the notes that sing my heart,
Be damned if I'm too far apart
from what's accepted on this boat.
How a turd will rock and float!
Punter (fleeing):
Overboard! and swim for home!
Who likes music now? For shame!
The price of beer is way too steep
These days, to hope to woo and keep
a punter on this sinking liner ...
Promoter and artist:
Hey, come back, you fookin' whiner!
Promoter:
If you don't dress like Chas or Dave
(albeit with pork pie hat and shave);
if you don't sing those altered thirds
like Sade sang for cocktail turds:
you'll never make it on this yacht.
You'll be the one that time forgot.
Artist:
I'd rather dress without a care
Than seek to fit in, anywhere.
I'll sing the notes that sing my heart,
Be damned if I'm too far apart
from what's accepted on this boat.
How a turd will rock and float!
Punter (fleeing):
Overboard! and swim for home!
Who likes music now? For shame!
The price of beer is way too steep
These days, to hope to woo and keep
a punter on this sinking liner ...
Promoter and artist:
Hey, come back, you fookin' whiner!
Post edited by Unknown User on
0
Comments
Oh.
When I was a student I occasionally played "background music" for weddings on yachts. Yeck, yeck, yeck!! ...sometimes even the money in my hand didn't make it seem worth the drunk people and their stupid comments!!
cuz he wuz in the navy
and probably will be for life
that's yacht rock at it's most awfull nes, eh?
(sorry, billy j, but, for the most part, you are awful)
As she slams the door in his drunken face
And now he stands outside
And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
And his tears fall and burn the garden green
fins: good job dude
you are awesome justly.
that's a cool story.
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
I don't understand how complaining about some unpleasant job makes me awesome.
I think, from what I can see, a lot of pubs in the UK have been seriously hit by the smoking ban. PM Gordon Brown's gone mad, putting the price of beer up, too. So pub licensees who can't get full performing rights to put bands on are saying, hey, let's get some acoustic acts in to sit in the corner and play background music. They liase with promoters, who often pull in musicians under false pretenses (that they'll get paid if they bring in over a certain number of punters; that there's prestige in playing a venue).
If you're a hardened muso who plays lounge covers for pay, fair enough. I know a girl who plays music at night on cruise ships, and she's prepared to put up with all the slime that goes with the territory. But I see some artists getting really pissed off and disheartened by their treatment. I'm not one of those. I'm getting some lovely gigs, in good places. But I know some whose talent is overlooked and/pr exploited by the current dictates of the marketplace.