reconnecting with old friends

CHANGEinWAVES

I'm going to be meeting up with a friend of mine who I was really close with in high school but lost touch with after graduation. It was me and her all the time in high school and I haven't seen her in 11 years.... I'm nervous!
We reconnected over facebook.... she's moved a lot (was a flight attendant and married a pilot) and we have been talking for a year on and off.

This is the first time she's coming home since we started talking again.... I hope things aren't awkward.

so has anyone started talking to an old friend after a really long time? how did it go?

wolfbear

I had that happen with a friend from jr. high/high school and it went really well. It was like we were never apart. Still are in touch today. Good luck though as I'm sure some don't work out.

CHANGEinWAVES

I feel silly for being nervous.... but 11 years is a long time!

Drop The Leash 10

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I feel silly for being nervous.... but 11 years is a long time!

dont you always feel silly? :P

CHANGEinWAVES

Drop The Leash 10 wrote:

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I feel silly for being nervous.... but 11 years is a long time!

dont you always feel silly? :P

i always AM silly... just don't feel it :P

xavier mcdaniel

I went to a 30th birthday party of someone I had not spoken to or run into since 1993. It was one of those facebook created events where all her friends were invited. It was fine. I was more comfortable talking to her then than in the eighth grade.

Brony

xavier mcdaniel wrote:

I went to a 30th birthday party of someone I had not spoken to or run into since 1993. It was one of those facebook created events where all her friends were invited. It was fine. I was more comfortable talking to her then than in the eighth grade.

yeah but what did you do when you werent talking to her? thats the pare where id be uncomfortable

nfanel

just last week i did this! it was a friend from middle school that i had lost touch with and reconnected with on facebook. we really had the best time catching up - it was like all that time hadn't passed! i have so many 'newer' friends down here in philly and it was great to spend time with someone who grew up with me. i felt like we had more in common now than back then even!

it's weird, but i felt nervous beforehand, too....turns out it was for nothing!

xavier mcdaniel

Brony wrote:

xavier mcdaniel wrote:

I went to a 30th birthday party of someone I had not spoken to or run into since 1993. It was one of those facebook created events where all her friends were invited. It was fine. I was more comfortable talking to her then than in the eighth grade.

yeah but what did you do when you werent talking to her? thats the pare where id be uncomfortable

I talked to other people who recognized me and extensively with a girl who recognized me and wound up leaving the party to go drinking elsewhere before going home. The weird thing about those is for the most part, you go back to having a silent facebook friend until the next event.

Nothingman54

old friends have tried to connect with me over the past few years. i cant stand it. im not the same person i was back in the day and i could care less about them. i deleted my myspace page because they wouldnt leave me alone. i say make new friends. old friends are old for a reason

decides2dream

am i the only person left who truly has no desire to recoonect with people from my past that i never kept in contact with? :? seriously? there are many people in my past that i have lost touch with, and quite honestly....i just don't care, haha. and hey, i am not anti-social or anything, and it is cool to run into the occasional person, what have you. perhaps some old friends would be great to reconnect, i simply have no desire to actively seek anyone out. also why i don't join facebook, myspace, or any of those things.....i don't want to be tracked down by anyone and blah, balh, blah. and i know this in no way helps with your query :oops: ...just this thread got me thinking...


anyhoo, onward to your query! while i've never gone out of my way to reconnect with someone, i HAVE had onlines friends that become real life friends, and i've had real life friends that i did not see for years due to living in different countries, and we sporadically kept in touch, then got together again, etc. never as long as 11 years!...but none the less. i think if you have any sort of connection with someone, especially if it was a positive one, while it's normal to feel a bit nervous i think, i also believe you will simply naturally flow into conversation in person, and it won't be awkward with pauses, etc. at most, slightly awkward, but nothing unbearable. if you've already gotten back in touch online, a definite help to it being a truly enjoyable real-life reconnect! hope you have FUN!



ahhhh...nothingman, i'm not alone!

Bathgate66

A buddy of mine found me on facebook after like 20 years.
He lives up in North Jersey ( where I used to live and we used to work together )
it was fun hearing from him,

but there are alot of others who i kinda just ignore
cuz i cant be bothered or
i dont know who the hell these ( strange? ) people are !
( the names are unrecognizable ! )


LOL

xavier mcdaniel

decides2dream wrote:

am i the only person left who truly has no desire to recoonect with people from my past that i never kept in contact with? :? seriously? there are many people in my past that i have lost touch with, and quite honestly....i just don't care, haha. and hey, i am not anti-social or anything, and it is cool to run into the occasional person, what have you. perhaps some old friends would be great to reconnect, i simply have no desire to actively seek anyone out. also why i don't join facebook, myspace, or any of those things.....i don't want to be tracked down by anyone and blah, balh, blah. and i know this in no way helps with your query :oops: ...just this thread got me thinking...


anyhoo, onward to your query! while i've never gone out of my way to reconnect with someone, i HAVE had onlines friends that become real life friends, and i've had real life friends that i did not see for years due to living in different countries, and we sporadically kept in touch, then got together again, etc. never as long as 11 years!...but none the less. i think if you have any sort of connection with someone, especially if it was a positive one, while it's normal to feel a bit nervous i think, i also believe you will simply naturally flow into conversation in person, and it won't be awkward with pauses, etc. at most, slightly awkward, but nothing unbearable. if you've already gotten back in touch online, a definite help to it being a truly enjoyable real-life reconnect! hope you have FUN!



ahhhh...nothingman, i'm not alone!

I think you're in the minority. Most of us, including me have an inquisitive side to us, which leads to the desire to find and re-connect with people from our past. Whatever side of the fence you're on, nobody is wrong.

decides2dream

xavier mcdaniel wrote:

I think you're in the minority. Most of us, including me have an inquisitive side to us, which leads to the desire to find and re-connect with people from our past. Whatever side of the fence you're on, nobody is wrong.

i am an extremely curious, inquisitive person overall.....and i enjoy social interactions as you well know. i simply am not curious or inquisitive about people from my past. they're in my past and i've never been one for much looking back. sure, i enjoy my memories....just no need or true desire to reconnect. i'm about the future.


that said, i see more and more, i AM in the minority there...and that's a-ok. simply very interesting, and yes...i am curious about that. :P

Phantom Pain

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I'm going to be meeting up with a friend of mine who I was really close with in high school but lost touch with after graduation. It was me and her all the time in high school and I haven't seen her in 11 years.... I'm nervous!
We reconnected over facebook.... she's moved a lot (was a flight attendant and married a pilot) and we have been talking for a year on and off.

This is the first time she's coming home since we started talking again.... I hope things aren't awkward.

so has anyone started talking to an old friend after a really long time? how did it go?

Just have a few drinks...some glasses of wine...loosen up

If anything exciting happens take pictures and add them to facebbok so we can look :twisted:

CHANGEinWAVES

I usually have no desire to connect with old friends... This one caught me on line when I was going through the divorce shit and it turned out she was/is having trouble in her marriage as well. I guess it's like we've found a new way to connect aside from the past. I'm just nervous how it will be in person cause it's one thing to send messages but another to speak face to face.

Drowned Out

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I usually have no desire to connect with old friends... This one caught me on line when I was going through the divorce shit and it turned out she was/is having trouble in her marriage as well. I guess it's like we've found a new way to connect aside from the past. I'm just nervous how it will be in person cause it's one thing to send messages but another to speak face to face.

nah...you'll be fine. Most times old friends can pick up right where they left off.
I've made lots of friends online ('from scratch'), and have never once had an overly awkward experience in meeting them. Now, if you're talking romantic chemistry, that's a whole new ballgame...

decides2dream

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I usually have no desire to connect with old friends... This one caught me on line when I was going through the divorce shit and it turned out she was/is having trouble in her marriage as well. I guess it's like we've found a new way to connect aside from the past. I'm just nervous how it will be in person cause it's one thing to send messages but another to speak face to face.

that makes total sense...whether an old friend, or a new. we all *connect* so much more over something shared, good or bad, especilly when in the throes of things. i say, don't overthink it. besides which, what do you have to lose? so just go into it for what it is, a reconnection, enjoy it, see where it takes you. and i do hope you have FUN.

CHANGEinWAVES

Drowned Out wrote:

Now, if you're talking romantic chemistry, that's a whole new ballgame...

It's a girl

Drowned Out

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

Drowned Out wrote:

Now, if you're talking romantic chemistry, that's a whole new ballgame...

It's a girl

I know...
I also know you weren't talking romantic chemistry...just sayin
Have fun! Can never have too many good friends


(sheee-it. you just burst my CiW could-be-bi bubble :P )

soulsinging

decides2dream wrote:

xavier mcdaniel wrote:

I think you're in the minority. Most of us, including me have an inquisitive side to us, which leads to the desire to find and re-connect with people from our past. Whatever side of the fence you're on, nobody is wrong.

i am an extremely curious, inquisitive person overall.....and i enjoy social interactions as you well know. i simply am not curious or inquisitive about people from my past. they're in my past and i've never been one for much looking back. sure, i enjoy my memories....just no need or true desire to reconnect. i'm about the future.

that said, i see more and more, i AM in the minority there...and that's a-ok. simply very interesting, and yes...i am curious about that. :P

You need to watch High Fidelity again. All will be revealed

CHANGEinWAVES

So last night was the night her and I met up again.
Needless to say there was lots of alcohol consumption and lots of good conversation.
It was like 11 years hadn't passed
She was the same person and we got along great!
There's even talk about me heading out to Milwaukee to see her after the Chicago shows.
Unfortunately she had to leave early (Saturday instead of Monday) because her 2 year old daughter fell and needed stitches.