Son-In-Law's Birthday
Heatherj43
Posts: 1,254
My son-in-law passed away September of 2007. He died from a drug overdose at age 29. Today is his birthday.
I miss him so much. I never thought I would miss him like this, but I kinda raised him throughout his teen years. He lived in my household about 8 years and is the father to my grandson.
I don't know why I am posting this here. I guess its because I just realized what date it is; I keep a lot of my grief bottled up, so my daughter and her son can express their grief easier to me; so I don't sound like I can't get pass it; etc.
This guy never had a chance. Both parents are terrible drug addicts/alcoholics. His mother spent all 3 days of the wake outside doing crack, while dear dad drank himself silly. This is the way it was all his years. He is the oldest of 5 children and had to raise them.
He never knew that some people can socially drink or don't drink at all. I helped him go to a treatment center back several years ago. He stayed for 6 months. He seemed so excited when he got out. He learned things he never knew. He returned to his parents and guess what?? Yep, it was and still is nothing but a party house.
When he died, he had gone with his best friend up in northern Michigan so his friend could sell drugs to my son-in-laws family up there. Well, he ended up stealing drugs from his friend and died. His friend is in jail for manslaughter. He had never stolen from me all those years and I never even heard of him stealing, but that damn addiction had him by the gonads and killed him.
I know a lot of people see addiction as a weakeness in morality or a character defect. It is not. It is a hideaous disease. That's not to mean that there is no treatment or a lack of responsibility. There is no cure, but there is treatment. Like someone with diabetes, it is up to them to take the treatment and do what they are suppose to do to stay healthy. It is their responsibility if they do not and they pay the price. Not everyone has that within them to follow the protocol to stay well. Replace the word addiction with diabetes and its easier to understand.
The younger someone is the harder is it to do what is necessary to stay well, just as in diabetes. Add to that the lack of understanding by his parents and seeing his parents and everyone around him not do what they need to do to stay well. Addiction will end in jails, institutiuons, death, or a course of recovery that lasts the rest of ones life.
Addiction is a fatal disease.
I know many don't agree and here is not the place to teach what it has took me years to grasp, but that is what it is.
My son-in-law died from this disease and today is his birthday.
Happy Birthday Jesse! You are now forever young. I miss you and love you. I think of you every day. I see you in your son.
Love, Heather
I miss him so much. I never thought I would miss him like this, but I kinda raised him throughout his teen years. He lived in my household about 8 years and is the father to my grandson.
I don't know why I am posting this here. I guess its because I just realized what date it is; I keep a lot of my grief bottled up, so my daughter and her son can express their grief easier to me; so I don't sound like I can't get pass it; etc.
This guy never had a chance. Both parents are terrible drug addicts/alcoholics. His mother spent all 3 days of the wake outside doing crack, while dear dad drank himself silly. This is the way it was all his years. He is the oldest of 5 children and had to raise them.
He never knew that some people can socially drink or don't drink at all. I helped him go to a treatment center back several years ago. He stayed for 6 months. He seemed so excited when he got out. He learned things he never knew. He returned to his parents and guess what?? Yep, it was and still is nothing but a party house.
When he died, he had gone with his best friend up in northern Michigan so his friend could sell drugs to my son-in-laws family up there. Well, he ended up stealing drugs from his friend and died. His friend is in jail for manslaughter. He had never stolen from me all those years and I never even heard of him stealing, but that damn addiction had him by the gonads and killed him.
I know a lot of people see addiction as a weakeness in morality or a character defect. It is not. It is a hideaous disease. That's not to mean that there is no treatment or a lack of responsibility. There is no cure, but there is treatment. Like someone with diabetes, it is up to them to take the treatment and do what they are suppose to do to stay healthy. It is their responsibility if they do not and they pay the price. Not everyone has that within them to follow the protocol to stay well. Replace the word addiction with diabetes and its easier to understand.
The younger someone is the harder is it to do what is necessary to stay well, just as in diabetes. Add to that the lack of understanding by his parents and seeing his parents and everyone around him not do what they need to do to stay well. Addiction will end in jails, institutiuons, death, or a course of recovery that lasts the rest of ones life.
Addiction is a fatal disease.
I know many don't agree and here is not the place to teach what it has took me years to grasp, but that is what it is.
My son-in-law died from this disease and today is his birthday.
Happy Birthday Jesse! You are now forever young. I miss you and love you. I think of you every day. I see you in your son.
Love, Heather
Save room for dessert!
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★ 2009 - Sydney, Brisbane, Auckland, Christchurch ★
★ 2011 - EV Newcastle, Melbourne 1, Melbourne 2 ★
..sending you blessings and good vibes
"Forgive every being,
the bad feelings
it's just me"
Well put. Addictions have been the theme in my life of late - 2 family members and 1 close friend. Thankfully all are now in a state of recovery. I'm sorry your son-in-law couldn't remain in his.
I love PJ fans. They have such warm hearts.
Thanks, Heather