wow, what could have been

Fighting Hellfish

Ran into an old friend from HS...a girl friend, but not a girlfriend. Beautiful, and one of the nicest people I've ever known. I was in love with her. Turns out, she married someone who looks just like me. We were really good friends, and I was too scared/shy/chickenshit to ever make a move. She's still beautiful, actually more so now 15 years later, and still really nice. Aaaaah, what are you gonna do?

Wobbie

You can spend your time alone, re-digesting past regrets
Or you can come to terms and realize
You're the only one who can't forgive yourself
Makes much more sense, to live in the present tense

decides2dream

go home...hug your wife and children, if you have em.....and be happy with the choices you made. life is full of 'what-ifs'......but they also include, if you DId make that different choice, what else might be different....and would you actually be happier or not? one will never know really, so best to focus on what you have, be thankful, and enjoy.



even better.......

imalive wrote:

You can spend your time alone, re-digesting past regrets
Or you can come to terms and realize
You're the only one who can't forgive yourself
Makes much more sense, to live in the present tense

absolutely!

Yellow Ledbelly

imalive wrote:

You can spend your time alone, re-digesting past regrets
Or you can come to terms and realize
You're the only one who can't forgive yourself
Makes much more sense, to live in the present tense

I let the two most wonderful ladies I have ever known in my life slip through my fingers -- especially true with the second one -- and that song has always helped me to put things in perspective. I may have missed out on what might have been a life-long relationship as husband and wife with those two, but both of them are very dear friends to me now...probably the best two I have actually.
With the first one, though, there was never really any chance we would end up together even though we listened to everyone else saying for years that we would end up married.
the second one, however, is different and I really feel like I blew it sometimes, but it's hard to imagine us not having what we do now because I have had such a caring and open relationship of any kind.
You've got to be happy with what you've got

blackredyellow

decides2dream wrote:

go home...hug your wife and children, if you have em.....and be happy with the choices you made. life is full of 'what-ifs'......but they also include, if you DId make that different choice, what else might be different....and would you actually be happier or not? one will never know really, so best to focus on what you have, be thankful, and enjoy.

I don't know what Hellfish's situation is but I'm my experiences these types of "what could have been" situations only come up when you are single... We've all gone down that road in our heads, but I can honestly say that since I've been with my wife, I haven't had those types of thoughts about people from my past.

AmentsChick

imalive wrote:

You can spend your time alone, re-digesting past regrets
Or you can come to terms and realize
You're the only one who can't forgive yourself
Makes much more sense, to live in the present tense

Dude...that was deep. You should make that into a song.

decides2dream

blackredyellow wrote:

decides2dream wrote:

go home...hug your wife and children, if you have em.....and be happy with the choices you made. life is full of 'what-ifs'......but they also include, if you DId make that different choice, what else might be different....and would you actually be happier or not? one will never know really, so best to focus on what you have, be thankful, and enjoy.

I don't know what Hellfish's situation is but I'm my experiences these types of "what could have been" situations only come up when you are single... We've all gone down that road in our heads, but I can honestly say that since I've been with my wife, I haven't had those types of thoughts about people from my past.

for some reason, i do have the impression - and i may well be wrong - but i thought hellfish was married w/kids...thus why said what i did. obviously, if i have him confused with someone else...well then....useless post. just chalk it up along with many, many others.

and as far as the 'what-ifs'.....while he said it, i do think many of us can just have a passing thought of our past, married or not...no threat to the urrent situation, nor a negative. not saying all will either, but depending on who was in your past, what went on, etc.....the thought can happen. i every so often wonder what happened to my first love, not b/c i want him...just b/c i am the wondering type, and sure, i am married a good long time. in no way diminishes the love i have for my husband.

patrickredeyes

Fighting Hellfish wrote:

Ran into an old friend from HS...a girl friend, but not a girlfriend. Beautiful, and one of the nicest people I've ever known. I was in love with her. Turns out, she married someone who looks just like me. We were really good friends, and I was too scared/shy/chickenshit to ever make a move. She's still beautiful, actually more so now 15 years later, and still really nice. Aaaaah, what are you gonna do?

Just smile and move on my friend.

Fighting Hellfish

I guess I should have noted that I am very happily married, with 2 kids. This girl was from high school, I married a girl I met in my 20's. I'm not unhappy, not llooking to dump the wife and start up with the HS girl.