My grandma just died?

bedface cooper.bedface cooper. Posts: 193
edited November 2007 in All Encompassing Trip
Since Sept 8th, she's first been to a hospital, then an old people's home and then a hospital again. Last Wednesday they brought her back home, and things got better first. On Sunday, however, she wasn't able to breathe anymore. We first thought it was over then. All of us said our goodbyes to her, my sister got home from Vienna. The next day, everything looked different. She spoke to us again, recognized us, even joked a bit. But we all sort of knew how this wouldn't last for long. Yesterday she already didn't really react on us, but still kept holding our hands when we took hers. Today, she was just lying there, looking horrible. The nurse who's been helping us decided that ... well, there wasn't really a thing to do except for waiting. She fought, and fought, and fought... She wouldn't want to leave us.

About an hour ago, she finally was released from her pain and fell asleep. She looks quite peaceful now.

It's the first time that I've lost someone who was THAT close to me.
I'm not really sad now, though.
I mean, of course it's gonna be weird without her, but I know how bad it was with her.
There was nothing we could've done now. Sitting beside her, 'taking care' of her, just made me feel so damn helpless. She was breathing so hard, was conscious only for a few seconds at a time.
I'm just a bit angry that everyone else wouldn't let me alone with her now so I can't have my goodbyes.

She was so lovely in the past days (when she was conscious anyways). Old people are becoming, in my eyes, a bit like kids again.

I don't really know why I'm writing/posting this, I just really felt the need to vent... I'm not really able to speak to my family now.
Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Oh..I am so sorry. I was just going to ask you about her with your song you posted.
    May she rest in peace.
    You are in my thoughts today.
    May you find some peace yourself.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • Trixie, thanks for your kind words.


    I don't really know how to feel at the moment.
    Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,410
    I'm sorry you lost your grandma. :(

    I hope you can cry with your family when you have the funeral. Maybe it'll make you feel closer to them again?
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    You are just in shock over the situation. You don't know how to feel because it isn't yet real to you.
    I am so sorry you are not being let alone with her.
    I have often found comfort in the company of older folks. I was 'raised' by 7 great aunts and uncles and their spouses. Large Polish family. They are all gone from me now and I miss their companionship.
    Again, I am so sorry.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Sorry to you and your family for your loss. Peace to you and yours.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • brainofPJbrainofPJ Posts: 2,361
    ah man, bedface cooper i am sorry to hear that. i lost my grandma almost three years ago and it has really affected me. i won't get into the whole story as i don't want to take over your thread, but even years later i am still pissed at myself...it's amazing.

    if talking about it here is somewhat of a release to you, go ahead...don't hold it in.


    Esther's here and she's sick?

    hi Esther, now we are all going to be sick, thanks
  • Thanks for all of your wishes... Weirdly enough, it helps :o
    justam wrote:
    I hope you can cry with your family when you have the funeral. Maybe it'll make you feel closer to them again?
    Maybe it will. I think it's a lot harder for them than for me, I've already sort of had the whole crying thing on Sunday, cause I felt so sorry for her. It's so hard for me to see my parents crying.
    TrixieCat wrote:
    You are just in shock over the situation. You don't know how to feel because it isn't yet real to you.
    I am so sorry you are not being let alone with her.
    I have often found comfort in the company of older folks. I was 'raised' by 7 great aunts and uncles and their spouses. Large Polish family. They are all gone from me now and I miss their companionship.
    Again, I am so sorry.
    I just sneaked in and then shut the door to say goodbye... I really couldn't do this with everyone around, it's so personal. But, that up there, that wasn't her anymore.
    Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
  • jojojojo Posts: 645
    Trixie, thanks for your kind words.


    I don't really know how to feel at the moment.


    there is no right or wrong way to feel so don't think that
    it's hard it gets more bareable
    i've been through it so many times all my grandparets and my dad have all past

    i wish you and yours all the best

    peace and love will get you through
    Ralph: Me fail English? That's unpossible.
  • edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    My thoughts are with you. So difficult losing those we love.
    My dad passed 13 years ago on Thanksgiving (well 11/24 to be exact).
    Hold onto your memories - they stay forever :)
  • Trixie, thanks for your kind words.


    I don't really know how to feel at the moment.
    I'm so sorry :o

    Don't worry about how you're 'supposed to feel', nobody knows in these situations. We're here anyway so you can keep talking :o
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • josevolutionjosevolution Posts: 29,519
    sorry about your loss ....if she is not suffering anymore then that is a good thing ...
    jesus greets me looks just like me ....
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    i'm so sorry for your loss...as to how you feel.....don't put much thought into it....your feelings will evolve over time.....
  • JulienJulien Posts: 2,457
    Sorry dude. We are all with you.
    2006: Antwerp, Paris
    2007: Copenhagen, Werchter
    2009: Rotterdam, London
    2010: MSG, Arras, Werchter
    2012: Amsterdam, Prague, Berlin
    2014: Amsterdam, Stockholm
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    I'm sorry for your loss :(
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • Thanks again to all of you :o

    I still remember one of the last things she said to me... She suddenly grabbed my hand really hard, and I was like "What's the matter, I'm here" and she looked at me, really awake, huge eyes and said "Really?". I replied "Of course, I'm taking care of you" and she was just like "Ok I'm fine then".
    sorry about your loss ....if she is not suffering anymore then that is a good thing ...
    That's what is helping me most now... She is 79 years old, she worked through her whole life, had problem with her knees and everything over the past years. She's somewhere better, she doesn't have to feel the pain anymore now? :o
    Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
  • Thanks again to all of you :o

    I still remember one of the last things she said to me... She suddenly grabbed my hand really hard, and I was like "What's the matter, I'm here" and she looked at me, really awake, huge eyes and said "Really?". I replied "Of course, I'm taking care of you" and she was just like "Ok I'm fine then".


    That's what is helping me most now... She is 79 years old, she worked through her whole life, had problem with her knees and everything over the past years. She's somewhere better, she doesn't have to feel the pain anymore now? :o
    aww she was glad you were with her. :o
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • Is it normal that she's to stay here, in her bed, like she was, until tomorrow? :o
    Kids! Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.
  • I'm sorry for your loss. Just feel whatever you're feeling...everyone grieves in different ways. She will always be a part of your life...the relationship you've had with her will always be a part of you.
    There's a light when my baby's in my arms :)
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    Take care, Bedface Cooper.
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • i am so truly sorry for your loss, my deepest sympathies to you and your family. you're right though, one one gets to reach a ripe old age, it's sad for those left behind.....but a blessing for those who go onwards. we all have our time. i am glad for your grandmother she had a long, full life...and many people who loved her. it's all any of us can wish and hope for.
    Stay with me...
    Let's just breathe...


    I am myself like you somehow


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