"Oh Tony", Jessica Simpson
Drop The Leash 10
Posts: 7,011
http://www.rollingstone.com/blogs/caprilounge/2008/05/jessica-simpsons-song-about-to.php
"Oh Tony"
By Jessica Simpson
(With Burt Bacharach)
I first met you at the ESPY awards
You were tall, I was todally boreds
When said you were a Dallas Cowboy
I said 'What's that?' My Dad groaned, 'Oy.'
But that night our love was easy to see
We went for Chicken Fingers at Applebees
You drank Coors Light and a shot of Patron
I had six appletinis and I passed out, gone
The next day we played catch with a Nerf
You kissed me on the lips and threw me on the turf
You introduced me to Terrell Owens and said he was the tops
I asked him, 'Damn, what up with all those end-zone drops?'
CHORUS
Oh Tony, Dallas really hates our guts
They'd like to sack us both on our butts
They hate me worse than the Giants or the 'Skins
They burn my records to avenge all our sins
Oh Tony, why do we have to hide our love?
When we go to Cabo and share a hot tub
When they say I hurt your game, it makes me real mad
Worse than that time Nick got punched by my dad
Oh Tony, why are you so upset
It's not like you're in Vegas and placed a bet
So what if you can't win a playoff game?
That Super Bowl thing is always so lame
After this year's drubbing I thought it'd be neat
To go hit LA with sister Ashlee and Pete
You and Wentz really seemed to bond
He'd say 'I'm with red, and lunkhead's with blonde.'
Then we'd go back to Dad's for Swedish massages
Hikes in the canyon and horse-y dressages
It's almost like we were Posh and Becks
With stranger relatives and smaller checks
CHORUS
Oh Tony, why can't you throw a pass
Without getting tossed on your ass
I'm sorry if it hurts and the pain makes you moan
But I'm tired of being embarassed in the ESPN Zone
Oh Tony, you must do it for me
Dad says I can't be seen with a back-up QB
I look my best for you, I do lots of self-tanning
You don't want me to do it for Eli Manning
Oh Tony, our love is like a double reverse
Sometimes it works, sometimes its the worst
I want to try and be all we can be
But you gotta win at least the NFC
"Oh Tony"
By Jessica Simpson
(With Burt Bacharach)
I first met you at the ESPY awards
You were tall, I was todally boreds
When said you were a Dallas Cowboy
I said 'What's that?' My Dad groaned, 'Oy.'
But that night our love was easy to see
We went for Chicken Fingers at Applebees
You drank Coors Light and a shot of Patron
I had six appletinis and I passed out, gone
The next day we played catch with a Nerf
You kissed me on the lips and threw me on the turf
You introduced me to Terrell Owens and said he was the tops
I asked him, 'Damn, what up with all those end-zone drops?'
CHORUS
Oh Tony, Dallas really hates our guts
They'd like to sack us both on our butts
They hate me worse than the Giants or the 'Skins
They burn my records to avenge all our sins
Oh Tony, why do we have to hide our love?
When we go to Cabo and share a hot tub
When they say I hurt your game, it makes me real mad
Worse than that time Nick got punched by my dad
Oh Tony, why are you so upset
It's not like you're in Vegas and placed a bet
So what if you can't win a playoff game?
That Super Bowl thing is always so lame
After this year's drubbing I thought it'd be neat
To go hit LA with sister Ashlee and Pete
You and Wentz really seemed to bond
He'd say 'I'm with red, and lunkhead's with blonde.'
Then we'd go back to Dad's for Swedish massages
Hikes in the canyon and horse-y dressages
It's almost like we were Posh and Becks
With stranger relatives and smaller checks
CHORUS
Oh Tony, why can't you throw a pass
Without getting tossed on your ass
I'm sorry if it hurts and the pain makes you moan
But I'm tired of being embarassed in the ESPN Zone
Oh Tony, you must do it for me
Dad says I can't be seen with a back-up QB
I look my best for you, I do lots of self-tanning
You don't want me to do it for Eli Manning
Oh Tony, our love is like a double reverse
Sometimes it works, sometimes its the worst
I want to try and be all we can be
But you gotta win at least the NFC
I will be what i could be
Once I get out of this town
9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
Once I get out of this town
9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
Post edited by Unknown User on
0
Comments
Once I get out of this town
9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
...
Jessica need to quit singing and go into the profession she rally needs to be in... PORN.
Hail, Hail!!!
Once I get out of this town
9/29/04;6/27/08;6/30/08;8/23/09;08/24/09;5/17/10
This is why terrorists hate us, that's hilarious.
How does one create such brilliance as these lines?????:
"I said 'What's that?' My Dad groaned, 'Oy.'"
"The next day we played catch with a Nerf"
"When they say I hurt your game, it makes me real mad"
"Dad says I can't be seen with a back-up QB"
But this is my favorite:
"Hikes in the canyon and horse-y dressages"
Just amazing.
No... they hate us because of this:
"But that night our love was easy to see
We went for Chicken Fingers at Applebees
You drank Coors Light and a shot of Patron
I had six appletinis and I passed out, gone."
...
That make ME want to crash into her house with a bomb vest.
Hail, Hail!!!