New years drug fest has ruined my friendship

pjfan31

I went to this New years eve concer called Shore thing which had 2 bands playing, Sneaky sound system and Groove armada. It is not my scene and i knew that about 80% of people there would be on drugs which i am totaly against and have never taken anything illegal in my life.

I went with a few mates and a mates girlfriend and her friends. I knew my mate and his girlfriend would be one of the thousands popping pills but i thought i would have 3 mates to stick strong with.

So it was probably 9 something i have already seen this girl presumably overdosed and it want a good site.

After 2 of my mates decided this wasnt for them they were going to go to another party and leave I thought I have paid $130 for my ticket and i wanna stay with my other mate so he doesnt get influenced by these other idiots and take drugs. I thought i will stick with him make sure he doesnt do anything (because he is a sheep, if one person does something so will he.)



After our other mates left he said "Oh your not going with them" I said "nah I told u i was going to stay here with you and we can see it out" he then starts saying "You will be best going with those other guys because I'm going to be hanging out with those guys" I said "You have taken something havent u u little prick" Hes like "No but u know wat im like, i probably will, go with those other guys we are going to get right amongst it (mosh pit/dance floor) and u wont like it" I said u have taken something havent u" "nah man I swear i havent but im going to hang with these guys." I said "Well tell me now because i will find out in a few minutes when it hits u" He smiled at me and said "yeh just a small one" I said "thanks for ruining my new yrs and walked off.

I refuse to be the only person not affected by drugs, and this so called mate of mine had said he hasnt touched anything since last new yrs and never will again he hates it, he has bad mouthed my other friends who do it and after i stayed with him so he wouldnt be tempted and after buying his ticket to this fkn thing i feel he has stabbed me in the back. I am so angry with him.

So after spennding $260 on tickets $100 on a taxi home, I was home before 11.50pm. I never liked new years i was hoping this would be different but it officialy rates as my worst. To make things worse I could of given his ticket to some hot german chick who i have be-friended in the last couple of weeks but i was already committed to my mate.

So I have known him since i was 4 so that is 18 yrs of friendship and at the moment I really dont feel like seeing or talking to this selfish prick.

Sorry for spilling all this out but i find it good to share my thoughts on here rather then bottling it up.

PJaddicted

I'm sorry your New Years was spoiled.....its hard to deal with drug and alcohol abusers when you aren't one. I have an entire family full of them,this is what I have learned you can't make someone stop taking drugs, you can choose to be their friends still, but just hang out with them only when they aren't doing them. You can have people in your life that take drugs, drink too much, you just have to make boundaries and take care of yourself. If I got rid of all the drug/alcohol users in my life, I'd have no immediate family left....so I just deal with them and worry about my own life.

oxc

harmless_little_f***

Sorry mate, you might not like what I'll say, but you were the one who decided to walk away.. Do you think Ed and the boys walked away from Mike? Not on the evidence of 'Save You'. Sounds like you decided to walk away from the friendship because he didn't meet your upright standards. He's not a 'selfish prick' just because he's got a problem you don't approve of.

South of Seattle

harmless_little_f*** wrote:

Sorry mate, you might not like what I'll say, but you were the one who decided to walk away.. Do you think Ed and the boys walked away from Mike? Not on the evidence of 'Save You'. Sounds like you decided to walk away from the friendship because he didn't meet your upright standards. He's not a 'selfish prick' just because he's got a problem you don't approve of.

I agree with Harmless.

It sounds like your friend just wanted to have a good NYE and take some E. It's his body, not yours. It doesn't even sound like he's got a drug problem either, it's a night of celebration and he wanted to take it a little further this evening. As long as he's not pressuring you or forcing you, then it's not your problem.

pjfan31

Yeh look, im just angry now, im sure i will cool it over with him. It was more to the point that 4 of us had said we werent doing any of that shit, 2 of my mates left, and i wanted to and had told him i was going to stay with him because i knew he would dfeel preaured to take something. He lied to me several times, and h pretty much told me "well look go home because i have taken drugs" he didnt want to be around me, he wanted to hang with these ppl we had jst met because they were into that scene. Ive seen drugs totally fuck one of my mates over before, i dont want it to happen to another 1.

i know i was the one who walked away but its sooo bad being the only one not on drugs, i have been that person before.

Anyway as Itchy and Scratchy once said 'Kids Say No To Drugs"

Happy new years ppl.

South of Seattle

pjfan31 wrote:

Yeh look, im just angry now, im sure i will cool it over with him. It was more to the point that 4 of us had said we werent doing any of that shit, 2 of my mates left, and i wanted to and had told him i was going to stay with him because i knew he would dfeel preaured to take something. He lied to me several times, and h pretty much told me "well look go home because i have taken drugs" he didnt want to be around me, he wanted to hang with these ppl we had jst met because they were into that scene. Ive seen drugs totally fuck one of my mates over before, i dont want it to happen to another 1.

i know i was the one who walked away but its sooo bad being the only one not on drugs, i have been that person before.

Anyway as Itchy and Scratchy once said 'Kids Say No To Drugs"

Happy new years ppl.

I know it sucks being the only person not on the specific substance. I would tend to think that most of us have been in that type of situation before.

But you basically went to a Rave, and at Raves there are TONS of drugs. You should have at least expected that this could happen and everyone there is going to be dosed.

Pegasus

pjfan31 wrote:

I went to this New years eve concer called Shore thing which had 2 bands playing, Sneaky sound system and Groove armada. It is not my scene and i knew that about 80% of people there would be on drugs which i am totaly against and have never taken anything illegal in my life.

sorry, but you set yourself up for it..
you should have gone to a party you KNEW was more to your taste.

harmless_little_f***

Pegasus wrote:

sorry, but you set yourself up for it..
you should have gone to a party you KNEW was more to your taste.

Yep, this is right. When in Rome, people will do what the Romans do, you can't help that.

It's like, when in Spain, you can't order bacon and eggs and fried bread accompanied by tacky English cabaret.

Oh, hang on...

justam

Pegasus wrote:

sorry, but you set yourself up for it..
you should have gone to a party you KNEW was more to your taste.

^^^^I feel this way too.

audiodave

I have to agree with everyone else here. You went to a rave. People do drugs there. A lot of them. And you can't get on a high horse because you are able to resist the peer pressure of doing them...not everyone is able to do that. Some people need to feel like they belong, and they end up doing things they normally wouldn't do. You might dissapprove, but it sounds like they KNEW you did, and it isn't like they were pressuring you to take anything yourself. You have to let people live their own lives. His actions didn't really hurt you, not in any significant way. I can understand you being pissed off that he lied to you, but that's becuase he knows your stance on drugs and doesn't want you to be mad. IMO it would have been much worse if he said "yeah I took something, here, you take it too!", but he didn't. I really don't think this is worth losing a friend over.

And I do understand your stance on drugs...mine is the same. If other people want to do them, then they will, and I don't have a MAJOR problem with it asling as they aren't addicts or dealers. They know my stance on it, they know it doesn't impress me, and I know they sometimes do it. I don't put myself in a situation where I know there will be drugs, as there's only gonna be one outcome...and it ends like this.

Sorry, but this is how I see it.

lalalalaaaaaaaa

Get new friends.

prytocorduroy

Don't let this ruin your friendship. He wasn't being an asshole to you. Besides, you were at a rave. If you were so against doing drugs what the f were you doing there in the first place????

Jeremy1012

pjfan31 wrote:

So I have known him since i was 4 so that is 18 yrs of friendship and at the moment I really dont feel like seeing or talking to this selfish prick.

Overreacting much? Christ, I get why you were annoyed but if you throw away 18 years of friendship because someone doesn't have the same views on drugs as you, I think it would be you with the problem, not him. I can't help agreeing with everyone who said you should have expected it. You knew that people would be taking drugs and you knew that he would too if offered. Don't put yourself in situations that you aren't comfortable with.

josevolution

yeah that sucks when i decided to stop doing the heavy drugs i mean coke ,pills anything like that all my friends knew that from that point forward it would be different, i only hung out when i knew people weren't going to be doing them ,just tell your friend if he wants to hang with you it will be in situations where it suits you best ....

urbanhippie

I'm sorry that you went to a place where you knew people were doing drugs and were surprised to see people doing drugs

And it's pretty sad thing to end such a long friendship because you have a difference of opinion.
I hope that you and your friend resolve your issues.

writersu

South of Seattle wrote:

I know it sucks being the only person not on the specific substance. I would tend to think that most of us have been in that type of situation before.

But you basically went to a Rave, and at Raves there are TONS of drugs. You should have at least expected that this could happen and everyone there is going to be dosed.

yeah, but be easy on this guy; I think he just wanted to help someone out. Maybe it was unrealistic, but I have been "there" with good friends and one of them does something like that and then you feel like you are out of the loop and can't even talk to these people who are presently out of your realm...., you know? when I was around people who were doing coke all of the time, I had a hard time because they were not at all able to talk to me in the same manner people talk when you aren't partying. Plus, when you're doing coke, (I am not sure about the ectasy thing but I know that coke was that way), you think that anybody who isn't is a drag, I think.

But that said, I also think it's important to remember this night and next time it's important to make sure you are having fun and all to not make plans that center around people who stand the chance of being people who will do this to you. I think you did an awesome thing; trying to be there for your friend, but you also deserve to have a good time and now you see that being there at the same place, although, again, a great thing, did not stop him from doing drugs.

happy new year though. perhaps a new year to start thinking about yourself and not always others?

the feng shui article I read said that you are to only think about the good on new year's day and not the things that are bad, leftover from the previous year.

Ledbetterman10

pjfan31 wrote:

I refuse to be the only person not affected by drugs, and this so called mate of mine had said he hasnt touched anything since last new yrs and never will again he hates it, he has bad mouthed my other friends who do it and after i stayed with him so he wouldnt be tempted and after buying his ticket to this fkn thing i feel he has stabbed me in the back. I am so angry with him.

So after spennding $260 on tickets $100 on a taxi home, I was home before 11.50pm. I never liked new years i was hoping this would be different but it officialy rates as my worst. To make things worse I could of given his ticket to some hot german chick who i have be-friended in the last couple of weeks but i was already committed to my mate.

So I have known him since i was 4 so that is 18 yrs of friendship and at the moment I really dont feel like seeing or talking to this selfish prick.

Sorry for spilling all this out but i find it good to share my thoughts on here rather then bottling it up.

I don't understand exactly what you're problem is. now, does your friend get all lethargic and ridiculous on whatever he's on? and what exactly is he on? acid? extacy? I guess being the only one NOT on drugs like those in a group of friends would be a bummer. but if they're only popping pills like vicodin or smoking pot, that's not a big deal. let them get they're kicks and they'll let you get yours.

pjfan31 wrote:

He lied to me several times, and h pretty much told me "well look go home because i have taken drugs" he didnt want to be around me, he wanted to hang with these ppl we had jst met because they were into that scene.

well, he does have to hide who he is and/or what he wants to do that night from you to keep you from whining

zenith

i agree in part with the guy above me ...

your talking about your mate being a sheep?? well he didnt have to hold your hand either did he? its nye - you'd have found and met god only knows how many people to chat with if you'd wanted.


but

i can feel for you about the whole drug thing. yknow - it was probably just because it was a big night, and he thought that he would have a bigger one if he did that. we all make stuff ups like that in our earlier years. Some people learn, but some dont, and it gets worse. he doesnt need you walking away and burning bridges right now.
you dont have to go out and be angry with him. but if he is really your friend - or ever was - just watch him.

brain of c

pjfan31 wrote:

I went to this New years eve concer called Shore thing which had 2 bands playing, Sneaky sound system and Groove armada. It is not my scene and i knew that about 80% of people there would be on drugs which i am totaly against and have never taken anything illegal in my life.

I went with a few mates and a mates girlfriend and her friends. I knew my mate and his girlfriend would be one of the thousands popping pills but i thought i would have 3 mates to stick strong with.

So it was probably 9 something i have already seen this girl presumably overdosed and it want a good site.

After 2 of my mates decided this wasnt for them they were going to go to another party and leave I thought I have paid $130 for my ticket and i wanna stay with my other mate so he doesnt get influenced by these other idiots and take drugs. I thought i will stick with him make sure he doesnt do anything (because he is a sheep, if one person does something so will he.)



After our other mates left he said "Oh your not going with them" I said "nah I told u i was going to stay here with you and we can see it out" he then starts saying "You will be best going with those other guys because I'm going to be hanging out with those guys" I said "You have taken something havent u u little prick" Hes like "No but u know wat im like, i probably will, go with those other guys we are going to get right amongst it (mosh pit/dance floor) and u wont like it" I said u have taken something havent u" "nah man I swear i havent but im going to hang with these guys." I said "Well tell me now because i will find out in a few minutes when it hits u" He smiled at me and said "yeh just a small one" I said "thanks for ruining my new yrs and walked off.

I refuse to be the only person not affected by drugs, and this so called mate of mine had said he hasnt touched anything since last new yrs and never will again he hates it, he has bad mouthed my other friends who do it and after i stayed with him so he wouldnt be tempted and after buying his ticket to this fkn thing i feel he has stabbed me in the back. I am so angry with him.

So after spennding $260 on tickets $100 on a taxi home, I was home before 11.50pm. I never liked new years i was hoping this would be different but it officialy rates as my worst. To make things worse I could of given his ticket to some hot german chick who i have be-friended in the last couple of weeks but i was already committed to my mate.

So I have known him since i was 4 so that is 18 yrs of friendship and at the moment I really dont feel like seeing or talking to this selfish prick.

Sorry for spilling all this out but i find it good to share my thoughts on here rather then bottling it up.

this is a 'you' problem. stay home next year.

brainofPJ

Saturnal wrote:

Get new friends.

yep...

genie

why didn't you join your other 2 "friends" reason why i say this word using this " is cause you all booked the tickets and then 2 people just decide to leave?? hmmm...not nice if you ask me.i'd be more pissed off with those two.

as for your buddy....well....drug ( just like food, sex ) is a temptation hard to resist. he was not hurting you right? why should he listen to you?

he is his own person and he can do whatever he likes as long as he is not hurting you in the process.

also, if you couldn't bear the thought of being with your friend when he's on drugs, how come you could tolerate an 80% of stoned crowed??

i'm glad i'm not your friend, cause i wouldn't want to have a friend who can end friendship because of such stupid thing.