Long Distance Relationships Whose in one?

BinGnarly

I'm currently in a long distance relationship. I live in Michigan and she lives in Maryland. We lived together on Mackinac Island this year (right by MI's upper Peninsula) and she came back to my place after the summer was over for a month. But now we only get to see eachother maybe once a month or once every two months and it really sucks. But we talk just about every day and have been using the internet to our advantage so we get to talk and see each other using Skype. I feel like it will last and we just have to make it a few more months before we can decide to move some where closer to eachother. But I was just wondering if anyone else is in a long distance relation ship and its working or have been in one.

comebackwoman

I've been in a long distance relationship for a little over 2 years. I'm in jersey and he's in australia so it's loooong distance...but it's working! Mostly cause we've had a plan in place of how to make it permanent (my permanent visa is pending) and because we always have a date of when we'll see each other again (usually twice a year). We've made it work but I will be sooo happy when the distance is no longer an issue. Good luck to you I know there are a few other people on the board in a similar situation and they've made it work too.

SVRDhand13

I'm in one. I'm in NY, she's in Virginia. I'm a law student and she just started her new job. So we don't see each other very often right now. Last year we were both in school together in upstate NY so we've only been long distance the past 6 months.

JordyWordy

yep currently in one, being apart is hard.

organising moving to other country is hard too. its all hard!! but im happy! and we see each other a lot anyway....its promising.

I dont know how long it would last if i wasnt trying to move country though?

like comebackgirl: seeing each other twice a year - i dont know if i could handle that!! congrats to u for doing it!

urbanhippie

100 miles is fairly long distance, especially 'cos I have children and babysitting is sometimes a problem. We've worked around it mostly okay, and have managed to see each other quite a few times this year.

All that will change shortly into the new year when he makes the big move up to mine

comebackwoman

JordyWordy wrote:

yep currently in one, being apart is hard.

organising moving to other country is hard too. its all hard!! but im happy! and we see each other a lot anyway....its promising.

I dont know how long it would last if i wasnt trying to move country though?

like comebackgirl: seeing each other twice a year - i dont know if i could handle that!! congrats to u for doing it!

congrats to you too! The immigration piece is the hardest part imo - waiting for the government to tell you when you're "allowed" to be together and how often and for how long you can visit. I'd give anything just to be on opposite sides of the country. It's a testament to the relationship though. Good luck with your move

unifiedscene

I might be the only one, but I love long distance relationships. I don't have to deal with the day-to-day emotional roller coaster of her work and friend drama. I can have my own life and hang out with whoever I want and do whatever I want. Then when we get together, it's always fresh, always exciting, and constant sex. We seek adventures because it all has to happen that weekend, rather than the humdrum routine when you're together and everything can wait for another day. They're the best!

HOOKER

He doesnt know we are in a long distance relationship.

JordyWordy

unifiedscene wrote:

I might be the only one, but I love long distance relationships. I don't have to deal with the day-to-day emotional roller coaster of her work and friend drama. I can have my own life and hang out with whoever I want and do whatever I want. Then when we get together, it's always fresh, always exciting, and constant sex. We seek adventures because it all has to happen that weekend, rather than the humdrum routine when you're together and everything can wait for another day. They're the best!

This is incredibly true. Being apart so much makes the time spent together REALLY good. its a totally different experience to regular dating.

Altho, i am lucky that when we do spends long times living & working together, that fun hasnt left us yet!

JordyWordy

comebackgirl wrote:

congrats to you too! The immigration piece is the hardest part imo - waiting for the government to tell you when you're "allowed" to be together and how often and for how long you can visit. I'd give anything just to be on opposite sides of the country. It's a testament to the relationship though. Good luck with your move

i know what you mean, it can take a lot of paperwork & money!! and yeah, it does make u realise how much u love them when you still want to do it despite the difficulty.

urbanhippie

unifiedscene wrote:

I might be the only one, but I love long distance relationships. I don't have to deal with the day-to-day emotional roller coaster of her work and friend drama. I can have my own life and hang out with whoever I want and do whatever I want. Then when we get together, it's always fresh, always exciting, and constant sex. We seek adventures because it all has to happen that weekend, rather than the humdrum routine when you're together and everything can wait for another day. They're the best!

There are definite plus points to a long distance relationship, but sooner or later you have to decide if thats enough, or if you want more.

youngster

BinGnarly wrote:

I'm currently in a long distance relationship. I live in Michigan and she lives in Maryland. We lived together on Mackinac Island this year (right by MI's upper Peninsula) and she came back to my place after the summer was over for a month. But now we only get to see eachother maybe once a month or once every two months and it really sucks. But we talk just about every day and have been using the internet to our advantage so we get to talk and see each other using Skype. I feel like it will last and we just have to make it a few more months before we can decide to move some where closer to eachother. But I was just wondering if anyone else is in a long distance relation ship and its working or have been in one.

I was in one for about 2 years. I lived in Florida and she lived in MA where I am originally from. I was in the Navy stationed in Jacksonville. We got together every few months or so and talked on the phone everyday. I had to leave on a 6 month deployment in 2003 so email was our only form of communication. At times it was tough and I wasn't sure if it would work out. We will be celebrating our 3rd wedding anniversary next week and have a beautiful 1 year old named Nathan. Long distance works if you're committed and it pays off in the end.

markymark550

I agree that lond distance can work if you're truly committed to the relationship. I was in one for about 4 years. We met my sophomore year of college. Due to the way the college set up the process to get to the upper level classes, for a couple of valid reasons she decided to transfer to a school about 120 miles or so away. During the week it wasn't feasible for us to see each other, but we talked every night and tried to see each other on the weekends. This continued on after getting my job out of college as the job was in the same city as my college and she had one more year of school left. Well, fast forward to today and we just celebrated our first wedding anniversary last Monday and are still very much in love.

South of Seattle

They suck, but are sometimes necessary.

Like unifiedscene stated, there are positives from it if you're used to a certain lifestyle or like to live a certain way. Although I'd much rather spend time talking to someone in person than on the phone.

zacman13245

I've been with my girlfriend for 2 years, and I think I'm going to have to go farther away for school. :( I feel bad, I dont want to do that to her

riffrandall

I think long distance relationships should actually be illegal :(

They are so painful & there is hardly any time to be happy. When you're not with the person, you're counting down the days to when you're going to see them (which makes it sort of hard to participate in your life) and when you ARE with them, part of the time all you think about is how much time you have left with them. So painful. This is- of course- assuming that you're in love.

The one and only benefit to them is when you break up you don't have to worry about running into the other person at the grocery store.

DOSW

urbanhippie wrote:

There are definite plus points to a long distance relationship, but sooner or later you have to decide if thats enough, or if you want more.

Exactly. I was in a relationship just like unifiedscene described and it was nice for a little while, but eventually that mindset just emotionally disconnects you from the other person. I used to see her every two weeks for a weekend, and those weekends were great, but we really liked each other so the other 12 days were always rough. And like I said, it causes you to disconnect from the person, and my mind inevitably began to wander to other people. And that's a sad thing.

yosi1

I'm in one right now. We got together my freshman year of college, her sophomore. This year I'm a senior and she's in her first year of law school at Notre Dame and I'm in upstate NY so we only see each other about once a month which is pretty tough. We talk usually once or twice a day, and video chat on gchat as much as we can. Its definitely tough, especially because we know that its going to be long distance for another two years after this one. But even though its incredible tough, its worth it.

I just can't wait for winter break (only two more weeks!) and than for the summer where she'll probably get an apartment in NYC...

SVRDhand13 wrote:

I'm in one. I'm in NY, she's in Virginia. I'm a law student and she just started her new job. So we don't see each other very often right now. Last year we were both in school together in upstate NY so we've only been long distance the past 6 months.

What college did you go to?

angie76

well it's a convenient arrangement for the noncommittal type. You don't have someone all up in your grill and you kind of can do anything you want...

But in all seriousness, I have seen it work. I think it depends on the 2 people involved, and good communication, lots of patience..etc.

Heineken Helen

it was definitely the best way to start a relationship for me... never really been in a committed relationship before this one... never wanted one! This one kinda happened by accident... and now I'm living with him in a different country The moving part can be stressful but it's definitely worth it. Been going out a year and a month and living together 2 and a half months.

Thoughts_Arrive

I don't think they work.

bee_boy

Someone once told me:

"La distancia es el aire que apaga el fuego corto y enciende el largo"

There's no right way to translate this, so roughly:

"Distance is the air that extinguishes weak fire and lights up the strong ones"

Wise, wise man.

I was in a long distance relationship for almost 3 years. I was in Sydney and she was in Lima (she then moved to Barcelona). In the end, the distance was stronger than our relationship.

Having been through a long distance relationship I can say that it's the ultimate test for commitment, so if you're madly in love, YOU WILL make it work. Unfortunately for us, that wasn't our case.

Happy ending: My ex started dating again and I fell in love with another girl and she's absolutely amazing

boxwine_in_hell

Well I had a couple in my life, I'm an old salty married guy now. But you know what? Long distance relationships rocked because you could go out and nail anyone without too much guilt or danger of being caught.

g under p

I'm in one from DC-Palm Beach, Florida 6 months together 6 off with the winters in FL. Broken up with week vacations or a cruise when we are apart with calls twice a day.

Peace

Heineken Helen

bee_boy wrote:

Someone once told me:

"La distancia es el aire que apaga el fuego corto y enciende el largo"

There's no right way to translate this, so roughly:

"Distance is the air that extinguishes weak fire and lights up the strong ones"

Wise, wise man.

I was in a long distance relationship for almost 3 years. I was in Sydney and she was in Lima (she then moved to Barcelona). In the end, the distance was stronger than our relationship.

Having been through a long distance relationship I can say that it's the ultimate test for commitment, so if you're madly in love, YOU WILL make it work. Unfortunately for us, that wasn't our case.

Happy ending: My ex started dating again and I fell in love with another girl and she's absolutely amazing

Wise words indeed! And I agree... if you've to spend so much time and money just to see the person, it HAS to be strong to keep going.

Hinny

15000km.

I don't see it as a relationship. More like voluntary torture.

DOSW

boxwine_in_hell wrote:

Well I had a couple in my life, I'm an old salty married guy now. But you know what? Long distance relationships rocked because you could go out and nail anyone without too much guilt or danger of being caught.

Yeah, cheating is so cool.