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why can you not change if you know you need to?

rjbukowskirjbukowski Posts: 117
edited December 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
why is it that even when I know, or people in general, know they need to change, improve, etc... they can not? What is it in people?
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • prismprism Posts: 2,440
    they can if they want to enough. but most people lack willpower. i mean oh yeah they'll talk on and on about how their going to change and/or what they're going to do to improve things...but when it comes to following through on actually doing something? well that might take some effort on their part...most often people are quite content to simply bitch and make empty promises than to take action






    myself i like action :)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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  • RolandTD20KdrummerRolandTD20Kdrummer Posts: 13,066
    Change!...there's that word again :D

    A lot of people find change stressful and avoid it subconsciously out of comfort in maintaining status quo.

    Pretty much the general understanding from the psychological aspects.
    Progress is not made by everyone joining some new fad,
    and reveling in it's loyalty. It's made by forming coalitions
    over specific principles, goals, and policies.

    http://i36.tinypic.com/66j31x.jpg

    (\__/)
    ( o.O)
    (")_(")
  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    youd be changing the instinctual(though not necessarily best) way youve been living. tis all you know. instinct is a difficult thing to counter at times.
    or you could just be lazy. :)
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • muiren77muiren77 Posts: 3,511
    Boo-ya wrote:
    why is it that even when I know, or people in general, know they need to change, improve, etc... they can not? What is it in people?

    because of lack of acceptance...knowing is different from accepting that there is a need to change or improve something...
    what is essential is invisible to the eye

    apparently, 07162056 is THE date...
  • unifiedsceneunifiedscene Posts: 462
    Boo-ya wrote:
    why is it that even when I know, or people in general, know they need to change, improve, etc... they can not? What is it in people?

    Because you've been living that way for years, if not decades. Your actions and reactions become almost automatic, Pavlovian. It takes a lot of effort and conditioning to break that, so it's only worth doing if whatever you want to change causes serious problems for you. Even then, it's not easy.
    she was underwhelmed, if that's a word
  • illegal pantsillegal pants Posts: 13,471
    pussies..

    change is always possible, in some form or shape

    sorry, venting off someone's tooletry
    wah
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    why change who you are? unless you're a serial killer or something... but otherwise, whats the point... its who you are!! why conform to what other people want you to be like?
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Boo-ya wrote:
    why is it that even when I know, or people in general, know they need to change, improve, etc... they can not? What is it in people?

    I think people can change it merely seems to take changing themselves internally first and sometimes that takes longer than everyone imagines it should.

    Also, I think it depends upon what needs to be changed. It seems like people who have alcohol, drug, cigarette, and over-eating problems have the added complication of their bodies getting dependent upon the additive and then they're prisoners of their bodies.

    So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that behaviors that involve chemical changes are probably a different animal than just changing one's mind about how to approach behavior of another type.
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • lalalalaaaaaaaalalalalaaaaaaaa Posts: 2,445
    Boo-ya wrote:
    why is it that even when I know, or people in general, know they need to change, improve, etc... they can not? What is it in people?
    hmmm...not my observations at all. Seems to me that when people truly need to change (for themselves I mean, not by anyone else's estimation) they do.
  • lephtylephty Posts: 770
    change is hard but not impossible. if you had told me last year at this time that i would be closing in on losing 70 pounds, i would have scoffed at you and probably shoved a doughnut in my mouth. yet here i am...
  • geniegenie Posts: 2,222
    illegal pants wrote:
    pussies..

    change is always possible, in some form or shape

    sorry, venting off someone's tooletry

    haha, well said
  • geniegenie Posts: 2,222
    i find that i changed gradually, i get influence a lot by other people, sometimes their thoughts become mine, but i think it only happens when i subconsciously like what they are saying. change of oneself can happen but it requires a lot of work and effort.
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    Human brains are full of faulty wiring, that's why. I'm surprised humans have children and don't eat them. Well, I do, but I fully embrace my faulty wiring...
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  • comebackwomancomebackwoman Posts: 7,271
    cause usually there's some ambivalence about making the change - and until you've worked through that, you're probably not ready for the change...part of you wants it, but part of you isn't so sure, so while you say you want to change, your behavior says you're not ready
    There's a light when my baby's in my arms :)
  • geniegenie Posts: 2,222
    eyedclaar wrote:
    Human brains are full of faulty wiring, that's why. I'm surprised humans have children and don't eat them. Well, I do, but I fully embrace my faulty wiring...

    are you saying you eat sperm? :D
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    genie wrote:
    are you saying you eat sperm? :D


    Well, no, but now I'm sugggesting you might have some trouble with reading and comprehension.
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  • geniegenie Posts: 2,222
    eyedclaar wrote:
    Well, no, but now I'm sugggesting you might have some trouble with reading and comprehension.

    i have a twisted mind ;) but not as twisted as yours, because you've written instead of suggesting - sugggesting ;)
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    genie wrote:
    i have a twisted mind ;) but not as twisted as yours, because you've written instead of suggesting - sugggesting ;)


    The extra g is quite common in American English. For example, your word "goggle" is actually spelled "ggoogggle" on this side of the pond.
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