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Crazy Teachers

mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
edited December 2012 in All Encompassing Trip
Any horror stories? Not sure what drudged up this memory from almost twenty years ago, but back in 7th grade my English teacher was fired for stopping the approved curriculum about halfway through the year and replacing it with us looking for subliminal messages in advertising. She wanted us to see penises in the ice cubes of ads for Dewars, breasts in the pupils of maybeline makeup models, and my personal favorite an ad that featured five kids on a bench, however six sets of appendages were present with the extra set signifying child molestation. This lasted about two weeks until she was canned. So have any of you had any nutbags for teachers/professors?
"The leads are weak!"

"The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

"What's your name?"

"FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
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  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    of course!! Crazy ass nuns!!! ;)

    And....I am married to a crazy-assed teacher!!
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Lizard wrote:

    And....I am married to a crazy-assed teacher!!

    Does he use a ruler? ;)
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Any horror stories? Not sure what drudged up this memory from almost twenty years ago, but back in 7th grade my English teacher was fired for stopping the approved curriculum about halfway through the year and replacing it with us looking for subliminal messages in advertising. She wanted us to see penises in the ice cubes of ads for Dewars, breasts in the pupils of maybeline makeup models, and my personal favorite an ad that featured five kids on a bench, however six sets of appendages were present with the extra set signifying child molestation. This lasted about two weeks until she was canned. So have any of you had any nutbags for teachers/professors?

    I rubbed my hands with glee when I read this question. Then I read your story and felt I couldn't compete with that.

    I had a teacher that used to sniff the magic markers and roll his eyes into the back of his head but... nope, still not as crazy as your friggin crazy teacher.
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Does he use a ruler? ;)
    only when i dress up like a naughty catholic school girl!!!
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • josevolutionjosevolution Posts: 29,204
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Does he use a ruler? ;)

    now that is funny :)
    jesus greets me looks just like me ....
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Lizard wrote:
    only when i dress up like a naughty catholic school girl!!!

    This thread is use... ah, getting off topic. Back to crazies people! Back to crazies!!!!
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    Two girls in my high school class ended up marrying teachers/coaches from my school.

    Oh yeah.......my son's spanish teacher from last year was drunk this summer and freaking waved a gun at a fast food window because his fricking burrito was not there fast enough!!!!!!!!!! He is still teaching!!!
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • OttOtt Posts: 403
    I plan on becoming a crazy ass teacher. Got started on the Friday before Xmas break. I had the kids doing Acrostic poems (something light after a rough essay project); but I had the new Italian DVD playing on the projector all day. Some of them loved it! The skater kids were especially pleased to see Jeff rippin it up after a fence jump. Nioce!

    But my Sr Eng teacher also did an extensive subliminary advertising unit. Except the searches didn't include actual "units," just the word sex in ice cubes and cigarrette smoke.

    Ott
    'Give me some music; music, moody food/ of us that trade in love'
    -Shakespeare
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    let's see.....my 9th grade english teacher had us analyze the word fuck.....one teacher took me out of class and called me an asshole (very proud of that :) ) this same teacher is now married to one of his former students....:eek: :D
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    And........in high school (Catholic mind you) this crazy ass nun was passing around different contraceptives for us to learn about!! So I was the last desk in the line and eventually had all these rubbers, IUDs, etc. piling up on my desk!!!!! I didn’t know where to look :o
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    Lizard wrote:
    had all these rubbers, IUDs, etc. piling up on my desk!!!!! I didn’t know where to look :o

    rubbers! haven't heard that one in a loooooong time. you must be 30+ years old! ha ha.
    I remember my dad used to have thes "rubbers" he put over his shoes when it rained out and every time he said that word I just used to laugh....
  • OttOtt Posts: 403
    Oh. and my Frosh Lit Prof in College thought of Bob Dylan as we do ed and the band. So, we did an EXTENSIVE Dylan as poet unit, culminating with the entire auditorium (250+ students) rocking out to Dylan as loud as the speaker system could handle as we "read" the lyrics. I so can't wait to do that with PJ.
    And she only wore Birkenstocks. I had her three different semesters, and she'd talk about it. She didn't just have the Jesus sandals, no she had every incarnation of Birkenstock shoes ever. Said that once she put on her irst pair, she knew she'd never wear anything else.
    And I don't know, but I'm pretty sure she smoked.

    Ott
    'Give me some music; music, moody food/ of us that trade in love'
    -Shakespeare
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    edvedder913 wrote:
    rubbers! haven't heard that one in a loooooong time. you must be 30+ years old! ha ha.
    I remember my dad used to have thes "rubbers" he put over his shoes when it rained out and every time he said that word I just used to laugh....

    Shit.
    who knew the word RUBBER would give away me age!
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Another teacher of mine (not as crazy as the first) was my auto shop teacher. I had absolutely no interest in repairing cars however word spread that it was a guaranteed "A" along with drinking going on in class. Unfortunately I had it first period so there went the drinking aspect, but the "A" was true. He would ask us to read 100 pages of the textbook a week, and then would give us a three hundred question exam at the end of the week. I would usually get between 30 and 40 correct (love those scantron sheets) to which he would yell and scream at everyone who didn't pass, get really red in the face, start sweating, and then storm out of the room. But you would still receive an "A". Unfortunately, about halfway through the year that poor man died in a single car accident when he rolled his Jeep. At that point I was officially fucked as the person who took over was serious and actually grading us. I ended up skating by with a "C-".
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    I have to tell you about my 10th grade science teacher. he was a total pervie letch! he was an amateur bodybuilder - and he used to pass around pictures of himself working out and in competition wearing a banana sling and a stupid smile it looked like he had been greased too - it was gross! the man was in his 50's!
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    failedpersephone wrote:
    I have to tell you about my 10th grade science teacher. he was a total pervie letch! he was an amateur bodybuilder - and he used to pass around pictures of himself working out and in competition wearing a banana sling and a stupid smile it looked like he had been greased too - it was gross! the man was in his 50's!

    Good ole Dad! Never goes far without his polaroids! :D
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • AllNiteThingAllNiteThing Posts: 1,114
    Oh yea!

    My senior year math teacher was retiring that year because he was training to be a mortician!!!! Yikes. I saw him shopping for headstones at a local Hewitt's that year. He actually was the funeral home director for my grandfather a few years later.

    My junior year math teacher takes the cake though. There were a ton of stories about him having hallucinations and being wacky BEFORE I had him. A few times during test, he would sit at his desk, flip his briefcase top up and all you could see were his eyes over the top, and him kinda bouncing up and down. Of course, there were hot chicks in my class. He used to always leave the classroom unannounced for no apparent reason. To get a drink or something. Once he left, came back ten minutes later giggling. He had a handful of snow. Chucked some at a friend of mine, who threw it back and splattered on the blackboard. The teacher took the rest he had a wailed it at the quietest, mousiest girl in the back of the room and hit her square in the face, made her cry. It was amazing. Another time during a lesson he threw high chalk down, walked over to a picture of him and his family on the wall, tore it up and walked out the room. Nobody was talking or being disruptive either. But THIS takes the cake... (same teacher)

    Late in the year we came to school in the morning and heard a rumor the teacher was on 'leave'. Long story short, he was walking around down in Albany in the park, alone at around 2am. Naked, dog collar and belly ring with a chain to the collar. He walked up to a group of guys in the park, asked to be spanked and he was pummeled. He stumbled into a local bar for help, and well let's just say he no longer teaches.

    There are many more stories associated with this guy and the 'incident' has a few more details to it, but that's the gist of it. Is that crazy enough? :D
    24 years old, mid-life crisis
    nowadays hits you when you're young
  • Glorified Irish GuyGlorified Irish Guy Posts: 350
    AllNiteThing wrote:
    Oh yea!

    My senior year math teacher was retiring that year because he was training to be a mortician!!!! Yikes. I saw him shopping for headstones at a local Hewitt's that year. He actually was the funeral home director for my grandfather a few years later.

    My junior year math teacher takes the cake though. There were a ton of stories about him having hallucinations and being wacky BEFORE I had him. A few times during test, he would sit at his desk, flip his briefcase top up and all you could see were his eyes over the top, and him kinda bouncing up and down. Of course, there were hot chicks in my class. He used to always leave the classroom unannounced for no apparent reason. To get a drink or something. Once he left, came back ten minutes later giggling. He had a handful of snow. Chucked some at a friend of mine, who threw it back and splattered on the blackboard. The teacher took the rest he had a wailed it at the quietest, mousiest girl in the back of the room and hit her square in the face, made her cry. It was amazing. Another time during a lesson he threw high chalk down, walked over to a picture of him and his family on the wall, tore it up and walked out the room. Nobody was talking or being disruptive either. But THIS takes the cake... (same teacher)

    Late in the year we came to school in the morning and heard a rumor the teacher was on 'leave'. Long story short, he was walking around down in Albany in the park, alone at around 2am. Naked, dog collar and belly ring with a chain to the collar. He walked up to a group of guys in the park, asked to be spanked and he was pummeled. He stumbled into a local bar for help, and well let's just say he no longer teaches.

    There are many more stories associated with this guy and the 'incident' has a few more details to it, but that's the gist of it. Is that crazy enough? :D

    If this thread was a competition you win, or..he wins
    I came from a pretty normal school, had a few weird teachers nothing to really top that, had a couple of stoner art teachers and a nutty geo teacher
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    AllNiteThing wrote:
    Oh yea!

    My senior year math teacher was retiring that year because he was training to be a mortician!!!! Yikes. I saw him shopping for headstones at a local Hewitt's that year. He actually was the funeral home director for my grandfather a few years later.

    My junior year math teacher takes the cake though. There were a ton of stories about him having hallucinations and being wacky BEFORE I had him. A few times during test, he would sit at his desk, flip his briefcase top up and all you could see were his eyes over the top, and him kinda bouncing up and down. Of course, there were hot chicks in my class. He used to always leave the classroom unannounced for no apparent reason. To get a drink or something. Once he left, came back ten minutes later giggling. He had a handful of snow. Chucked some at a friend of mine, who threw it back and splattered on the blackboard. The teacher took the rest he had a wailed it at the quietest, mousiest girl in the back of the room and hit her square in the face, made her cry. It was amazing. Another time during a lesson he threw high chalk down, walked over to a picture of him and his family on the wall, tore it up and walked out the room. Nobody was talking or being disruptive either. But THIS takes the cake... (same teacher)

    Late in the year we came to school in the morning and heard a rumor the teacher was on 'leave'. Long story short, he was walking around down in Albany in the park, alone at around 2am. Naked, dog collar and belly ring with a chain to the collar. He walked up to a group of guys in the park, asked to be spanked and he was pummeled. He stumbled into a local bar for help, and well let's just say he no longer teaches.

    There are many more stories associated with this guy and the 'incident' has a few more details to it, but that's the gist of it. Is that crazy enough? :D

    they didn't spank him?? maybe he didn't say please.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • SpunkieSpunkie I come from downtown. Posts: 6,441
    "If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding.
    How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat." -Pink Floyd
  • GreenTeaDiseaseGreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    god, where do I start.

    I had this teacher in 5th grade...she was new to the school. this was back when 5th grade was still elementary so we had her all day. She was like 300-400 lbs and she just sat in her chair all day and did nothing except order kids to go to the snack sale and buy her chips and cookies (and she also liked to have us rearrange our desks like every day). I remember that about 1 week before the school year ended, it came to the principal's attention that she hadn't had us do ANY reading class all year. we hadn't cracked our reading books. So she made us do the entire year's worth of reading curriculum in about 1 week. all the reading, questions, etc. and she made everyone do the same work rather than splitting into reading groups as was the norm. needless to say the parents were pissed but somehow she didn't get fired!
  • drtyfrnk29drtyfrnk29 Posts: 846
    I had this geometry teacher my sophmore year of high school absolutely freak out during class. It was an all boys catholic school so we were a little rowdy to say the least. Well, this cat goes off the deep end. He starts cussing at us. Not just obscenities into the room in general but he was singling people out. (Think I was called a mama's boy) Then he goes to his desk and starts shoving everything off of it and saying Fuck this under his breath. Now the room was silent. For his finale he grabs the test we had taken the other day and starts ripping them apart and throwing them into the hallway outside the classroom. Our vice principal had to take him home that day and we didnt see him for about three weeks.

    Another time, again in sophmore year, we were viciously toturing a teacher. We put a banana peel in his jacket pocket, someone slapped a piece of bologna to the TV mounted in the room...you name it. Well, he gets all butt hurt and bolts. The next day our sub walks in and goes on this tirade. He was pacing in front of our desks with a banana peel asking who wanted it in the face. He started rolling up his sleeves and threatening anyone who wanted to fight. I guess our regular teacher was his best friend and he was looking to square up on his behalf.
    I'm so dangerous I smoke dynamite.

  • haffajappahaffajappa Posts: 5,955
    wow... some of these are amazing!
    my moms a teacher, she tells me funny stuff all the time but nothing to top those...

    as for me, in high school...nothing like that. i mean, there was a teacher who married his former student (the story goes something like he let her stay in his basement when she got kicked out of her house, started cheating on his wife with her and later married her and had a new baby with her)

    i had a biology teacher that lived on a boat, he'd come back from some huge expedition and look like tom hanks in castaway (which became his nickname for a while) he was cool. he'd bring his dog with him to class... class was easy too.
    live pearl jam is best pearl jam
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Not so much crazy, but different. (Damn I had a lot of crazies teach me. Definitely explains a lot!) Every day my history teacher in my junior year of high school would talk in a monotone that would put a rave attending, ecstacy filled perez hilton to fall asleep. That is everyday except when he would dress up as a historical figure. Three times a year he would go out and rent elaborate costumes to perform as the following: Teddy Roosevelt, General George S. Patton, and for his grand finale, Hitler. For Hitler he would bring in senior members from his class the previous year (who also were in costume) as soldiers who would physically remove you from the room (if you asked an inappropriate question) and take you outside and "beat" you to death. He would even go so far as to shave his very thick moustache down for the day into a Hitler stache. I'm thinking he couldn't get away with that one any more. I always wondered what would happen if he was pulled over by the police on the day of his presentation.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    my history teacher senior year had lined up to have the local congressman speak to the class......the day before he was scheduled, it came up in class that the most of the class wouldn't be able to attend because the football team made it to the playoffs (small school - the whole 8-man football team was comprised of seniors)....anyway, when we told her this, she walked behind the map of the us and cried.....it still makes me laugh....did she honestly think SENIORS are really interested in school??? ;):D:D
  • haffajappahaffajappa Posts: 5,955
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Not so much crazy, but different. (Damn I had a lot of crazies teach me. Definitely explains a lot!) Every day my history teacher in my junior year of high school would talk in a monotone that would put a rave attending, ecstacy filled perez hilton to fall asleep. That is everyday except when he would dress up as a historical figure. Three times a year he would go out and rent elaborate costumes to perform as the following: Teddy Roosevelt, General George S. Patton, and for his grand finale, Hitler. For Hitler he would bring in senior members from his class the previous year (who also were in costume) as soldiers who would physically remove you from the room (if you asked an inappropriate question) and take you outside and "beat" you to death. He would even go so far as to shave his very thick moustache down for the day into a Hitler stache. I'm thinking he couldn't get away with that one any more. I always wondered what would happen if he was pulled over by the police on the day of his presentation.
    as long as he wasnt prince harry he'd be fine :D
    live pearl jam is best pearl jam
  • Them-BonesThem-Bones Posts: 518
    My Spanish teacher last year was quite crazy, I remember one day I walked in like 3 minutes and he was playing Time by Pink Floyd and he was having the class interpret the lyrics, and he was always telling us the school was gonna shut down in a couple of years because of the government.

    Oh and he said one time the grunge movement was started by REM in Seattle.
    "If my thoughts, dreams, could be seen, they'd probably put my head, in a guillotine, but it's alright ma, it's life and life only."
  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    oh yeah.....my spanish teacher was in love with richard ramirez......THE FUCKING NIGHT STALKER!!!!!!......:eek:
  • bobbyd3bobbyd3 Posts: 89
    My fifth grade teacher used to molest a girl in my class, whenever we went to gym/art/music he would keep her back and well I dont wanna think about it. He got caught mid-year, not sure what happened to the girl. I saw her in class again in junior high for a while then she vanished again
  • brain of cbrain of c Posts: 5,213
    i was the photographer for the school newspaper/year book.......the advisor was so whacked out i dropped the class mid year.......she was fired the next year for being coked up on the job........hi, tate cooper.......oh yeah, that was also a lie........betty tate, larry told me to tell you he says hi.......
    d'oh!!!!!!

    http://www.myspace.com/brain_of_c
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