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New Tattoo

Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
edited January 2012 in All Encompassing Trip
Larry gets home late one night and Linda, his wife, says, "Where in
the hell have you been?"

Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."

"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"

"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disgust.

"Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed
on his privates?"

"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.

Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.

Three, I like how money feels in my hand.

And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right
here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."
My drinking team has a hockey problem

The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • chiquimonkeychiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    heeheee
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    heeheee


    I like that one :)
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • AhnimusAhnimus Posts: 10,560
    Tattos are for clones

    Dudes in tight white striped shirts wearing cologne

    Cookie-cutter citizens gone wrong
    I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Ahnimus wrote:
    Tattos are for clones

    Dudes in tight white striped shirts wearing cologne

    Cookie-cutter citizens gone wrong
    Did you bother to read the joke?? lol
    That was very funny. :p Not your remark..the joke ;)
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • AhnimusAhnimus Posts: 10,560
    TrixieCat wrote:
    Did you bother to read the joke?? lol
    That was very funny. :p Not your remark..the joke ;)

    Yea, funny joke. But Tattoos make me puke. They used to be something you got to brand yourself an individual, now, not getting a tattoo is more original.

    Funny how people strive for individuality and in the wake end up just like everyone else.
    I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
  • anothercloneanotherclone Posts: 1,688
    Ahnimus wrote:
    Yea, funny joke. But Tattoos make me puke. They used to be something you got to brand yourself an individual, now, not getting a tattoo is more original.

    Funny how people strive for individuality and in the wake end up just like everyone else.

    awww, what's the matter? got some sand in your vagina today? :p
  • AhnimusAhnimus Posts: 10,560
    anotherclone wrote:
    awww, what's the matter? got some sand in your vagina today? :p

    I don't have a vagina, since I'm a man. Did you get some siphilus in your brain?
    I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
  • anothercloneanotherclone Posts: 1,688
    Ahnimus wrote:
    I don't have a vagina, since I'm a man. Did you get some siphilus in your brain?

    Yah, I figured you were a guy. My comment was meant to be a joke.

    I could see how you would miss the fact it was a joke. Considering I don't smell anything vaguely resembling a sense of humor around you.
  • AhnimusAhnimus Posts: 10,560
    anotherclone wrote:
    Yah, I figured you were a guy. My comment was meant to be a joke.

    I could see how you would miss the fact it was a joke. Considering I don't smell anything vaguely resembling a sense of humor around you.

    I recognized it as a joke, but an extremely crued and offensive joke lacking entirely in any humorous qualities.
    I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
  • anothercloneanotherclone Posts: 1,688
    Ahnimus wrote:
    I recognized it as a joke, but an extremely crued and offensive joke lacking entirely in any humorous qualities.

    darn it, and I was really shooting for for all class and sophistication. pity.
  • AhnimusAhnimus Posts: 10,560
    anotherclone wrote:
    darn it, and I was really shooting for for all class and sophistication. pity.

    See, that was kind of funny.
    I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Ahnimus wrote:
    I don't have a vagina, since I'm a man. Did you get some siphilus in your brain?
    Now, see, that may be the problem. ;)
    I promise you I meant that to be funny. :)
    I don't have any tattoos, nor do I want any. I just thought it was funny.
    Low-brow, but cute.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    i like a good classy joke like that one.

    i want another tattoo...


    hey let's be individuals together!
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    As far as the joke's concerned, it's the kind of thing my mum finds funny. :o
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    :|
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • RygarRygar Posts: 8,690
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    :|
    Damn you've lost weight man. Sell that bike too, before you get in an accident.
  • BLACK35BLACK35 Hanover, Ontario Posts: 22,853
    funny joke :lol:
    2005 - London
    2009 - Toronto
    2010 - Buffalo
    2011 - Toronto 1&2
    2013 - London, Pittsburgh, Buffalo
    2014 - Cincinnati, St. Louis, Detroit
    2016 - Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Ottawa, Toronto 1
    2018 - Fenway 1&2
    2022 - Hamilton, Toronto
    2023 - Chicago 1&2
    2024 - Las Vegas 1&2
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    Rygar wrote:
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    :|
    Damn you've lost weight man. Sell that bike too, before you get in an accident.

    All I've been eating/drinking is Faithful Ale

    Its catching up to me
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
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