A question for parents

OffHeGoes29
OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
edited August 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?
BRING BACK THE WHALE
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  • kcherub
    kcherub Posts: 961
    I would never want to, but it all depends upon one's circumstances. My father has lived in Texas since I was 4, and although I lived there (with my mother and stepfather) until I was 12, I haven't lived close to him in 22 years. We are still very close. It takes effort, but it can be done.

    With children, I think that while they do need your presence, if you can't be "with" them, keeping in constant touch with them is more than some people do.

    I can tell you are a good parent just because you asked. :)
    I still want you all to "take care"--I am just damn tired of typing it.

    http://www.youtube.com/user/kcherub#p/a/u/0/N-UQprRqSwo
  • gobrowns19
    gobrowns19 Posts: 1,447
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?

    No, i wouldn't be able to do that.
    Happiness is only real when shared
  • OffHeGoes29
    OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    kcherub wrote:

    I can tell you are a good parent just because you asked. :)

    I don't have any kids, but thanks anyway.
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • kcherub
    kcherub Posts: 961
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    I don't have any kids, but thanks anyway.

    So, were you taking a poll? ;)
    I still want you all to "take care"--I am just damn tired of typing it.

    http://www.youtube.com/user/kcherub#p/a/u/0/N-UQprRqSwo
  • OffHeGoes29
    OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    kcherub wrote:
    So, were you taking a poll? ;)

    No, just getting a feel for people's opinion. I have to confront my mom on some personal stuff about this.
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?

    funny you should mention that.
    though im not married nor have i ever been my two youngest children will be living with their father once they reach high school within the next 2 years. i wont be on another coast and i will see them frequently. i have no qualms about doing this and my son is so thrilled at the prospect, hes practically gone already. itll be good for all involved cause i will be a better parent with the distance. no one needs to be living with me fulltime, that i can assure you. :D
    hear my name
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  • reversedarwinism
    reversedarwinism Posts: 1,151
    Twice a year? Couldn't live with that. My baby girl(just turned 5, OMG) is 30 min away and I get to see her all the time, and I couldn't have it any other way.
    bombs, dropping down, please forgive our hometown
  • OffHeGoes29
    OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    catefrances wrote:
    funny you should mention that.
    though im not married nor have i ever been my two youngest children will be living with their father once they reach high school within the next 2 years. i wont be on another coast and i will see them frequently. i have no qualms about doing this and my son is so thrilled at the prospect, hes practically gone already. itll be good for all involved cause i will be a better parent with the distance. no one needs to be living with me fulltime, that i can assure you. :D

    Yeah, but you're apart of their lives. Its good to see they will be able to know their father more.
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • kcherub
    kcherub Posts: 961
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    No, just getting a feel for people's opinion. I have to confront my mom on some personal stuff about this.

    Well, good luck with the talk. I hope that too much damage hasn't been done. :)
    I still want you all to "take care"--I am just damn tired of typing it.

    http://www.youtube.com/user/kcherub#p/a/u/0/N-UQprRqSwo
  • OffHeGoes29
    OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    kcherub wrote:
    Well, good luck with the talk. I hope that too much damage hasn't been done. :)

    Well things can stay in the past, but she wants to be a part of my life now that I'm an adult, but honestly, she lost that right. I would like for her to be a part of my life, but she has to be honest with me about why she moved away.

    I think some people don't want the responsibilty of raising their kids, thats why I'm holding out untill I'm good a ready.
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • Inhiding230
    Inhiding230 Posts: 362
    Nope, that would not have been an option for me, which was why I fought for full custody and got it.

    My ex on the otherhand, got one weekend a month supervised visitation and complained about it for a year. Then he took off to Florida 2 years ago and has been to visit my daughter once since then. He has her email address and our mailing address, but doesn't so much as send her a birthday or Xmas card. There is absolutely no excuse for that in my opinion.
  • Brain of J.Lo
    Brain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?

    No WAY!

    If, for some reason, I failed to get custody, I would move next door to my kid. ;)

    I can't imagine being away from her for more than a few days at a time, even though she's a toddler! :D
  • OffHeGoes29
    OffHeGoes29 Posts: 1,240
    Well what if the other parent said they wouldn't let you see the kids more than a couple times a year, would you still fight it?
    BRING BACK THE WHALE
  • TrixieCat
    TrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?
    No.
    I can not see this as an option ever.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • meme
    meme Posts: 4,695
    TrixieCat wrote:
    No.
    I can not see this as an option ever.

    Me neither. Perhaps when he is older. But actually no, twice a year is too little time :)
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    Yeah, but you're apart of their lives. Its good to see they will be able to know their father more.

    to be honest i doubt they could know there father more than they already do. the interesting thing for me to watch is how theyve related to him over the years considering my son was 18 months old and my daughter 3 months from being born when we broke up. neither of them has ever shown any hesitation towards him.

    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    Well what if the other parent said they wouldn't let you see the kids more than a couple times a year, would you still fight it?

    fuck that bullshit. id be fighting that for sure. the children are not the property of anyone and certainly not the other parent.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • acoustic guy
    acoustic guy Posts: 3,770
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?
    There is no way this could EVER happen. An army could not keep me away from my daughter.
    Way to much love there between us.

    LOL if my wife kicked me out I would buy the house next door to her. :)
    Get em a Body Bag Yeeeeeaaaaa!
    Sweep the Leg Johnny.
  • nocode23
    nocode23 Posts: 411
    There is absolutely no way I could live that far away from my kids. I have a hard enough time when I have to be gone for more than a day. I couldn't imagine only seeing them twice a year. It would kill me.
  • urbanhippie
    urbanhippie Posts: 3,007
    I couldn't do it. Which is why I have full custody of my kids. I have no intention of moving, and at the moment I live 10 minutes away from my ex.

    He hasn't been in touch with them for a month, no calls, no visits, nothing. When we first split he vowed that he would always be there for the kids and that nothing would stop him from seeing them. It soon wore off. I'm still where I've always been and so are they, but he's nowhere to be found.

    My eldest passed his GCSE's last week and I texted his dad the results. No response, not even a well done, nothing. I can't force him to take an interest in his children,even though I'd like to.

    I can bet though, that if I said I was going to move to the other side of the country, he'd fight me tooth and nail, and accuse me of taking his children away from him, when in reality he's pushed them away all by himself :(
    A human being that was given to fly.

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  • dunkman
    dunkman Posts: 19,646
    OffHeGoes29 wrote:
    If you got divorced, could you leave your kids with the other parent and only see them twice a year while living on the other side of the country?

    no... but what country you mean? if i lived on the other side of my country i'd only be about 70 miles away from them.

    but the answer is still no.

    my kids are more important to me than a job.
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.

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