Adoption..have or are

lavalounge2000

Getting ever closer to getting our adopted 4 year old from Guatemala soon. What a journey! Just had a vibe to ask here, how your trip was.

Many thanks,

Lava

GraySaturday

thats wonderful. Kudos to you for adopting.. its not for everyone, but there are so many children who need homes. I hope it goes wonderfully for you.

If I do chose to become a parents, I will only do so through adoption. Its a hard process for everyone involved though..

Drop The Leash 10

cool! ive always thought of adopting as a smart idea.


i was adopted, formally a member of the slap-a-ho tribe.


P.S. is Lava your real name? cause, if so, that is AWESOME!!

Enkidu

Congrats and good luck, I have a birth son and an adopted daughter. The adoption took almost two years (India), but it was so so worth it. She's 11 now and wonderful (and a PJ fan, of course).

edvedder913

Good luck to you! That is wonderful.

I am adopted - my parents told me at a very early age - so it's been part of my life since I can remember. My brother (not blood) is adopted too.

If you have any questions, feel free to PM me.

lavalounge2000

All thanks for responding. Had a feeling to ask on the list and happy to get some responses. We have one Bio son and have always wanted to adopt for reasons you all stated, lets help out if we can. There are so many children out there who need someone, be it a big brother/sister, fostering or even adoption. We wanted to foster but felt that when the child moved it would effect us in many ways. Obviously our pending son will know he is adopted, and we wont candy coat the situation, he has been in foster care for almost 10 months. His mother had to give him up as she could not feed him anymore and his health was not the best, and her health was failing as well while she tried to keep him healthy.

For those who are thinking on adopting, it does not happen overnight. We have been in this for almost 4 years with many bumps in the road. Ups and downs. You think things are finished or over then you get some good news. DNA tests done and hopefully a trip to visit soon.

Thanks again to all for letting me share!

Lava

reeferchief

Technically I adopted my girlfriends two eldest children and we now have one of our own as well, not quite the same, but since I'm now their father figure it is still adoption in a sense.:)

Dylan Stone

That is a great thing. How exciting!

For the record...There are also A LOT o kids in the foster care system here in the US that are already legally *freed* for adoption. The fact that they are *freed* removes the whole "what if the take the child away from me" heartache.

However..once a kid is in the system you do have to be a certified foster parent (even if you never take in any traditional foster kids) in order to adopt.

It's a great, inexpensive way to adopt. IN NY many parents will continue to receive a monthly stipend (not means tested---based on the child) and medicaid if necessary.

PS- Four years is a REALLY long time? I'm curious as to why you chose to go the Guatemala route if it ended up taking four years anyway? What a long nerve wracking process that must have been and how happy you will be once he is yours!! Again... congratulations!

lavalounge2000

GTFLYGIRL wrote:

That is a great thing. How exciting!

For the record...There are also A LOT o kids in the foster care system here in the US that are already legally *freed* for adoption. The fact that they are *freed* removes the whole "what if the take the child away from me" heartache.

However..once a kid is in the system you do have to be a certified foster parent (even if you never take in any traditional foster kids) in order to adopt.

It's a great, inexpensive way to adopt. IN NY many parents will continue to receive a monthly stipend (not means tested---based on the child) and medicaid if necessary.

PS- Four years is a REALLY long time? I'm curious as to why you chose to go the Guatemala route if it ended up taking four years anyway? What a long nerve wracking process that must have been and how happy you will be once he is yours!! Again... congratulations!

Foster Adoption in NJ has changed in the past 5 years. When we wanted to foster adopt, the state will place a child from the county you reside in and you can foster with the hopes child will be released to the parents. It is a total open adoption. Problem comes when the state deems that the parents are able to get their kids back, unless they relinquish their rights. Dont get me wrong we wanted to adopt locally but we were not ready to "give up" a child just because the state says the parents are ready. I have herd of to many heart breaking stories where the parents return to there life style and loose the kids again.

Chose Guat for several reasons, a lot of kids need homes there. they are in foster care, parents are healthy (drug use and alcoholism is low there) and short in country stay to adopt. We also wanted a child that was older 3-6 thinking that they had a higher need as most parents want a new born. We started with Guatemala for those reasons and also thought that there were so many children in orphanages that we complete our family sooner. Quickly found out early in the process that kids in orphanages do not have legal support and many do not have relinquishment. That is a long drown our process and given all the problems with international adoptions these days it makes it real hard to adopt a child who was dropped off at an orphanage.

Thanks for the kind thoughts!!