Cheer me up

WildChildRose

I need some cheering up. Can someone post funny jokes or something or tell me how horrible their day went so mine won't look so bad? Though I don't think anyone could top mine... but I'm not going to post it.

Thanks PJ buddies.

pouch15

WildChildRose wrote:

I need some cheering up. Can someone post funny jokes or something or tell me how horrible their day went so mine won't look so bad? Though I don't think anyone could top mine... but I'm not going to post it.

Thanks PJ buddies.

sorry, my day is going actually great and looks even better. let me think about a joke, I dont know a lot of jokes in english

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office... but she was dating someone else.
One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, 'I'll give you $100 if you let me have sex with you...
'The girl looked at him, and then said, 'NO!'
Eddie said, 'I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up.'
She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boyfriend... so she called him and explained the situation.
Her boyfriend says, 'Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down.'
She agreed and accepts the proposal.
Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what happened...?
Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, 'The bastard had all quarters!'

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

Little Johnny paints a sign that reads:
"WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A DIME."
He tells his buddy Roy to get his wagon and both sit under a shade tree in Johnny's front yard, waiting for business.
Kathy, across the street is not to be outdone, so she paints a bigger sign that reads:
"WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A NICKEL."
She tells her friend Nellie to get her wagon, and they both sit in front of Kathy's yard.
Johnny's pissed. How dare that GIRL?
Then, a flash and Johnny hauls Roy across the street saying, "Let's get some laughs."
"Say, Kathy, you move ANYTHING?"
"Give me a nickel and I'll prove it to you."
"Roy, give me your nickel!"
Johnny takes it and hands it to Kathy.
"What you want moved, boy?"
"Move my BOWELS!" Johnny said and starts laughing.
So Kathy kicked the shit out of him.

EvilMerlin

WildChildRose wrote:

I need some cheering up. Can someone post funny jokes or something or tell me how horrible their day went so mine won't look so bad? Though I don't think anyone could top mine... but I'm not going to post it.

Thanks PJ buddies.

A shitty situation:

You could be shifted three hours over to live in Moses Lake, work 60 hours a week to fix a mess you didn't create that'll take a few months to get under control, have all your files gone missing, have no way to connect to your home server to get your original designs and drawings, find two lumps on yourself, and have to leave your dogs at home and can't bring them with you. All while a family member is on their death bed. :(

Or a lame joke.

What did the snowman say to the other snowman?

Smells like carrots!

WildChildRose

EvilMerlin wrote:

A shitty situation:

You could be shifted three hours over to live in Moses Lake, work 60 hours a week to fix a mess you didn't create that'll take a few months to get under control, have all your files gone missing, have no way to connect to your home server to get your original designs and drawings, find two lumps on yourself, and have to leave your dogs at home and can't bring them with you. All while a family member is on their death bed. :(

Or a lame joke.

What did the snowman say to the other snowman?

Smells like carrots!

F%^k! Dude that is awful. And here I thought my life was bad. :( I'd still trade you though.

WildChildRose

StateOfLoveBoatCptn. wrote:

Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office... but she was dating someone else.
One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, 'I'll give you $100 if you let me have sex with you...
'The girl looked at him, and then said, 'NO!'
Eddie said, 'I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up.'
She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boyfriend... so she called him and explained the situation.
Her boyfriend says, 'Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down.'
She agreed and accepts the proposal.
Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what happened...?
Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, 'The bastard had all quarters!'

LOL.. I started laughing as soon as I read the name Eddie. Thanks.

WildChildRose

StateOfLoveBoatCptn. wrote:

Little Johnny paints a sign that reads:
"WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A DIME."
He tells his buddy Roy to get his wagon and both sit under a shade tree in Johnny's front yard, waiting for business.
Kathy, across the street is not to be outdone, so she paints a bigger sign that reads:
"WE MOVE ANYTHING FOR A NICKEL."
She tells her friend Nellie to get her wagon, and they both sit in front of Kathy's yard.
Johnny's pissed. How dare that GIRL?
Then, a flash and Johnny hauls Roy across the street saying, "Let's get some laughs."
"Say, Kathy, you move ANYTHING?"
"Give me a nickel and I'll prove it to you."
"Roy, give me your nickel!"
Johnny takes it and hands it to Kathy.
"What you want moved, boy?"
"Move my BOWELS!" Johnny said and starts laughing.
So Kathy kicked the shit out of him.

:-D

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

WildChildRose wrote:

LOL.. I started laughing as soon as I read the name Eddie. Thanks.

Thought you might like that one....

SENROCK

StateOfLoveBoatCptn. wrote:

Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office... but she was dating someone else.
One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, 'I'll give you $100 if you let me have sex with you...
'The girl looked at him, and then said, 'NO!'
Eddie said, 'I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up.'
She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boyfriend... so she called him and explained the situation.
Her boyfriend says, 'Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down.'
She agreed and accepts the proposal.
Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what happened...?
Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, 'The bastard had all quarters!'

Why is this not post of the day??!!!!!

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

SENROCK! wrote:

Why is this not post of the day??!!!!!

lets just say it was

SENROCK

StateOfLoveBoatCptn. wrote:

lets just say it was

it TOTALLY IS!!!!!

GOSSArDgEEK

Thank you StateOfLoveBoatCptn I needed good laugh as well
The quarter joke is my favorite

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

GOSSArDgEEK wrote:

Thank you StateOfLoveBoatCptn I needed good laugh as well
The quarter joke is my favorite

here to help....here to help

(and hopefully get some work done in between)

WildChildRose

Thanks everyone. So depressed. :( Little things like that really help.

writersu

Here for you, ok?

Some thoughts.........


it is still summer.......

when summer is over, fall will be here and I don't know about you but after August, jeans feel nice

today is Friday and tomorrow is Saturday and then Sunday and even if you have no plans, you may not have any pressures either

you can still type

you still have the internet

and last but not least, you always have US............

writersu

StateOfLoveBoatCptn. wrote:

Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office... but she was dating someone else.
One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, 'I'll give you $100 if you let me have sex with you...
'The girl looked at him, and then said, 'NO!'
Eddie said, 'I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up.'
She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her boyfriend... so she called him and explained the situation.
Her boyfriend says, 'Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down.'
She agreed and accepts the proposal.
Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his girlfriend's call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what happened...?
Still breathing hard, she managed to reply, 'The bastard had all quarters!'

Ok, hope the "eddie" reference won't get this whole thing spinning in a wrong direction but ..........not in regard to the name, so let's not go there.....


but the quarters........the timeframe.........where are guys like this???????

WildChildRose

writersu wrote:

Here for you, ok?

Some thoughts.........


it is still summer.......

when summer is over, fall will be here and I don't know about you but after August, jeans feel nice

today is Friday and tomorrow is Saturday and then Sunday and even if you have no plans, you may not have any pressures either

you can still type

you still have the internet

and last but not least, you always have US............

Thanks. Just going through a bit of a rough patch. :-/

You know, I wear jeans all year round..... hasn't been much of a summer out here really.

Yes I am happy it's the weekend... i am sad bc I will be alone all weekend (at the house) but I have to go to a wedding (horrible bc I'm having rel problems)
tomorrow.

BUT thank god for my friends and my PJ buds and bud.... :-D

HOOKER

You have a nice ass.

WildChildRose

HOOKER wrote:

You have a nice ass.

ha! when i saw you replied, i was a little worried what you would say.

HOOKER

WildChildRose wrote:

ha! when i saw you replied, i was a little worried what you would say.

lol Why were you afraid?