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Would you read anything into it if...

EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
edited May 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?
Paris 7/11/96
Manchester 4/6/00
Post edited by Unknown User on

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  • orig_long redorig_long red Posts: 2,029
    spank bank.
    Jam out with your clam out.
  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    long red wrote:
    spank bank.

    LOL WTF does that mean?

    P.S. *cheers* 500th post
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    EddiE wrote:
    an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?


    facebook is 28% responsible for all marriage break-ups... although i'm only 0.03% accurate with my statistics.. the other 99.99% of the time i just make them up.

    personally this kind of thing scares me... old skeletons coming out of the closet.. is that the phrase?
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • pearljamjenpearljamjen Posts: 13,578
    EddiE wrote:
    an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?

    WEIRD you say that cuz last week MY EX decided to use the chat feature on Facebook to start a convo with me. He started going down memory lane...which was kinda hard for me and I didn't really want to do. And the he would talk about his serious relationship...but then kept going to talk about how things were with me, etc. It was weird, and I kept trying to change the subject. Then a couple days ago he did it AGAIN! He got annoyed at me because I told him I didn't want to talk about the subject he was discussing...but yeah, it is weird!

    As for how would I read it, well I think with my situation both of still have feelings on some level...we only ended things because I moved out of that country, and I went back to visit him the following year and it was super wonderful...but then we kind of went our own ways. It definitely sounds like your person is wondering "what if," and perhaps thinks you are the one that got away? Dunno...
  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    EddiE wrote:
    LOL WTF does that mean?

    P.S. *cheers* 500th post

    LOL, the memories you keep of certain partners for the use of future masturbation sessions.
  • orig_long redorig_long red Posts: 2,029
    EddiE wrote:
    LOL WTF does that mean?

    P.S. *cheers* 500th post

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=spank+bank
    Jam out with your clam out.
  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    EvilMerlin wrote:
    LOL, the memories you keep of certain partners for the use of future masturbation sessions.

    LMFAO...I like it.

    I just have to point out that a) She dumped me, and I was totally crushed for about 3 years after it, still am to a certain point, b) she contacted me and c) she initiated the whole "do you ever think about us etc etc" conversation. Very unnerving, very very unnerving.
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • orig_long redorig_long red Posts: 2,029
    EddiE wrote:
    LMFAO...I like it.

    I just have to point out that a) She dumped me, and I was totally crushed for about 3 years after it, still am to a certain point, b) she contacted me and c) she initiated the whole "do you ever think about us etc etc" conversation. Very unnerving, very very unnerving.


    she wants to sex you. i say do it and do it rough. revenge is a dish best served in bed. along with breakfast.
    Jam out with your clam out.
  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    Oh and to be more on topic...I've had an ex contact me. It didn't turn out well. She's got a fiance now and all that stuff. Says life is great, blah blah blah...except their sex life is boring, and he doesn't get her going like I did and that they're not adventurous. So she asked if she could try it out with me to see if she wants more, or to at least go for a final ride.

    Kind of caught me off guard, and that got a swift goodbye from me. I don't wanna dip my hands into that situation. Anyway, we were together for a little while in highschool, senior year(I was her first), and well that was it, and then she met her current fiance, and she was his first, and they've been going strong for well about 6 years now. So they've got their high school sweethearts story sorta, well I guess college sweethearts. They knew each other in high school though, didn't start till colloege, but I'll just stay away. It was nice to hear from her and know that she's doing good, I mean I wasn't in love with her or anything, but it's always nice to hear when people are doing well, but I wish it ended just at that. It just got kind of...weird. She still attempts talking to me in that fashion once in a while and keeps saying the offer is still there.
  • ChazzChazz Posts: 1,141
    EddiE wrote:
    an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?

    Sounds to me like she wants to start something maybe? She may be married but is she HAPPILY married....(that just my opinion though :o )
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  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    EddiE wrote:
    LMFAO...I like it.

    I just have to point out that a) She dumped me, and I was totally crushed for about 3 years after it, still am to a certain point, b) she contacted me and c) she initiated the whole "do you ever think about us etc etc" conversation. Very unnerving, very very unnerving.

    I'm sorry to hear that. I wrote up my experience with that, that seems similar...maybe she's having second thoughts? Or a stale sex life?

    My ex was trying to get the, "what could have been between us?" factor out of me...and then the sex too. So I was weirded out...mainly because I wasn't that into her back then as far as a relationship, and she's acting like we were in love, and two, I'm just not attracted to her. Her 20's haven't been kind to her so far in the first half. :p

    So I'd say that's a situation that if you're going to approach, be very very cautious. Especially if it was hard on you the first time, don't let this go around get to you if anything does happen with your talks. Don't want your memories of the times after she was gone getting the best of you again.
  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    long red wrote:
    she wants to sex you. i say do it and do it rough. revenge is a dish best served naked.
    She's married though, for the past 3 years....so I aint going there. It kinda pissed me off that she brought the subject up, it raked up a shit load of feeling even after all this time, my head's been really messed up today because of it all :(
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • DissidentmanDissidentman Posts: 15,378
    definitely read into that.

    In my opinion, people in relationships should not have facebook/myspace pages. They appear to be "hook-up" websites and have been the cause of countless fights between friends of mine who have pages.
  • Sian-of-the-deadSian-of-the-dead Posts: 8,963
    dunkman wrote:
    facebook is 28% responsible for all marriage break-ups... although i'm only 0.03% accurate with my statistics.. the other 99.99% of the time i just make them up.

    personally this kind of thing scares me... old skeletons coming out of the closet.. is that the phrase?

    Dunk, you never fail to make me chuckle :D

    Man's got a point though. Facebook is a little bleeder for skeletons and closets. I personally would read into it if one of my ex's did that to me.

    Lay down the law man, say no offence and hope you're not reading too much into it and all but you're not interested... she might laugh at you and say she wasn't contacting you for that but whats a little confusion/bruised pride compared to the trouble it could lead to? Let her know you don't see her like that anymore... unless you do?
    Been to this many PJ shows: Reading 2006 London 2007 Manchester & London 2009 Dublin, Belfast, London, Nijmegen & Berlin 2010 Manchester 1 & Manchester 2 2012...

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  • Sian-of-the-deadSian-of-the-dead Posts: 8,963
    dissidentman wrote:
    definitely read into that.

    In my opinion, people in relationships should not have facebook/myspace pages. They appear to be "hook-up" websites and have been the cause of countless fights between friends of mine who have pages.

    I disagree. I have alot of friends around the world whom I keep in contact with on facebook.
    The site CAN be used for hooking up but If you're in a relationship, make it obvious and you won't need to fight them off. My profile lists me as being 'In a relationship' with Audio and, since I changed it, I've had very little hassle.
    Been to this many PJ shows: Reading 2006 London 2007 Manchester & London 2009 Dublin, Belfast, London, Nijmegen & Berlin 2010 Manchester 1 & Manchester 2 2012...

    ... and I still think Drive-By Truckers are better.
  • drivingrldrivingrl Posts: 1,448
    EddiE wrote:
    an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?

    Yes.
    drivingrl: "Will I ever get to meet Gwen Stefani?"
    kevinbeetle: "Yes. When her career washes up and her and Gavin move to Galveston, you will meet her at Hot Topic shopping for a Japanese cheerleader outfit.

    Next!"
  • DissidentmanDissidentman Posts: 15,378
    Sian-of-the-dead wrote:
    I disagree. I have alot of friends around the world whom I keep in contact with on facebook.
    The site CAN be used for hooking up but If you're in a relationship, make it obvious and you won't need to fight them off. My profile lists me as being 'In a relationship' with Audio and, since I changed it, I've had very little hassle.

    Well that's good then. I keep in touch with friends the old fashioned way, email. :)
  • jlarson75jlarson75 Posts: 113
    Your post reminded me of something Adam Carolla said on his radio show yesterday. They were talking about wanting closure when a relationship ended- maybe meeting for lunch to "close" things, or something like that. His take on the idea was that "closure" was really "openjure," meaning that if you want what you think is "closure," you really have feelings left and want things to continue in some manner. As he said, the best "closure" is nothing at all.
  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    Well I've got to tell you, I was online last night, and so was she. I wasn't going to make the first move (i.e. pm her first). Eventually she pm'd me just to say hello etc, asked her how her day was (she had had a shitty day with work etc, she asked me (had a shit day but for other reasons), didn't really want to go into detail with her, but she pushed it and pushed so I just told her I was a bit head fucked from the conversation we had had the night before. She got a huge strop cos I wouldnt explain why, on so I caved in and told her that it raked alot of old feelings and memories up for me, and I was just working them through kinda thing. She got stroppy again then said she was logging cos she was up early for work the next day (it was 10.30 at this point). WTF am I supposed to think about that??? Yes, I do have feelings for her after all this time (well maybe feelings of "what if")....yes, I know she's married....no, I wouldn't get involved if it did come out that she wanted to. I just don't know what to think. I think I should block her on my msn list, I just don't know wtf to think....as I said, it's been a total headfuck.
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    EddiE wrote:
    She's married though, for the past 3 years....so I aint going there. It kinda pissed me off that she brought the subject up, it raked up a shit load of feeling even after all this time, my head's been really messed up today because of it all :(
    :eek: wow... well you showed great restraint... that's pretty admirable! But yeh, whatever about the reasons people ask these things, if they get a firm no they should leave it there and not keep bringing it up. To the OP be very very careful... this could fuck with your head :( . Maybe it's time for YOU to take control of the situation this time and tell her in no uncertain terms that you never look back and things happen for a reason!
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
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  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    jlarson75 wrote:
    Your post reminded me of something Adam Carolla said on his radio show yesterday. They were talking about wanting closure when a relationship ended- maybe meeting for lunch to "close" things, or something like that. His take on the idea was that "closure" was really "openjure," meaning that if you want what you think is "closure," you really have feelings left and want things to continue in some manner. As he said, the best "closure" is nothing at all.
    That's bollox. I've got closure a couple of times... it definitely exists... and no, I didn't still have feelings but things didn't end with me having a full understanding of why or because I wasn't letting my true feelings be shown. The way I got full closure was by being completely honest about my past feelings and how I've moved on... therefore CLOSING the chapter.
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • Obi OnceObi Once Posts: 918
    long red wrote:
    she wants to sex you. i say do it and do it rough. revenge is a dish best served in bed. along with breakfast.
    I'm with Long Red, do it and get her out of you system.

    The whole thing sounds very familiar. She just wants to check up on you and see how your feeling about what happened, to see what her options are if the thing she's in turns sour.
    your light's reflected now
  • brain of cbrain of c Posts: 5,213
    never turn down an offer. even if you don't want it.
    d'oh!!!!!!

    http://www.myspace.com/brain_of_c
  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    brain of c wrote:
    never turn down an offer. even if you don't want it.

    LOL...thanks...helps alot :oS
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • brain of cbrain of c Posts: 5,213
    it's a man law.

    after it happened to me, she said "you used to last longer" my reply was "it didn't used to be possible to build a tent city from your panties."



    true story.
    d'oh!!!!!!

    http://www.myspace.com/brain_of_c
  • SENROCKSENROCK Posts: 10,736
    EddiE wrote:
    an ex girlfriend (or boyfriend) from years ago contacted you through Facebook and started talking about the old days, how you made them feel, things you wish had happened etc, even though they said they were now married?
    the only thing you should read into this is the person is NOT happily married.
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  • JordyWordyJordyWordy Posts: 2,261
    EddiE wrote:
    WTF am I supposed to think about that??? Yes, I do have feelings for her after all this time (well maybe feelings of "what if")....yes, I know she's married....no, I wouldn't get involved if it did come out that she wanted to. I just don't know what to think. I think I should block her on my msn list, I just don't know wtf to think....as I said, it's been a total headfuck.

    i think Obi once and BrainofC are right....shes just looking to see if u & her cud hook up, and if the chance arises its a great way to get her out of your system.

    It'll only fuck with your head if you let it. Id say she lost her cool because she didnt want to hear that she'd fucked around with your head (its never nice to hear that), but you were right to tell her. say it how it is. just sleep with her and have a general attitude of contempt towards her afterwards and everything will be fine
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