Being friends with a guy...
kc_pj
Posts: 284
A friend of mine wants to just be friends (always have since met last year), but he does like to talk a bit dirty and even be a little physicial... so fellas, why do you do this? Do you want more or something else?
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My small self. Like a book amongst the many on a shelf."
"I'm already 30% more unpredictable."
-Pam Beesly
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your probably very cool, but he does like you alot.
-Greg Dulli
I'm just the same and I'm a girl. A lot of the time I'm being friendly and over silly. Maybe he is being the same???
My small self. Like a book amongst the many on a shelf."
"I'm already 30% more unpredictable."
-Pam Beesly
...but yeah, I do flirt with girls I'm not even interested in. But then those I am interested with don't give good feedback, makes me sad sometimes. :(
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So you want to be friends, even if the gal would be interested in maybe something more?
My small self. Like a book amongst the many on a shelf."
"I'm already 30% more unpredictable."
-Pam Beesly
If it's the first then he's probably just seeing how far he can push it. If a guy stays friends when he wants more then it's probably taken as a challenge of sorts to win the girl over.
If it's the second, then flirt with him like Hushbull said. If he suddenly starts backing away or stops with the flirting then he's probably not interested.
Guys are weird. I guess from a girl's point of view it's hard to differentiate between friendly flirting and interested flirting.
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flirting is fun, it makes you happy, it gives you a laugh - but if you flirt with someone, does that mean you have chemistry?? you dont flirt with all your friends, do you?? so does that mean that friendship is a little bit different, or has the potential to be more?? or does it mean that each of you is trying to make the other make the move so you dont end up looking stupid for reading it wrong??
so, begs another question - if you do have a great friend boy/girl, and you both reguarly flirt your arses off with each other - and you cross that line - is it possible to be 'just friends' who happen to jump in the sack together every now & then (so long as you both know that all your doing) - or is it a guaranteed friendship killer??
ugh, he probably fancies you. that's exactly what was happening with me and my male friend, but now that i have a boyfriend. my male friend told me to back off, and then started going around telling rumors that i don't have time for him anymore, when he was the one to push me away. eh what an idiot he is! i'd hate to admit this but maybe soulsinging was right about about men and women not being able to be friends because there would always be that sexual factor. eh, i just don't fucking know anymore. one thing i know for sure is that i will keep all the men i meet in future at a distance, unless that man is my boyfriend. i fucking fed up with their shit.
so my point is that this guy later on will try to:
either fuck you
or be your boyfriend
and if you refuse and say you want to stay friends:
then he will loose interest in you and will walk away
or will say yes and will still try to get into your pants, and when you get a boyfriend, he will get upset and wouldn't want to see you anymore.
but i can't say all men a like that, so to be politically correct i will say that i'm talking about majority of men here
She and I talk about sex all the time. Is that what you mean by talking dirty?
We sometimes reminisce about how we used to get each other off. I'll say, "Gawd I used to love it when you did this..." She'll go, "...and I liked it when you did that.."
Just the other night I gave her a long speech about jerking off. She actually sat there and listened to it.
On the same token, we talk extensively about her friendships, family problems, current b/f problems...etc.
Yes, opposite sex friendships of that nature are possible.
http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
sorry to be mean, but the only reason you can be friends with your ex is cause:
you don't want to get back together because there was a good reason for a break up, and yet you don't want to completely let go of her, because you've shared some of your life with her and she is part of your past life. therefore you both keep in touch.
wise words
I think we both just make a good team, but neither of us are interested in saying forever.
But, wutevah, what you said sounds good as well.
http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
Understanding women is no easier!!!
http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
you...nail
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A guy always wants more. A man and woman can be acquaintances in my opinion...but "friends"...no.
i've got a few gal friends that are just freinds.....
i may or may not have banged half of them at one time or anouther.
Exactly
I think it's possible for two heterosexual people of the opposite sex to be friends but not probable. I had a fella and he was gay and after 5 yrs or so that even had some complications. Only a very small % of people can have this, and an even smaller % of their spouses are willing to handle it.
here's my 2c psycobabble: whatever type of support, fun, emotion, whatever you both get from having either other as a "friends" (I'm assuming you have regular meetings?) fills a need in your life and when you both go onto to try and date other people you will not require that same need of the new, potential mate. I tell you this from experience and had I not lived thru it, I would say sure, why not be friends? :P
this is nothing that is done consciously, totally unconscious and the only way you can elimate it, is to stop seeing them on a regular basis.
On the other comment, if my hubby was talking to an ex girlfriend about jerking of and not me, call me old fashioned, but I would have a problem with that. I'm sure he would have the same problem if the role was reversed. :nono:
my husband's 2c: guys always have it in the back of their minds, why would he burn that bridge if you're willing to accept it.
I think theres an episode of Seinfeld that states it cannot be done. :fp:
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