Oh how I hate job interviews.

orig_long red
orig_long red Posts: 2,029
edited May 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
I'm wearing a suit and I'm sweating my ass off.

Now I'm off to answer retarded questions by retarted people.

"Tell me 10 of your best assets."

"Name 5 things you want to change about yourself." - how bout, I would like to be anywhere but here.
Jam out with your clam out.
Post edited by Unknown User on

Comments

  • genie
    genie Posts: 2,222
    long red wrote:
    I'm wearing a suit and I'm sweating my ass off.

    Now I'm off to answer retarded questions by retarted people.

    "Tell me 10 of your best assets."

    "Name 5 things you want to change about yourself." - how bout, I would like to be anywhere but here.

    yeah, that shit sucks.

    10 of your best assets:

    1 polite
    2 good listener
    3 attentive
    4 able to work under pressure
    5 team player
    6 punctual
    7 dedicated
    8 keen
    9 assertive
    10 have a big cock :D

    5 things you want to change about yourself

    1 develop new skills
    2 gain more experience
    3 multitask
    4 try to work quicker than you already are
    5 to be the "ideas" man, and be able to come up with ideas that will better the whole company


    :)
  • Pauk
    Pauk Posts: 1,084
    Know the feeling. Luckily since I'm going for sciency jobs there's less "Tell us your strengthes and weaknesses" questions and more "What are the side ffects of thie drug?" "How would you treat this patient?" "What drug regime would you give this person in the short and long term?" type questions. The retarded thing is I'm applying for a clinical scientists post, I'm not a doctor or a pharmacologist!
    Getting pretty fed up with patronising rejection letters though. I don't care if I was in the top 10 of 87 applicants. I don't want to feel good about myself, I just want a job!
    Paul
    '06 - London, Dublin, Reading
    '07 - Katowice, Wembley, Dusseldorf, Copenhagen, Nijmegen
    '09 - London, Manchester, London
    '12 - Manchester, Manchester, Berlin, Stockholm, Copenhagen
  • Dissidentman
    Dissidentman Posts: 15,378
    long red wrote:
    I'm wearing a suit and I'm sweating my ass off.

    Now I'm off to answer retarded questions by retarted people.

    "Tell me 10 of your best assets."

    "Name 5 things you want to change about yourself." - how bout, I would like to be anywhere but here.

    Yeah, don't clue them in to your "terrible habits" till the 2nd interview.
  • orig_long red
    orig_long red Posts: 2,029
    dissidentman wrote:
    Yeah, don't clue them in to your "terrible habits" till the 2nd interview.

    yea. chronic masturbation is not a good selling point.
    Jam out with your clam out.
  • Dissidentman
    Dissidentman Posts: 15,378
    long red wrote:
    yea. chronic masturbation is not a good selling point.

    Although "chronic" is a testament to your persistence.
  • macci
    macci Posts: 1,057
    Lol @ some of the responses - good luck, I hope you get the job!
    My lips are shaking.......
  • lksammkt
    lksammkt Posts: 127
    Yep I have a 2nd one tomorrow. I really don't know what to expect. I know that I am really excited....
    I just keep moving on....
  • PahkTheCah
    PahkTheCah Posts: 193
    A buddy of mine went into an interview and cut off the owner's tie with a pair of scissors. (true story) He was promptly escorted of the property. They called him back the next day and offered him the job.
  • LONGRD
    LONGRD Posts: 6,036
    PahkTheCah wrote:
    A buddy of mine went into an interview and cut off the owner's tie with a pair of scissors. (true story) He was promptly escorted of the property. They called him back the next day and offered him the job.
    That's sooooo bad ass :cool:
    PJ- 04/29/2003.06/24,25,27,28,30/2008.10/27,28,30,31/2009
    EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
  • elmer
    elmer Posts: 1,683
    genie wrote:

    10 of your best assets:

    1 polite
    2 good listener
    3 attentive
    4 able to work under pressure
    5 team player
    6 punctual
    7 dedicated
    8 keen
    9 assertive
    10 have a big cock :D

    5 things you want to change about yourself

    1 develop new skills
    2 gain more experience
    3 multitask
    4 try to work quicker than you already are
    5 to be the "ideas" man, and be able to come up with ideas that will better the whole company


    :)
    Professional bullshitter at hand here, s'good stuff!

    Once I came unstuck with: 5 occasions where you've helped somebody?
    Really fluffed it up! Hadn't prepared an answer for the question beforehand and I'm terrible at spontaneous public speaking in this kind of situation....actually my oratory skills aren't all that generally.
  • dunkman
    dunkman Posts: 19,646
    long red wrote:

    1. "Tell me 10 of your best assets."

    2. "Name 5 things you want to change about yourself."


    1. my fingers

    2. the toes on my left foot


    easy. :)
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • Sian-of-the-dead
    Sian-of-the-dead Posts: 8,963
    I got an interview today... I understand your angst! :o
    Been to this many PJ shows: Reading 2006 London 2007 Manchester & London 2009 Dublin, Belfast, London, Nijmegen & Berlin 2010 Manchester 1 & Manchester 2 2012...

    ... and I still think Drive-By Truckers are better.
  • MerkingBoy
    MerkingBoy Posts: 249
    Sian-of-the-dead wrote:
    I got an interview today... I understand your angst! :o
    Gudelukk, Gurl! :)
  • lksammkt
    lksammkt Posts: 127
    lksammkt wrote:
    Yep I have a 2nd one tomorrow. I really don't know what to expect. I know that I am really excited....

    So the second interview led to a third interview, and that led into an offer that I didn't like. They came back to me with something I liked. I have a new job and start June 3rd! Believe it or not I read this thread and took notes on my BlackBerry - Thanks!!!
    I just keep moving on....

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